00:12:129 (12129|0,12129|5,12129|2,12129|1,12129|4,12129|6) - Since I'm very noob on LN, I cannot recognize rhythm easily about these LNs' end. I think it'll be better expressing vocal rhythm same as Love+ difficulty for intuition, or you can nerf vocal rhythm from Love+.
01:31:192 - I prefer add jack here too, like these notes 01:30:254 (90254|1,90254|4,90358|1,90358|4) for expressing vocal rhythm. Anyway I can understand why you didn't add jack here, it's up to you :)
02:09:495 ~ 02:42:626 - Overmapped I guess. Recommending re-organize this part. I don't need delay patterns and ズレpatterns(sorry I don't know what it calls for english) here, for exampe: 02:16:147 (136147|2,136213|1,136278|3,136343|0,136408|2) 02:21:821 (141821|2,141886|0,141952|2,142017|0,142017|3) 02:30:039 (150039|0,150169|2,150234|3,150300|0,150365|1,150365|2) 02:30:886 (150886|1,150886|0,150952|2,151082|0,151082|3,151213|1) 02:32:843 (152843|0,152908|2,152973|3,153039|1,153104|0) 02:38:386 (158386|1,158517|1,158582|3,158647|1,158713|2,158713|3)
02:14:647 (134647|1,134647|3,134713|2,134713|0,134778|2) - What it represents? Cymbals? Especially 02:14:713 (134713|2,134778|2) - these notes are really not good idea imo.
01:17:322 ~ 01:18:496 - handling 1/8 trills by one hand is not good idea imo. Suggestion: https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/18285288/0df5
01:07:931 (67931|1) - move to column 1, it'll be help for key balance since column 1 is empty from 01:06:887 until 01:08:452
01:06:496 (66496|0,66626|0,66757|0) - avoiding triple minijack? If you don't have any special reason to represent triple minijack here, I recommend 01:06:757 (66757|0) - move this note to column 4
01:42:217 - Piano sound is exist here imo, Also Extra diff is quad here too
01:47:256 (107256|5), 01:49:131 (109131|6) - I expressed string sound here