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Officer, I Can Explain!

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samX500
I am just a collector, here are my permits.

A pack of TNT.

A remote controlled detonator.

A very detailed map of a nearby museum.
z0z
i'm bring the tnt and detonator to my friend at the museum

!!!:
no car
a suicide bomber's vest
a fuse
Hoshimegu Mio
Hey, officer, this package is for you!

An unconscious child.
A bottle of alcoholics.
A price tag of that particular child.
Meguro
uhhh, i'm trying to trick you into thinking I'm selling this kid

Cat
Fish
More Cat
Hoshimegu Mio
Meow! They are all my cats!

A portal gun.
GlaDOS.
A heart cube.
Meguro
uhhh, I'm trying to sling myself to black mesa to kill them with my companion cube, they stole GlaDOS source code,

HEV Suit
Weapon
A pair of glasses
Hoshimegu Mio
It's for a Half-life fan play.

A physics engine abuser.
A tree.
A block.
Meguro
hey, uhhh, I'm Gordon Freeman

a VR headset
a copy of Minecraft
a PC
Nuuskamuikkunen
I'm steve.


A broken screen.
A Failed menu.
A gun.
Hoshimegu Mio
Someone shot their screen after failing. Not my problem. Don't you worry, he'll be at hell soon.

A bag of homework.
A bag of homework.
A bag of dynamite.
Corne2Plum3
gonna explode my homeworks.

---

All moderators of osu! but tied up.
A lot of guns.
Money.
Meguro
i'm trying to become the god of osu!

---

cat
cat
cat
furry hater
I'm adopting them, are you fucking sick in the head?! They were in a alley with no food.

---

Tea bags

A ridiculous amount of fursuits, all burned

Gaming PC that is the same cost of the fursuits
z0z
i got paid one of the best pcs in the world and a huge amount of tea for helping someone hide the evidence from their mom


:
no car
on the sidewalk
something that ever so slightly looks suspicious
Hoshimegu Mio
Guess what, I got z0z's horns!

A circle.
A beat.
osu!.
Corne2Plum3
I'm playing osu!

A cube
A spike
An orb
Hoshimegu Mio
I'm playing Geometry Dash.

Black Blizzard.
Sunset Sandstorm.
A cube.
furry hater
Get the fuck out I'm playing Geometry Dash

----

Pizza Boxes

A failed human and cat embryo

iPod
z0z
that's my ipod, someone wanted a pizza that looked exactly like a failed human and cat embryo for some reason and i'm delivering it to them

extra large uncovered cake
unsecured child seat with a child in the back
half the windows are covered
Hoshimegu Mio
That's my little brother. I son't know how he figured to do that but I thought it'll be hreat to block some of the sun out. Sadly, he isn't a catboy.

WAVE.
MINI WAVE.
VSC.
furry hater
Are you ok officer? I'm playing a videogame and you think that it is illegal!


Radio playing this song
The president of the USA.
Some big ass meal from McDonalds with a free knife
Jonarwhal
nothing to see here, the president just invited me on a playdate and this is what he wanted to do
just normal presidential stuff
he likes mcdonalds and has good taste in music, the best taste in music actually

-an illegal cd of africa by toto on repeat for 10 hours
-an illegal cd of harumachi clover on repeat for 10 hours
-an illegal cd of the space jam theme on repeat for 10 hours
Hoshimegu Mio
You own these, officer. Don't you try it.

Pikachu in a cage.
An arrow trap.
An explosives trap.
Nuuskamuikkunen
The only way I can take that pikachu out is by throwing arrows to some explosives.


Diamonds that aren't yours with your fingerprints.
A jewelry shop with broken windows.
A hammer with your fingerprints as well.
Corne2Plum3
One of my wheel exploded and I finishes in the jewelry shop...
For the hammer, this is the hammer I hide in my car for a special moment...

A demon
A huge book about black magic
A red marker
Hoshimegu Mio
How many times do I have to tell you that these are my food / henchman? Don't believe it? OK. *Muscles tearing noises* Meow, that's good! Also, I'm trying to finish my black magic course so get away.

A Goomba.
Mario.
A brick.
Jonarwhal
nothing to see here
Mario: don't a-listen! Im a-being kidnapped!

some funyuns
an echidna
a fox cub
Hoshimegu Mio
I'm feeding this cute little fox. He is Zel's son!
Corne2Plum3
Why you talk to me but I have nothing.

$20,000,000 in money
A TNT
Something to open doors without key
Hoshimegu Mio
It's delivery for you, officer!

Nothing but a cardboard box filled with explosives.
Corne2Plum3
Free ticket for the last Michael Bay movie.

A waifu
A catgirl
A anime girl pillow
Hoshimegu Mio
Meow! Get out! Purr~

Fish
Grass
Dogs
JustABeginner
The fish and the dogs are my pets.
The grass is for decomposing.
---
What's With The:
- Love Letter
- A bouquet of flowers
- A suit/dress
Nuuskamuikkunen
Oh. Of course, these are mine. Who is the fortunate one? Secret~

------------

A voodoo doll.
Needles.
Hair samples of all denizens.
z0z
i'm doing a science experiment where i test if i can identify what denizen hair belongs to which denizen which needs needles
the voodoo doll doesn't work

you have:
a lighter
a suspicious looking box
no car, you're just walking on the street
Corne2Plum3
It's just my food for 12PM.

Weed
Alcohol
Illegad drugs
Nuuskamuikkunen
Weed? That's common hemp, learn to differentiate.
Alcohol? Rubbing alcohol of course, as you can see, it's burning.
The illegal drugs are burning with the alcohol too. I planned to destroy them as these over the counter drugs were no longer allowed to be sold.

A dead kitten.
A knife with blood.
A shovel.
JustABeginner
Sheesh. This game.

I'm burying my old kitten. THe knife is actually from a cake, it's not blood.
---
What's With The:
- Car
- A dead person
- Tape
Nuuskamuikkunen
It's dead, yes.

DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT GOING TO THE AMUSEMENT PARK! That's why the car is there. The tape is for recording the adventures we'll have together.

A love letter to you from subject A asking for a date and killing subject B.
A love letter to you from subject B asking for a date and killing subject A.
A machine gun.
Castagne
Sir officer, you're seeing this completely wrong! Reality is a lie and that's why these two love letters ended up in the back of my car. Instead of blessing me with useful things like cabbages or gnomes, I got delivered two scraps of paper that seem to refer to an alternate dimension where people cannot meet and therefore beg others to reincarnate. In one of my many travels I came over to the continent of Obololululo where there lived the four-eyed monster Bert who wished for his soulmate Brian to be killed in order for Brian to reincarnate into Obololululo so that they can live together. Brian didn't know about Bert's plans so he begged me separately to kill Bert in order for him to reincarnate to Kahehoohe where Brian lived. In both dimensions it's a common courtesy to address someone as a lover when you request them something.

The machine gun is there because I have a hobby in guns and I have a gun permit.

What are you going to do when you're arrested and in the trunk of your car is:
- A kite
- Walnuts (7 kg of them, to be precise)
- The entire state of Bolivia
furry hater
Sir, this is a picture of Bolivia that was custom made that I made with a bunch walnuts. I still didn't finish but I started to kite recently.

- A bulk of RTX 3090 Tis
- Genetically Engineered Furry
- 2176 Sealed Vinyls
Corne2Plum3
Just mining Bitcoins with my furry mate, while listening his vinyls collection.

Female hot furry
A bed
A camera
JustABeginner
Just a reminder, not into her. We are tired after a long trip taking photos for our group project.

---

What's With The:
- Drill.
- A pen tablet.
- Spinner approaching in osu!
Farfocele
the drill is to drill through the wall to insert my new TV, and my tablet and pen is for osu! gameplay, and to spin the approaching spinner at 300 rpm.

A bloodied knife
A body of a top tetris player
A computer
Patatitta
the knife is tainted on tomato sauce, I was cooking earlier, the body is an art piece I need to present to art school, and that's my personal computer


two grenades
suicide note
Farfocele
I am driving to the police, the suicide note and grenades were of an attempted suicide of someone else, and i am trying to report it and get them help!

USB with osu! hacks
real login credentials to 8 multiaccounts
a copy of polybius
JustABeginner
I need to tell peppy that these are the proves that we need to be more concerned about cheaters.
Also, playing polybius in an arcade.

---

What's With The:
- TikTok.
- A real person taped on the middle of the road helplessly struggling.
- Your car.
179bpm
it was for the views

why is there a:
anime body pillow with blood stains on the ground
knife in your hand
mysterious luggage at the bottom of that lake over there
(i made a new thread of this game
community/forums/topics/1685289?n=1)
Stomiks
Officer I can explain! It's the anime pillow's fault! She killed that woman!

There's mutliple hard drives of pirated content on your computer
And you're using a vpn to access north korea. Can you explain yourself?
Taj
officer I have acquaintances that are trapped in North Korea and I am accessing North Korean services to contact them and send them care packages that are actually copies of The Room in disguise

Swiss Navy lube
a scrapbook of every Pope that's ever been appointed
Vicks VaporRub

edit: oh shit I didn't read the limit of items
Farfocele
just let this thread die if someone else made a new one, even if necroing in forum gakes doesn't usually result in any punishment
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