For the last 4 months, I've been actively using Blogilates as the go-to fitness tool, mainly because the struggle in keeping a constant weight has been an issue since the later years of high school; gone from being anorexic to slightly overweight within the span of 2-3 years. The problem before was that I barely had any physical activity outside of the occasional badminton or tennis, and now that friends have moved away for post-secondary and branched off, it's become more difficult. So I made the decision this summer to start working out at home, of which I was opposed to simply, but Cassey Ho and Blogilates changed that. Despite only following her calendars for 4 months, I can confidently say that I am currently in the best shape and place in my life. Exercising on a daily basis has done wonders for keeping the balance of being mentally and physically stable (ര̀ᴗര́)و
Shga wrote:
This is not how I improved myself, these are just the problems I am facing
My mental health is going to deep shit. I constantly feel pressured by other expectations (good grades, lots of studying, pass my university exams etc) and I always fall short. I am trying to perform well at tests and stuff but I get so anxious that I forget things I remembered a second ago. There's been some really unsatisfying grades that I have told no one about. I try to put a happy face on for everyone around me, trying to hide my unhappiness to not affect others negatively but I am afraid that this cover will not last forever. I've been feeling gloomy and I just want to give up on everything. Any advice?
Just wanted to say that you're never alone in this kind of situation, and that many others have shared a similar experience, if not identical. Can't say that I have any specific words of wisdom aside from ridding yourself of others' expectations and simply focusing on what you believe you can do and are happy with.
Reading your excerpt, I understand what you've gone through and can relate to a certain extent, not entirely. Back in the 2nd year of university, I unfortunately succumbed to a major episode of depression that lasted nearly an entire year, and often times, whenever there was a trigger like failing assignments, my mind would automatically be sent to having suicidal thoughts. And during this time, I isolated myself. One day, suddenly had an epiphany moment where I realized it was either continue attending university for a program I did not enjoy anymore in an effort to impress my parents, but at the cost of being depressed. Or, I could stand up for myself, be selfish for once and do whatever I thought would me happy in the long-run. Ended up dropping out, going to college closer to home, and have never looked back.
Like I said, not entirely identical to your situation, but there are similarities here-and-there. In a nutshell, work for
yourself and nobody else; achieve
your expectations and try not to focus on what others may think of you.