Westonini wrote:
Achromalia wrote:
sometimes a little makeup and theatre gives you some good skeleton-looking results!! i guess there was a fictional human underneath all along~
...im joking sorta but that did happen to be my main idea in order to move away from the skeleton character. i couldnt really identify with them anymore (the character was for a completely different purpose and generally just didnt represent my personality that well anymore) and i thought it would be interesting to try blending hints of the "old" me with the ""new"" me-- after all, the old avatar actually included a gently illuminated human eye within one of the eyesockets
as for the hair, that isnt anything new for me;; its maybe more that i hadnt really represented myself as a human publically much in any meaningful way. i dont know if i still want to or not... but i didnt have a lot of options other than that one bird character i cherish deeply because he's wonderful but thats maybe one of the least self-representative characters i've used and it's a bit uncomfortable
also the mask conveniently hides the face so i dont have to design/represent it in that much detail :>
...humanness is so weird
im definitely that but the ways in which i am and am not "human" are disconcerting to me
honestly i think abstracted ghostliness is probably a lot nicer x') its just not as visually tangible and so its a little harder to draw and be expressive with in the ways id want it to be
That makes sense. It's cool how you integrated some of your old avatar into your new one with the skele mask. This is like the metamorphosis of Achro who's breaking out of their hard shell and is evolving into Achro 2.0!!!
Or something like that.
Anyways I like it, it's more grounded yet still just as mysterious.
<3 thank you!!
i did want a sense of metamorphosis, but im conflicted-- as much as self-expression is nice, i also would rather be at least a little inconspicuous when i can. i dont exactly like being visible to anyone and everyone in this way, which may just be more a matter of not wanting to be vulnerably attached to how my appearance represents me to others and therefore affects/informs a given person's interactions with me under a potential bias according to what they might infer from how i express myself
...but oh how i wish i could depict the blurry plurality of different little compartments which all compose a mosaic of who i am-- to be soft would be a dream, to have heart would be sweet, but im not quite those things in the ways id want to be and i am more often than not a mixture of all that i do and dont express of myself...
warm and frozen blood,
soft yet hardened hearts,
perceptive minds and hazy minds,
emotionally cathartic yet nondescriptly numb,
something somewhere in between
or maybe its nothing like that at all. i can only wish for something to hold onto and cherish, as i wait for reality to break whatever illusions id hope to keep safe
after all, i harbor neglect and inertia,
obstinance and neurosis, melodrama and insensitivity,
insincerity and vanity, among other things
i cant not expect to be wrong to hope for anything