There is really no such thing as tapping too hard, in general at least. Many top players tap extremely hard.
Read, don't react. More precisely, learn to read actively and not lazily/passively. So many beginners see notes appear and just click them as fast as possible without really absorbing their exact position and timing. This is the reason so many beginners end up mashing when they see patterns like slider streams and 1/3s. A lot of beginners can't even tell the difference between a 1/3 and a 1/4. A huge fundamental issue that results in these problems is that beginners will see a pattern and try to categorize the entire pattern into "stream", "triangle jump" or one of a various other number of patterns.
To read "actively", I would recommend trying to read each note as individually as possible (in most circumstances, sometimes it isn't possible). I personally do this by looking at each note to the best of my ability, but a lot of top players seem to use their peripheral vision a lot so I won't claim that it is necessary. By doing this you should hopefully circumvent the above issue.