I think you're pretty right about that. It is a difference between us and may very well have led me down a different path. But yes, my ego is an issue. It's not something that's in a place I want it to be. I would fix it but there are some inherent issues with that:
1.) My ego is tied to my sense of competitiveness very closely. Without my ego, I probably wouldnt be competitive. Without my competitiveness, I could get rid of my ego issues, but then I would sacrifice my best trait. Is it then really something I want to get rid of? I dont think so. I'm okay with just consciously working against it. I think I'm alright this way, so I'd rather keep the thing that really helps me want to stay alive and actually be productive and drive my passions.
2.) Its intoxicating. This is a serious issue because my ego isnt totally fabricated. I'm very self aware and that means I'm aware enough to realize that I do have some good reasons for being egotistical. I'm very intelligent, and I know it. I'm a very fast learner, and I know it. There isn't a thing in my life I've ever focused on and not ended up being in some way, shape, or form successful because of it. That makes it hard to rationalize not being egotistical and when you add on top of that the fact that it's one of those things that's addictive, it's not easy to get rid of.
So yeah. That's probably the thing I like about myself least and it's kind of scary to post that on an online forum. Which is highly ironic because youd expect someone egotistical to not be afraid of people judging them, eh?
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1.) My ego is tied to my sense of competitiveness very closely. Without my ego, I probably wouldnt be competitive. Without my competitiveness, I could get rid of my ego issues, but then I would sacrifice my best trait. Is it then really something I want to get rid of? I dont think so. I'm okay with just consciously working against it. I think I'm alright this way, so I'd rather keep the thing that really helps me want to stay alive and actually be productive and drive my passions.
2.) Its intoxicating. This is a serious issue because my ego isnt totally fabricated. I'm very self aware and that means I'm aware enough to realize that I do have some good reasons for being egotistical. I'm very intelligent, and I know it. I'm a very fast learner, and I know it. There isn't a thing in my life I've ever focused on and not ended up being in some way, shape, or form successful because of it. That makes it hard to rationalize not being egotistical and when you add on top of that the fact that it's one of those things that's addictive, it's not easy to get rid of.
So yeah. That's probably the thing I like about myself least and it's kind of scary to post that on an online forum. Which is highly ironic because youd expect someone egotistical to not be afraid of people judging them, eh?
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