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Kurosaki Maon - Rakuen no Tsubasa

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Topic Starter
Tari
This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on Thursday, November 13, 2014 at 3:12:23 PM

Artist: Kurosaki Maon
Title: Rakuen no Tsubasa
Source: グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags: opening fruit of loom forbidden Momochikun adaption
BPM: 155
Filesize: 20363kb
Play Time: 01:28
Difficulties Available:
  1. Easy (1.47 stars, 86 notes)
  2. Insane (3.89 stars, 284 notes)
  3. Mochi's Hard (3.12 stars, 238 notes)
  4. Normal (2.04 stars, 152 notes)
Download: Kurosaki Maon - Rakuen no Tsubasa
Download: Kurosaki Maon - Rakuen no Tsubasa (no video)
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
osu! needs more Grisaia!!
video by lust thanks.
Asagi
yes yes!!!
Momochikun
Michiru is the best ww
Umi

Momochikun wrote:

Michiru Amane is the best ww
Gl tari :3/
Shad0w1and
i can provide HD PV for this map
http://pan.baidu.com/s/1pJ0oUYB
Asagi

Umi wrote:

Momochikun wrote:

Michiru Amane Sachi is the best ww
Topic Starter
Tari

Shad0w1and wrote:

i can provide HD PV for this map
http://pan.baidu.com/s/1pJ0oUYB

Thank you but I have a good video already :p
Shad0w1and

Tari wrote:

Shad0w1and wrote:

i can provide HD PV for this map
http://pan.baidu.com/s/1pJ0oUYB

Thank you but I have a good video already :p
just check it out, i just got depressed about some low quality video in osu! i used many filters to ensure the BS source i got from our fansub team been encoded properly.
Gaia

Momochikun wrote:

Michiru is the best ww




star for Michiruuuu !
Karen
M4M
[General]
none

[Easy]

  • 00:35:045 (3) - ends 00:35:045 (3) - better
    01:06:981 (1,2) - improve the blanket
    01:12:981 (1,2) - blanket
    01:24:206 (3,4) - make them parallel better?
    01:24:206 (4,1) - hmm,i think blanket is better
[Normal]

  • 00:40:852 (1,2) - improve the blanket
    00:53:626 (3) - add finish? like u did at 00:52:852 (2) -
    01:14:916 (3,4) - improve the blanket
[Hard]

  • 01:09:690 (3,4,5) - the spacing is different
    00:08:142 (1) - ctrl+G then try this flow?
    00:34:852 (2,3) - try this?maybe it has more fun,and care the blanket with 00:34:271 (5)
    00:38:529 (5) - finish
    00:47:626 (3,4) - try this
    00:52:852 (3,1,2) - improve the blanket
[Insane]

  • 00:21:884 (1) - the slider's tail perfect stack with 00:22:658 (3) - it's head
    00:54:787 (1,2) - stack them well
    01:19:561 (1) - finish?
    01:20:336 (2) - finish?
    00:23:045 (4,5,6,7,1) - try thss flow?if u do this,make00:23:626 (7) perfect stack with00:22:658 (3)

    01:03:884 (1) - [box=]
    try this because the spacing of01:03:690 (4,1) and01:05:239 (5,1) should be the same
    [/box]
That's all!
Good luck
hope it'll be useful for you :)
RandF
hey~

[General]
  1. tags suggetion:
    frontwing
  2. mp3: end too soon. I suggest to add fadeout at outro
[Easy]
  1. 00:00:594 (1,2) - why not make DS 1.0x?
  2. 00:35:819 (4,1) - too near, not good looking. I suggest to curve 00:36:206 (1) -
  3. 00:54:787 (2) - I prefer to curve righetside of slider
  4. 01:06:206- whistle
  5. 01:06:981 (1,2) - how about blanketting?
  6. 01:11:432 (3,4) - check DS
  7. 01:27:206 (1) - I feel too short for easy
[Normal]
  1. 00:34:658 (4,5,6) - suggetion
  2. 00:40:852 (1,2) - blanket correctly
  3. 00:44:916 (3,1) - you can make better flow. I suggest to move 00:45:497 (1) - rightward or rotate clockwise
  4. 00:57:690 (1,2) - this overlapping is not good looking
  5. 01:23:819- follow this strong sound. otherwise, I feel strange...
  6. 01:25:174 (5) - i prefer 1/2 slider not reverse
[Insane]
  1. 00:06:013 (1) - why not end at 00:06:303?
  2. 00:06:594 (3,1) - I prefer to combine into 1 slider
  3. 00:10:271 (2,4) - blanket?
  4. 01:11:239 (5) - rotate anti-clocwise for good flow
  5. 01:18:013 (1) - Ctrl+G
  6. 01:26:336 (4,1,2) - these spacing is so confusing. increase DS of 01:26:723 (1,2) -
[Mochi's Hard]
wow, see you again~
  1. 00:03:690 (3) - move downward for good flow
  2. 00:06:013 (1,2) - u~m, combine into 1 slider?
  3. 00:12:787 (1) - curve leftward a little
  4. 00:52:852 (3,1) - check blanketting
  5. 00:59:239 (1,2) - ^
  6. 01:10:077 (6,1) - swap DS
  7. 01:24:594 (2,4) - move 01:25:368 (4) - downward. hard to play because slider start is almost covered.
  8. 01:27:110- I highly recommend to add a note!
if you OK, M4M please ;)
~Good Luck~
Yumeno Himiko
M4M

[General]
00:00:594 - I guess a red up line is needed here to change the offset, as you see many of the following beats start at the red lines (I don't know if I express it right 0.0 it's the 2nd of the 4/4 beats), even the kiai time starts there. Also this will make the first red line lead the sting music and the second red line lead the drum, which makes sense.
I guess the audio is not cutted well since it ends suddenly (? just my idea.

[Easy]
01:12:594 (4) - guess it has been mentioned by modders above.

00:51:690 (1) - I didn't expected a spin here, I think a long slider will work well w

[Normal]
00:40:852 (1,2) - blanket
00:42:400 (3,4,5) - I guess curves will make these three sliders look nice 01:02:529 (3) - Remove this and add notes on 01:02:336 & 01:02:723 to follow the rhythm patterns, or it will make players feel a bit strange.
01:14:916 (3) - ^

[Mochi's Hard]
00:15:110 (3,4) - I think just a slider is enough~
01:11:626 (1,2) - These 2 sliders should be placed apart or players will be think that 2 is follow 1/4 beats after 1 since it's just after 01:10:658 (1,2)
01:27:110 - A note is needed?

[Insane]
00:07:368 (1,2,3,4,1) - A regular star maybe?
00:28:465 (1,2,3,4,5,1) - A regular hexagon?
00:30:206 (2) - blanket
00:31:561 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - I don't think a stream is rightly placed here, since I can't find sounds at 00:31:658 00:31:852 00:32:045. You can place jumps here.
01:09:497 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - same ^ but you can keep this stream since 00:57:110 (1,2,3,4,5,6) is placed

00:57:110 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - This one is rightly placed cuz it follows the piano


Good Luck~wwww
Momochikun
Topic Starter
Tari
SPOILER

Kagamine Ren wrote:

M4M
[General]
none

[Easy]

  • 00:35:045 (3) - ends 00:35:045 (3) - better ? ending fine., you linked same ending.
    01:06:981 (1,2) - improve the blanket
    01:12:981 (1,2) - blanket
    01:24:206 (3,4) - make them parallel better?
    01:24:206 (4,1) - hmm,i think blanket is better
    some blankets fixed, others because of certain design I want
[Normal]

  • 00:40:852 (1,2) - improve the blanket
    00:53:626 (3) - add finish? like u did at 00:52:852 (2) - loud to me.
    01:14:916 (3,4) - improve the blanket not mean't to blanket e.e
[Hard]

  • 01:09:690 (3,4,5) - the spacing is different
    00:08:142 (1) - ctrl+G then try this flow?
    00:34:852 (2,3) - try this?maybe it has more fun,and care the blanket with 00:34:271 (5)
    00:38:529 (5) - finish
    00:47:626 (3,4) - try this
    00:52:852 (3,1,2) - improve the blanket
[Insane]

  • 00:21:884 (1) - the slider's tail perfect stack with 00:22:658 (3) - it's head intentional to make it more visible.
    00:54:787 (1,2) - stack them well
    01:19:561 (1) - finish? there is finish.
    01:20:336 (2) - finish?
    00:23:045 (4,5,6,7,1) - try thss flow?if u do this,make00:23:626 (7) perfect stack with00:22:658 (3)

    01:03:884 (1) - [box=]
    try this because the spacing of01:03:690 (4,1) and01:05:239 (5,1) should be the same can't see image
    [/box]
That's all!
Good luck
hope it'll be useful for you :)


randomeffect

RandomEffect wrote:

hey~

[General]
  1. tags suggetion:
    frontwing
  2. mp3: end too soon. I suggest to add fadeout at outro
[Easy]
  1. 00:00:594 (1,2) - why not make DS 1.0x? impossible without break symmetry, maybe CTRL+G , but that flow is strange to me.
  2. 00:35:819 (4,1) - too near, not good looking. I suggest to curve 00:36:206 (1) -
  3. 00:54:787 (2) - I prefer to curve righetside of slider i like mines
  4. 01:06:206- whistle
  5. 01:06:981 (1,2) - how about blanketting?
  6. 01:11:432 (3,4) - check DS
  7. 01:27:206 (1) - I feel too short for easy imo its fine.
[Normal]
  1. 00:34:658 (4,5,6) - suggetion the vocals are not shown properly.
  2. 00:40:852 (1,2) - blanket correctly
  3. 00:44:916 (3,1) - you can make better flow. I suggest to move 00:45:497 (1) - rightward or rotate clockwise
  4. 00:57:690 (1,2) - this overlapping is not good looking
  5. 01:23:819- follow this strong sound. otherwise, I feel strange...
  6. 01:25:174 (5) - i prefer 1/2 slider not reverse the violin has many beats..
[Insane]
  1. 00:06:013 (1) - why not end at 00:06:303? music stops quickly.
  2. 00:06:594 (3,1) - I prefer to combine into 1 slider won't fit well with vocals here.
  3. 00:10:271 (2,4) - blanket?
  4. 01:11:239 (5) - rotate anti-clocwise for good flow hmm current is fine imo..
  5. 01:18:013 (1) - Ctrl+G unsure atm
  6. 01:26:336 (4,1,2) - these spacing is so confusing. increase DS of 01:26:723 (1,2) -
[Mochi's Hard]
wow, see you again~
  1. 00:03:690 (3) - move downward for good flow
  2. 00:06:013 (1,2) - u~m, combine into 1 slider?
  3. 00:12:787 (1) - curve leftward a little
  4. 00:52:852 (3,1) - check blanketting
  5. 00:59:239 (1,2) - ^
  6. 01:10:077 (6,1) - swap DS
  7. 01:24:594 (2,4) - move 01:25:368 (4) - downward. hard to play because slider start is almost covered.
  8. 01:27:110- I highly recommend to add a note!
if you OK, M4M please ;)
~Good Luck~


exami

examination wrote:

M4M

[General]
00:00:594 - I guess a red up line is needed here to change the offset, as you see many of the following beats start at the red lines (I don't know if I express it right 0.0 it's the 2nd of the 4/4 beats), even the kiai time starts there. Also this will make the first red line lead the sting music and the second red line lead the drum, which makes sense.
I guess the audio is not cutted well since it ends suddenly (? just my idea.

[Easy]
01:12:594 (4) - guess it has been mentioned by modders above.

00:51:690 (1) - I didn't expected a spin here, I think a long slider will work well w spin works well here, maybe get more opinions.

[Normal]
00:40:852 (1,2) - blanket
00:42:400 (3,4,5) - I guess curves will make these three sliders look nice I like straight slider here
01:02:529 (3) - Remove this and add notes on 01:02:336 & 01:02:723 to follow the rhythm patterns, or it will make players feel a bit strange.
01:14:916 (3) - ^ Nope, I'd prefer mine.

[Mochi's Hard]
00:15:110 (3,4) - I think just a slider is enough~
01:11:626 (1,2) - These 2 sliders should be placed apart or players will be think that 2 is follow 1/4 beats after 1 since it's just after 01:10:658 (1,2)
01:27:110 - A note is needed?

[Insane]
00:07:368 (1,2,3,4,1) - A regular star maybe?
00:28:465 (1,2,3,4,5,1) - A regular hexagon?
00:30:206 (2) - blanket
00:31:561 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - I don't think a stream is rightly placed here, since I can't find sounds at 00:31:658 00:31:852 00:32:045. You can place jumps here.
01:09:497 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - same ^ but you can keep this stream since 00:57:110 (1,2,3,4,5,6) is placed

00:57:110 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - This one is rightly placed cuz it follows the piano
keep all streams, fix some more patterns.



Good Luck~wwww


I prefer current mp3. sound fine to me

updated.
Mira-san
aaaa gg dis map
BeatofIke
Hi Tari-san! Random timing mod! >w<

Your timing sounds too early and off-measure as well. Try using 215 (+8) as the offset and add another red timing section at 602 so the metronome is on measure. It should look like this:



Also, don't forgot to do the same thing for every difficulty and re-snap all notes and timing sections afterwards.
Good luck with your map!
:D
Topic Starter
Tari
Fixed!

Thank you for stars BeatofIke and Nanaka <3
Knotts
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaa go Tari!
pieguyn
[Easy]
00:13:763 (1) - http://puu.sh/csm73/d5789de867.jpg ? better blanket imo
00:17:634 (1) - dont understand why soft finish here, it's not here on other diffs
00:45:505 (1) - normal-hitnormal on end?
01:06:989 (1) - soft finish here? imo fits better than drum finish, also fits with the rest of the finishes. up to you (if you accept, change on other diffs too)

[Normal]
00:48:601 (2,3) - spacing
01:23:827 (3) - missing normal-hitnormal here?

[Mochi's Hard]
00:33:698 (4) - imo make it more straight, looks nicer and also consistent with others
00:59:247 (1) - move 2nd point down for better blanket

[Insane]
00:40:860 (1) - finish on start to match cymbal
01:07:956 (4) - move left a bit to make the structure more consistent? also feels like less of a stretch to play. just a suggestion

don't see anything wrong. nice map, gl >w<
-Nanaka-
hi Tari & Momochikun!!! :oops:

short suggestion

[General]
  1. Widescreen E.N.I
  2. Unsnap Preview time
  3. Video offset 0 Also I was comparing official and many times
[Easy]
  1. 00:06:892 (1) - Do not too close?red line start
  2. 00:13:763 (1,2) - incompatibility try this
  3. 00:19:763 (4) - The big sound remove Clap
  4. 00:47:053 (2) - Sampleset Auto & whistle end?
  5. 00:48:601 (1) - Sampleset Auto & whistle hed?
  6. 01:27:214 (1) - Do not too close?white line start
[Normal]
  1. 00:19:763 (5) - The big sound remove Clap
  2. 00:46:085 (2,5) - whistle hed? 00:49:182 (3) - Same sound here
  3. 00:48:601 (2) - Sampleset Auto & whistle hed?
  4. 01:02:537 (3,4) - incompatibility try this
  5. 01:14:924 (3,4) - ^
  6. 01:27:214 (1) - Do not too close?white line start
[Mochi H]
  1. 00:15:118 (3) - Remove Clap end
  2. 00:07:376 (1,2) - Conversely whistle or All whistle
  3. 00:57:698 (4) - same NC kiai start
  4. 01:17:053 (3) - Remove Clap end...No such sound
[Insane]
  1. 00:00:408 (2,3) - stack off
fine

Two co nice map :oops:
Topic Starter
Tari

pieguy1372 wrote:

[Easy]
00:13:763 (1) - http://puu.sh/csm73/d5789de867.jpg ? better blanket imo I like how the slider looks right now,
00:17:634 (1) - dont understand why soft finish here, it's not here on other diffs they are here in each diff.
00:45:505 (1) - normal-hitnormal on end?
01:06:989 (1) - soft finish here? imo fits better than drum finish, also fits with the rest of the finishes. up to you (if you accept, change on other diffs too)

[Normal]
00:48:601 (2,3) - spacing
01:23:827 (3) - missing normal-hitnormal here?

[Mochi's Hard]
00:33:698 (4) - imo make it more straight, looks nicer and also consistent with others
00:59:247 (1) - move 2nd point down for better blanket

[Insane]
00:40:860 (1) - finish on start to match cymbal
01:07:956 (4) - move left a bit to make the structure more consistent? also feels like less of a stretch to play. just a suggestion

don't see anything wrong. nice map, gl >w<

@Nanaka All Fixed , except 1st suggestion in easy


Thanks for modding!
Xinely
as per request which become m4m (i guess) lol




  • Easy
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - try add finish on head? i hear a cymbal sound here o.o
  2. 00:02:150 - i know what you following to use drum clap here but imo cymbal sound feels so crash here so better to emphasize it instead by with change the hitsound become soft default finish
  3. 00:09:118 (1,2) - imo you still need remove these objects because we need full measure for recovery time here. start mapping in 00:09:698 - would be fine which has loud trumpet sound here
  4. 00:12:601 (3,1) - nazi but im sure you can improve the blanket here
  5. 00:20:731 (1) - maybe just my taste but i prefer soft finish for this time since the cymbal isnt really crash here
  6. 00:22:279 (3) - maybe missing hitsound here? since 00:25:376 - has same music with before and it has drum whistle here. but i prefer to add whistle only for that slider
  7. 00:23:827 (1) - another taste that imo Normal hitnormal feels too loud here. i prefer to use drum clap but it really just my taste
  8. 00:36:214 (1) - maybe missing whistle on head here?
  9. 00:45:214 - nazi, unncessary greenline here
  10. 00:54:021 (1) - must be removed for recovery time here
  11. 01:11:053 (2) - change with finish? it hear a crash cymbal sound here so imo whistle isnt good enough for emphasize it
  12. 01:06:989 (1,2) - maybe just me that i feel blanket can improved here http://puu.sh/cGALP.jpg
  13. 01:13:182 - imo this time has a quite loud trumpet sound here so you should map this time, well easiest rhythm just change 01:12:601 (4,1,2) - become http://puu.sh/cGB2U.jpg
  14. 01:17:634 - maybe add note here? i just feel the Easy kinda easy here coz has kinda long gap from rhythms, i guess add note here wont be too hurt for newbie
  15. 01:19:569 (1) - use soft finish instead of drum finish here? the music has crash cymbal sound here, imo drum finish not strong enough for it


  • Normal
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - same as Easy
  2. 00:08:924 - at least the rhythm can be started in here. 2/1 beats for recover time
  3. 00:14:343 (1,2,3,4) - the rhythm a little bit long here imo, i guess you can make simplifier rhythm such as http://puu.sh/cGRie.jpg (basically it already mapped the rhythms that you mapped before)
  4. 00:20:924 (2) - maybe you can change this slider with a circle at 00:21:118 - to follow vocal instead to make easier rhythm
  5. 00:31:182 (3,4) - hmm kinda weird for me when you map the stanza with slider's tail. it has quite loud drum sound so for me better to map it with clickable object, how about http://puu.sh/cGRw7.jpg ?
  6. 00:30:601 (2) - is 0,86x intentional here? well i prefer to keep the consistent spacing though
  7. 00:34:279 (3) - hmm according flow on previous sliders, it should be placed around 88,128 here (p.s : make inconsistency spacing with next objects)
  8. 00:37:182 (3) - imo the music is quite loud here while i feel whistle isnt enough to emphasize. maybe try drum whistle here?
  9. 00:38:537 (1,2) - well i can understand the NC here coz pattern but i still feel that better to NC in stanza for emphasize the musics change here
  10. 00:42:021 (2) - nazi but inconsistency spacing (1,11x) here
  11. 00:42:408 (3,4,5) - maybe just for me but if you see these pattern from (3) (4) first, they dont look like a perfect triangle here, try make them become a nice triangle shape with any dimmension to see please http://puu.sh/cGSfa.jpg ~
  12. 00:48:214 (1,2) - swap the NC to better read the patterns, also the stanza here
  13. 00:56:924 (2) - change this slider become a circle at 00:57:118 - ? it has louder music than those red ticks here (also avoid long rhythms from 00:54:795 - until 00:58:860 - )
  14. 00:59:247 (4) - add some hitsound on slider's head? i guess i feel kinda empty here when the vocal is kinda strong
  15. 01:00:795 - it has strong trumpet sound here, please map this time :C
  16. 01:11:247 (3) - hmm move this circle to 01:11:440 - ? the drum is louder there
  17. 01:18:601 (2) - the flow can improved here imo if you place the slider in rightward, i mean as https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2213056 and you can stack https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2213059 them like this on 01:18:601 (2) - 's head
  18. 01:22:666 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - i know this is hard to fix but i feel the rhythms are too long here, well my suggestion just 01:25:182 (6) - remove this and use circle on whitetick


  • Hard
    Javanese here we go /runs
  1. 00:03:698 (3) - gae repeat e slider lali whistle? ben podo karo 00:04:472 (4) -
  2. 00:14:924 (2) - well overlap karo next slider e rodo elek dilihat jare ku, mendingan pindah en nang 164,164
  3. 00:15:118 (3) - well 3/4 disini kedengaran aneh imo, musik blue tick jg gak kuat jadi beneran suggest buat 1/2 aja
  4. 00:22:860 (2) - arahin flownya ke atas please ben flow e bener2 lebih natural http://puu.sh/cHgDr.jpg
  5. 00:36:795 (4) - well abis triplet kerasa susah kalo lgsg dikasih jump, mendingan pke normal spacing atau mini jump kek 1,5x spacing gtu
  6. 00:48:214 (4) - well personally gw ngeroso overlap e gak terlalu apik, agak blend sama previous slider sisan jadi e lumayan susah baca (dikit)
  7. 00:57:698 (4,1) - tau ini style cuma beneran NC nya gak ada arti khusus kok disana, spacing ya kecil, gampang dibaca juga iya.. pendingan taruh 00:57:698 (4) - buat emphasize jump gtu, sek lebih bisa dimengerti
  8. 01:09:698 (3,4,5) - jadiin slider repeat aja? well cuma taste aja soalnya gw emang gak terlalu suka triplet di Hard
  9. 01:10:085 (6,1) - sama kek 00:57:698 (4,1) -
  10. 01:16:279 (1,3) - stack properly?


  • Insane
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - same as Easy
  2. 00:03:118 (2,3,4) - this is calm part so i would say to reduce the spacing here example use 1,5x or 1,3x here. a circle (mini) jumps would be nicer for calm part for me
  3. 00:09:698 (1) - the music on slider's head has cymbal sound so change whistle become finish
  4. 00:11:247 (1) - the slider's head music has melody sound of the trumpet so i feel quite empty here, try add whistle?
  5. 00:15:118 (3,2) - ^
  6. 00:45:505 (1) - nazi and just my taste that you could do more natural flow if you make the curve on downward instead of upward
  7. 00:51:311 (2) - make this as 3/4 for this slider and change into 1/2 for next slider? imo that rhythms feel better since 3/4 following the vocal here http://puu.sh/cHiAv.jpg
  8. 01:09:505 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - make the flow of the streams become smoother please since kinda weird to see when the 4 circles in first time are straight and suddenly it changed become curving for (5) and (6)
  9. 01:18:601 (2) - personally i feel that jump is too small here, you can make it futher example https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2214241
  10. 01:19:569 (1) - personally i prefer to use soft finish on this head coz the crash cymbal here, well just my taste after all
  11. 01:19:569 (1) - still on this slider, i feel the repeat a little bit empty too coz it has vocal here. maybe add whistle for it?
  12. 01:27:118 (2) - personally i prefer to make further spacing too here, 376,48 looks not bad for me
  13. Love your style <3

try find 2 mods more and then call me back ;)
Topic Starter
Tari
Xinely

Xinely wrote:

as per request which become m4m (i guess) lol




  • Easy
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - try add finish on head? i hear a cymbal sound here o.o
  2. 00:02:150 - i know what you following to use drum clap here but imo cymbal sound feels so crash here so better to emphasize it instead by with change the hitsound become soft default finish , its enough recovery time, I don't know where you got that from.
  3. 00:09:118 (1,2) - imo you still need remove these objects because we need full measure for recovery time here. start mapping in 00:09:698 - would be fine which has loud trumpet sound here
  4. 00:12:601 (3,1) - nazi but im sure you can improve the blanket here
  5. 00:20:731 (1) - maybe just my taste but i prefer soft finish for this time since the cymbal isnt really crash here
  6. 00:22:279 (3) - maybe missing hitsound here? since 00:25:376 - has same music with before and it has drum whistle here. but i prefer to add whistle only for that slider , quiet part. I don't want to add hitsounds for this section, drum whistle sound nice there so I kept it
  7. 00:23:827 (1) - another taste that imo Normal hitnormal feels too loud here. i prefer to use drum clap but it really just my taste , kept this, it sounds nice, distinguishable sound
  8. 00:36:214 (1) - maybe missing whistle on head here?
  9. 00:45:214 - nazi, unncessary greenline here
  10. 00:54:021 (1) - must be removed for recovery time here , nope, its enough recovery, I skipped 1 white tick here
  11. 01:11:053 (2) - change with finish? it hear a crash cymbal sound here so imo whistle isnt good enough for emphasize it too loud
  12. 01:06:989 (1,2) - maybe just me that i feel blanket can improved here http://puu.sh/cGALP.jpg
  13. 01:13:182 - imo this time has a quite loud trumpet sound here so you should map this time, well easiest rhythm just change 01:12:601 (4,1,2) - become http://puu.sh/cGB2U.jpg this pattern really nice :( , I prefer to keep this rhythm its simple for easy.
  14. 01:17:634 - maybe add note here? i just feel the Easy kinda easy here coz has kinda long gap from rhythms, i guess add note here wont be too hurt for newbie its fine, I prefer not to.
  15. 01:19:569 (1) - use soft finish instead of drum finish here? the music has crash cymbal sound here, imo drum finish not strong enough for it


  • Normal
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - same as Easy
  2. 00:08:924 - at least the rhythm can be started in here. 2/1 beats for recover time imo, enough time to recover here.
  3. 00:14:343 (1,2,3,4) - the rhythm a little bit long here imo, i guess you can make simplifier rhythm such as http://puu.sh/cGRie.jpg (basically it already mapped the rhythms that you mapped before)
  4. 00:20:924 (2) - maybe you can change this slider with a circle at 00:21:118 - to follow vocal instead to make easier rhythm
  5. 00:31:182 (3,4) - hmm kinda weird for me when you map the stanza with slider's tail. it has quite loud drum sound so for me better to map it with clickable object, how about http://puu.sh/cGRw7.jpg ? , you told me kinda hard above, so I don't use circles for that part, cuz beats there are almost same as 00:26:924 (1,2) -
  6. 00:30:601 (2) - is 0,86x intentional here? well i prefer to keep the consistent spacing though
  7. 00:34:279 (3) - hmm according flow on previous sliders, it should be placed around 88,128 here (p.s : make inconsistency spacing with next objects)
  8. 00:37:182 (3) - imo the music is quite loud here while i feel whistle isnt enough to emphasize. maybe try drum whistle here?
  9. 00:38:537 (1,2) - well i can understand the NC here coz pattern but i still feel that better to NC in stanza for emphasize the musics change here keep nc for this.
  10. 00:42:021 (2) - nazi but inconsistency spacing (1,11x) here
  11. 00:42:408 (3,4,5) - maybe just for me but if you see these pattern from (3) (4) first, they dont look like a perfect triangle here, try make them become a nice triangle shape with any dimmension to see please http://puu.sh/cGSfa.jpg ~ the triangle look fine to me, yours look little smaller.
  12. 00:48:214 (1,2) - swap the NC to better read the patterns, also the stanza here
  13. 00:56:924 (2) - change this slider become a circle at 00:57:118 - ? it has louder music than those red ticks here (also avoid long rhythms from 00:54:795 - until 00:58:860 - )
  14. 00:59:247 (4) - add some hitsound on slider's head? i guess i feel kinda empty here when the vocal is kinda strong
  15. 01:00:795 - it has strong trumpet sound here, please map this time :C kept, its intentional and have to change 01:12:989 (1) -
  16. 01:11:247 (3) - hmm move this circle to 01:11:440 - ? the drum is louder there
  17. 01:18:601 (2) - the flow can improved here imo if you place the slider in rightward, i mean as https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2213056 and you can stack https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2213059 them like this on 01:18:601 (2) - 's head , good flow. its pattern I'm forming, I curve them left more and put them left of slider end.
  18. 01:22:666 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - i know this is hard to fix but i feel the rhythms are too long here, well my suggestion just 01:25:182 (6) - remove this and use circle on whitetick


  • Hard
    Javanese here we go /runs
  1. 00:03:698 (3) - gae repeat e slider lali whistle? ben podo karo 00:04:472 (4) -
  2. 00:14:924 (2) - well overlap karo next slider e rodo elek dilihat jare ku, mendingan pindah en nang 164,164
  3. 00:15:118 (3) - well 3/4 disini kedengaran aneh imo, musik blue tick jg gak kuat jadi beneran suggest buat 1/2 aja
  4. 00:22:860 (2) - arahin flownya ke atas please ben flow e bener2 lebih natural http://puu.sh/cHgDr.jpg
  5. 00:36:795 (4) - well abis triplet kerasa susah kalo lgsg dikasih jump, mendingan pke normal spacing atau mini jump kek 1,5x spacing gtu
  6. 00:48:214 (4) - well personally gw ngeroso overlap e gak terlalu apik, agak blend sama previous slider sisan jadi e lumayan susah baca (dikit)
  7. 00:57:698 (4,1) - tau ini style cuma beneran NC nya gak ada arti khusus kok disana, spacing ya kecil, gampang dibaca juga iya.. pendingan taruh 00:57:698 (4) - buat emphasize jump gtu, sek lebih bisa dimengerti
  8. 01:09:698 (3,4,5) - jadiin slider repeat aja? well cuma taste aja soalnya gw emang gak terlalu suka triplet di Hard
  9. 01:10:085 (6,1) - sama kek 00:57:698 (4,1) -
  10. 01:16:279 (1,3) - stack properly?


  • Insane
  1. 00:00:602 (1) - same as Easy
  2. 00:03:118 (2,3,4) - this is calm part so i would say to reduce the spacing here example use 1,5x or 1,3x here. a circle (mini) jumps would be nicer for calm part for me , movement still the same imo, I'd prefer to keep cause this pattern pretty easy to play.
  3. 00:09:698 (1) - the music on slider's head has cymbal sound so change whistle become finish , nah I like how they sound currently.
  4. 00:11:247 (1) - the slider's head music has melody sound of the trumpet so i feel quite empty here, try add whistle? I think its ok, whistles sounds are for other beats.
  5. 00:15:118 (3,2) - ^
  6. 00:45:505 (1) - nazi and just my taste that you could do more natural flow if you make the curve on downward instead of upward
  7. 00:51:311 (2) - make this as 3/4 for this slider and change into 1/2 for next slider? imo that rhythms feel better since 3/4 following the vocal here http://puu.sh/cHiAv.jpg imo if I do that, I have to change to 0.50 SV , and I kinda want jump to next note.
  8. 01:09:505 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - make the flow of the streams become smoother please since kinda weird to see when the 4 circles in first time are straight and suddenly it changed become curving for (5) and (6) intentional.
  9. 01:18:601 (2) - personally i feel that jump is too small here, you can make it futher example https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/2214241 , really weird flow, too much down when your moving up.
  10. 01:19:569 (1) - personally i prefer to use soft finish on this head coz the crash cymbal here, well just my taste after all
  11. 01:19:569 (1) - still on this slider, i feel the repeat a little bit empty too coz it has vocal here. maybe add whistle for it?
  12. 01:27:118 (2) - personally i prefer to make further spacing too here, 376,48 looks not bad for me
  13. Love your style <3

try find 2 mods more and then call me back ;)


Thanks!
Momovely
hi~

mod req from in game chat

[Easy]

clear

[Normal]

00:48:214 (6) -  How about that I change it into a slider to a sound?



00:49:763 (3,4) -  How is such an introduction? Is this good personally? I thought of



01:02:537 (3) - delete note  01:02:343 (3) -  How about the 1/1 slider to a sound from here?



01:21:892 (1) -  The one that I inclined a little looks cool


[Mochi's Hard]

00:15:118 (3) - There was sense of incongruity when I played  How about what I change into 1/2 slider?



[INSANE]

00:29:247 (5,1) -  I felt that it was too near  How is such a suggestion?


sorry, Please forgive me if I make a mistake as I am still not good at English. :(

nice map :3

I expect ranked ;)
Topic Starter
Tari
@Momovely, Didn't fix anything in normal, the rhythms are fine to me. wanted to map more than just white ticks to make more challenging.

Everything else fixed though thanks!
Momochikun

Xinely wrote:

as per request which become m4m (i guess) lol




  • Hard
    Javanese here we go /runs /go
  1. 00:03:698 (3) - gae repeat e slider lali whistle? ben podo karo 00:04:472 (4) - added
  2. 00:14:924 (2) - well overlap karo next slider e rodo elek dilihat jare ku, mendingan pindah en nang 164,164 imo sih coolbuat flow
  3. 00:15:118 (3) - well 3/4 disini kedengaran aneh imo, musik blue tick jg gak kuat jadi beneran suggest buat 1/2 aja pending sek, prasaan dok mp3 sing lama ada clap disini >_>
  4. 00:22:860 (2) - arahin flownya ke atas please ben flow e bener2 lebih natural http://puu.sh/cHgDr.jpg beres
  5. 00:36:795 (4) - well abis triplet kerasa susah kalo lgsg dikasih jump, mendingan pke normal spacing atau mini jump kek 1,5x spacing gtu on purpose sih klo yg ini.. tak ganti 1/4 mungkin tapi agak ntaran
  6. 00:48:214 (4) - well personally gw ngeroso overlap e gak terlalu apik, agak blend sama previous slider sisan jadi e lumayan susah baca (dikit) kadung symmetry e.. lmao
  7. 00:57:698 (4,1) - tau ini style cuma beneran NC nya gak ada arti khusus kok disana, spacing ya kecil, gampang dibaca juga iya.. pendingan taruh 00:57:698 (4) - buat emphasize jump gtu, sek lebih bisa dimengerti gede itu kok prasaan ><
  8. 01:09:698 (3,4,5) - jadiin slider repeat aja? well cuma taste aja soalnya gw emang gak terlalu suka triplet di Hard agak susah sbelum kiai reset ngga masalah si imo..
  9. 01:10:085 (6,1) - sama kek 00:57:698 (4,1) - same then
  10. 01:16:279 (1,3) - stack properly? ok


try find 2 mods more and then call me back ;)
also fixed from other mod, thanks :3

SPOILER
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Title:Rakuen no Tsubasa
TitleUnicode:楽園の翼
Artist:Kurosaki Maon
ArtistUnicode:黒崎 真音
Creator:Tari
Version:Mochi's Hard
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:opening fruit of loom forbidden Momochikun adaption
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199,142,42408,6,0,P|142:170|59:158,1,142,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
123,97,42989,2,0,L|145:259,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
233,295,43569,2,0,L|247:223,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
322,187,43956,5,8,0:0:0:0:
400,155,44150,1,2,0:0:0:0:
260,56,44537,1,2,3:0:0:0:
260,56,44924,1,0,3:0:0:0:
181,90,45118,1,0,3:0:0:0:
103,124,45311,1,0,0:0:0:0:
172,173,45505,6,0,P|187:211|191:245,1,71,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
141,310,45892,1,8,0:0:0:0:
219,343,46085,2,0,L|298:331,1,71,0|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
349,240,46472,2,0,L|278:250,2,71,0|8|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
419,287,47053,5,8,0:0:0:0:
444,205,47247,2,0,P|452:167|447:125,1,71,0|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
383,80,47634,2,0,P|322:97|237:104,1,142,2|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
243,104,48214,2,0,L|318:126,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
219,26,48601,6,0,L|150:5,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
68,28,48989,1,8,0:0:0:0:
100,107,49182,2,0,P|118:150|133:246,1,142,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
82,311,49763,1,8,0:0:0:0:
82,311,49956,1,0,0:0:0:0:
162,337,50150,6,0,P|197:336|230:320,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
295,267,50537,1,8,0:0:0:0:
295,267,50731,2,0,P|326:251|362:250,1,71,0|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
435,294,51118,1,0,3:0:0:0:
376,354,51311,2,0,P|344:369|308:370,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
435,294,51698,6,0,B|446:196|446:196|434:136,1,142,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
395,77,52279,2,0,P|325:69|262:122,1,142,0|0,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
252,192,52860,1,8,0:0:0:0:
344,232,53053,6,0,P|355:193|348:154,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
252,192,53440,2,0,L|172:202,2,71,2|0|0,0:0|0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
344,232,54021,1,2,3:0:0:0:
242,293,54214,2,0,L|162:303,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
94,263,54601,5,8,0:0:0:0:
94,263,54698,1,8,0:0:0:0:
94,263,54795,2,0,L|12:252,1,71,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
12,168,55182,1,8,0:0:0:0:
58,97,55376,2,0,P|93:79|136:78,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
207,92,55763,2,0,P|238:108|273:112,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
372,39,56150,6,0,B|356:135|356:135|390:161|390:198,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
413,249,56731,1,8,0:0:0:0:
330,269,56924,5,2,0:0:0:0:
247,289,57118,1,8,0:0:0:0:
275,208,57311,2,0,L|283:170,2,35.5,2|8|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
214,360,57698,2,0,B|171:336|171:280|171:280|139:291|99:262,1,142,4|0,3:1|3:0,0:0:0:0:
101,195,58279,6,0,P|58:206|25:212,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
87,104,58666,2,0,P|121:110|156:119,1,71,0|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
229,162,59053,1,8,0:0:0:0:
291,215,59247,6,0,B|329:247|382:233|382:233|420:255|416:280,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
350,163,59827,2,0,P|347:124|355:86,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
410,30,60214,1,0,3:0:0:0:
327,10,60408,2,0,L|254:21,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
201,85,60795,6,0,B|155:101|155:101|110:80|117:15,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
32,5,61376,1,8,0:0:0:0:
37,90,61569,2,0,P|52:130|78:153,1,71,2|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
147,188,61956,2,0,P|171:213|181:247,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
121,308,62343,6,0,B|162:292|162:292|271:304,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
326,354,62924,1,8,0:0:0:0:
365,278,63118,2,0,P|378:232|373:132,1,142,0|2,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
315,77,63698,1,8,0:0:0:0:
276,163,63892,6,0,B|238:142|238:142|194:166|124:139,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
62,113,64472,1,8,0:0:0:0:
156,74,64666,2,0,L|127:235,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
51,246,65247,1,8,0:0:0:0:
141,309,65440,6,0,P|195:300|283:292,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
360,324,66021,1,8,0:0:0:0:
332,218,66214,2,0,P|261:206|191:201,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
123,149,66795,1,8,0:0:0:0:
239,116,66989,6,0,P|256:166|259:261,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
194,309,67569,1,8,0:0:0:0:
111,289,67763,1,2,0:0:0:0:
168,225,67956,1,0,3:0:0:0:
194,309,68150,2,0,L|202:383,1,71,2|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
306,347,68537,6,0,B|353:325|400:336|400:336|439:285,1,142,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
468,217,69118,1,8,0:0:0:0:
393,175,69311,5,2,0:0:0:0:
318,133,69505,1,0,3:0:0:0:
429,93,69698,1,0,3:0:0:0:
422,72,69795,1,8,0:0:0:0:
416,51,69892,1,8,0:0:0:0:
318,133,70085,2,0,B|266:153|224:131|224:131|196:139|171:171,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
114,200,70666,6,0,P|89:154|91:73,1,106.5,8|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
50,81,71053,2,0,P|78:60|120:52,1,71,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
218,88,71440,1,8,0:0:0:0:
185,200,71634,6,0,P|136:245|46:242,1,142,4|0,3:2|3:0,0:0:0:0:
63,249,72214,2,0,P|48:288|39:322,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
142,276,72601,2,0,P|146:311|155:345,1,71,0|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
235,374,72989,1,8,0:0:0:0:
292,311,73182,6,0,B|330:303|364:319|364:319|392:302|390:257,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
363,178,73763,1,8,0:0:0:0:
301,118,73956,2,0,L|145:137,1,142,2|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
115,207,74537,1,8,0:0:0:0:
37,172,74731,6,0,P|22:122|32:31,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
115,20,75311,1,8,0:0:0:0:
198,6,75505,2,0,P|239:15|284:21,1,71,2|0,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
396,81,75892,2,0,P|360:86|326:94,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
265,153,76279,6,0,P|196:164|138:126,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
50,88,76860,1,8,0:0:0:0:
150,229,77053,2,0,P|153:176|138:126,1,106.5,2|0,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
133,103,77440,2,0,P|122:68|122:34,1,71,0|8,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
210,2,77827,1,2,0:0:0:0:
133,103,78021,6,0,L|54:89,2,71,4|0|8,0:0|3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
217,186,78601,2,0,L|356:210,1,142,4|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
425,261,79182,1,8,0:0:0:0:
446,178,79376,1,2,0:0:0:0:
458,93,79569,6,0,P|354:112|337:113,1,106.5,4|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
231,139,80150,1,2,0:0:0:0:
207,215,80343,2,0,P|265:223|319:235,1,106.5,0|2,3:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
396,322,80924,1,0,3:0:0:0:
313,342,81118,5,4,0:0:0:0:
313,342,82279,2,0,L|266:349,1,35.5,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
247,337,82472,2,0,L|200:344,1,35.5,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
179,357,82666,6,0,B|127:380|86:344|86:344|71:297,1,142,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
100,222,83247,2,0,P|112:184|103:83,1,142,2|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
176,40,83827,1,8,0:0:0:0:
255,68,84021,1,2,0:0:0:0:
335,96,84214,6,0,L|416:83,1,71,0|0,3:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
510,205,84601,2,0,P|448:213|384:150,1,142,8|2,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
467,133,85182,1,0,3:0:0:0:
434,247,85376,2,0,P|443:291|449:317,1,71,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
380,367,85763,6,0,P|345:359|310:352,1,71,2|0,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
225,340,86150,1,8,0:0:0:0:
235,255,86343,1,2,0:0:0:0:
246,170,86537,1,0,3:0:0:0:
258,85,86731,5,2,3:0:0:0:
235,255,87118,1,4,0:0:0:0:
256,192,87214,12,0,88472,0:0:0:0:
syuru
from in game req( ≧ ω ∂ )
aside from my inability to read ar8.3 the map played pretty great, so i only have a few things to say
[Easy]
  1. 00:23:827 (1,2) - i hardly ever notice anything in easy except nitpicky blanket stuff... i think this part can be blanketed better unless this was intentional
[Normal]
  1. 00:12:601 - i think there should be a note here?
  2. 01:06:795 (1) - she starts singing at slider-end so this part feels a bit awkward to me
  3. 01:23:827 - missing note here maybe, goes better w/music i think
[Hard]
  1. 00:06:021 (1,2,3) - this seemed a bit lacking to me, especially because the ar shows the next slider so close and there's nothing for the player to do but pause, except the music isn't really implying a stop and go sort of motion
  2. 01:26:150 (2,3,4,1,2) - this is so picky but i think this feels too linear? like the rest of the map is pretty flowy and i'm thinking a different approach to these notes would look better
[Insane]
  1. 00:24:214 (2) - the overlap seems unnecessary imo
  2. 00:43:956 (1,2) - for some reason i get the feeling that the jump here should be a little bit bigger to set this apart as a pause, it has the same spacing as 00:44:537 (3,4) which makes it seem like all the beats are equally emphasized but 1 and 2 are supposed to be stronger, at least that's what i thought
  3. 01:04:279 (2) - i think the timing here can be clearer if it's overlapped slightly by 1 instead of a direct stack, so like what you did at 01:10:085 (1,2) instead of how it is now, this applies to the other slider>note patterns in this part
  4. 01:15:311 (2,3) - too much overlap maybe? it's not consistent w/the overlapping on the rest of map
  5. 01:17:053 (4,5) - these should slightly overlap i think, not doing so suddenly can be confusing imo
  6. 01:19:569 (1,2) - i think one of these repeat sliders is probably fine but having two makes this part seem too simple for insane
nothing i pointed out has anything to do with big issues; they're mostly things i think would improve playing and appearance so it's all up to you, good luck!
Topic Starter
Tari

ankou wrote:

from in game req( ≧ ω ∂ )
aside from my inability to read ar8.3 the map played pretty great, so i only have a few things to say
[Easy]
  1. 00:23:827 (1,2) - i hardly ever notice anything in easy except nitpicky blanket stuff... i think this part can be blanketed better unless this was intentional
[Normal]
  1. 00:12:601 - i think there should be a note here?
  2. 01:06:795 (1) - she starts singing at slider-end so this part feels a bit awkward to me
  3. 01:23:827 - missing note here maybe, goes better w/music i think
[Hard]
  1. 00:06:021 (1,2,3) - this seemed a bit lacking to me, especially because the ar shows the next slider so close and there's nothing for the player to do but pause, except the music isn't really implying a stop and go sort of motion
  2. 01:26:150 (2,3,4,1,2) - this is so picky but i think this feels too linear? like the rest of the map is pretty flowy and i'm thinking a different approach to these notes would look better
[Insane]
  1. 00:24:214 (2) - the overlap seems unnecessary imo kept, them the same. the notes form a triangle.
  2. 00:43:956 (1,2) - for some reason i get the feeling that the jump here should be a little bit bigger to set this apart as a pause, it has the same spacing as 00:44:537 (3,4) which makes it seem like all the beats are equally emphasized but 1 and 2 are supposed to be stronger, at least that's what i thought spacing is negligible here.
  3. 01:04:279 (2) - i think the timing here can be clearer if it's overlapped slightly by 1 instead of a direct stack, so like what you did at 01:10:085 (1,2) instead of how it is now, this applies to the other slider>note patterns in this part
  4. 01:15:311 (2,3) - too much overlap maybe? it's not consistent w/the overlapping on the rest of map
  5. 01:17:053 (4,5) - these should slightly overlap i think, not doing so suddenly can be confusing imo really prefer this, the pattern I want here will be kept.
  6. 01:19:569 (1,2) - i think one of these repeat sliders is probably fine but having two makes this part seem too simple for insane
nothing i pointed out has anything to do with big issues; they're mostly things i think would improve playing and appearance so it's all up to you, good luck!


Kept normal rhythms the same, they're getting really difficult.

Everything else fixed though thanks!
Xinely
we did many rechecks before go here, looks nice for me now

Bubbled! ヽ(。ゝω・。)ノ

Sakura
K all looks good to me
Qualified!
HabiHolic
Gratz Tari~
BeatofIke
Congrats :)
Kinshara
Tariiiii congratssss!!!
Oracle
too fast for me to approach! >:(
Knotts
Grats Tari :D
Xinely
How fast. Grats Tari ~
Rakuen
:) Grats :)
Natsu
Congratz Rakuen Tari :)
Oyatsu
Congratz! Tari :)
Lanturn
Grisaia!

Congrats Tari <3
Veemon
congratz !!
Myxo
Gratz Tari! :)
-Nanaka-
いえーーーい :)
Topic Starter
Tari
Thanks!
febirizky

Tari wrote:

This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on Thursday, November 13, 2014 at 3:12:23 PM

Artist: Kurosaki Maon
Title: Rakuen no Tsubasa
Source: グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags: opening fruit of loom forbidden Momochikun adaption
BPM: 155
Filesize: 20363kb
Play Time: 01:28
Difficulties Available:
  1. Easy (1.47 stars, 86 notes)
  2. Insane (3.89 stars, 284 notes)
  3. Mochi's Hard (3.12 stars, 238 notes)
  4. Normal (2.04 stars, 152 notes)
Download: Kurosaki Maon - Rakuen no Tsubasa
Download: Kurosaki Maon - Rakuen no Tsubasa (no video)
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
osu! needs more Grisaia!!
video by lust thanks.
grisaia 8-)
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