because mfs here never have the balls to actually make a high quality thread and only ever say "COME FUCKING ON GUYS!! MAKE HIGH QUALITY THREAD!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH!!!!!" allow me to show you how to play the big black stick of doom, the mothafuckin clarinet.
BLA BLA BLA DISCLAIMER
the clarinet being used here is a yamaha clarinet. i'm not 100% sure if what i'm about to say applies to all clarinets, but if memory is nice to me, i reckon most things will apply to other models of clarinet other than yamaha. so don't be stressed if you don't have the exact same model of clarinet as me. also, beforehand, buy some reeds with your clarinet
part 1: introduction
before you even open your clarinet, there is one important thing you should do.
make sure the clarinet brand logo is facing you, not the floor. allow the images to demonstrate (ignore how garbage they look, its because osu wouldnt allow the full image so compression saved me)
ok you got that? ok go ahead, open it
ok so i know shit looks pretty intimidating, but just listen to me for now. before you even assemble the clarinet, get some cork grease and just put it all over the corks. don't use oil or lotion or whatever, that'll fuck it up. just use your cork grease. don't know where to put your cork grease? well, on the cork dumbass. but its ok, just a bit of cork grease and put it all over the parts highlighted in green. surely you can do that for me?
ok, so you have the cork grease on the corks, i think you're ready to go! we can start assembling the clarinet now!!! since it'd be pretty fucking hard to explain all the parts, im just gonna number them for you. now before you even start putting the clarinet together, grab one of your reeds, and put the thin part in your mouth. be careful, you dont want it to break. reeds are very very fragile. if you kill one, you'll have to throw it away so.. yeah
this is a reed btw
anyways.. fuck.. oh yea helping you build the clarinet. ok i got u dw
ok, to begin, make sure you have your reed in your mouth, lightly sucking on it. ok, it's there? good. ok so start by taking part 1, and put the cork side of part 3 into the smaller hole of part 1. you should have something like this
good work friend! ok now take part 4 and put the bit where it kinda sticks out into the remaining hole of part 3.
you're doing excellent. now i want you to take part 2 and put the fat side into the remaining hole of part 4.
wow, you're doing better than i expected! ok, now this is where it might get a bit tricky. take part 5. you'll notice a small metal thing around it. this is called part 6. we need to take off part 6, to do this just wind down the little circles clockwise. be careful you dont wind too much otherwise the screws will come off and it'll be a bit hard to fix. once you seperate part 6 from part 5, we can go on to the next step. remember the reed you had in your mouth? take him out. you want to try to align the reed with the top of the hole in part 5. use the image for demonstration
once you have the reed aligned, take part 6 and screw it back on to part 5. make sure to be careful and align part 6 with part 5. this is easier if you have the same model of clarinet as me, on the back of part 5 there's the yamaha logo and you just have to align part 6 with the logo.
ok now just put your part 5 + 6 combination thing and place it in the remaining hole of part two. make sure that the reed is facing you. congrats, you now have assembled your clarinet!!
ok so you now have a whole instrument, you probably wanna play it.. soo lets get on to that
part 2: playing your instrument
there's a specific way you have to hold the clarinet. it's kinda hard for me to explain so just do what my hands are doing. make sure your fingers sit comfortable on the little buttons
ok so in order to start playing the clarinet, you have to put your mouth in a weird sorta shape. start by putting your bottom lip over your bottom line of teeth.
then have the clarinet's reed (the wood that should be facing you) over your bottom lip which is over your bottom line of teeth. now just put your top line of teeth on top of the clarinet wherever it feels comfortable. now just try blowing.
part 3: notes and stuff
just google "clarinet fingering chart" to figure out how to play all the notes.. or just buy "learn as you play clarinet" and learn how to play specific notes from there. i will give you a hint though, no fingers is a G.
part 4: closing
is this the "quality thread" you've all been craving for so long? is this it? well what fucking ever enjoy trying to play your clarinet
BLA BLA BLA DISCLAIMER
the clarinet being used here is a yamaha clarinet. i'm not 100% sure if what i'm about to say applies to all clarinets, but if memory is nice to me, i reckon most things will apply to other models of clarinet other than yamaha. so don't be stressed if you don't have the exact same model of clarinet as me. also, beforehand, buy some reeds with your clarinet
part 1: introduction
before you even open your clarinet, there is one important thing you should do.
make sure the clarinet brand logo is facing you, not the floor. allow the images to demonstrate (ignore how garbage they look, its because osu wouldnt allow the full image so compression saved me)
ok you got that? ok go ahead, open it
ok so i know shit looks pretty intimidating, but just listen to me for now. before you even assemble the clarinet, get some cork grease and just put it all over the corks. don't use oil or lotion or whatever, that'll fuck it up. just use your cork grease. don't know where to put your cork grease? well, on the cork dumbass. but its ok, just a bit of cork grease and put it all over the parts highlighted in green. surely you can do that for me?
ok, so you have the cork grease on the corks, i think you're ready to go! we can start assembling the clarinet now!!! since it'd be pretty fucking hard to explain all the parts, im just gonna number them for you. now before you even start putting the clarinet together, grab one of your reeds, and put the thin part in your mouth. be careful, you dont want it to break. reeds are very very fragile. if you kill one, you'll have to throw it away so.. yeah
this is a reed btw
anyways.. fuck.. oh yea helping you build the clarinet. ok i got u dw
ok, to begin, make sure you have your reed in your mouth, lightly sucking on it. ok, it's there? good. ok so start by taking part 1, and put the cork side of part 3 into the smaller hole of part 1. you should have something like this
good work friend! ok now take part 4 and put the bit where it kinda sticks out into the remaining hole of part 3.
you're doing excellent. now i want you to take part 2 and put the fat side into the remaining hole of part 4.
wow, you're doing better than i expected! ok, now this is where it might get a bit tricky. take part 5. you'll notice a small metal thing around it. this is called part 6. we need to take off part 6, to do this just wind down the little circles clockwise. be careful you dont wind too much otherwise the screws will come off and it'll be a bit hard to fix. once you seperate part 6 from part 5, we can go on to the next step. remember the reed you had in your mouth? take him out. you want to try to align the reed with the top of the hole in part 5. use the image for demonstration
once you have the reed aligned, take part 6 and screw it back on to part 5. make sure to be careful and align part 6 with part 5. this is easier if you have the same model of clarinet as me, on the back of part 5 there's the yamaha logo and you just have to align part 6 with the logo.
ok now just put your part 5 + 6 combination thing and place it in the remaining hole of part two. make sure that the reed is facing you. congrats, you now have assembled your clarinet!!
ok so you now have a whole instrument, you probably wanna play it.. soo lets get on to that
part 2: playing your instrument
there's a specific way you have to hold the clarinet. it's kinda hard for me to explain so just do what my hands are doing. make sure your fingers sit comfortable on the little buttons
ok so in order to start playing the clarinet, you have to put your mouth in a weird sorta shape. start by putting your bottom lip over your bottom line of teeth.
then have the clarinet's reed (the wood that should be facing you) over your bottom lip which is over your bottom line of teeth. now just put your top line of teeth on top of the clarinet wherever it feels comfortable. now just try blowing.
part 3: notes and stuff
just google "clarinet fingering chart" to figure out how to play all the notes.. or just buy "learn as you play clarinet" and learn how to play specific notes from there. i will give you a hint though, no fingers is a G.
part 4: closing
is this the "quality thread" you've all been craving for so long? is this it? well what fucking ever enjoy trying to play your clarinet
