hello~
[collab]
00:00:576 ~ 00:06:782 - umm i'm not sure what are you following here but it's not sounds nice to me and feels not connected with next section. can be a spinner,it is more simple but better imo
00:19:403 () - change to k because the pitch is higher than 00:16:093 -
00:26:024 () - ^
00:23:748 () - change to d, similar with 00:17:127 -
00:27:472 () - k will flow better imo
00:34:093 () - ^
00:30:162 () - swap with 00:31:196 () - because the first one sounds lower
00:36:782 () - swap with 00:37:817 () - ^
00:52:507 () - change to k, higher pitch than 00:49:196 -
00:59:127 () - ^
00:56:231 - try ddkdd, i think it fits better. (change 00:56:644 () - to d)
00:53:127 - and try kdddk here (change 00:53:231 () - to d)
01:03:265 () - swap with 01:04:300 () -
01:03:265 () - and change this to d as the pitch seems dropping
the first chorus is really nice. lundle's part here it is
01:29:748 () - swap with 01:29:955 () - because overall no duplet with same colour in the chorus so it's a bit weird
01:16:507 () - can change to d for better flow
01:23:334 () - how about change to d here?
01:36:576 () - ^
01:24:472 () - add d here, for consistency with 01:37:713 -
01:52:920 - add d here, so it's like at 01:56:231 - and 01:59:541 -
01:52:507 (565,566) - and swap these
02:03:369 ~ 02:04:920 - maybe like this :
blackhair part now
02:32:851 (56,57) - swap these, because at 02:22:920 (9,10) - you make it d d, then 02:26:231 (25,26) - this is k k , and 02:29:541 (40,41) - this is k d, so i was expected the next is d k.
i feels the second chorus a bit less energetic. maybe can add a note in a gap like at 02:50:644 - and some others. but it's ok if you want to keep.
02:59:748 (188) - how about make this k, and 03:00:576 (192) - this is d, because it's like an elongation of vocal pitch and it's better make it same color as previous note
03:12:989 (263) - and 03:13:817 (267) - same as above
03:05:334 (219,220,221) - this is the only kdk pattern in the chorus and i find it weird. can delete the first hit to make it just a dk like at 02:52:093 - or make them ddk
oh, lundle again.
03:45:058 (113,114) - hmm.. swap?
03:52:610 (164,165,166,167,168,169) - how about reverse the color of these notes. it's more fits i think
03:55:817 - delete, you don't put note at 03:59:127 - and 04:02:438 - as well
04:02:231 () - change to k for consistency with 03:55:610 - or maybe it's on purpose?
hello toara,
04:23:334 (9) - i think the vocal voice is at 04:22:920 - move this?
04:44:024 (59,60) - you can swap these to also match the vocal pitch. can ignore if you just want to follow drum
04:48:369 (81) - change this to k will give better impact at the next finisher, like at 05:01:610 -
04:48:162 (79) - and can change this to d for better pattern (and i hear some kind of sound similar as 04:47:748 - )
05:01:403 () - change to d too
04:51:886 (105) - change to k will flows better
04:50:851 (97) - change to d ^
04:51:576 (103) - umm..delete maybe? because the vocal voice is only until 04:51:472 -
05:04:817 () - ^
05:06:265 () - ^
hi black hair man. i find nothing in last part. but maybe you can map the spinner at 05:49:403 (1) - i'm not feeling comfortable.
that's all. see ya~
