Madoka2574

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WARNING: CASUAL STATEMENTS

（以下是我以前发的一些牢骚，我这人并不太愿意去删掉自己的黑历史，看看曾经的自己也能回忆起当时的心情，以及这一路是怎么走过来的。我的主页并没有太多的中文内容，这里算是我随性吐露的一些话，如果你能看到这里，或许是愿意多了解一下我的吧hhh）

是的作为一个老年玩家我已经累了，我并不懂得如何玩好游戏的同时合理安排自己的生活，在游戏中我也并不知道怎么平衡打图和做谱，我只知道我一旦想做谱就会满脑子旋律，根本睡不着，整天时间做谱，没时间练习打图。想做个谱rank吧，又太难了，跟人交流其实我觉得挺有趣，但是找人帮忙的时候是真的。。。好不容易找来一堆人摸图，完了找不到BN，设计思路或者抓音有时候又会比较固执，做谱水平也不咋地。我不是那种会搞关系的，你说你没时间，我也很体谅，BN是很忙，而且本身这个是义务劳动，当然，我认为既然当上了BN就应该履行自己该做的事情，所以只要是够勤快的我没意见，只不过，自己想哪怕是rank那么一张图都太难了，同样地，对我来说不管是给人摸图或者做hs或者找BN，都会轻易地占用我大把的时间，我不如去做些更有意义的事情。
我曾经给多个BN写PM，第一次写的时候长度甚至达到了800词（一篇正常的阅读理解也就400词，可以估计一下），我写的很详细了，包括为什么想rank，谱面到底是怎么设计的，等等，用我蹩脚的英文写这么多确实得花上我好几个小时的时间，但是有什么鸟用吗？没有。没时间或者不愿意看你的图的还是不会来。后来我写的字数越来越少了，其实也根本不会有人来。我也在线找过，要么婉拒了，要么呢甚至还有戳了完全不回复的。你们可以认为我努力错了方向，总之我确实在多个方面有争取。所以我真的佩服那些搞rank的，你们是真的有办事能力，我是不行了，这玩意太麻烦了，一旦我发现是我做出过努力还发现终点遥遥无期的时候，是真的心累。
至于打图什么的，我也得说我羡慕你们天赋玩家，我承认这个东西是需要练习，但我觉得就算我练习算不上刻苦，但也是中等水平了，我是真的在练习打图上专注投入过时间的，但是收效甚微。可能有人会说没有练不上去的，而是没好好练。但是当你发现有的人水平已经跟你差不多，事实上别人只是随便玩玩，都没怎么认真玩，或者说确实也经常玩，但是水平超出一大截，然而事实上是没玩的那么猛，而飞升如喝水的一抓一大把。我自认为我是花过了很多时间打图，不过确实这个东西，天赋比努力更重要。即使是拓展其他的模式，也远远比不过天赋玩家，一天可以爆我一个月的努力。
不过从付出的角度来讲，付出了不一定有回报，但不付出一定没有回报。对于那些不需要怎么练习就能飞升的人，我承认你们是天赋异禀，这个我甘拜下风；而对于那些确实很努力在练习，然后能力也能稳步提升的人，这才是我欣赏的类型，我衷心祝福你们；至于那些暂时看起来没什么进步的人，我想大多数人的提升速度不会比我的慢，看看我吧：我2016年11月入坑，去年5月过了4k的5段和7k的乱键0段，然后直到11月才过了4k的6段，而且只过了一次，至今只能稳5段而6段打不动，7k卡了8个月依然没有过1段，还是在我有两年节奏大师基础的情况下（虽然两年下来还是菜的不行）。
事实上我觉得我不能再让自己再在这个游戏上花这么多时间了，所以现在是下定决心咸鱼，调整一下心态吧，不要太在意跟别人比较，已经过了有跟人比拼这个能力的年纪了。
唯一让我担心的就是想做谱的时候，这个做谱非常耗时间，做吧，就得从早到晚连饭都不想吃地做，直到做完修改定稿。不做吧，脑子里旋律不停，晚上都会失眠。（这也是为什么我开始烦rank，因为脑子里反复想这个事情的时候真的伤脑筋，又停不下来）所以说还不如老实当个unrank谱师，想做的时候就做一下吧，克制一下自己别沉迷进去了。毕竟还是喜欢音乐，面对喜欢的曲子的时候对把它变成一张谱这件事情上没有免疫力。其实也只是想把自己对曲子的喜爱、对曲子的理解用谱面的方式传达给大家，想rank也只是为了让更多人看到，但既然不能，那随便做做也可以吧，感谢大家能够喜欢我的谱。
结论：游戏基本退坑，做谱看兴趣
当然闲暇时随便玩玩，或者大家喊mp什么的还是可以的(๑• . •๑)
其实本来是打算加个英文版本的，但是本来我就是说自己累了，所以这里懒得再去翻译了。
Sorry, I had planned to translate what I said above into English but I'm just too tired of it.
In a word, I've been tired of this game and ranking procedure, so I am going to be AFK and only make maps occasionally just for fun (maybe I will be also tired of it someday 'cause no one would play these maps and I can't get any of them ranked. But still, I am very grateful to those who liked my maps, which had been great encouragement to me).

Written on Feb 10, 2018
写这个东西又熬夜到3点多我容易嘛我o(´^｀)o

哦对了，最后还得感谢那些在提升打图能力上和做谱方面给予过我帮助的人，虽然在我这里都没有起到什么成效，但是确实打心底里感谢你们
提升打图能力方面，特别感谢一下katiexie带我打过几次4k练习图，以及erika77带打7k。另外印象中Awb有带我打过图，后来因为能力差距太大我都没怎么找他了，其他人就记不太清了
做图方面，特别感谢两位，一是猫先生ExNeko，最初鼓励我做rank的就是捏口了，期间也提供了不少帮助，也耐心解答了我很多问题；二是Celorig，感觉可能冒泡比较少，大家不太熟，在我试图rank竹取期间，经常关心进展情况，往往是看到我在线，就会问我图怎么样了，并且也不断鼓励我，虽然在具体怎么做谱上面没有什么帮助，但是确实让我很感动。当然还有Tofu1222，我一般就叫豆腐啦，不过认识的会叫思阳呢，这位就是人际圈很广了，志向远大XD，为多位做rank图的麻婆们都提供过帮助，免费mod什么的，当BN后我也咨询过不少问题（虽然要不来check有点小牢骚2333，不过是我现在不想麻烦他）
And here I also want to give thanks to dudehacker for several months of help on hitsounds. Although the hs may still not be able to meet the ranking criteria, I do appreciate that u are willing to argue with me over hs issues.
关于做图的一些感谢语，本来是打算在图rank之后在谱面简介里面写的，不过可能等不到那一天，先在这里写上吧～
虽然我只是众多玩家和麻婆中很平凡的一个，那些给予过我帮助的人可能并不会记得为我做过什么，但是对我来说，这是我在osu这个游戏中最记忆深刻的一部分，可能以后我不再玩这个游戏，但我还是希望能在这里留下点什么
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音游这条路也走的差不多了，6000pp已达成，虽然还有很多目标，不过都无所谓了，专心工作，人活着也不容易。还有太多的事情需要做，时间过得太快，转眼两年过去了，大学也读完了。悟已往之不谏，知来者之可追。识迷途其未远，觉今是而昨非。并不是说玩这游戏是个错误，事实上我对以往的经历都有太多的感慨了hhh，只是觉得自己以前玩的太多，青春都在这些东西上面，也没培养什么特长爱好，现在有种物是人非的感觉，该做点实事了吧。
另外我真的很喜欢音乐，主要是抒情空灵、震撼悠扬的音乐，钢琴为主旋律的，能做出这种音乐真的太棒了！一些好听的动漫和流行歌也一样喜欢。
沉迷于二次元的理想世界中。。。
在这里结识了很多的人让我感到很开心，以至于有的可能成为我的部分精神支柱。（现实空虚的人类，啧）
希望大家能开开心心吧，感觉能找到自己真正的兴趣甚至于理想，做自己想做的工作，在这个世上平稳的过下去，真的是一种奢侈。

2018/11/19 01:33

—— Something to say regarding mapping in mania ——
The community do have provided many good maps to ranked section, but the staffs still need to open their minds more in my opinion.

4K maps are generally lower in SR because it has fewer columns to map, well that's for sure, but please do not use SR to restrict the map while u judging a map, like "I don't accept any maps that is above 7* or even 6*. That's ridiculous. As we always say, we should map for song, not song for maps. So if the chart fits the song well, it should absolutely reasonable.
One thing I want to point out is, never to limit the map by its playability. For example, if u map for a song like 300bpm, and the song is still filled with 1/4s or any other rhythm in high speed, why can't u map 1/4 streams? I appreciated it if u could make the map follow the intensity of the song well. U can accept it in 150bpm, but cannot in 300bpm? Oh man u are mind-blocked by its playability, let alone there're still gods who can play it. U can say that a 1/2 in 300bpm is too hard for Easy, while 150bpm is fine. Anyways u should take care of beginners. But please don't say that split trills in 300bpm is unacceptable while 150bpm is OK. I know there are technical maps in this community, I love them too. What I wanna emphasize is to fairly treat different kinds of maps. High density is also a way to represent the rhythm. Because u guys shout that maps with too high SR will never be good, I hope it depends when u judge maps.
The chart is not necessary to be a LN map too. The ranked maps are generally diverse in rhythm, so the chart should be diverse to better represent the song. But there're also songs that kinda poor in diversity, like trance or some other songs well-known as for practice. But in my opinion, u are still permitted to push them for ranked status too, as long u can make a good chart and contain some certain ideas in ur map. For example, I won't veto something like AiAe, Blastix Riotz, and Memoria.
1. Blastix Riotz is a typical example for high SR 4K map. It has 1/4 jumptrills but that fits the song well, also refering to its SDVX chart. And FC has made the whole map generally hard enough which is worth a 7*.
2. This also applies for those 1/8 jumptrills in AiAe. Well nowadays we tend to suggest mapping 1/8 jumpstreams instead, but if the mapper insist the current jumptrills, I won't veto it. Anyways the overall difficulty is Luminal in Dan courses. When u argue that even the second fastest jumptrills is only 280bpm in iLLness LiLin, have u ever considered iLLness LiLin can be 96%-ed by a 10dan- player, but get 96% in AiAe needs to be Luminal? What I care about is whether the whole map is relatively balanced and fits the song. (Do not argue with me over quadstreams, I think they are reasonalble too.)
3. Memoria is a jack map and a good example for those for-practice-like maps. They should be accepted too, since I can also see the clear concept of the mapper, and consistency is also guaranteed.

As for higher key-modes, many BNs do not dare to check them, but, are those maps so different? I don't think so. They are no more special in my eyes. Just use ur modding skills and try to analyse the chart is enough from my point of view. Lack of playing skills doesn't mean u can't tell the problems of the map. BNs are those who got the basic concept of charting (I do respect that), with the basic theory u can check so many maps, but not only easy, low SR maps (and mostly 4K). For example, are 9K maps any different from 7K map? Since there's a PMS style, I understand if u prefer rice than noodles in 9K, also because it is hard to handle, but logically it is still feasible in mapping.

Well I am just speaking out for those that are generally got rejected in nowaday community, since I think the ranked pool can be much more colorful than what it is. I personally like to try different styles, so I'd love to see more fresh stuffs appear and get accepted. Mapping a certain kind of maps is kinda boring to me, but if u like u can contribute a lot of maps in ur style, like Kobii did for LN maps. It might look interesting when it firstly makes an appearance and become kinda boring (for me) after we have so many of this, but it is because so many mappers devote their love to their beloved kinds of maps that we are now having abundant maps to play now, so I will support them as well.

It won't change anything since I am not a member of BNG tho, but I want to state my opinions here since it is what I have been looking for and trying to let myself be like.

In May 2020 I guess