tad01123 wrote:
Life can be exhausting sometimes but try to make the best out of every moment.
I mean, after just 2 to 3 years I'll graduate uni and will have to go find a full time job and try not to kill myself out of depression in the process.
But regardless, I'll pull through because life's a bitch and I won't lose to it.
...egh, yeah.
On my end, I've kinda just managed to get through shit because of my mindset, somehow. I'd been pretty badly depressed but managed to weasel my way out of the bulk of my shitty depression. I did the same with suicidal thoughts.
I still dunno how the hell that worked.
"As pointless as life may seem, death would be equally as pointless."
Just that one thought. And I just kinda... dropped it all. I no longer cared enough to die, and decided to weather the storm. Apathy settled in, and got me through some pretty tough shit.
Endurance has become my main focus for getting through life.
I have no real reason to die. I mean, "life's painful"? Of course it is, because you're at least living and able to feel pain. That's telling you two things. You're alive, and you're in need of something to help you pull through. In my case, apathy is the metaphorical bottle of painkillers. For someone else, it maybe a person, or group of people, sometimes friends, sometimes something else. Games, music, and art, can all help distract people from their own life and keep them busy. If nothing seems to work, you've got to do it yourself, and get yourself back up.
Well, for me, like many pills, that "painkiller", apathy, had its side effects.
So now I'm a little distant from others. I'm still trying to understand people. Trying to make sense of humanity, wondering what the hell would be the reason behind certain things.
But, all in all, I'm okay.
So I'm still glad for that.
g'morning, john.
...Time for school.
