OnosakiHito wrote:

Other TBATs were quicker. lol
Congratulation!

OnosakiHito wrote:

Disqualified for some reasons I'm going to state down below.

Didn't played all maps before, that's why I haven't stated any concerns in my previous post.

[General]

All maps are made really nice. But the density of notes in Futsuu and Muzukashii is pretty high. The maps are mainly mapped in a consecutive way without any breaks, which makes the maps have no emphasis or bigger impact on certain parts. Especially in Muzukashii this is visible, since you map constently with 1/2 on calm, normal and kiai parts. For example at 00:57:062, where the part becomes calmer than previous one. You didn't tune down the density here, even though the song calls for it. I will give you some diff specific examples down below.



Additional to this, I'm concerned about the spread in this set. Futsuu to Muzukashii is quite high, compared to the others:


ND: (Kantan 193) ← 94 → (Futsuu 287) ← 265 → (Muzukashii 552 ) ← 195 → (Oni 747)


[ Futsuu]

SPOILER

Let's start with Futsuu first. As I said, I will give you some examples what notes you can remove here.

00:01:453~00:12:245 - Look at Kantan's note density. It is much lower than Futsuus, and Muzukashii has the exact same pattern as Oni. Take this part from Futsuu and put it into Muzukashii. You should remap this part in Futsuu so the spread is better to Kantan and Muzu.
{ Following notes can be deleted to have 2/1 breaks between the patterns.
00:14:257 (2) -
00:17:184 (2) -
00:20:111 (2) -
00:23:038 (2) -
} You mapped to the high pitch, but even without these, it still sounds good and gives the part 00:24:867 a biigger impact.
{
00:31:087 (1) -
00:34:379 (1) - move to 00:34:745 if move this, break is long and feel little weird to me.
} 1/1 patterns are easy, yet the alternate a lot. That's why we should take care of it and have at least some bigger breaks. Current one should still fit to the beat but also kinda to the vocal.
{
00:37:306 (1) - Deleting this will make the upcoming part have a bigger impact. This part is really calm, so avoiding to have 2/1 consecutive mapping is a good way to get emphasis. It also fits pretty well to the vocal and differs the parts 00:36:574 and 00:38:038 really nice from each other.
00:43:160 (1) - ^
}
00:51:209 - Kiai can be kept as it is. Now it should be much more emphasized, since the similar pattern at 00:13:160 got less notes. In this way, kiai acts as "rise of notes".
00:57:062 - Consider making the kiai end here instead at 01:02:550. The song becomes much calmer here. In this way next kiai at 01:02:916 becomes stronger as well. Not a must though.

[ Muzukashii]

SPOILER

00:01:453~00:12:245 - This part should carry now Futsuu's patterns.
{ Similar to Futsuu.
00:14:074 (2) -
00:17:001 (2) -
00:17:550 (1) -
00:19:928 (2) -
00:20:477 (1) -
00:22:855 (2) -
00:23:404 (1) -
} The thing is now, after you delete these notes, the impact at 00:24:867 will be much bigger because, this part contains more notes.
00:29:257 - Recommending this to avoid having too long 1/2 patterns. Marked (1) is K.

00:34:379 - Same as above. some changed both part.

00:36:574~00:48:282 - Compare Futsuu with Muzukashii. You will notice quick that there is a huge difference in difficulty and ND. Please delete more notes in this part.
00:57:062 - Consider making the kiai end here instead at 01:02:550. The song becomes much calmer here. In this way next kiai at 01:02:916 becomes stronger as well. Not a must though.
00:57:062~00:59:989 - In Futsuu I said you can keep the mapping as it is, but in Muzukashii you have to make this part less dense. It would fit better so the song and give upcoming part a bigger impact.

[ Oni]

SPOILER

00:36:574~00:48:282 - You might want to lower the note density here, too. Since in Muzu you had to do it as well.
00:57:062 - Consider making the kiai end here instead at 01:02:550. The song becomes much calmer here. In this way next kiai at 01:02:916 becomes stronger as well. Not a must though.
00:57:062~00:59:989 - You might want to consider deleting some notes due to similar reasons I provided in Muzukashii.

i want to keep it.
cuz i was completed Oni.


I can just repeat myself that the maps are in general really good. The song is also great. Even more does it make me sad to unrank it. lol
But you have to take care of possible spread issues and try to make patterns / stanzas / parts become more emphasized. Else the map becomes monotonically, which scratches on the quality itself.

Everything I said above should be followed and applied to the second half of the beatmap as well. If you don't want to change something, try to have own ideas to fix the spread issue and have more breaks. After you changed it, Modders and BATs should look at it and bubble / rank again.
Good luck.

Spy wrote:

R.I.P.

OnosakiHito wrote:

ND was previously this:
(Kantan 193) ← 94 → (Futsuu 287) ← 265 → (Muzukashii 552 ) ← 195 → (Oni 747)

Now it's this after changes:
(Kantan 169) ← 107 → (Futsuu 276) ← 234 → (Muzukashii 510) ← 237 → (Oni 747)

Great work Reyshel. Now the spread is much better than before as you can see above. In general Kantan could have some less notes, but there aren't further changes needed, since else we might change the map too much. Just keep an eye on the spread next time! I hope you learned a lot in our IRC talk. :3
小野崎は本当に嬉しいです。今のスプリードはいいとＲＡＮＫＡＢＬＥです。Ｒｅｙさん、お疲れです。
I hope you are as satisfied as I am.

SPOILER

14:59 OnosakiHito: こんにちはＲｅｙさん。えっと・・・俺の日本語ＬＶＬは小さいです。だから、僕が英語を作ります。それはいいか？
15:00 OnosakiHito: もしかして「英本」もいいかｗ
15:00 ReySHeL: こんにちわ小野崎さん。　いいですよー
15:01 OnosakiHito: First: Ｕｎｒａｎｋを本当にごめんなさい、でも... it was important.
15:01 ReySHeL: うん >.<
15:02 OnosakiHito: Second: Reyさんの話「i dont want to remove there notes.」は憂わしいです。
15:03 OnosakiHito: Muzukashii must have some deletions.
15:03 OnosakiHito: スプリードはまだまだいいです。
15:03 ReySHeL: はい
15:03 OnosakiHito: You deleted some notes in Futsuu = OK, super
15:04 ReySHeL: thanks
15:04 ReySHeL: Muzukashiiもchanged
15:04 OnosakiHito: But no deletion on Muzu = Not OK because, spread can becomme bigger
15:04 ReySHeL: ;w;
15:04 OnosakiHito: 00:14:074 (2) - You don't have to delete if you don't want.
15:05 OnosakiHito: But you should delete other notes then in this part.
15:06 ReySHeL: 00:13:709 - i can delete this note
15:06 OnosakiHito: 難しいのＮＯＴＥＳは本当に密度の高いです。
15:06 OnosakiHito: うん、それはいいです。
15:06 ReySHeL: はい
15:06 OnosakiHito: I don't want to force you or feel sad.
15:07 OnosakiHito: I want you to be happy about changes as well,
15:07 OnosakiHito: that's why you can choose what you delete.
15:08 ReySHeL: はい
15:09 OnosakiHito: Problem is: If we don't delete some notes and make spread a bit better,
15:09 OnosakiHito: the set will be unqualfied again.
15:10 OnosakiHito: I don't want that lol
15:12 OnosakiHito: だから、難しいの密度の高いをＣＨＥＣＫします。(That's why you should check Muzu's ND again.)
15:12 ReySHeL: わかりました
15:13 ReySHeL: what is ND?
15:13 OnosakiHito: Note Density
15:13 OnosakiHito: (密度の高い)
15:13 ReySHeL: oh
15:13 OnosakiHito: 俺が待ってるです。
15:14 ReySHeL: 後どれぐらい note へらす？
15:14 OnosakiHito: ()dore
15:14 ReySHeL: あと
15:15 OnosakiHito: ああ
15:16 OnosakiHito: ん。。。
15:16 OnosakiHito: I don't know. Depends.
15:17 ReySHeL: 00:13:160 - ~ 00:24:867 - ここですよね？
15:17 OnosakiHito: Just try to make the notes fit to the songs calm, normal and kiai parts.
15:17 ReySHeL: kiai too?
15:17 OnosakiHito: Yes.
15:17 OnosakiHito: kiai not.
15:17 ReySHeL: or this part only
15:17 OnosakiHito: it#s fine
15:17 ReySHeL: k
15:17 OnosakiHito: I will give you timlines.
15:18 ReySHeL: たぶん　数分で終わります
15:19 OnosakiHito: 00:13:160 - ~ 00:24:867 - Some deletions like 00:13:709 (1) -
15:19 OnosakiHito: 00:36:574 - ~ 00:48:282 - Changed already...?
15:20 OnosakiHito: 00:57:062 - ~ 00:59:989 - Delete some notes as well. Calm part.
15:20 ReySHeL: 00:36:574 - ~ changed already
15:20 ReySHeL: だいぶnotes へらしました
15:21 OnosakiHito: 01:26:331 - ~ 01:38:038 - must delete some. Same notes like in Oni.
15:21 OnosakiHito: 00:36:483 - Changed? Okay!
15:21 ReySHeL: yes
15:22 OnosakiHito: 01:26:331 - ｋｋｋはいいです。Just delete some 1/2.
15:22 OnosakiHito: 1/4 is fine.
15:23 ReySHeL: 01:26:696 - k k k Rhythm?
15:23 OnosakiHito: 01:57:062 - ~ 02:02:184 - Delete just some notes. Don't need many.
15:25 OnosakiHito: いええ。僕の話は「ｋｋｋ1/4はいいです。でも1/2notesに削除する、お願いします。」
15:26 OnosakiHito: 01:32:001 (2,3,4) - good
15:26 OnosakiHito: 01:26:331 - ~ 01:30:721 - delete some 1/2 notes
15:26 ReySHeL: k
15:27 OnosakiHito: 01:57:062 - ~ 01:59:257 - try have less notes as well.
15:27 OnosakiHito: Everything else is fine!
15:28 ReySHeL:
15:29 ReySHeL: 01:59:623 - this kkk is ok?
15:29 OnosakiHito: yes.
15:29 OnosakiHito: you can keep if you want.
15:31 OnosakiHito: Sounds like much, but actually there is just a small amount of notes you would need to delete.
15:31 OnosakiHito: Nothing that changes your map really much. Your main patterns and beats remain the same.
15:32 ReySHeL: はい
15:33 ReySHeL: 00:13:160 - ~ 00:24:867 - fixed 01:57:062 - ~ 01:59:989 - fixed 01:26:331 - here now
15:36 OnosakiHito: ok
15:39 ReySHeL: ok fixed. update?
15:39 ReySHeL: max combo: 515
15:43 OnosakiHito: let me check
15:43 OnosakiHito: wait
15:43 ReySHeL: kk
15:44 OnosakiHito: Previously: 265 differenece
15:44 OnosakiHito: Now: 239
15:44 OnosakiHito: still high, but better now!
15:44 OnosakiHito: Let's try.
15:44 ReySHeL: xD
15:44 ReySHeL: update しますね
15:45 OnosakiHito: ok~
15:46 ReySHeL: updated~
15:53 ReySHeL: 02:08:770 - i forgot remove this part lol
15:54 OnosakiHito: sure, just remove
15:54 OnosakiHito: lol
15:55 ReySHeL: yea lol
16:02 OnosakiHito: How do you feel about the map now?
16:03 ReySHeL: good
16:03 ReySHeL: いい感じにnotesをへらせました
16:03 OnosakiHito: 本当にほんとう？
16:03 ReySHeL: yes!
16:03 ReySHeL: 小野崎さんは？
16:03 OnosakiHito: よかったです！
16:03 OnosakiHito: うん！僕も
16:03 ReySHeL: xD
16:04 ReySHeL: ありがとう！
16:09 OnosakiHito: http://puu.sh/b3c5h/03364a03a3.png
16:09 OnosakiHito: much better now
16:09 OnosakiHito: lol
16:10 OnosakiHito: Kantan and Futsuu is close to each other, but well,
16:10 OnosakiHito: Muzu has much more notes, so that's normal.
16:11 OnosakiHito: But you can consider having some deletions in Kantan if you want. Example: 00:36:574 - having more 4/1 patterns than 2/1.
16:11 OnosakiHito: Similar to Futsuu and Muzu. I won't force you here this time. But maybe think about it.
16:12 ReySHeL: ふむ
16:12 OnosakiHito: ｗｗｗｗｗｗ
16:12 ReySHeL: ｗｗｗ
16:13 ReySHeL: i think kantan is ok owo
16:13 OnosakiHito: Kantan: http://puu.sh/b3chZ/fa542327ce.jpg because of this
16:13 ReySHeL: lol
16:13 OnosakiHito: You see?
16:13 OnosakiHito: No bigger break than 4/1
16:13 OnosakiHito: lol
16:14 OnosakiHito: I didn't noticed it before, because I saw problems in Futsuu and Muzu.
16:14 ReySHeL: i see
16:20 OnosakiHito: p/3324352
16:21 ReySHeL: >.<
16:21 OnosakiHito: I recommend to have some deletions in Kantan.
16:22 OnosakiHito: but for now:
16:22 OnosakiHito: お疲れ！
16:22 ReySHeL: ありがとう！
16:23 OnosakiHito: 今から僕は本当に嬉しいです。
16:23 ReySHeL: それは良かった
16:23 OnosakiHito: ｗ
16:24 ReySHeL: 小野崎さんは これに buble / rank できない？
16:24 ReySHeL: bubble*
16:25 OnosakiHito: できないです。それはＢＡＴの役です。
16:26 OnosakiHito: After Kantan got some deletions, I'm sure TKS will check!
16:26 OnosakiHito: rank will be easy.
16:27 ReySHeL: kantan need fix?
16:28 OnosakiHito: Some deletions like in Fu and Mu.
16:28 OnosakiHito: You see the spread.
16:28 OnosakiHito: Really sorry that I didn't saw it before!
16:28 OnosakiHito: but it shouldn't be a problem if you check it....?
16:30 ReySHeL: idk where part delete kantan..
16:30 OnosakiHito: Ooh....
16:30 OnosakiHito: should I... help?
16:31 ReySHeL: please help ;w;
16:32 OnosakiHito: xD
16:32 OnosakiHito: ok
16:32 ReySHeL: thanks!
16:33 OnosakiHito: 00:13:160 - ~ 00:24:867 - Same like before. Some deletion are possible. Example:
16:33 OnosakiHito: 00:15:721 (3) -
16:33 OnosakiHito: 00:18:648 (1) - change k
16:34 OnosakiHito: 00:21:574 (3) - delete
16:34 OnosakiHito: Try it. Maybe you like it.
16:35 ReySHeL: うーむ..
16:36 ReySHeL: さみしいｗ
16:43 OnosakiHito: lol
16:43 OnosakiHito: 00:36:574 - ~ 00:48:282 - You have to delete notes.
16:44 OnosakiHito: Really calm part, so you need 8/1 breaks. Example:
16:44 OnosakiHito: 00:38:038 (5,1) -
16:44 OnosakiHito: 00:40:965 (2,1) -
16:45 ReySHeL: delete?
16:46 OnosakiHito: Yes.
16:46 OnosakiHito: This might sound now strange to you.
16:46 OnosakiHito: But that's what a Kantan should have
16:47 ReySHeL: oh
16:47 ReySHeL: 00:43:892 (1,2) - not delete?
16:49 OnosakiHito: You can do this: http://puu.sh/b3epa/2c0c5b7098.png
16:49 OnosakiHito: 00:42:428 - ~ 00:48:282 -
16:50 OnosakiHito: Ah, summan, going to eat.
16:50 OnosakiHito: back in some minutes!
16:50 ReySHeL: kk!
16:51 ReySHeL: いってらｗ
17:08 OnosakiHito: ok!
17:08 OnosakiHito: back
17:08 ReySHeL: okaeri!
17:08 OnosakiHito: thanks~
17:08 ReySHeL: kanban deleted some notes
17:08 ReySHeL: 182 combo now
17:09 OnosakiHito: 00:13:160 - ~ 00:24:867 - Some deleted?
17:09 ReySHeL: yes
17:09 OnosakiHito: 00:36:574 - ~ 00:48:282 - Some deleted?
17:09 ReySHeL: yes
17:09 ReySHeL: 00:27:062 - 00:32:916 - too
17:10 OnosakiHito: Perfect!
17:10 OnosakiHito: You understood what I mean.
17:10 ReySHeL: thanks
17:10 OnosakiHito: Kiai is fine. Maybe notes like this 00:56:696 (2) - can be deleted.
17:11 OnosakiHito: Fits well to song, but such notes aren't always needed.
17:11 OnosakiHito: In Kantan, you don't map to all sounds.
17:11 ReySHeL: oh
17:11 OnosakiHito: 00:57:062 - ~ 00:59:989 - less notes like in muzu / futsuu
17:12 OnosakiHito: Maybe 00:57:062 - ~ 01:01:452 - is better.
17:12 OnosakiHito: 01:08:404 (1) - same as before.
17:13 ReySHeL: deleted both
17:13 OnosakiHito: http://puu.sh/b3fQC/0e08bb567a.png 01:08:770 - ~ 01:14:623 -
17:13 OnosakiHito: ^ So you have here 01:09:867 - a break.
17:14 ReySHeL: http://puu.sh/b3fQC/0e08bb567a.png　どこだ
17:15 OnosakiHito: 01:14:623 ~ - 01:26:331 - Better remove some, because look at Futsuu. A bit similar.
17:15 OnosakiHito: そこに　01:08:770 -
17:17 ReySHeL: 01:08:404 - d 01:08:770 - k ?
17:18 OnosakiHito: 貴方のidea?
17:18 ReySHeL: ちがう
17:18 ReySHeL: http://puu.sh/b3fQC/0e08bb567a.png
17:18 OnosakiHito: oh
17:18 ReySHeL: これがわからない
17:18 ReySHeL: ばしょ
17:18 OnosakiHito: 01:07:306 - d
17:18 OnosakiHito: 01:08:404 - k
17:18 OnosakiHito: 01:08:770 - d
17:18 OnosakiHito: 01:09:501 - k
17:19 OnosakiHito: 01:10:599 - d
17:19 OnosakiHito: 01:10:965 - k
17:19 OnosakiHito: 01:11:696 - ...
17:20 OnosakiHito: 01:07:306 - ~ 01:14:623 - はこの芸です｜http://puu.sh/b3fQC/0e08bb567a.png
17:20 OnosakiHito: あああああああああああああああああ
17:20 OnosakiHito: すまんすまん、いええいええいええいええ
17:20 OnosakiHito: 違うです。
17:20 ReySHeL:
17:20 OnosakiHito: 僕はわるいｗｗｗ
17:20 ReySHeL: おｋ
17:21 ReySHeL: ｗｗｗｗ
17:21 OnosakiHito: 01:08:770 - ~ 01:14:623 - このＴｉｍｅｌｉｎｅはいまの芸です｜http://puu.sh/b3fQC/0e08bb567a.png
17:22 OnosakiHito: 一番ドンのＴｉｍｅｌｉｎｅは　01:08:770　- です。
17:22 OnosakiHito: 01:08:770 -
17:22 OnosakiHito: 今、Ｒｅｙさんは分かる？ｗ
17:23 ReySHeL: えっと
17:23 OnosakiHito: はい？
17:23 ReySHeL: いちばんひだりのdが
17:23 ReySHeL: 01:08:770 -
17:23 ReySHeL: ここ？
17:23 OnosakiHito: はい
17:23 ReySHeL: やっとわかったｗ
17:23 OnosakiHito: XD
17:25 ReySHeL: nice rhythm
17:25 ReySHeL:
17:25 OnosakiHito: \:3/
17:26 OnosakiHito: 01:14:623 - ~ 01:26:331 - Delete some notes. Density is similar to Futsuu.
17:26 OnosakiHito: Example:
17:29 OnosakiHito: http://puu.sh/b3gNj/dd1d7dfdee.png
17:29 OnosakiHito: hidari d ha 01:14:623 (1) -
17:29 OnosakiHito: migi d ha 01:26:331 (1) -
17:29 OnosakiHito: All don are finisher
17:29 ReySHeL: ok
17:30 OnosakiHito: Just example. You can make your own patterns if you don't like.
17:30 ReySHeL: わかりました
17:33 OnosakiHito: 01:49:745 (3,4) - Recommend to delete.
17:33 OnosakiHito: 01:42:062 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,1,2,1,2) - This pattern was really long.
17:33 OnosakiHito: So having a big break at 01:49:745 - is important.
17:34 ReySHeL: ok
17:34 OnosakiHito: 01:56:696 (1) - can be delete like before.
17:34 OnosakiHito: 01:57:062 - Same like 00:57:062 -
17:35 ReySHeL: yes
17:35 OnosakiHito: 02:08:404 (1) - Maybe delete like before.
17:35 OnosakiHito: everything else is fine!
17:35 ReySHeL: xD
17:35 OnosakiHito: もうやったですか？やったか？！あああああ
17:36 ReySHeL: やったｗ　
17:36 ReySHeL: 01:14:623 - いまここ編集中ｗｗ
17:36 OnosakiHito: 神様お願いします！力をgive ussss
17:36 ReySHeL: ｗｗｗ
17:36 OnosakiHito: ()()中
17:36 ReySHeL: へんしゅう
17:37 OnosakiHito: 編集
17:37 OnosakiHito: 編集中
17:37 ReySHeL: yea
17:37 OnosakiHito: ok w
17:38 ReySHeL: ok fixed w
17:38 OnosakiHito: Everzthing finished_
17:39 ReySHeL: updateしますね
17:39 OnosakiHito: ok~
17:41 ReySHeL: 01:49:745 (3,4) - i want this cuz 00:49:745 (3,4) -
17:41 ReySHeL:
17:42 ReySHeL: 01:44:623 - deleted
17:42 OnosakiHito: Maybe delete 01:50:843 (5) - then?
17:42 OnosakiHito: oooh
17:43 OnosakiHito: you deleted 01:44:623 - okay!
17:43 OnosakiHito: Good! THta's what I wanted to suggest before.
17:43 ReySHeL:
17:43 ReySHeL: thanks!
17:43 OnosakiHito: You understand the way I see it better and better!
17:43 ReySHeL: www
17:43 OnosakiHito: :3
17:44 ReySHeL: updated!
17:44 OnosakiHito: niceeeee
17:44 OnosakiHito: 192 -> 169
17:45 ReySHeL: xD
17:48 OnosakiHito: 01:14:623 - ~ 01:26:331 - Well, still consecutive mapping in this part. main beat is 4/1, so having bigger breaks would be better. But...
17:48 OnosakiHito: if you really want it, let's keep it.
17:48 ReySHeL: ok
17:48 OnosakiHito: Change or keep?
17:49 ReySHeL: keep
17:49 OnosakiHito: ok
17:51 ReySHeL: waiting for TKS now?

(You can kudosu this, since my previous post was excluded of it)

Tasha wrote:

There's one small thing I noticed while rechecking, and I'm fairly sure I'm right on this.

01:21:087 (6) - This is incorrectly snapped in both the Muzukashii and Oni. The note doesn't hit the 1/3 tick and actually starts on the 1/2 tick at 01:21:026.

02:21:087 (6) - Same as above.

Get back to me once you look at this and I'll rebubble.

Tasha wrote:

Boop

OnosakiHito wrote:

See how fast it can be Reyshel \:D/

mintong89 wrote:

Alright! Checked and everything is fine. Enjoy your rank.

Ranked!

qoot8123 wrote:

recongrats ~