I went through something similar when I was 17 and then again when I was 18. Two 1 year long relationships that ended terribly. The first one I was with the girl for the entirety of the year and we were getting very serious about it (I mean talking about a future and such) one of her friends who I could never repay eventually told me that she knew about her cheating on me throughout the relationship and continuing to do so. I didn't really take it badly at all, but she ended up turning the breakup around on me (even though I did nothing wrong) and I lost all my friends and almost got the shit kicked out of me a few times. The second relationship was a girl I started talking to randomly online. She was in a very low mental state and was at the point of near suicide (I'm talking she was raped by her own father and a man in multiple occasions.) She admitted months later that the fact that I started talking to her and was so nice is the only reason that she kept from doing something terrible (Borderline suicide.) We fell for each other and decided to start a relationship which lasted about a year as well. I treated her with more respect than I've treated anyone in my life and never once requested anything she didn't want (She was very wary of anything relationshipwise due to her past) All of a sudden on day her mood changed violently and she began to completely backstab me and treat me like garbage. It got to the point where I gave up and ended the relationship.Jordan wrote:
Someday in October, I happen to chat with a girl here on osu! . Nothing unusual if not for the fact that I keep chatting with her everyday more, and I start liking her. As thé days pass by I start feeling moreand more affected to her. We decide tobecome a "couple" and I ask myself if it is theright thing to do because I'm skeptical about long distance relationships. Months pass and I love her more everyday. One day I start wondering if we could meet IRL. Turns out she can visit me in July. As I wait and wait, she decides to leave me in June after we had an argument about something stupid. It was ok. Well it wasn't ok at all but I thought "I'll get over it with time." Everything seems to be normal but some weeks after that I find out she left me for someone else. I fall in some sort of depression (??? I'm 16, hopefully i'll never know what réal dépression is.) The mixed feelings of manger, jealousy and deep sadness seem to be unbearable to the point I can't do anything productive IRL. I start harassing her in every way I can and I even decide to hurt myself once. The harassing ends on day. The process is slow, REALLY slow, but I'm starting to feel better. This sent on for about two weeks, until one day I findout this guy Will meet her in some days. There it all starts again. This time it's even worse than before.
She's sleeping next to him as I'm writing this. At the momoent, I don't have any hope of getting over it.
Tl; dr this is probably the worst night in my life. Sorry for any grammatical mistakes, this french tablet has an automatic corrector.
If you got any harsh comment about this, please keep it for yourself.
My words of wisdom to you my friend is similar to what dkun said. Find something that you can use to take your mind off of it. Instead of putting yourself down or being angry or anything turn those feelings into something that you can progress on. For me it's rock climbing, all that pain I go through on a daily basis while climbing pretty much drains the negative feelings out of me and keeps me going strong. Of course, I may not know you well but you are more than welcome to hit me up if you ever need someone to talk to!