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Corrupt a wish!

posted
Total Posts
4,839
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Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
granted, but the bug is fixed soon after and it turns your SSS play to a 0% F.

I wish I had the willpower to do shit instead of whining about it and hoping I complete things.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
I grant you the willpower. But you must whine and hope you complete things with that willpower.
J25_games
41 posts
Joined January 2017
J25_games
I wish I can have the power to turn anything into a computer
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but now you live in a world full of self-conscious robots that are set to dominate the world for a complete world, and you're the first victim on their hitlist.

edit: i wish i clicked good
Last edited by keremaru , edited 1 time in total.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Wish granted.But you can only click good with your foot.

I wish to be a great guy.
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but now every waifu, real or not, is killing each other for your "great guy"-ness.
i wish i actually played taiko good.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But you're forced to use heavy drumsticks that makes you extremely tired.

I wish to be better a socializing with random people.
Last edited by Bloom , edited 1 time in total.
DJ Enetro
88 posts
Joined January 2017
DJ Enetro
Granted, those random people are tsundere girls.

I wish that kere got his new laptop as soon as he can so he can play League of Legends
Penguin
323 posts
Joined August 2013
Penguin
granted, but kere's internet speed falls down to dial up levels, so it takes forever to download and bad ping

I wish gas wasn't so gd expensive
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But you will have to pump it out and refine it yourself.

I wish I had better looking gloves.
J25_games
41 posts
Joined January 2017
J25_games
Granted, But one of your gloves you have to find for 30 minutes everytime you use them and some of the finger tips are gone

I wish I wasn't invisable
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
granted, you're no longer invisabel, but you become invisible.



i wish for high healthspan.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. You now have a high healthspan, but the damage you receive from the environment is increased tenfold.

I wish to have a great reaction time.
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but now you can't tolerate video reactions and break your viewing device almost immediately.
i wish i didn't choke on everything
J25_games
41 posts
Joined January 2017
J25_games
Granted, but every sixth thing that goes into your mouth goes into your nostrils


I wish that i can sing
Last edited by J25_games , edited 1 time in total.
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but your voice is so high that it breaks glass everytime you speak. ouch.
i wish i could read ar9 on ctb better
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
granted, but you cant read less than ar8.9 or more than ar9.1

I wish i could stop being an apathetic piece of shit
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but now everyone else is apathetic.
i wish i could play standard.
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
granted, but you wont pass any maps. hey, at least you can play them.

I wish i could stop being a lazy piece of shit.
DJ Enetro
88 posts
Joined January 2017
DJ Enetro
Granted but you have nothing left to do, so you end up bored.

I wish for greater self-control and awareness.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But now you are constantly aware of all your flaws, which in turn makes you hate yourself.

I wish to live in the UK.
Last edited by Bloom , edited 1 time in total.
GSG95
406 posts
Joined October 2014
Topic Starter
GSG95
Granted but you get beat up by chavs.

I wish for a bigger dick.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted, but it is limp.

Wish I could write better code.
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
Granted, but its practicality is next-to-nothing as it will never be used.

I wish for a song I'll enjoy that is reasonably short and is rankable beatmap material.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But from now on, only beatmaps with that song will be ranked.
DJ Enetro
88 posts
Joined January 2017
DJ Enetro
..........

I wish that LumpBloom7 wished for something
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But the wish would be written backwards.

.etar elbatsnu retteb a evah I hsiw I
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, but you get unstable health.



I wish to maga.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But every other country will still be better than it.

I wish to get to lvl 100 in osu!standard.
Last edited by Bloom , edited 1 time in total.
Penguin
323 posts
Joined August 2013
Penguin
Granted, but then you realize levels are meaningless, and that you're barely halfway to level 102.

I wish for a vacation
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But your vacation activities all involve work in a meaningless way..

I wish I could actually remember to make a wish when I post in the thread..
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
Granted, but you'll have to put up with people reminding you to just in case you do forget. Probably a good thing, actually.

I'd wish for better songs, but really, I should just wish for a better sense of urgency.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But your sense of urgency is misapplied and actually annoys people a lot.

I wish that I passed my exams
DJ Enetro
88 posts
Joined January 2017
DJ Enetro
Granted. Passed with minimum pass rate, like D or 3 or something, whatever your grading system is.

I wish for greater focus.
Bloom
26 posts
Joined May 2015
Bloom
Granted. But you focus on the things you don't need to focus on.

I wish that I could read Japanese better.
TTL
130 posts
Joined October 2017
TTL
Granted, but now you can't read your native language and English.

I wish that holidays were infinite.
Penguin
323 posts
Joined August 2013
Penguin
Granted, but you don't have unlimited funds, so you will eventually be stuck homeless where ever you are vacationing.

I wish there was a video streaming service that had every single movie/TV show ever created.
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, they only provide 144p quality



Wish to have someone help me wish for something
Perfection
635 posts
Joined January 2013
Perfection
Granted but they'd only wish for something you don't need

I wish you could eat anything and not gain weight
DJ Enetro
88 posts
Joined January 2017
DJ Enetro
Granted. Your stomach turns into a mini-black hole, and you are never satisfied...

I wish to be friends with TTL.
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
granted, but now they're uncomfortably obsessed with you, and you have no means of escaping. you try to tell people that they're insane, but they shrug it off. and nobody would want to replace ttl as your friend. they wouldn't let anyone, either way.
i wish to be better at dthdhr on standard.
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
Granted. You increase your acc by 0.01% and you're playing Easy diffs.

I wish to get rid of the depressing shit everyone has to put up with in life so they aren't suffering so much and so people can be a little more comfortable.
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
Granted. But things get stagnant since everyone doesn't want to get out of their comfort zone and eventually humanity wiped out because of natural selection.

I want delicious food.
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
Granted. You take a bite of an interesting new food that catches your eyes. It's said to be quite tasty, even addictive, if you have enough of it. You give some of it a try, to find that they were right! It's so amazing, that you devour the rest of it in no time. Yet, your mouth is numb, while your throat and stomach burns. Your eyes water, and a very sharp headache is taking over. You... don't know what's happening, it... you feel... nothing. Nothing, but the void.

- - -

I'd like to make some music and art that I'm proud of.
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted but it gets destroyed just after being finished

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I wish to be good at something
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted. You are only good with one thing in your life: relying on other people

I wish for infinite wishes
Last edited by AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH , edited 1 time in total.
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia
Granted -- but the implications of such a wish causes the wish-granter to prefer to invalidate all wishes.

- - -

I wish for nothing.
Minion24
383 posts
Joined April 2017
Minion24
Granted -- but the wish doesn't work

---

i wish for a house
Achromalia
347 posts
Joined November 2016
Achromalia

Minion24 wrote:

Granted -- but the wish doesn't work
- - -

i wish for a cookiecutterwishresponse
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted.

(Tbh, u should have seen this coming lmao)

I wish for infinite genies that grant me infinite wishes
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted but now you're one of them.


I wish to have a lot of cash.
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
Granted, but your country's currency value is dropping a lot due to hyperinflation so you can only buy a pack of toilet tissue woth your cash.

I wish anime is real.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted. It is called live-action adaptation

I wish for someone to butter my bread and call me a biscuit
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, but now you're a literal biscuit and got eaten by that person. They also eats your buttered bread.

I wish for a bus to hit me.
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, the bus driver gets arrested and now his family will be starved

I wish for the world to become a theme park
Nate Bait
156 posts
Joined April 2017
Nate Bait
Granted, all the rides break down and safety elements break as well

I wish to rank a beatmap
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
Granted. No one plays it though.

I hope people can understand each other.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted, but now people can read what’s on your mind

I wish for my dad to come back
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted, but he tells you he never loved you and then go back.

I wish to be less doubtfull of my actions.
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, but now you've lost the ability to doubt anyone or anything.


I wish you the best. Have a great day!
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted, however they won't have a good day for an entire month.

I wish for the removal of any kind of gun in the world.
Minion24
383 posts
Joined April 2017
Minion24
Granted, but everyone uses swords now

i wish to live in a videogame
Last edited by Minion24 , edited 1 time in total.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted. You got transported to a horror game

I wish for world peace
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
Granted, the world is now peaceful without human.

I wish the color of banana is purple
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted. Banana now will also taste like barney the dinosaur

I wish for rain in CA
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted. Heavy rain will now endlessly fall on CA.

I wish for cheaper food, both on the market and production.
ClevelandsMyBro
880 posts
Joined April 2018
ClevelandsMyBro
Granted. The world is now Venezuela

I wis 4 gud splellling
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
Granted, but now you're also good at spilling

I wish that Tohka Yatogami would sleep beside me every night
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, but that's the only way you'll be able to ever interact with her.
If you try touching or talking to her, she'll disappear forever both in real life and in the fictional world. No one but you will remember her.


I wish for a life time supply of Coca-cola.
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
Ahh, fuck you for that! Of course I'm going to want to talk to her and hug her and fuck her and shit!

Hence, I shall grant that wish, but it will be shipped from India. They make coke out of the precious freshwater sources, leaving less available for the poorer people that just live my drinking water. How do you feel now? You're inadvertently causing the suffering of over a billion people, you know?

I wish that my next date with my girlfriend will go perfectly.
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Wish granted, but after your succesfull date your relationship will spiral down into a series of misunderstanding, fight, doubt and violence. Neither of you will be able to leave everything all behind and you will force yourself to make it work but no matter how hard you try it will still get worse and worse. You will end up having a child, but in the middle of all the fighting, his life is miserable and he shut himself from other forever onward, and ultimately dies meaninglessly as he ages.

I wish to get good grade this semester.
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
How is that humanly possible? I'm literally the worst at everything, then.

Granted, but it was only in one useless subject, P.E., so you're still not going to find a fantastic profession.

I wish sliderbreaks didn't exist
Minion24
383 posts
Joined April 2017
Minion24
granted, but 100s get removed entirely from the game

i wish to be a main character in an anime
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, it's a Junji Ito adaptation.

I wish you good health
pentaqola
43 posts
Joined May 2018
pentaqola
granted! i am in the hospital with good life support

what? i got good life support and am in a hospital... that is good health right?

i wish i am animated
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
Granted. You're now two-dimensional. Have fun trying to do anything.

I wish for a new full-size mechanical keyboard
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, you are now a proud owner of the Wang 725-3488 with tactile Key Tronic foam and foil switches.

I wish for a nice meal.
Minion24
383 posts
Joined April 2017
Minion24
granted, but it will be the only one you'll ever have

i wish to travel somewhere
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Beatmap Nominator
936 posts
Joined April 2016
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Granted. An one-way ticket to hell, passenger you

I wish for wishes
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, wish away to your heart's content. But each wish you make will cause a random person whom you know to die, and no wish shall be able to change that.

I wish for endless suffering.
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
Granted. You are now immortal. Not being able to die would mean your body would always feel pain, and you couldn't stop feeling it no matter what you did.

I wish I was taller. I'm only 184 cm tall.
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
Granted, you're now 15-meter tall, walking around naked with no intelligence and eat humans for fun.

I wish i'm 184 cm tall
pentaqola
43 posts
Joined May 2018
pentaqola
granted! your name now is 184 cm tall

i wish to have the ability to bring my drawings to life
Minion24
383 posts
Joined April 2017
Minion24
granted, but they will try to replace you

i wish for something cool
Last edited by Minion24 , edited 1 time in total.
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted. Now the weather is permanently -50 C everywhere on earth.

I wish for an AI revolution that will replace humanity as a supperior species.
Tad Fibonacci
112 posts
Joined August 2015
Tad Fibonacci
Granted, but then humans revolted against the AIs and won, destroying every single synthetic life forms on earth.


I wish for some Dr. Pepper.
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, you get diabetes after a single can.

I wish to uncorrupt every single wish(including this) in this thread.
pentaqola
43 posts
Joined May 2018
pentaqola
grante-

The requested topic does not exist.

/wish [wish]
Volta
1,622 posts
Joined March 2014
Volta
[/wish]

I wish moderator lock this thread
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
granted, but actually no (hopefully)

i wish for more 300pp plays
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
Granted.
Everyone in the community but you gets more 300pp plays.

I wish I had significantly better aim and rhythm accuracy.
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
granted, but you now have no stamina

i wish for a bar of soap
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted, but it always get's in you eyes when you use it.

I wish to have more time.
keremaru
228 posts
Joined November 2017
keremaru
Granted, but everyone else can't cope with longer days.

I wish for the ability to teleport behind anyone in my line of sight with control.
45Traeath
388 posts
Joined February 2016
45Traeath
Granted but you're already dead?


I wish to know who added me in here.
Tateshina Eve
373 posts
Joined September 2017
Tateshina Eve
Granted, but every day, a random person will subtract you.

(P.S. I haven't, but if you want me to then let me know)

I wish for a shirt with Megumin on it.
Isshiki Kaname
936 posts
Joined May 2014
Isshiki Kaname
Granted, but its of a bad printing quality from a ink transfer paper, so the print will fade completely in 2 washings.

I want Minecraft Java Edition premium.
vinnicci
318 posts
Joined December 2015
vinnicci
Granted, it's max render distance is limited to 4

I wish for a nuclear winter.
samX500
54 posts
Joined January 2018
samX500
Granted, but the radiation gives the power of imortality to you and you alone and you will spend all of eternity in endless suffering and loneliness.

I wish to become a good euphonium player.
Isshiki Kaname
936 posts
Joined May 2014
Isshiki Kaname
Granted, but you have an urge to switch to saxophone because another (very bad) euphonium player annoys you.

I want all annoying songs (like that pancakes one) to cease to exist
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