00:06:013 (6013|1,6027|5,6090|2,6098|4) - Extend one of these notes to the end of the measure to signify the end of the vocal. Its plays pretty uncomfortably.
the instrumental for it keeps going. the other two lns stopped there because wanted to give more impact to that sound
made it only two so there's an expanding visual/effect to the patterns, kinda like a build up 
00:11:646 (11646|1,11646|2) - You could remove the LN's and use simple notes to represent the drum here. Example of you did it 00:02:313 (2313|1,2313|3,2313|6) -
sounds reasonable. however, if you look at the overall context, i've made it this way because 00:11:646 (11646|1,11646|2) - does not have any vocals immediately after it while 00:02:313 (2313|1,2313|3,2313|6) - does which helps to differentiate between instrumental and vocals visually.
00:19:701 (19701|2,19757|3) - These don't really have a effect on the breathing noise, I recommend to remove these two notes.
will look ugly without... will leave open to see if anyone else has something to say about it
00:31:896 (31896|4,31896|6,32062|3,32062|5,32229|6,32229|4) - These notes arent really timed to any noise but they have obvious timing points that are here. 00:31:979 and 00:32:146.
