APRIL FOOLS

t-those l-l-lips >/////////////<;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

You fooled me.

legit

Shellghost wrote:

You fooled me.

yes

HAHAHAHAHA dont be gay mang

Requesting BL fanfics

deliver brian

I don't understand the love between two boys well enough to portray it in writing

thelewa wrote:

oh shiet

our lord and savior.

IppE wrote:

our lord and savior.

Holy shit

Best fanfic, Billy my hero

inb4 ultimate muscle roller legend

i have no idea what this is

ColdTooth wrote:

i have no idea what this is

once again

damnit doommusic

Currently mapping this:



it's so fucking deep

UnderminE wrote:

Currently mapping this:



it's so fucking deep

OH GOD. MY INSIDES.

UnderminE wrote:

Currently mapping this:



it's so fucking deep

wtf is this

color pins a thread about himself

hahah what the fuck

UnderminE wrote:

Currently mapping this:



it's so fucking deep

How the heck can it survive on youtube? = .=

its not april fools anymore get this shit out of valhalla

Blue Stig wrote:

inb4 cleanup
Hail Shellghost

Shellghost and Mr. Color for president

I'll say I left this for ironic value but really I just don't feel like locking this thread when I can't/don't know how to unpin it.

edit the op you noob

I don't see anything which indicates pinning or unpinning ;~~~~;

Mr Color best OT mod

titles says it all; this is the truth.

sticky & lock.

Shellghost wrote:

I don't see anything which indicates pinning or unpinning ;~~~~;

Forum-specific mods can't pin threads, not even in their own forum, because phpbb.

Phpbb is my sound of deploration.

the shitposting is real

ColdTooth wrote:

i have no idea what this is

I just clicked out of wonder

woah oh oh ohaoohhh

Bassist Vinyl wrote:

woah oh oh ohaoohhh

Who are you?

thx lewy for giving me an idea for december 28th

Niokin wrote:

ColdTooth wrote:

Who are you?

I was being silly, thanks for telling me captain obvious

do people still say captain obvious, no shit sherlock and assorted meymeys

no shit sherlock must be popular considering the tv series still going on around

and he doesn't shit in the show

Lewder wrote:

do people still say captain obvious, no shit sherlock and assorted meymeys

what the fuck does "assorted meymeys" mean

ColdTooth wrote:

Lewder wrote:

do people still say captain obvious, no shit sherlock and assorted meymeys

what the fuck does "assorted meymeys" mean

I have no idea

Lewder wrote:

do people still say captain obvious, no shit sherlock and assorted meymeys

Why do you group up actual societal memes from over a decade ago with internet maymays?

Shellghost wrote:

Lewder wrote:

do people still say captain obvious, no shit sherlock and assorted meymeys

Why do you group up actual societal memes from over a decade ago with internet maymays?

by now they're the same and it should terrify you. in cheap tourist gift shops you used to be able to buy "societal memes" on t-shirts whereas now you get trollfaces and guy fawkes masks

Lewder wrote:

by now they're the same and it should terrify you. in cheap tourist gift shops you used to be able to buy "societal memes" on t-shirts whereas now you get trollfaces and guy fawkes masks

i am scared and i have no idea what is going on

coolstorybro amirite guys doge ftw ahaha xD OPPA COLDTOOTH STYLE!!! #420 #doinyermom

mathexpert wrote:

coolstorybro amirite guys doge ftw ahaha xD OPPA COLDTOOTH STYLE!!! #420 #doinyermom

the fuck am I reading

mathexpert wrote:

coolstorybro amirite guys doge ftw ahaha xD OPPA COLDTOOTH STYLE!!! #420 #doinyermom

i have never xD'd so hard in my entire life.

Bassist Vinyl wrote:

mathexpert wrote:

coolstorybro amirite guys doge ftw ahaha xD OPPA COLDTOOTH STYLE!!! #420 #doinyermom

i have never xD'd so hard in my entire life.

People hate like me :-)

hi horses

They're fake, Mr Ed will always be the only legitimate talking horse

Chokladboll wrote:

hi horses

xD

goodbye pin

w0w fk u millhiore

This thread needs to be stickied

fuck. This was better pinned

this thread was never good it had mr color and best in the same line.

It had Mr Color and mod on the same line.

Wait.

it had mr color on it

oh wait

ONCE UPON A TIME, A FINN MADE A THREAD. TO THIS, ONE FOOLISH BUT NONETHELESS VERY HANDSOME MAN SAID:

Brian OA wrote:

Requesting BL fanfics

UPON HEARING THIS, THE MASSES RESPONDED:

Zeraph wrote:

deliver brian

HOWEVER, HE WAS BAFFLED BY THE REQUEST.

Brian OA wrote:

I don't understand the love between two boys well enough to portray it in writing

THE MAN DID NOT KNOW OF THIS JOB. But no longer.

This is a story of love and betrayal; a story about a man who most likely puts disgusting things in his mouth, such as frogs or dick, searching for his long lost love. This is the story of some French dude that makes a living by stabbing people to keep them in place, and a beautiful mangirl who had a hole in her chest.

This sure as hell is not your story.


...

SELECT YOUR SPAWN POINT

[] France
[] Finland
[] Australia
[] America
[] Africa


HEAVEN OR HELL, LET'S ROCK

Africa.

Screw BL, ebola-chan is best.

It was a bright morning. I'm saying that in a pejorative sense, of course. Every day of my life had been far too grim and dark to be called "bright." Whatever silver lining was left in this every day routine of mine was hardly something worth looking forward to.

Brushing those thoughts aside, I got up from the ground to find myself in a hut. The surely blinding sun peered through the rudimentary construction with ease, forcing me to wake up at a socially acceptable hour.

"...Not good."

I rubbed my eyes as I got up to confirm where I was.

My name is Jean Pierre "Coleur" Polnareff Mister. In my line of work, it's common to get kidnapped, and I'm sure some piece of shit just shipped me to Africa or something.

"Good morning, brother!" a voice called from outside, making me turn my face to the blinding light.

"Augh..." I immediately turned back to the darkness.

"Are you feeling alright?" the voice called out again. I looked up reservedly to confirm it was some small black child, probably around fourteen years old. He seemed like he was part of a tribe or something. Fucking Africa.

"...I'm fine, just... groggy."

The boy handed me a vase full of water. Fucking Africa.

I took a modest gulp at it and thought for a moment.

"Don't be shy brother, keep drinking if you need to!"

"..."

After downing some more water, I looked up to the child and—

[] Backhanded the snotty shit out of him
[] Thanked him and politely gleamed information from him
[] Fell in love with him
[] Died

BL time

fell in love with him

"I love you!" I immediately got up from the ground and embraced my newfound friend.

"I as well! For we are family." The child returned my embrace with heartfelt sincerity.

"No, not like that you buffoon!" I took a stance and tried to clarify the situation.

"H-Huh? What do you mean?"

"Well..."

I walked outside and grabbed a stick, then drew some patterns on the floor.

And then we fucked.


Needless to say, my nameless friend had died because my drill pierced his heavens. No, I'm serious; from his butt all the way to his brain. Dead. Gone. It was so fast I didn't even shed a tear.

"...This is why I must find that person..." I immediately recalled a promise I made a long time ago. This wasn't some childhood friend bullshit; this was a promise I made to someone because I knew they'd be the only one who could take a pounding from my dick. They were that depraved.

I immediately surveyed my surroundings and found a mere savanna around the area. There was no sign of other life forms or even a water source. I took some initiative and walked out into the distance, see if I could find anything without losing sight of the hut I came from.

However, I was almost immediately struck by hunger pangs and dizziness. If I had to say it would have to be my fault for having sex in Africa, but now's not the time for that. In only a few moments I fell to the dirt and passed out into a deep slumber.

...

"..."

"...uck, bola..."

"...Hnh...Hugh?!"

I woke up to a strange voice, but I found nobody there. In fact, nothing I knew was there; I seemed to have woken up somewhere else.

Getting up, I took a look around and found myself in the middle of a desert. Wherever I was, there was no way of figuring it out from here. That's what I thought anyway. All I really wanted to do was get back home and ban some faggots from an off topic board.

"SOKO MADE DA."

"NAHKNEE?" I turned around, excited that someone else knew nippon.

Wait a minute, since when did I know Japanese?

"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE MR. COLOR. I HAVE A BONE TO PICK WITH YOU."

"Huh? What did I do?"

A tall Indian man stood in front of me, puffing fire out of his armpits. He smiled at my question and responded:

"MAGICIAN'S RED!"

A maelstrom of fire emerged from the desert, but the flames only made the area around the Hindi man hotter, pretty much killing him right there on the spot before he could do anything.

"...Okay."

Eventuall I made it to a town where I found it fully stocked with most services. I checked my back pocket and found my credit card, which should hopefully maybe work here, wherever this is.

So I decided to

[] Rest at the inn
[] Rape and sack the town
[] Run to Israel
[] Erect a statue of something

going to bed, continuing tomorrow.

play magicka

Sonatora wrote:

play magicka

Thats not an option you illiterate twat.

Erect a statue. Of whatever.

I entered a daze, unsure of what to do. Grabbing a nearby bone and spotting a large rock on the way, I began using my penis drill along with the bone to carve out a shape.

Within a few hours I had made a statue of a cute girl, the sort you'd see in those moeshit Japanese shows. For some reason her hair split into two ends almost like cheese puffs. I'm not sure if that's just because I was practically nuts but alas.

...

[] rest
[] rape and pillage
[] israel
[] genuflect

rape and pillage

genuflect for lulz

I wonder how Brian learned enough about the love between two men to start writing about it

I wonder why this thread has been bu,ped

oh god yes please keep going brian

if that had different context...

DaddyCoolVipper wrote:

I wonder how Brian learned enough about the love between two men to start writing about it

I held hands with a man a few weeks ago. We locked fingers.

It was really lewd

Trash Boat wrote:

I wonder why this thread has been bu,ped

I'm teaching all of you nignogs how to necro a thread properly. Or at least how to respond to one properly.

You piece of shit



Anyway, I decidedly moved on to the village and stopped in front of a man.

"...Do you need something, boy?" The man asked me as I set my hands on the ground.

I knelt down and said:

"Sir, I'm going to need you to give me everything you own."

"..."

A moment of silence went by until the middle-aged man broke into laughter.

"Hahahaha, is this some kind of tv show? Are you recording me?"

"..."

I knew it was futile, but I got up and knelt down again. I know they never understand, but I needed to make a stand. Or kneel.

"Sir, if you don't comply—"

"Pfft." The old man scoffed.

I sighed and then got back up again. Then I knelt down once more. I continued the process, each time faster than the last. Before long I was genuflecting repeatedly with the force of a jackhammer.

"TAKATAKATAKATAKA MOTHERFUCKER" I bellowed as I tore apart the ground with my knee.

"W-What the hell—?!"

Repeating the motions, I stepped forward with the force of a thousand hamsters. I mowed the man down, pounding him into the pavement with ease. Knowing the rest of the town would be just as negligent, I moved on to destroying everything in a ten mile radius. I razed the entire city within a matter of hours, screwing men and women alike until nothing was left.

People would not speak about this because there were no people left that could do the speaking.

Thus I stood amongst the rubble, contemplating my work and noting that the statue I built earlier is now winking at me.

...

I should probably stop doing drugs.


[] Get a cab
[] Sleep
[] Rummage the wreckage for loot
[] Hit on the statue

Brain AO pls.

[] Get a cab
[] Sleep
[] Rummage the wreckage for loot
[X] Hit on the statue

For some reason or another I felt empty inside. Leveling population centers really takes the wind out of you, but I felt like my life had been absolutely meaningless. I mean, I've had cases where I spent a few days on something only to figure out it was pointless, but I felt as if I should've taken back everything I had done in my life.

As I stood on the wasteland with that solemn thought, my eyes wandered on to the statue I had erected earlier.

"Mmh?" I muttered to myself as I realized that the girl I had carved out of rock using my penis was, in fact, winking at me.

I remembered the advice I got from /r9k/ and winked back.

The stone girl waved her hips as she took some sexy strides towards me. I couldn't believe my eyes, but apparently my dick did.

With the force of a dozen Gurrens, my drill went straight for the stone statue. However, her cheese puff like twintails easily stopped my advances, ultimately slamming me on the ground.

"AGH! What are you doing!?"

She only giggled. That was enough for me to understand what's going on. As she shoved her cheese puffs into my rectum and boypussy, it struck me.

"EBOLA-CHAN! OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!" I cried, tears streaming down my face from pain and happiness.

And then...


I woke up.

"AH MOTHERFUCKER."

I awoke in my basement dwelling in Lyon, unsure on what to make of that dream.

My dick did, but then yet again it's an idiot.

Not a drill either. At least not in real life.


[] Breakfast
[] Moderate
[] Go around the hospital
[] Shoot up a school

i feel like moderating would be appropriate after such intense dreams.

Brian OA wrote:

"EBOLA-CHAN! OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!" I cried, tears streaming down my face from pain and happiness.

Also breakfast.