I'd rather have people like OP asking for help instead of failures like you being the worst condescending prick possible for no fucking reason.
Looks like i am only one who don't see any reason of "playing" (i bet now you call it like this right) way too hard stuff at ceratin point.
I already gave this topic a chance but when this guy just said he wants to play this maps anyway without reading people advices... well, nothing to say more.
I will take note on your criticism, sadly not too constructive but always, thanks.
GoldenWolf brings the pain
In this case, he is right and i take this with full responsibility.
--------------------------- Edit ---------------------------
Ok, to not be like Wolfie called me, let me at least try, another time.
OP:
1) Your top ranks hurts, a lot, you have waaaay too many garbage scores at your rank. - You should focus right now on playing and full combo maps what are easy for you. Reason for this - you need to learn how STD works, how patterns work and especialy, how to properly and accurate hit circles. This takes time, takes effort but later on, pay with way better gameplay ability.
2) 4 star / 5 star are not your level, forget about them right now.
Use this link:
https://osu.ppy.sh/p/beatmaplist?s=3&o= ... 0&la=0&ra=Check star count recommended for you (number near "Difficulty" on bar right above song list) and play this.
As soon as you will full combo stuff with very high acc 97/98%+ your recommended rank will rise and for sure, you will be able to handle harder maps.
3) Challenge yourself doesn't mean destroy your ability to playing game. By playing stuff what is too hard, you will literaly destroy your ability to play maps properly later on. Mashing buttons is worst possible bad behavior and it takes A LOT of time to unlearn and regain ability of proper gameplay. Don't do this.
Journey into 4-5* is slow and sometimes boring but it is worth all effort, as i said - it will pay later on.
Cheers, wish you make some research about sticky topics in GnR and understand what i mean.