What has anime taught me?

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Topic Starter
Haneii
*I didn't write this. Was one of my facebook notes and I thought it would be nice if I could post it here :P


1. Any color ever imagined is a natural hair color.

2. No matter where you are hit or how minor the injury you will bleed out of your mouth.

3. All living things (and some non-living things) contain 50 gallons of blood and every single bit will pour out or shoot out geyser style if you get injured.

4. Nobody's hair is subject to the laws of gravity.

5. The old guy is the most perverted person ever. Or the most powerful. Or both.

6. Not showing your whole face doubles or triples your power.

7. Other worlds are found in incredibly random places.

8. He's your father.

9. Your eyes must be 3x the size of your nose.

10. You don't necessarily need a nose.

11. Being friends with the main character will automatically cause freaky stuff to happen to you.

12. Your hair will blow in the wind during a dramatic moment even in pouring rain or when there is no other breeze for 50 miles.

13. You're never too young to fight monsters.

14. If you're a girl, the fewer clothes you wear the better you are at fighting.

15. Or you will be completely annoying and of no use at all, and will probably either get in the way or cry hysterically. Or do both at the same time.

16. No matter how small you are, you can totally lift that weapon.

17. If you're cute enough, bubbles will spontaneously erupt behind you at random moments.

18. If it's undeniably impossible in real life, don't worry, you can totally pull it off.

19. Sleeping heals everything...EVERYTHING. So do bandages around your stomach.

20. Pupils? Psh, who needs em. Most likely if you don't have pupils, you have better power than those who do.

21. The cuter the animal is the more gruesome it will be when it kills you.

22. Travel of any form will either take 3 seconds, or 30 episodes.

23. Staying in one place for more than one season is referred to as 'being on Namek'.

24. One punch will fling you through a wall. And you will stand up, wipe off the dust, and be fine.

25. No matter how many explosions you survive, the love interest can kill you with one shot.

26. It will take either 297 episodes for the love interest to kiss you or it will never happen.

27. No matter how ugly you are, wings make you amazingly hot.

28. You're lips don't really have to match what you're saying.

29. You will sound absolutely horrible in English.

30. If it has more than two tails, it'll totally kick your ass.

31. Screaming for an obnoxiously long period of time or drawing out the name of your attack for a full minute will make it awesome, no matter what.

32. The girl in the schoolgirl uniform is way more powerful than you.

33. The longer the guy's hair, or the worse his attitude the sexier everyone thinks he is.

34. Every fight will contain a clip of a particularly good hit and will show it at least three times in 12 different angles and at least one close up.

35. You will be asked to do totally random and pointless things for filler while the writers try to catch up.

36. If your boobs wouldn't break your spine in real life then you probably won't last for more than a few episodes.

37. Your outfit will defy gravity.

38. If you stand on or near a cliff, you will have a painful flashback.

39. It’s not face paint, it's a birthmark. Or sleep deprivation.

40. The opening sequence has absolutely nothing to do with the main story, but looks really good anyway.

41. Nobody has body hair unless it's there for a joke.

42. There will be long boring speeches explaining why the good guy is good and why the bad guy is bad and how the bad guy is, better than, or just like the good guy because of these reasons.

43. The bad guy will try to bring the good guy over to his side.

44. The title doesn't have to have anything to do with the story, or even make sense.

45. Someone has to have amnesia, or at least has forgotten some important event.

46. The quiet girl is in love with you, and the girl you love either doesn't know, doesn't care, or loves your bitter rival.

47. Nobody ever has to use the bathroom, unless it's for a joke.

48. Somebody will have some sort of transformation.

49. The smallest person will eat the most food.

50. There will always be a giant version of some animal. And you will either have to ride it, kill it, or protect it.

51. There will be at least one overly muscular stupid guy.

52. If you can't tell if it's a boy or a girl, even after you hear them talk, it's probably a boy.

53. Cross-dressing will be required to get away from a bad guy, and the task will probably fall to either the main character or the biggest ugliest guy on the team.

54. Shadows do not have to make sense.

55. If you're eye is covered by hair, it will take something like a nuclear explosion to move it...or a plot device.

56. Dramatic lighting and single rays of light can turn any moment into a profound and meaningful moment.

57. Breathing under water? Totally possible.

58. If a hat is a regular part of your normal outfit you could be hanging upside down underwater on the moon and it will stay on.

59. Space is totally habitable.

60. Lasers out of any body part are always helpful.

61. Nothing in the entire series has to make any sense.

62. Anything can be a pet, if you can catch it.

63. Anything, no matter how big, can be shoved into a little ball and released into a fight at random.

64. You can be 10 years old for 12 years.

65. Your super secret special weapon won't work the way you intended.

66. The people who live in the 90 degree weather will wear black.

67. There will be an episode where the main character takes his shirt off. It's just for the fan girls. Enjoy.

68. Hot springs can be found anywhere.

69. Everything a character says can be turned into innuendo.

70. When someone get hurt his/her cuteness rises by 30%

71. Getting stabbed with a sword will not kill you, it'll just give you special powers.

72. Note books fall out of the sky. Then they give you godly powers.

73. War sucks.

74. Smart people wear glasses.

75. Music foreshadows plot.

76. The less you care about sex, the more opportunities you’ll get.

77. (Inversely, the harder you try, the less you’ll get.)

78. When you die, make a long speech, and don’t finish the last sentence.

79. There’s always room for flashbacks!

80. The good guy always has the BLUE glow.

81. Teachers have excellent aim with small objects.

82. Honour is sexy; villainy is irresistible.

83. Women are attracted to losers; men are attracted to ANYTHING.

84. The coolest weapon is still the sword.

85. The hero is never really mad until they hurt his girlfriend

86. Love knows no race, species, or logic.

87. Never trust a huge corporation.

88. Never fall for the girl who names her mech with a French name.

89. Never fall in love with a psychic.

90. You can never have too much hair.

91. Sweating is a sure sign of stress.

92. Daydreaming leads to accidents.

93. The cute, fuzzy creature isn’t what it seems.

94. Cherry blossoms mean nostalgia.

95. Always take gravity into account.

96. Settings and faces are self-generating.

97. Losing your temper can be therapeutic.

98. You can never have too many subplots.

99. You always remember the sad endings.

100. Double suicide is romantic.

101. Outrageous vehicles only make the hero cooler.

102. No matter how much blood is lost, no one can die by a nosebleed.

103. (The same theory above applies to vomiting.)

104. The girl with the curly hair is always the seductress.

105. If a sister falls in love with her brother, somewhere down the line you will discover that they’re not blood related.

106. The guy in the baseball cap is always more powerful than he seems.

107. All young children can pilot mecha, you just need to give them a few days.

108. It is possible to incorporate martial arts into any aspect of life.

109. All high school kids in Japan have parents that are away on extended business trips.

110. You can do anything to the human body as long as you hit the right pressure point.

111. Consuming enormous amounts of alcohol daily will never have ill effects.

112. All major villains either want to take over the world or blow it up.

113. When someone paints up their face, they mean business.

114. Everyone in Japan has excellent singing voices.

115. The martial arts expert is always defenseless against a slap from the girl who loves him.

116. The longer it takes to say what your punch is called, the more effective it is.

117. No matter how big the mech/labour/mobile suit is, if it runs around the corner, the guy chasing it loses the trail.

118. The fate of the planet rests in the hands of the seemingly normal high school student.

119. The heroine must shred her clothes while transforming into something to fight the bad guys.

120. True evil can never be destroyed, only banished to some nether realm where it awakes after a few hundred years.

121. Even the bravest souls can be made weak and helpless by the sight of a cute little puppy or kitten

122. All persons under the age of 50 can do a ten foot vertical jump from a standing position.

123. ESP causes more trouble than it solves.

124. The police are never anywhere there is a large amount of property damage.

125. All people with esper powers give off multicoloured auras.

126. Just about any outer space villain has his sights set on destroying the Earth.

127. (in conjunction with #126) No other planet in the universe will be able to stop said villain except the Earth.

128. Any character can make a leap of 300 ft or more if given a good running start.

129. A samurai’s sword can cut through anything.

130. All characters over the age of 60 shrink in height in direct proportion to their age.

131. When uncovering a fabulous treasure, the thing will be large enough to completely destroy any surrounding structures.

132. Anime villains have the best deaths.

133. Any love interest will always be possessed by a demon.

134. The hero always looses the first fight with a new enemy.

135. The guys with two earrings are from the Negaverse.

136. Don’t trust the guys with two earrings.

137. Any truly evil person who changes sides for the woman he loves will die in that episode.

138. The song “Cry Me a River” takes on a whole new meaning.


Go ahead and add to the list! what has anime taught YOU?

ps: I don't expect you to read the whole list. It's just an example :P.
OzzyOzrock
139. The cuter it is, the more distubring it'll turn out to be.
Rantai
140. Contacts only have to be 1/5th the size of the eye to be adequate.

141. The person you save will fall in love with you.
Faust
142. People die when they are killed

Haw haw.
Vish024
143. That manga is always better.

Whoops! That might cause a bit of debate and dispute here. hehehe
Weez
144. The main character must always sit next to the window in class.
Firo Prochainezo

Faust wrote:

142. People die when they are killed

Haw haw.
Har har.
TKiller
Lelouch dies.
Fabi
Spike dies in the end.
Lilac
Please tell me why I read all of that?

Anyway. Anime has taught me that someone's worse off, cause they have superpowers.
TheFlook
145. Your High School relationship will last forever.
those
In anime, siblings aren't related.

Edit: referring to Akane-Iro Ni Somaru Saka
Pizzicato

Faust wrote:

142. People die when they are killed

Haw haw.
I lol'd
Another good example is this
Firo Prochainezo
# - The hot girl is in love with you. Always.
Faust
# - Sometimes when enemies see your power level, it makes them want to crush their scouters whilst commenting on large numbers.
Zekira
9. Your eyes must be 3x the size of your nose.

10. You don't necessarily need a nose.
If you put these together in one, that means you don't necessarily need eyes too.
TheFlook

Faust wrote:

# - Sometimes when enemies see your power level, it makes them want to crush their scouters whilst commenting on large numbers.
It's over 9000!
Topic Starter
Haneii
#- Breakdancing is a legitimate fighting style

#- Never give out your full name
Lilac

Haneii wrote:

#- Never give out your full name
As much as I hate the anime, I see what you did there.
Gabi
# - The male protagonist is always a useless pathetic person untill he, after several times, realises he is a useless pathetic person and then he becomes uber strong and kills/saves everyone.
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