Hello there!
I saw this beatmap from a queue. and from what i saw. it looks like you use japanese language when replying mods so if you are confused over what i said, feel free to pm me!
Prologue
00:24:162 - 00:26:689 - i think they are a bit unnecessary because there are no sound of drums on that timeline. should've just delete them refering to 00:24:162 - its way more understandable because the song doesnt justify a circle to be there
00:32:294 (9,10) - you dont need these objects. because it held no sounds on it. you can delete this 00:32:294 (9) - and then add a circle on this timeline 00:32:452 - because the piano starts there and its more comprehensible if you map it that way
00:46:741 (5,1) - weird rhythm here. it seems like you are following the vocals here. but the vocals held on this timeline 00:46:741 - so the 1/1 slider should start there instead. also its a nice way to prioritize the loud piano aswell
01:04:899 (1,2) - how about deleting these objects. they doesnt prioratize any important sound on the song. its better if you just delete them so that the next patterns here 01:05:215 (3,4,5,6) - could prioritize the new vocals
01:13:425 (1,2,3,4,5) - you oversimplified these rhythms. its pretty boring while it is being a transition between the previous part and the kiai time so you want to create a huge build up instead rather than only 1/1 circles or sliders. maybe try this kind of rhtyhm instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/OH3tEeWv
01:16:267 (2,3,4) - same here. you could try this instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/pTLN0rrE
01:53:215 (1,2) - odd rhythm where you prioritized instrument and vocals un-effetively. you can ctrl-g that rhythm so that you can prioritize a vocal 01:53:215 - with a 1/2 slider and a drum crash on 01:53:531 -
02:05:531 (3) - this slider is too fast, because the previous slider is 0.4x sv. it will create an unpleasent movement on the slider. maybe try 0.8x slider velocity. feels better in my opinion
02:33:636 (1) - i dont think that you really need a whistle on this 1/8 reverse. its really loud at the first glance imo @@
04:04:583 - isnt it better if a 1/4 reverses starts there so you can emphasize that string instrument. its kinda look like this https://europe.s-ul.eu/7CGg55Rg its also a nice way to differentiate a new guitar pitch on 04:05:215 -
04:28:899 (3) - weird slider shape here. you dont really need the second red anchor https://europe.s-ul.eu/b4E1r73T
04:33:952 (2) - how about overmapping that slider into a 1/2 slider + a circle so you can emphasize the new vocal syllable there
00:12:794 (1,2,3) - visual spacing on these objects are randomly getting tiny comparing to 00:11:531 (1,3) - . try this https://europe.s-ul.eu/6XUGNPUW
01:25:110 - 01:27:636 - 01:35:215 - 01:37:741 - these weird pauses is really odd atm. it causes the first kiai to become weak comparing to the second kiai where things becomes really really hard. consider adding a circle on those pauses and also increasing overall density on the first kiai so it matches tensity with the second kiai. seems like you keep adding these weird 1/1 sliders while you can just make 1/2 + a circle or just go full out spamming jumps for more density for that part
02:00:794 (5,1) - perfectly stacking these sliders feels really unexpected. you doesnt seem to have this kind of stacking idea on your map so its better if you just dont stack at all
01:48:478 (4,5,6,7,1,2,3,4,5) - this looks really messy. you can clean it up a bit by not overlapping the patterns. would look more appealing
02:48:004 (1,1) - the emphasis is on red tick but there is a huge jumps onto the downbeat. the red tick should have bigger spacing judging by the song structure. also the first nc is unnecessary. remove the first nc
03:10:110 (5,6,1) - wide angle feels really random here. you keep maintaining sharp angles throughout the whole map. so using wide angle randomly isnt really consisntent imo. should be something like this https://europe.s-ul.eu/SNx77LwQ
04:40:583 - starting from there. the kiai density drops like crazy because on the previous part. you always use highly spaced jumps and its suddenly drop into a low spaced extended sliders. you can nerf the part starting from here 04:35:531 - . as you can see they have larger spacing and it would be better if you match both part with the same density. or either increasing density on the second part, changing those extended sliders into a bunch of circles + sliders
03:45:004 - this one is really boring imo. the part where you only did slider circle circle, slider circle circle, over and over for like 10 seconds. that part needs some diversity so it feels way more fun and challenging.examples :03:47:215 - add a 1/2 slider there, 03:49:425 (4,5) - change these objects into all circle for jumpy movements and so on.
00:49:346 (3,1) - i think its 1/8 not 1/4 atm
00:54:952 (4,6,8) - these overlaps is a bit messy imo. keep your overlapping consistent so the visual will look nicer. try this instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/7mbnHpNl
00:59:057 - this red tick isnt really clickable since there are no important sound on it. you should map the white tick instead because it helds more prominant sound and will be better if it was clickable. simply, ctrl g that rhythm
01:06:320 (2,3,5) - objects have a whistle on the slider slide. its really loud and random. remove them instead for consistency
good luck on ranking this one!
I saw this beatmap from a queue. and from what i saw. it looks like you use japanese language when replying mods so if you are confused over what i said, feel free to pm me!
- General
- Slider Velocity and overall rhythms is too dense for the intro. sometimes simplifying rhtyhms is a good choice when mapping calmer intro. from what ive been observed here, you keep mixing between layers piano and vocals. meanwhile only focusing on one layers is more ideal for the intros. you've been following vocals and from that you should keep the focus on vocals instead of mixing in between. something like this 00:10:741 (3,4,5,6,7) - shouldnt even exist because they are too dense for being on the intro, using this instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/fx9N9yiR would prioritize the vocals more because thats what you've been following. there are also examples of un-needed rhythms such as 00:14:846 (2,3,4) - should just delete them and start a 1/2 slider on 00:15:004 -
- 60% volume on kiai time is pretty weak. kiai should have more intense elements. so you could try increasing volume to 70%-ish on all kiai time
- can you provide a metadata that justified that english title. i couldnt find it anywhere. i only see sites with the japanese title https://www.melonbooks.co.jp/detail/det ... _id=160040 http://imy-rayofhope.tumblr.com/ https://europe.s-ul.eu/hWznLZxe dont you think title should be "Tsuioku no Kakera" instead?
00:24:162 - 00:26:689 - i think they are a bit unnecessary because there are no sound of drums on that timeline. should've just delete them refering to 00:24:162 - its way more understandable because the song doesnt justify a circle to be there
00:32:294 (9,10) - you dont need these objects. because it held no sounds on it. you can delete this 00:32:294 (9) - and then add a circle on this timeline 00:32:452 - because the piano starts there and its more comprehensible if you map it that way
00:46:741 (5,1) - weird rhythm here. it seems like you are following the vocals here. but the vocals held on this timeline 00:46:741 - so the 1/1 slider should start there instead. also its a nice way to prioritize the loud piano aswell
01:04:899 (1,2) - how about deleting these objects. they doesnt prioratize any important sound on the song. its better if you just delete them so that the next patterns here 01:05:215 (3,4,5,6) - could prioritize the new vocals
01:13:425 (1,2,3,4,5) - you oversimplified these rhythms. its pretty boring while it is being a transition between the previous part and the kiai time so you want to create a huge build up instead rather than only 1/1 circles or sliders. maybe try this kind of rhtyhm instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/OH3tEeWv
01:16:267 (2,3,4) - same here. you could try this instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/pTLN0rrE
01:53:215 (1,2) - odd rhythm where you prioritized instrument and vocals un-effetively. you can ctrl-g that rhythm so that you can prioritize a vocal 01:53:215 - with a 1/2 slider and a drum crash on 01:53:531 -
02:05:531 (3) - this slider is too fast, because the previous slider is 0.4x sv. it will create an unpleasent movement on the slider. maybe try 0.8x slider velocity. feels better in my opinion
02:33:636 (1) - i dont think that you really need a whistle on this 1/8 reverse. its really loud at the first glance imo @@
04:04:583 - isnt it better if a 1/4 reverses starts there so you can emphasize that string instrument. its kinda look like this https://europe.s-ul.eu/7CGg55Rg its also a nice way to differentiate a new guitar pitch on 04:05:215 -
04:28:899 (3) - weird slider shape here. you dont really need the second red anchor https://europe.s-ul.eu/b4E1r73T
04:33:952 (2) - how about overmapping that slider into a 1/2 slider + a circle so you can emphasize the new vocal syllable there
00:12:794 (1,2,3) - visual spacing on these objects are randomly getting tiny comparing to 00:11:531 (1,3) - . try this https://europe.s-ul.eu/6XUGNPUW
01:25:110 - 01:27:636 - 01:35:215 - 01:37:741 - these weird pauses is really odd atm. it causes the first kiai to become weak comparing to the second kiai where things becomes really really hard. consider adding a circle on those pauses and also increasing overall density on the first kiai so it matches tensity with the second kiai. seems like you keep adding these weird 1/1 sliders while you can just make 1/2 + a circle or just go full out spamming jumps for more density for that part
02:00:794 (5,1) - perfectly stacking these sliders feels really unexpected. you doesnt seem to have this kind of stacking idea on your map so its better if you just dont stack at all
01:48:478 (4,5,6,7,1,2,3,4,5) - this looks really messy. you can clean it up a bit by not overlapping the patterns. would look more appealing
02:48:004 (1,1) - the emphasis is on red tick but there is a huge jumps onto the downbeat. the red tick should have bigger spacing judging by the song structure. also the first nc is unnecessary. remove the first nc
03:10:110 (5,6,1) - wide angle feels really random here. you keep maintaining sharp angles throughout the whole map. so using wide angle randomly isnt really consisntent imo. should be something like this https://europe.s-ul.eu/SNx77LwQ
04:40:583 - starting from there. the kiai density drops like crazy because on the previous part. you always use highly spaced jumps and its suddenly drop into a low spaced extended sliders. you can nerf the part starting from here 04:35:531 - . as you can see they have larger spacing and it would be better if you match both part with the same density. or either increasing density on the second part, changing those extended sliders into a bunch of circles + sliders
03:45:004 - this one is really boring imo. the part where you only did slider circle circle, slider circle circle, over and over for like 10 seconds. that part needs some diversity so it feels way more fun and challenging.examples :03:47:215 - add a 1/2 slider there, 03:49:425 (4,5) - change these objects into all circle for jumpy movements and so on.
00:49:346 (3,1) - i think its 1/8 not 1/4 atm
00:54:952 (4,6,8) - these overlaps is a bit messy imo. keep your overlapping consistent so the visual will look nicer. try this instead https://europe.s-ul.eu/7mbnHpNl
00:59:057 - this red tick isnt really clickable since there are no important sound on it. you should map the white tick instead because it helds more prominant sound and will be better if it was clickable. simply, ctrl g that rhythm
01:06:320 (2,3,5) - objects have a whistle on the slider slide. its really loud and random. remove them instead for consistency
good luck on ranking this one!