DO YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY BOILS MY BRUSSEL SPROUTS
PEOPLE WITH THE NAMES OF ANIME/FRANCHISE CHARACTERS THAT
DONT HAVE MOTHERFUCKING AVATARS OF THE APPLICABLE CHARACTER LIKE HOW SHURELIA HAS A PICTURE OF GODDAMN NEPTUNIA INSTEAD OF SHURELIA
LIKE HOW I HAVE A PROFILE PICTURE OF GODDAMN KANAME BUCCANEER INSTEAD OF MEGUMI.
Ok, I'll be a bit more serious. I think I'm quite good at getting through challenges and binge-watching psychology documentaries and YouTube videos (especially about abnormal behaviours). And I'm amazing at being indecisive!
Relating to people through genuine emotion, and actual empathy.
I know that I can understand people easily by taking on perspectives, but... not like that.
I don't know what they actually feel. I can only imagine. I keep aggravating people close to me, because they think i'd understand, but when they see how i act...
...they can't help but think i "don't care". emotions don't have to drive concern and care. the simple fundamental desire of "making things right" can be a purely logical one.
but i don't seem to show it. thst's what emotions are for. people can infer what you think by observing and relating with how you feel. i can only do the reverse. i consider what thought patterns lead to what they're displaying. i infer what they would reasonably feel from how they think and from what they believe.
other people can do both, provided they can effectively analyze with a detached perspective.
i wish i could understand you guys more. it's why i enjoy discussion. i feel as if i were an android struggling to be human.
- - -
The thoughts and experiences had are one's creative fodder.
The phantasmic world sought is one's own solace to solder.
Ahhh... well, in a weird way, it's something similar to Achro. Except, instead of not understanding others, I dont understand myself. I dont really feel what I feel, but I'm very good at empathy and it's actually one of the only ways I can figure out what's going on with my emotions. If I imagine someone else in my spot things make a bit more sense.
But I've talked about that before, so, ah....
I'm very all or nothing? Even with my attention span. I have ADHD and that makes it so either I cant focus on one thing at all or I hyper focus on it. In the same way, unless I commit myself to something, I find absolutely no way to interest myself in it. And it has to be a hard commitment. Like, do this every day for specific reasons and really work at it type of commitment.
I think it's a bad thing because it really limits me. I dont know much else past the things I focus on. Sure, I'm usually quite good at those specific things, but outside of those I'm pretty clueless and limited in my palette of experiences. It really bothers me because it makes it hard to socialize sometimes. Like, what do I even talk about with most people? I can manage small talk but my actual knowledge of stuff is quite literally limited to visual art, philosophy, physics, singing, martial arts, and video games. Do you know how hard it is to find people who are interested in talking about any of those things? It's not super easy...
This is a tough one. My ideas of being moral are quite different to other people's, from what I know.
I try to be nice to people but also be truthful with how I feel. If something, someone, an action, etc, really bugs me, then I will say so (..as long as it's online, I'm way too socially anxious to in real life at the moment). I believe that this helps people develop, even if they take it as 'being mean'.
That's just the sort of lifestyle I'm used to - I often get criticised by a friend for how I act in (e.g. social) situations and I appreciate the criticism as it allows me to grow (or, at least, try). Even if these criticisms are small things such as how quiet I am, or my body language when I'm anxious. I suck at socialising, I've always known that, but knowing specific areas I fail in is helpful. I criticise myself, too.
Sugarcoating and hiding stuff, on the other hand, is extremely unhelpful. I can't understand why people prefer this to just outright being truthful. Pretending you have no issues doesn't mean that you have no issues. I actually see that as an issue itself!
Personal development is more important to me than my dear feelings being protected.
In conclusion, I don't think of myself as morally inferior, I think of myself as morally different. But this isn't really something I've thought about in the past.