Granted, but you get unstable health.
I wish to maga.
I wish to maga.
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Corrupt a wish!
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Granted. But every other country will still be better than it.
I wish to get to lvl 100 in osu!standard.
I wish to get to lvl 100 in osu!standard.
Granted, but then you realize levels are meaningless, and that you're barely halfway to level 102.
I wish for a vacation
I wish for a vacation
Granted. But your vacation activities all involve work in a meaningless way..
I wish I could actually remember to make a wish when I post in the thread..
I wish I could actually remember to make a wish when I post in the thread..
Granted, but you'll have to put up with people reminding you to just in case you do forget. Probably a good thing, actually.
I'd wish for better songs, but really, I should just wish for a better sense of urgency.
I'd wish for better songs, but really, I should just wish for a better sense of urgency.
Granted. But your sense of urgency is misapplied and actually annoys people a lot.
I wish that I passed my exams
I wish that I passed my exams
Granted. Passed with minimum pass rate, like D or 3 or something, whatever your grading system is.
I wish for greater focus.
I wish for greater focus.
Granted. But you focus on the things you don't need to focus on.
I wish that I could read Japanese better.
I wish that I could read Japanese better.
Granted, but now you can't read your native language and English.
I wish that holidays were infinite.
I wish that holidays were infinite.
Granted, but you don't have unlimited funds, so you will eventually be stuck homeless where ever you are vacationing.
I wish there was a video streaming service that had every single movie/TV show ever created.
I wish there was a video streaming service that had every single movie/TV show ever created.
Granted, they only provide 144p quality
Wish to have someone help me wish for something
Wish to have someone help me wish for something
Granted but they'd only wish for something you don't need
I wish you could eat anything and not gain weight
I wish you could eat anything and not gain weight
Granted. Your stomach turns into a mini-black hole, and you are never satisfied...
I wish to be friends with TTL.
I wish to be friends with TTL.
granted, but now they're uncomfortably obsessed with you, and you have no means of escaping. you try to tell people that they're insane, but they shrug it off. and nobody would want to replace ttl as your friend. they wouldn't let anyone, either way.
i wish to be better at dthdhr on standard.
i wish to be better at dthdhr on standard.
Granted. You increase your acc by 0.01% and you're playing Easy diffs.
I wish to get rid of the depressing shit everyone has to put up with in life so they aren't suffering so much and so people can be a little more comfortable.
I wish to get rid of the depressing shit everyone has to put up with in life so they aren't suffering so much and so people can be a little more comfortable.
Granted. But things get stagnant since everyone doesn't want to get out of their comfort zone and eventually humanity wiped out because of natural selection.
I want delicious food.
I want delicious food.
Granted. You take a bite of an interesting new food that catches your eyes. It's said to be quite tasty, even addictive, if you have enough of it. You give some of it a try, to find that they were right! It's so amazing, that you devour the rest of it in no time. Yet, your mouth is numb, while your throat and stomach burns. Your eyes water, and a very sharp headache is taking over. You... don't know what's happening, it... you feel... nothing. Nothing, but the void.
- - -
I'd like to make some music and art that I'm proud of.
- - -
I'd like to make some music and art that I'm proud of.
Granted but it gets destroyed just after being finished
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I wish to be good at something
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I wish to be good at something
Granted. You are only good with one thing in your life: relying on other people
I wish for infinite wishes
I wish for infinite wishes
Granted -- but the implications of such a wish causes the wish-granter to prefer to invalidate all wishes.
- - -
I wish for nothing.
- - -
I wish for nothing.
Granted -- but the wish doesn't work
---
i wish for a house
---
i wish for a house
- - -Minion24 wrote:
Granted -- but the wish doesn't work
i wish for a cookiecutterwishresponse
Granted. 
(Tbh, u should have seen this coming lmao)
I wish for infinite genies that grant me infinite wishes
(Tbh, u should have seen this coming lmao)
I wish for infinite genies that grant me infinite wishes
Granted but now you're one of them.
I wish to have a lot of cash.
I wish to have a lot of cash.
Granted, but your country's currency value is dropping a lot due to hyperinflation so you can only buy a pack of toilet tissue woth your cash.
I wish anime is real.
I wish anime is real.
Granted. It is called live-action adaptation
I wish for someone to butter my bread and call me a biscuit
I wish for someone to butter my bread and call me a biscuit
Granted, but now you're a literal biscuit and got eaten by that person. They also eats your buttered bread.
I wish for a bus to hit me.
I wish for a bus to hit me.
Granted, the bus driver gets arrested and now his family will be starved
I wish for the world to become a theme park
I wish for the world to become a theme park
Granted, all the rides break down and safety elements break as well
I wish to rank a beatmap
I wish to rank a beatmap
Granted. No one plays it though.
I hope people can understand each other.
I hope people can understand each other.
Granted, but now people can read what’s on your mind
I wish for my dad to come back
I wish for my dad to come back
Granted, but he tells you he never loved you and then go back.
I wish to be less doubtfull of my actions.
I wish to be less doubtfull of my actions.
Granted, but now you've lost the ability to doubt anyone or anything.
I wish you the best. Have a great day!
I wish you the best. Have a great day!
Granted, however they won't have a good day for an entire month.
I wish for the removal of any kind of gun in the world.
I wish for the removal of any kind of gun in the world.
Granted, but everyone uses swords now
i wish to live in a videogame
i wish to live in a videogame
Granted. You got transported to a horror game
I wish for world peace
I wish for world peace
Granted, the world is now peaceful without human.
I wish the color of banana is purple
I wish the color of banana is purple
Granted. Banana now will also taste like barney the dinosaur
I wish for rain in CA
I wish for rain in CA
Granted. Heavy rain will now endlessly fall on CA.
I wish for cheaper food, both on the market and production.
I wish for cheaper food, both on the market and production.
Granted. The world is now Venezuela
I wis 4 gud splellling
I wis 4 gud splellling
Granted, but now you're also good at spilling
I wish that Tohka Yatogami would sleep beside me every night
I wish that Tohka Yatogami would sleep beside me every night
Granted, but that's the only way you'll be able to ever interact with her.
If you try touching or talking to her, she'll disappear forever both in real life and in the fictional world. No one but you will remember her.
I wish for a life time supply of Coca-cola.
If you try touching or talking to her, she'll disappear forever both in real life and in the fictional world. No one but you will remember her.
I wish for a life time supply of Coca-cola.
Ahh, fuck you for that! Of course I'm going to want to talk to her and hug her and fuck her and shit!
Hence, I shall grant that wish, but it will be shipped from India. They make coke out of the precious freshwater sources, leaving less available for the poorer people that just live my drinking water. How do you feel now? You're inadvertently causing the suffering of over a billion people, you know?
I wish that my next date with my girlfriend will go perfectly.
Hence, I shall grant that wish, but it will be shipped from India. They make coke out of the precious freshwater sources, leaving less available for the poorer people that just live my drinking water. How do you feel now? You're inadvertently causing the suffering of over a billion people, you know?
I wish that my next date with my girlfriend will go perfectly.
Wish granted, but after your succesfull date your relationship will spiral down into a series of misunderstanding, fight, doubt and violence. Neither of you will be able to leave everything all behind and you will force yourself to make it work but no matter how hard you try it will still get worse and worse. You will end up having a child, but in the middle of all the fighting, his life is miserable and he shut himself from other forever onward, and ultimately dies meaninglessly as he ages.
I wish to get good grade this semester.
I wish to get good grade this semester.
How is that humanly possible? I'm literally the worst at everything, then.
Granted, but it was only in one useless subject, P.E., so you're still not going to find a fantastic profession.
I wish sliderbreaks didn't exist
Granted, but it was only in one useless subject, P.E., so you're still not going to find a fantastic profession.
I wish sliderbreaks didn't exist
granted, but 100s get removed entirely from the game
i wish to be a main character in an anime
i wish to be a main character in an anime
Granted, it's a Junji Ito adaptation.
I wish you good health
I wish you good health
granted! i am in the hospital with good life support
what? i got good life support and am in a hospital... that is good health right?
i wish i am animated
what? i got good life support and am in a hospital... that is good health right?
i wish i am animated
Granted. You're now two-dimensional. Have fun trying to do anything.
I wish for a new full-size mechanical keyboard
I wish for a new full-size mechanical keyboard
Granted, you are now a proud owner of the Wang 725-3488 with tactile Key Tronic foam and foil switches.
I wish for a nice meal.
I wish for a nice meal.
granted, but it will be the only one you'll ever have
i wish to travel somewhere
i wish to travel somewhere
Granted. An one-way ticket to hell, passenger you
I wish for wishes
I wish for wishes
Granted, wish away to your heart's content. But each wish you make will cause a random person whom you know to die, and no wish shall be able to change that.
I wish for endless suffering.
I wish for endless suffering.
Granted. You are now immortal. Not being able to die would mean your body would always feel pain, and you couldn't stop feeling it no matter what you did.
I wish I was taller. I'm only 184 cm tall.
I wish I was taller. I'm only 184 cm tall.
Granted, you're now 15-meter tall, walking around naked with no intelligence and eat humans for fun.
I wish i'm 184 cm tall
I wish i'm 184 cm tall
granted! your name now is 184 cm tall
i wish to have the ability to bring my drawings to life
i wish to have the ability to bring my drawings to life
granted, but they will try to replace you
i wish for something cool
i wish for something cool
Granted. Now the weather is permanently -50 C everywhere on earth.
I wish for an AI revolution that will replace humanity as a supperior species.
I wish for an AI revolution that will replace humanity as a supperior species.
Granted, but then humans revolted against the AIs and won, destroying every single synthetic life forms on earth.
I wish for some Dr. Pepper.
I wish for some Dr. Pepper.
Granted, you get diabetes after a single can.
I wish to uncorrupt every single wish(including this) in this thread.
I wish to uncorrupt every single wish(including this) in this thread.
[/wish]
I wish moderator lock this thread
I wish moderator lock this thread
granted, but actually no (hopefully)
i wish for more 300pp plays
i wish for more 300pp plays
Granted.
Everyone in the community but you gets more 300pp plays.
I wish I had significantly better aim and rhythm accuracy.
Everyone in the community but you gets more 300pp plays.
I wish I had significantly better aim and rhythm accuracy.
granted, but you now have no stamina
i wish for a bar of soap
i wish for a bar of soap
Granted, but it always get's in you eyes when you use it.
I wish to have more time.
I wish to have more time.
Granted, but everyone else can't cope with longer days.
I wish for the ability to teleport behind anyone in my line of sight with control.
I wish for the ability to teleport behind anyone in my line of sight with control.
Granted but you're already dead?
I wish to know who added me in here.
I wish to know who added me in here.
Granted, but every day, a random person will subtract you.
(P.S. I haven't, but if you want me to then let me know)
I wish for a shirt with Megumin on it.
(P.S. I haven't, but if you want me to then let me know)
I wish for a shirt with Megumin on it.
Granted, but its of a bad printing quality from a ink transfer paper, so the print will fade completely in 2 washings.
I want Minecraft Java Edition premium.
I want Minecraft Java Edition premium.
Granted, it's max render distance is limited to 4
I wish for a nuclear winter.
I wish for a nuclear winter.
Granted, but the radiation gives the power of imortality to you and you alone and you will spend all of eternity in endless suffering and loneliness.
I wish to become a good euphonium player.
I wish to become a good euphonium player.
Granted, but you have an urge to switch to saxophone because another (very bad) euphonium player annoys you.
I want all annoying songs (like that pancakes one) to cease to exist
I want all annoying songs (like that pancakes one) to cease to exist
Granted, now no songs in the world exists.
I wish the best for the person bellow me.
I wish the best for the person bellow me.
Granted, but the person below me get the worst to balance out the bst that I get.
I wish for organ cloning.
I wish for organ cloning.
Granted, but those are "bad" ones.
"Help, I need somebody
Help, not just anybody
Help, you know I need someone, help"
"Help, I need somebody
Help, not just anybody
Help, you know I need someone, help"
Granted. This person pretends to help you, but he's actually a spy from the opposition in the civil war. He proceeds to kill you afterwards.
I wish for a waifu with the perfect height such that I can plant my face in her chest when I sleep at night.
I wish for a waifu with the perfect height such that I can plant my face in her chest when I sleep at night.
Granted, but she doesn't love you and doesn't let you near her.
I wish to connect my brain to a computer to be able to use any technological device only with the use of my mind.
I wish to connect my brain to a computer to be able to use any technological device only with the use of my mind.
Oh Jesus, you just have to screw up every moment I have, right?! (I know that's the point of this thread. I'm just uhh...)
Granted, but you can't take it off and you die when the computer shuts down.
I wish for some coffee. I have an exam tomorrow.
Granted, but you can't take it off and you die when the computer shuts down.
I wish for some coffee. I have an exam tomorrow.
Granted, but it is decaffeinated
I wish for a healthy lifestyle
I wish for a healthy lifestyle
Granted, but you can no longer eat anything except vegetables daily
I want people to stop calling me hypocrite for liking Eriri
I want people to stop calling me hypocrite for liking Eriri
Granted, but now people just call you a hypocrite for any damn reason other than for liking Eriri.
I wish I weren't an 8-digit again.
I wish I weren't an 8-digit again.
Granted, you are now a 6 digit, not the osu kind, the NH kind.
I wish I can get a good stamina by working hard.
I wish I can get a good stamina by working hard.
Topic Starter
Granted. You worked so hard, you became a corporate cubicle slave without any time for Osu.
I wish, I wish, with all my heart,
For you to spread your legs apart.
I wish, I wish, with all my heart,
For you to spread your legs apart.
owo the thread creator came back for this
Granted. My legs are so stretched I had to amputate them.
I wish for a new analog watch so that I can simultaneously use it as a compass.
Granted. My legs are so stretched I had to amputate them.
I wish for a new analog watch so that I can simultaneously use it as a compass.
Granted, but it doesn't actually tell time, nor tell you which direction is North.
edit: I wish I wasn't demented with PS.
edit: I wish I wasn't demented with PS.
Granted. You now have dementia.
I wish for some love
I wish for some love
Granted, you now have people loving you. However, these people only give you superficial love and once they have earned your trust, they will start to abuse you, asking for tiny bit of money at first, and then some more, and some more until they ahve sucked your wallet dry.
They will make sure you no longer meet any other people, so that the only love you are able to receive is from them. And once they hold a monopoly on your feelings, they will threathen you to cut your source of affection if you refuse to obey them.
They will force you into the darkest area society has to offer, drug, prositution, slavery and you, unable to let go of what you believe is your only source of love, will comply to their every demand.
You will later be arrested and spend the rest of your days in prison, still abiding to their order, as they have gone their along with you.
Sorry Kotori for being so hard on your wish ;__;
I wish to have less imagination when it comes to creating dark stories.
They will make sure you no longer meet any other people, so that the only love you are able to receive is from them. And once they hold a monopoly on your feelings, they will threathen you to cut your source of affection if you refuse to obey them.
They will force you into the darkest area society has to offer, drug, prositution, slavery and you, unable to let go of what you believe is your only source of love, will comply to their every demand.
You will later be arrested and spend the rest of your days in prison, still abiding to their order, as they have gone their along with you.
Sorry Kotori for being so hard on your wish ;__;
I wish to have less imagination when it comes to creating dark stories.
Granted. Oops, I accidentally put in blocks of caesium instead of ice. Your cup breaks from a violent explosion.
I wish for fried chicken from a good fast food restaurant (not something terrible like KFC)
I wish for fried chicken from a good fast food restaurant (not something terrible like KFC)
Granted, you get your fantastic fried chicken from 4Fingers, but the moment you eat it, your tongue swells abnormally, your stomach aches and burns the worst you've ever experienced, your skin feels like it's melting and your intestines feel like they're close to exploding as you realize someone poisoned you.
I wish for a peaceful world.
I wish for a peaceful world.
Is there even 4 fingers outside of Singapore idk
Granted. You're now the only living creature left on Earth. And of course, you'll die eventually since you have nothing to eat.
I wish for a roll of toilet paper
Granted. You're now the only living creature left on Earth. And of course, you'll die eventually since you have nothing to eat.
I wish for a roll of toilet paper
Granted, it is made out of sand paper.
I wish for a good energy recovery ability.
I wish for a good energy recovery ability.
Granted, but you'll never be able to sleep ever again.
I wish for ice cream to eat now.
I wish for ice cream to eat now.
Granted.
The ice cream you wish for is rather foreign, and takes dozens of millennia to craft. As you are only wishing now for ice cream to eat, and not which ice cream to eat, it automatically defaults to the Ice Cream of 100 Generations. Shortly put, from the immediate second you wished for ice cream to eat, you set into motion a catastrophic event for the entire world to suffer through.
The ice cream comes to your home 10 deci-millennia after you've wished for it, where the world is burnt in reaction to the global freezing to generate this ice cream you wished for.
Enjoy.
I wish for less description in my writing.
The ice cream you wish for is rather foreign, and takes dozens of millennia to craft. As you are only wishing now for ice cream to eat, and not which ice cream to eat, it automatically defaults to the Ice Cream of 100 Generations. Shortly put, from the immediate second you wished for ice cream to eat, you set into motion a catastrophic event for the entire world to suffer through.
The ice cream comes to your home 10 deci-millennia after you've wished for it, where the world is burnt in reaction to the global freezing to generate this ice cream you wished for.
Enjoy.
I wish for less description in my writing.
Granted. You can no longer describe anything in your writing, meaning that you can't write anything as the act of writing is in essence the act of describing your thought.
I wish fo enlightement.
I wish fo enlightement.
Granted, now you're a firefly.
I wish whoever's reading this a wonderful day.
I wish whoever's reading this a wonderful day.
Granted, but everyone else will have a hectic day.
I wish for a knife
I wish for a knife
You got a "Nife (Naughy Wife)". Have fun with the yandere side of hers ( '-')b
Although she might stab you right when she isn't in your field of vision.
Make me proud.
Although she might stab you right when she isn't in your field of vision.
Make me proud.
Granted.
You have now been condemned to hell for the sin of pride.
i wish i was good at osu!catch again, while retaining my skill in the other gamemodes
You have now been condemned to hell for the sin of pride.
i wish i was good at osu!catch again, while retaining my skill in the other gamemodes