I believe in America.
America has made my fortune.
And I raised my daughter
in the American fashion.
I gave her freedom, but I taught her
never to dishonour her family.
She found a boyfriend, not an Italian.
She went to the movies with him.
She stayed out late.
I didn't protest.
Two months ago he took her for a drive
with another boyfriend.
They made her drink whiskey...
...and then they tried to
take advantage of her.
She resisted, she kept her honour.
So they beat her like an animal.
When I went to the hospital,
her nose was broken...
...her jaw was shattered,
held together by wire.
She couldn't even weep
because of the pain.
But I wept. Why did I weep?
She was the light of my life.
Beautiful girl.
Now she will never be beautiful again.

Westo and Meah made this thread great again. Round of applause!

Tonight.
So what!
Yes.
Eh...
No... no, no, no...
Wait.
Look.
For you.
No... no, no, no...
Watch out.
There you go.
Me... here.
There.
Presto... and there you go.
Good evening.
Please.
Let... let me see.
Rabbit... rabbit...
Ah, rabbit!
Lobster... lobster...
No, thanks.
Well.
Me... pass pass.
Magic, not magic.
Me... magician.
Well, let me start again.
Me, this way.
Bye!
Rabbit?
Ah, rabbit!
Enjoy your meal!
Yes.
Ha ha, that's it! Call his agent!
Pass pass.
Good evening.
Hello.
Yes, I wanted to...
No... no, no, no, no. It's over!
To Sophie Tatischeff...

Longest shit ever posted...

Congats bruh~

levesterz wrote:

Ahh that book Loli fairy 😂

hehe xd

Alexa, play the Titanic OST.....
We are sinking now....

my eyes are a soft mushy mess
they make me see less
get me away from this shit
I want to see something lit

This thread has gone down beyond hell

@Westo

I always hated horses.

Got kicked by one in face as a child and I never forgave their species for it. Give me a mustang by Ford any day.

I always hates horses ... They make me itch places I don't want to scratch. But now that it's gone.. I miss it... even the stink... Dated a cowgirl once that smelled that way... She was pretty but she stank like horses... She couldn't keep off of them I guess. There's a lot of things I miss out here right now.

Been out here so long I am not even sure what I am doing anymore... What was this for? It's slipping away... Like a memory I want to forget.

....just a nightmare.

I was looking for someone. Or was he looking for me?

The sun is frying my brain, this rotten egg of mine. Scrabbled by the heat.

Why is it so hot here? And where is here. I don't remember that either. Been riding so long I forgot.

Kind of like this place. Forgotten. Some forgotten corner of the world.

God forgot this place and gave it to Satan. A hiding place. A place to hide from everyone he's harmed... Including me. Now I am here to end it. Stop the devil in his tracks and hurt him like he hurt me.

Hunting Satan... That's what it feels like. Hunting the devil himself. Payback for everything he's done to me.

Probably hiding in some nice cool cave, with fresh little spring of water. Getting drunk on it. Didn't Jesus turn water in to wine?

Could he turn dirt in to water for me? Please... I'm begging you. A drop. Anything.

But the devil won't allow that here. The devil who hides...

Where are you Satan?!

I don't even remember his real name anymore. The man I'm looking for... Or was he looking for me. Doesn't matter any more. We're both lost...

There... I see him... In the distance... He's watching me.
(A shadow appears across the stage)

What's he doing? Why is he just standing there?

He's got something in his hand... A gun? No... It's water. The devil's tempting me... Water for life.

Normally I hate water. Hate drinkin the stuff. It takes like nothing.

Give me something in a can... A nice cool can... Nothing sweeter than cool liquid from a can... Pop that top And let it slip down your throat.

I'd kill for that water. Kill the devil with my own two hands... Drink it down, lick his sweat then drink his blood.

(He gets up and yells)

What do you want from me?!

(He runs and attacks)

I will drag you down to hell with me. Death ain't so bad when you bring a friend. Die with me. Join me in the fire.

(but the shadowy figure is gone... It was a cactus. The shadow of the cactus is now clear. It almost looks more like cross than a cactus)

He wants my soul. Water for my soul. I thought he already had it. I thought I'd turned down that road a long time ago.

Does this mean I can still be saved?

Is there a way out?

Have I been forgiven?

God sent me an angel... My own beautiful angel... Who smiles upon me an bring me light. Does she bring salvation?

This is the last one... I promise... No more hunting... No more of these journeys through hell... Just you... Only you.

Please... Don't let me go. Tell me to stay. I want so badly to stay with you.

I need you my angel... Take me in your heavenly arms. Deliver me from this evil.

Forsaken... God forsaken... In hell itself... Burning... Burning forever in this valley of shadows...

(Finds of bit of shade by a cactus and struggles to get in it)

Hiding in the shadows...

(He is poked in the head by a cactus needle)

My crown of thorns... Satan mocks me. Then leaves me to die.

(Lies down in a cross like shadow cast by a cactus)

No... Dying is too easy... You wouldn't want that. I need to suffer for my sins.

So many sins.

Hurting an angel... Is there any worse evil? Luring her from heaven and then destroying her. Please mend her wings... Take her broken wings and let her fly again.

(Looks up and sees something - a vulture circling)

Fly away far from here... Never to return...

Please...

But she always returns, broken... Return to my side to comfort the one who tortures her... Torments her...

Could she find me now? Could she find me in hell? Her wings burning... Fighting demons to reach me. Does she hate herself enough to do that for me?

I always thought I was the hero... Helping those in need... But it was just a lie I told myself ... So many lies... You liked the lies sometimes... You wanted to believe I was good... Believe in me.

I want to believe.

Do you forgive me my angel? Please forgive me. Please smile at me again like you used to. Give me life again.

So little left inside... You've taken so much from me. I've lost so much.

Give it back to me!

Give me back my soul.

Give me the darkness of heaven... The cool relief of your starry night.

I fear evil. I fear the fire and the burning... But I fear losing you more. Losing my angel. Losing my heart...

Lost.

(The lights become brighter and brighter behind him, upstage - he is between the light and the audience so he appears like a silhouette)

Is this that bright light they tell you about in the end?

(Staring in to the light - he kneels before the light and is a shadow)

Are you there my angel? Will you take me on arms? Send me your smile... That is my heaven.

Please... Take me to heaven....

(shadows - clouds move over the lights and the lights grow darker and darker)

Please don't go.

Please don't leave me. I need you.

(He cries and falls to the ground. Kneeling and reaching out)

I need you.

(The stage grows darker. He takes out him gun and shakily holds it to his head. He is about to pull the trigger - now darkness. Thunder, then raindrops are heard)

Salvation... She brings me salvation.

This thread has devolved from "shitposting" (arguably) to just pure spam. I think it's about time to put it to rest.

WE ARE VICTORIOUS!!!

The Shitpost Thread have been unlocked, due to the efforts of all of OT's denizens!
I want to say thank you to whoever have voted "yes", and to Death, who have approved our petition!

Now we can stop shit posting on clone threads and keep the shit posting fiesta here, where it all started.
Let the celebration begins!

tad01123 wrote:

just gonna put this here

as it deserves to be

We have saved the shit post thread from the depths of hell and captured the bio terrorist Ashton.
What a time to be alive in OT.

aaaaand lock it back up

why . . . just . . . WHY???

silence all spammers

wow it actually came back kek

lock this thread up!!!!

ColdTooth wrote:

lock this thread up!!!!

Hey, something i can do, brb

WalterToro wrote:

ColdTooth wrote:

lock this thread up!!!!

Hey, something i can do, brb

take this gem i found too

owh pls noe

charamaru wrote:

tad01123 wrote:

just gonna put this here

as it deserves to be

...This is glorious.

wait what

o damn

I just woke up to this. It's like I'm a child waking up on Christmas morning again!

my dreams has come true!

Thx me later, for sharing this amazing tutorial

Im dreaming? this is real?

thoust hecking hecks,

heck off of thine prized booty!

hecking heckpost-ridden hecks!

This a haiku
Hai hai hai hai hai hai hai
Ku ku ku ku ku

i hate ninja-ing

about as much as being

ninja'd myself. oof

EDIT: formatting

Haiku-ridden threads
might be the perfect shitposts.
Well, let's test it out.

i've been looking for

the absolute shitpost form.

this might be the one.

I enjoy spaghetti.

Best-served with Bolognese sauce,

It's a favorite.

Spaghetti cheese so good

I'd just like to say that it took around 10 hours for anyone to notice the thread was unlocked. Meanwhile, people were actively posting in the threads that were made to get this thread unlocked. Just a fun fact.

i guess everyone (including me) just assumed there would be an announcement made or a new post in the thread if it were to be unlocked, so nobody went and checked on it. definitely interesting to point out though, death. :thinking:

edit: fixed some things

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

Or we can just make leg thread ver2

levesterz wrote:

Or we can just make leg thread ver2

I'd prefer a hand thread tbh

limb thread when

Just don't get apeshit like last time tho :/

reeee

johnmedina999 wrote:

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

I suppose, but this thread was still on the first page. There also aren't multiple threads asking to unlock said leg thread.

Death wrote:

johnmedina999 wrote:

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

I suppose, but this thread was still on the first page. There also aren't multiple threads asking to unlock said leg thread.

So, what I took from this is that all we have to do is protest/petition with multiple threads to get our wants? Are you saying that this is a democracy?

Penguin wrote:

Death wrote:

johnmedina999 wrote:

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

I suppose, but this thread was still on the first page. There also aren't multiple threads asking to unlock said leg thread.

So, what I took from this is that all we have to do is protest/petition with multiple threads to get our wants? Are you saying that this is a democracy?

Nope, this is still a dictatorship.

Death wrote:

Penguin wrote:

Death wrote:

johnmedina999 wrote:

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

I suppose, but this thread was still on the first page. There also aren't multiple threads asking to unlock said leg thread.

So, what I took from this is that all we have to do is protest/petition with multiple threads to get our wants? Are you saying that this is a democracy?

Nope, this is still a dictatorship.

shit... well I tried.

does anybody else remember what happened to Napoleon Bonaparte? I smell a coup incoming..

lol

Yay !

Shit post thread unlocked

Everyone is shit posting

My job here is done.

Penguin wrote:

Death wrote:

Penguin wrote:

Death wrote:

johnmedina999 wrote:

I mean, you could unlock leg thread but it'll be buried under so many pages of threads that no one would notice in months, maybe years.

I suppose, but this thread was still on the first page. There also aren't multiple threads asking to unlock said leg thread.

So, what I took from this is that all we have to do is protest/petition with multiple threads to get our wants? Are you saying that this is a democracy?

Nope, this is still a dictatorship.

shit... well I tried.
does anybody else remember what happened to Napoleon Bonaparte? I smell a coup incoming..

HA HA HA. we're fuqed.

Kiratto Pri-chan

I can't wait for Date A Live 3 ep 6-12, the only arc that matters.
Tobiichi Origami <3

It's been so long since I've watched the first season of it that I don't even remember what the show is about anymore.

Meah wrote:

I can't wait for Date A Live 3 ep 6-12, the only arc that matters.
Tobiichi Origami <3

Is this the show that has that rape Queen with a revolver gun?

new sig good
railey2 suck it

Aiseca wrote:

Meah wrote:

I can't wait for Date A Live 3 ep 6-12, the only arc that matters.
Tobiichi Origami <3

Is this the show that has that rape Queen with a revolver gun?

Yeah

Somebody forgot to change the title of this thread in time https://old.ppy.sh/forum/p/6983963

This is how I imagine mania players.

This is how I imagine mania players

awwww! only weirdos here

Someone should try this.

yes

CSGO on tablet.
Good luck with the pad if that'll survive the pen tapping

Oi LazerLove, your daddy Walter T. from the #spanish channul is watching you....
Don't be a meanie 😂

Aiseca wrote:

Oi LazerLove, your daddy Walter T. from the #spanish channul is watching you....
Don't be a meanie 😂

oh god please no

Aiseca wrote:

Oi LazerLove, your daddy Walter T. from the #spanish channul is watching you....
Don't be a meanie 😂

Too late.

Seriously tho, LazerLove don't go ham and post like you did earlier, it's actually annoying to scroll down too long.

Please, follow the forum guidelines as much as you can to aviod these kind of hassles.

You may have seen other Denizens do some shitposts but at least they try to do it minimal.

------
Off Topic Creeper,
AI.

What happened? What did he do? Did I missed something?

tad01123 wrote:

What happened? What did he do? Did I missed something?

LazerLove says: Im a good boy, please dont kill me

that's me

I still have no idea what's going on.

tad01123 wrote:

I still have no idea what's going on.

I spammed the forum and they silenced me one day

the only thing I can do now is play osu and cry in spanish

Lazer is dead

Wait, are you Lazer?
Is this your other account?
You know that Osu have rules against multi accounting, right?

tad01123 wrote:

Wait, are you Lazer?
Is this your other account?
You know that Osu have rules against multi accounting, right?

I have more than 3 accounts lol

multi acc bannable

Im a bad boy

-disappears-

multi non-shitpost bannable

new ot law

OH SHIT

YOU BETTER RUN, BOI

I liked the ghostbusters reboot

Winnyace wrote:

I liked the ghostbusters reboot

should'a posted that in the confession thread

Winnyace wrote:

I liked the ghostbusters reboot

That's basically a sin.

LazerLove wrote:

-breathe intensely-

Hola amigo! ☺️

Aiseca wrote:

LazerLove wrote:

-breathe intensely-

Hola amigo! ☺️

Hola!

I dont know why they teach you spanish is a useless language, who would want to go to Latin America if you can stay in the United States? It is only useful to talk with those who cross the border looking for a better life, lets be realistic nobody wants to come here... its just my opinion

Im not mad at you