OT!News
Latest News From OT
June 6th - June 12th
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Hello, and welcome to the tenth edition of OT News!
Our climatologist is away once again this week to take care of some classified matter concerning OT,
so we have ColdTooth filling in for today.
Hello my name is ColdTooth, the climatologist in training. We are expecting a massive hurricane striking OT.
The hurricane is expected to become a category 4 overnight, and possibly turn into a category 5 the next day;
it is strongly recommended to get to safer ground and free from the storm.
~ColdTooth, OT climatologist in training
The New OT?
Recently, a civil war broke out in OT; there was a clash between ideas of OT’s future with denizens raiding each other’s homes and holding their children as hostages against each other. Nuclear warheads were launched and navis from oppositions were ready to fire their torpedoes when giant armies collided at the centre of the land, which ravaged the peace that was once held firm. This conflict, however, enraged Ephemeral, who descended upon Earth and brought the spacetime to a halt. It was at this moment, the new testament was made, Ephemeral carved 8 commandments into the heart of the universe, with any rebels being exiled to the freezing dark wilderness with a slim chance of return. The rules detail how OT Denizens should behave, what is and is not allowed as a topic, and the divine punishment that come as a result of disobeying these rules. The thread ended up turning into a post-war battle, some people agreeing with the new commandments, some against them.
Right when the new testament began and the commandments were laid down, three denizens met their fate of being exiled. These three exiled were known to create threads that brought cries of dissatisfaction among the other denizens many times in the past. While there were objections to this decision and other discussions were thriving, another denizen stepped into the realm of shitthreads and was brutally shot down after three strikes that marked his demise, increasing the exile count to four.
These commandments are very important for the survival at OT, so we strongly advise you to read them for yourselves. However, for you busy folks, here is a quick summary:
- You can only create one thread every 24 hours. Posts in pre-existing threads, however, are unaffected by this rule.
- Forum games and questions must go in FG and Surveys, respectively. No exceptions.
- Serious discussions are banned. Try to post funny content, if possible.
- Birthday threads will be shot down if they don’t include at least three dancing anime girls in the OP.
Denizens that do not follow the above rules risk being exiled, which is a ban on thread creation.
2017-06-06: Creating a thread meant to contain all the salt flying around, Railey2 created a thread addressing an issue that has been plaguing OT for some time. This thread is known to be the big bang of modern OT era that sparked all debates and has been coined as the “oldfag vs newfag battle of the OT Civil War”. As intended by Railey2, the thread soon gained great attention from many denizens and created debates with different viewpoints. This debate came to an end when Lord Farquaad released the set of commandments in an attempt to settle the situation.
2017-06-08: During the debate arisen by the thread above, [Taiga] felt the need to set out a thread in order to calm the rough waters. After taking some time to organize his own thoughts, the thread was crafted and presented carefully to the denizens to suggest an agreement point. This further evoked discussions on what kinds of threads should be tolerated and how threads should be made, along with other walls of text explaining the citizens’ opinions and their takes on the issue.
2017-06-08: Succumbing to the stresses and traumas expected from a Civil War, johnmedina999 came out with an apology letter to both sides of the conflict. The apology letter included a few controversial remarks and some claims, which sparked some discussion and further remarks on this issue. However, the letter was surely meant with the best intentions and was not meant to cause any more fighting and resolve his viewpoint.
2017-06-11 With the 8 commandments in place, abraker took notice of the changing landscape and went out to voice his thoughts about the aftermath. He worries that the commandments will cause a decline in OT until it barely has any life left and that the correct way should be to let shitposts be. At first, the denizens seemed to accept the fate; but then they changed focus to argue about how demand for quality should be, mixing in concepts which proved to be too advanced for themselves.
News
2017-06-06: ColdTooth wrote a thank you letter to the denizens of OT. With his constant struggling in another realm, ColdTooth was left in dire distress. However, the love that exists between the denizens of OT and the cancer that was formed through osu! allowed him to push on and feel better. Now fulfilled by the autism he has gained from the fellow denizens, he asks everyone to lend him a helping hand, and to aid him in his path to glory, shining out his brony nature.
Coldtooth coming out and thanking OT.
2017-06-08: Following the scandal previously mentioned, Kisses has written a satire replica of the news. As numerous juicy events happened around OT, this copy of the news covered other events that were not exactly covered under a single thread. Regarding the variety of reactions to this news, Kisses has openly stated that he would not make a followup to this edition as he found it “pretty embarrassing tbh” and rather bizarre to continue with another edition. It is highly recommended to give the news a read!
OT!News, Kisses edition.
2017-06-08: A secondary weekly news #10 has been published by Meah. A news report company established by Meah also published its first weekly news. This news report, parodying OT!News, covers a wide array of topics. These topics range from Meah’s threads to Meah’s fanfiction writing. The News, however, was written right before the author was thrown into the pit of the abyss, so all letters to the editor must be redirected there. It is highly recommended to also give this news a read!
OT!News, Meah edition.
2017-06-08: Meah has created a counterfeit social media network service based on a service used by many: Twitter. As an accustomed version for OT, this thread has given an opportunity for denizens to share their status just like the original was designed to do. Upon creation, many denizens have poured their heart out as if it was the real Twitter, with Meah furiously writing cliff-hanging fanfictions and Stefan dumping his s-ul storage.
OT!witter, for all your status update needs.
2017-06-10: Mara has brought to OT a tradition from the outside world, E3, that he wanted to share with the his fellow friends of OT. E3, short for Electronic Entertainment Expo, a yearly event in which big gaming companies participate to spice up their marketing game. As many presentations are not always of the highest quality, there is a tradition that lurks around E3; that is, filling up the E3 report card and predicting the content the companies will bring along. During the presentations, participants see whether their predictions were correct, and enjoy the little mistakes and cringe moments the show offers. Later on, they give a grade based on what they have watched, compiling them into one big report card.
In addition, a bingo was carried out to entertain those watching the show, adding onto the enjoyment of this thread. The bingo lists the 22 denizens participating in the viewing of E3 and it can be seen that everyone is enjoying their time watching the show, no matter if they know a lot about these games, they don’t, they’re excited, or they’re ready to face the disappointment some shows will bring.
Which company will bring the biggest disappointment?
2017-06-12: In an attempt to reduce locks and exiles, DJ Enetro has created a guide for survival during this time at OT. Seeing his beloved friends and family being exiled left and right, DJ Enetro decided to create a guide in order to reduce the probability of survivors being banished. The first step to the guide is to read every post and sort them into one of three categories: Factual, Interpretive, and Evaluative. Although there are no descriptions given for each of the three categories, it is assumed that common sense applies. The guide continues by stating that recognizing quality is a step to improve quality, and that non-qualitative posts should be left to sink into oblivion. The guide ends with a secret message to different denizen groups.
How to avoid the lockstorms and exilestorms currently active at OT, a comprehensive guide.
2017-06-10: An award ceremony was organized but canceled due to timetable problems. Meah, an entrepreneur, constituted OT!Awards, which was made to give an award for the elitist of each category from Worst of the Worst to Best OT User. Nominations were to be given and the highest nominated individual was to gain the award. However, the party was crashed and cancelled as the entrepreneur realized he had been found for his crimes and was being hunted by the special ops. Backed into a corner, Meah dropped the event in an attempt to escape but was unable to evade his condemnation.
Show was cancelled due to…technical difficulties.
2017-06-08: A controversial topic has been presented by Citremi (“Pizza v. Burgers”) and caused a massive debate. As all fast food lovers might know, this is a long dispute that began many decades ago and still continues today; the dispute of which is the better, Pizza or Burger. In this thread, Citremi gave his points as to why he thinks burgers are better. From the symbol of Americanism to health benefits and complementary goods, he demonstrated great understanding of both foods and provided a strong argument showing the superiority of burgers. While the poll had an intense tug of war for the superiority of both foods, it later became clear that hamburgers were indeed the more preferred food among the two. The thread was also plagued by denizens who deemed that they themselves were the best option among the two foods presented.
Poll showing the majority favoring burgers over pizza.
2017-06-09: Serraionga the Wise invited the denizens to a small storytelling time about his past experience with another town he resided in before he moving to OT. Seeing the distress within the town of OT, Serraionga the Wise was forced out of his retirement to give his great story once again. This story dates all the way back to 2009, when Serraionga was yet to find out about our own town. Inhabiting a similar forum, he explains a conflict between two parties of “a Spanish subforum where any kind of trashposting was allowed”. He continued to recite down the tragic tale of how the unfavorable events lead to shitposters being purged from the forum which eventually lead to the destruction of the forum itself. The story was recorded by himself and is currently displayed in a publicly-accessible diary for everyone to view. Serraionga ended his storytime with showing a little box that he described as, “Unless you get triggered easily, do not open the [spoiler] box.” It is still a mystery what could be inside the box.
It’s Serraionga’s Story Time.
When Will it End?
A Comprehensive List of OTrends
Yet another round of birthday threads have made their debut on OT.
Remember to greet these threads with more dancing anime gifs!
Happy Birthday to the month of June
Happy Birthday Meow Mix
Fanclubs have again appeared at OT, continuing the long tradition the forum has kept for years since it was made.
The Dawnsday fanclub has been revived, and Cupcake Fanclub (KupcaH) made its first appearance
which eventually made Stefan to create yet another ruleset titled, Fan Club Ruleset - WIP.
OT Denizens
Keep the Cancer Flowing
New Denizens
Promoting his own skin, Xionix_YT has found OT to be the perfect place to visit.
His thread, My skin, was met with a variety of responses of those reluctant to click on the link.
A researcher at work, Citremi has found the grounds to submit his findings. First he created the debate regarding food as mentioned,
and soon he presented his research paper on the phenomena he has found to be the Screaming Earth™ theory.
Welcome Back!
ahsoka08 has come back to OT after months of MIA status. He asserts his comeback in his thread titled
I'M BACK BITCHES which contains yet another gif of dancing anime characters.
Smokk has made a short visit to confess his love towards Stefan, just to quickly disappear back into thin air.
OT!News will always try to provide quality content.
If you find any errors or have a suggestion, please leave a post below or
feel free to PM / highlight us either through the osu! site or our Discord.
See you next week!
Credits:
We would like to take this opportunity to thank kai99 and Blitzfrog for giving us so much cancer that we needed to bleach our eyes, abraker for tidying the cancer, johnmedina999 for grammar nazi-ing, and a collaborative effort to make the cancer look nice. We also would like to give special thanks to everyone in the official Discord server for giving us the support needed not to shoot ourselves. Until next time!
Thank you, good night, and remember to...
We would like to take this opportunity to thank kai99 and Blitzfrog for giving us so much cancer that we needed to bleach our eyes, abraker for tidying the cancer, johnmedina999 for grammar nazi-ing, and a collaborative effort to make the cancer look nice. We also would like to give special thanks to everyone in the official Discord server for giving us the support needed not to shoot ourselves. Until next time!
Thank you, good night, and remember to...
