it could be from a mix of things like a semantic ambiguity/misunderstanding that reaches across attention problems, poor sociability, and other maladaptive behaviors... maybe...

- i am very forgetful, so i have issues with recalling good information even when it's related to an interest im very passionate about-- which could be argued as making me less monotropic? i have the same problem with things outside my interests, it's not as bad if i'm interested but it isnt reliably much better either

- i don't create any distinctly structured routines... i just loop back to things non-periodically once im distracted by my own thoughts enough to revert to familiar patterns or once i want to retreat into something to cope with something else. i cant really rely on structure and i am horrible at creating it because i never follow it, but i seem to like it if someone else creates it for me and physically forces me into it

- i was stronger in repetitive thought-loops... i find myself paralyzed and summarizing mysteries/problems into the same questions and familiar patterns of exploring/interrogating my own perspective, i also don't have many life experiences so there isn't really much new to think about that i wouldn't just summarize into a general curiosity. i am very very prone to ruminating on things and will continuously just keep going until i completely exhaust myself because nothing else really can take me out of those thoughts unless im done with them or someone interrupts with enough forceful urgency to disruptively shock me into doing something else but i still kinda linger on it while i try to do those new tasks

+ i have fairly high anxiety about most kinds of socialization... being on this forum is somewhere in the lower-middle range of that anxiety scale, and it helps that i don't really have to engage with anything. unfortunately i'm sorta impulsive about some things so i put myself in positions to be anxious about anyway before i think it through. irl im even worse, i think we answered similarly-- it's impossible to look people in the eye and we would avoid conversations altogether, although i find it maybe more physically uncomfortable because looking at someone's expressions and seeing them see me overloads my brain a little and stops me from thinking clearly even with minimal anxiety, its not looking at people that hurts but the inability to think while i talk that hurts (and my speaking ability is already terrible and scatterbrained enough as it is), but looking at them look at me is still an anxiety thing. this is part of why i doubt my result a bit, i think it's weighted more toward poor social traits for things that could plausibly just be explained as social awkwardness

+ certainty, im usually very fixated on being certain before doing anything... i'm very risk-averse, so if i cant know what will happen i just avoid deciding altogether and that often sabotages my life a little. i avoid being in positions that create the opportunity to be wrong/mistaken in some consequential way (basically, any places where a decision matters and changes something significantly), which means i'm super obstinate and stubborn about really pointlessly dumb things that dont matter to most people or about things that should be obviously practical to others but are not obvious/convincing for me

- related to the end of the previous point, that does also represent me answering strongly for being distressed by things people think are trivial... i seem to be more sensitive than im aware of, and i just tend to numb it or regulate it vigilantly if i understand what to do with it. i dont really know what this has to do with monotropism though-- except it does make sense for some subjects that im interested in, its just... complicated...

- i mean more than i say largely because i want to say so much but cant quite understand how to articulate it all