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Ayana Taketatsu - Hey! Calorie Queen

posted
Total Posts
7
Shiguma
476 posts
Joined May 2014
Topic Starter
Shiguma
This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on Tuesday, February 27, 2018 at 12:17:54 AM

Artist: Ayana Taketatsu
Title: Hey! Calorie Queen
Source: だがしかし
Tags: Cris- wolf3211 Dagashi Kashi ed ending tv edit size
BPM: 156
Filesize: 25269kb
Play Time: 01:28
Difficulties Available:
  1. Cris' Hard (3.07 stars, 262 notes)
  2. Insane (4.33 stars, 366 notes)
  3. Samoas (4.82 stars, 463 notes)
  4. Wolf's Normal (1.94 stars, 156 notes)
Download: Ayana Taketatsu - Hey! Calorie Queen
Download: Ayana Taketatsu - Hey! Calorie Queen (no video)
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
Normal made by wolf3211
Hard made by Cris-
Last edited by Shiguma , edited 78 times in total.
Cris-
Beatmap Nominator
552 posts
Joined March 2015
Cris-
Log
2017-09-24 14:33 Cris_1: ACTION is editing [https://osu.ppy.sh/b/1419284 Taketatsu Ayana - Hey! Calorie Queen [Samoas]]
2017-09-24 14:33 Shiguma: okay
2017-09-24 14:34 Cris_1: 00:03:535 (1,2,3) - this flow can be better, keep the direction of the cursor more natural
2017-09-24 14:35 Cris_1: 00:05:073 (1) - separe this from the previous slider. x:512 y:224 is a good option imo
2017-09-24 14:35 Cris_1: 00:05:746 (1) - this isn't much predominant, delete
2017-09-24 14:36 Cris_1: 00:06:996 (2,3,4,5,6) - this is a bit confuse, maybe you can separe it all of this patterns
2017-09-24 14:37 Cris_1: 00:15:458 (7,8) - slider here?
2017-09-24 14:37 Cris_1: 00:16:227 (3) - put a 1/4 slider here. 00:16:420 - too here
2017-09-24 14:38 Shiguma: 00:03:535 (1,2,3) - i think flow there is fine
2017-09-24 14:38 Shiguma: 00:05:073 (1) - moved this
2017-09-24 14:38 Shiguma: 00:05:843 (1) - deleted
2017-09-24 14:38 Cris_1: 00:18:439 (4) - maybe you can put this in the head of 00:17:766 (2) -
2017-09-24 14:39 Cris_1: 00:18:054 - 5% volume here
2017-09-24 14:39 Shiguma: 00:06:996 - this is actually a good concept imo
2017-09-24 14:39 Shiguma: 00:15:458 (7,8) - i could, but dont see reason to
2017-09-24 14:40 Cris_1: 00:21:804 (4) - x:288 y:168?
2017-09-24 14:40 Cris_1: 00:21:996 (5) - x:368 y:320 also NC
2017-09-24 14:41 Shiguma: 00:16:227 (3) - made into 1/4th slider 00:16:420 (4) - is a circle now
2017-09-24 14:41 Cris_1: 00:50:458 (1,2) - ctrl+g
2017-09-24 14:42 Cris_1: 00:51:227 (1,2) - huh blanket?
2017-09-24 14:42 Shiguma: 00:18:439 (4) - this is okay imo
2017-09-24 14:42 Shiguma: 00:18:054 - fixed
2017-09-24 14:43 Cris_1: 00:54:593 (2) - excesive slider vel. reduce all of this please. imo you can put this inhiriteds at 1.20x
2017-09-24 14:43 Shiguma: 00:21:804 (4) - nah its fine
2017-09-24 14:43 Cris_1: 01:00:746 (5) - imo in the head of 6 looks better
2017-09-24 14:44 Shiguma: 00:21:996 (5) - if you look at my nc patterning its on new vocals
2017-09-24 14:44 Cris_1: 01:21:996 (5) - offscreen
2017-09-24 14:44 Cris_1: 01:28:150 - 5% volume
2017-09-24 14:46 Cris_1: In my opinion you need to use more space in this diff, specially in the kiai. some patterns looks very closed
2017-09-24 14:47 Shiguma: 00:50:458 (1,2) - that would ruin emphasis lol
2017-09-24 14:47 Cris_1: ^ but is better for circular flow
2017-09-24 14:47 Shiguma: 00:51:227 (1,2) - i like this but i moved 00:51:804 (3) - to be more consistent with the style
2017-09-24 14:47 Shiguma: 00:54:593 (2) - ill think about this
2017-09-24 14:52 Shiguma: https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9168245
2017-09-24 14:52 Shiguma: made it this instead
2017-09-24 14:52 Shiguma: ill also see about spacing out more in the kiai
2017-09-24 14:58 Cris_1: hmm
2017-09-24 14:58 Cris_1: looks better now
2017-09-24 14:59 Cris_1: the tail for the right is a bit ugly
2017-09-24 15:00 Shiguma: xd its fine i think
2017-09-24 15:00 Cris_1: okay okay xD

About my gd i will try to finish it as soon as possible c:
Last edited by Cris- , edited 1 time in total.
Mun
469 posts
Joined July 2015
Mun
change top diff name to diabeetus
00:00:458 (3) - slider gave me crippling depression, please just use a red node and make a more balanced hook-curve
00:01:996 (4) - This is both a strong kick and a new note in the brass section. It's extremely strong, but it's mapped in an extremely boring, non-differentiated way. Just Logic Agenting a slider isn't enough to differentiate such a strong sound. see 00:02:766 (6) - 00:03:535 (1) - 00:04:112 (2) - 00:04:689 (4) -
00:08:150 - Throughout this section, you seem to disregard downbeats completely. The section isn't split up into patterns, it's just a bunch of jumps with a few circles seemingly arbitrarily replaced with kicksliders. It's just jump-spam, and everything from spacing to visual distance to rhythm needs work.
00:16:996 (8) - held trumpet, gets shortened to half a beat, 00:17:381 (1) - staccato trumpet, gets lengthened to half a beat.
00:18:920 (7,1,2) - This disproportionately emphasizes both 00:19:112 (1) - with abnormal spacing for a relatively normal beat and 00:19:304 (2) - with an abnormal angle and spacing change causing extremely uncomfortable movement. Both of these turn out much stronger than the downbeat itself. Also, NC on the downbeat, not the vocals. See: 00:21:996 (5,1,2) - 00:34:304 (7,1,2) -
00:20:458 (1) - The vocals here are held, why shorten to 1/2 slider? See: 00:23:535 (1) - 00:35:843 (1) - 00:48:920 (4) -
00:43:535 - For one, this is a major downbeat that isn't NC'd. For two, this section is a massive intensity jump from before, but the map itself does not make that obvious. The rhythm remains just as simple with no density increase, and this is fine, but movement and spacing also goes almost entirely unchanged.
00:50:073 (3) - You can get away with emphasizing these more by lengthening them to 3/4 with the trumpet.
I'll leave this diff at that, since I'm basically telling you to remap half of it to fix its consistency, rhythm, and sectioning issues.
Your NCs are almost all offbeat, why?

insane
00:00:458 (3) - why do you have an aversion to good sliders
00:02:766 (3) - If you're going to emphasize 00:01:996 (1) - the exact same sound with highly uncomfortable movement, do the same here.
00:16:131 (2,3,4,5) - You seem to be really selectively implementing these streams, and I don't get why. This one (and 00:12:958 (2,3,4,5,6) - ), for example, seems to be mapped to nothing at all. Any 1/4 behind it is nearly inaudible. However, much louder 1/4 drum patterns like those around 00:14:304 - go completely ignored. This is pretty grossly unrepresentative of the song.
00:14:304 (1) - 00:15:266 (4) - This dip in pitch is pretty common in this intense intro to the song, and yet it goes completely unappreciated. The map seems to be ignoring them instead of using them to its advantage.
00:16:996 (7) - held sound into 00:17:381 (1) - staccato, but both are the same length of slider
00:17:381 (1,3) - If you're gonna use a squiggly slider, try to fit the sliders around it into that squiggly slider so it doesn't look so comically out of place.
00:18:920 (1,2,3) - 00:21:996 (1,2,3) - 00:25:073 (1,2,3) - 00:26:612 (1,2,3) - All of these patterns have one thing in common: really silly emphasis. Vocals go entirely ignored, but it's not entirely obvious until the last example, where an extremely strong note is totally ignored for a quiet, repetitive background instrumental.
00:36:804 (3,4,5,1) - If you're gonna map it this way, map the same vocal pattern 00:38:343 (6,7,8,1) - the same way, too.
00:42:573 (2) - The sliderend feels like it falls on a pretty important note here.
00:57:381 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9) - Make a decision: are you using wide angle emphasis or are you not using wide angle emphasis? Because this uses wide angles to make several notes hard to hit, but this same form of movement exists almost nowhere else in the kiai.
01:08:823 (4) - If you are going to ignore the kick, ignore it - don't shorten a slider and make it unrepresentative of the trumpet just because the trumpet is syncopated.

Overall major points: Your rhythm, object emphasis, consistency, and spacing emphasis all need serious work.
Shiguma
476 posts
Joined May 2014
Topic Starter
Shiguma

Mun wrote:

change top diff name to diabeetus
00:00:458 (3) - slider gave me crippling depression, please just use a red node and make a more balanced hook-curve No red node but i tried balancing the slider more
00:01:996 (4) - This is both a strong kick and a new note in the brass section. It's extremely strong, but it's mapped in an extremely boring, non-differentiated way. Just Logic Agenting a slider isn't enough to differentiate such a strong sound. see 00:02:766 (6) - 00:03:535 (1) - 00:04:112 (2) - 00:04:689 (4) - There is spacing emphasis for them, also randomly throwing shade on LA for no reason lol
00:08:150 - Throughout this section, you seem to disregard downbeats completely. The section isn't split up into patterns, it's just a bunch of jumps with a few circles seemingly arbitrarily replaced with kicksliders. It's just jump-spam, and everything from spacing to visual distance to rhythm needs work. Downbeats are "disregarded" for the melody, the places where you think I've put arbitrary kicksliders have sounds on the slidertails. rhythm doesn't need work, what i've mapped to is consistent. if you want to explain visual distance in further detail i'll be able to see if it needs fixing
00:16:996 (8) - held trumpet, gets shortened to half a beat, 00:17:381 (1) - staccato trumpet, gets lengthened to half a beat. 00:16:996 (8) - There's a sound on the red tick, 00:17:381 (1) - is made to match 00:18:150 (3) -
00:18:920 (7,1,2) - This disproportionately emphasizes both 00:19:112 (1) - with abnormal spacing for a relatively normal beat and 00:19:304 (2) - with an abnormal angle and spacing change causing extremely uncomfortable movement. Both of these turn out much stronger than the downbeat itself. Also, NC on the downbeat, not the vocals. See: 00:21:996 (5,1,2) - 00:34:304 (7,1,2) - Reduced the spacing on 00:19:112 (1) - I've emphasized vocals in this diff throughout the map, nc'ing on downbeats wouldn't make sense
00:20:458 (1) - The vocals here are held, why shorten to 1/2 slider? See: 00:23:535 (1) - 00:35:843 (1) - 00:48:920 (4) - Because there are sounds on the red ticks, also its not like you expect 1/4th sliders for normal vocals even though technically they are held
00:43:535 - For one, this is a major downbeat that isn't NC'd. For two, this section is a massive intensity jump from before, but the map itself does not make that obvious. The rhythm remains just as simple with no density increase, and this is fine, but movement and spacing also goes almost entirely unchanged. My nc's are to the vocals, I'll increase the spacing for this section until 00:49:304 -
00:50:073 (3) - You can get away with emphasizing these more by lengthening them to 3/4 with the trumpet. 00:50:843 (3,1,2) - This would feel bad imo if 00:50:843 (3) - was also a 1/4th gap
I'll leave this diff at that, since I'm basically telling you to remap half of it to fix its consistency, rhythm, and sectioning issues. Dunno if those issues are really issues
Your NCs are almost all offbeat, why? Go look at what i mapped to and then you'll know why

insane
00:00:458 (3) - why do you have an aversion to good sliders :(
00:02:766 (3) - If you're going to emphasize 00:01:996 (1) - the exact same sound with highly uncomfortable movement, do the same here. 00:01:420 (4,5) - Ctrl + g'd these
00:16:131 (2,3,4,5) - You seem to be really selectively implementing these streams, and I don't get why. This one (and 00:12:958 (2,3,4,5,6) - ), for example, seems to be mapped to nothing at all. Any 1/4 behind it is nearly inaudible. However, much louder 1/4 drum patterns like those around 00:14:304 - go completely ignored. This is pretty grossly unrepresentative of the song. The sounds are there, I'll add the louder 1/4th drums
00:14:304 (1) - 00:15:266 (4) - This dip in pitch is pretty common in this intense intro to the song, and yet it goes completely unappreciated. The map seems to be ignoring them instead of using them to its advantage. Indeed
00:16:996 (7) - held sound into 00:17:381 (1) - staccato, but both are the same length of slider Same reasoning as before
00:17:381 (1,3) - If you're gonna use a squiggly slider, try to fit the sliders around it into that squiggly slider so it doesn't look so comically out of place. Okay
00:18:920 (1,2,3) - 00:21:996 (1,2,3) - 00:25:073 (1,2,3) - 00:26:612 (1,2,3) - All of these patterns have one thing in common: really silly emphasis. Vocals go entirely ignored, but it's not entirely obvious until the last example, where an extremely strong note is totally ignored for a quiet, repetitive background instrumental. I'd say its obvious right from here 00:18:920 (1) - as the start of the vocals is on a slidertail
00:36:804 (3,4,5,1) - If you're gonna map it this way, map the same vocal pattern 00:38:343 (6,7,8,1) - the same way, too. Changed
00:42:573 (2) - The sliderend feels like it falls on a pretty important note here. Yeah
00:57:381 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9) - Make a decision: are you using wide angle emphasis or are you not using wide angle emphasis? Because this uses wide angles to make several notes hard to hit, but this same form of movement exists almost nowhere else in the kiai. What's wrong with wide angles?
Although i changed this particular pattern
01:08:823 (4) - If you are going to ignore the kick, ignore it - don't shorten a slider and make it unrepresentative of the trumpet just because the trumpet is syncopated. Don't see how its unrepresentative of the trumpet

Overall major points: Your rhythm, object emphasis, consistency, and spacing emphasis all need serious work.
Thanks for the mod!
UndeadCapulet
1,100 posts
Joined April 2013
UndeadCapulet
mod for my cute mentee:

samosa

  1. 00:07:766 (9,10) - not much reason for the spacing here, kinda just filler jumping, detracts from the jump to the new melodylinestart and stuffs
  2. uh in general that introsynthstuff is mostly just the same back-and-forth-and-back-and-forth jumpmotioning overandoverandover without showing off any of the interesting melody changes
  3. 00:09:689 (9) - would probably not map this as a circle but instead have 00:09:496 (8) - be a 1/2 slider to keep rhythmic attention to the melodyline line you have throughout the map
  4. 00:18:727 (6,7) - similar thing to ^, tho its more understandable wanting to click here. if you don't like the 1/2 slider perhaps just move 6,7 closer together so the upcoming vocal line stands out more with a bigger jump
  5. 00:20:843 (2,3) - these sliderheads are rly close together, and i think the resulting cursormotion is underwhelming, the player hovers over the 3 slider forever before clicking. try something like https://puu.sh/xXAAk/1933805788.png idk
  6. 00:26:612 (5) - slider here (or even the whole triple) could use a sharper/stronger directionchange to emphasize the strong vocal
  7. 00:27:573 (8,9) - this is a much harsherfeeling kickslider arrange than anything in the more intense section, really don't think it's necessary to have the player travel back along the sliderbody here
  8. 00:33:535 (3,4,5,6,7) - rearranging to fit with the strings instrument pitch/intensitychanges would be nice here
  9. 00:39:304 (6,7) - not rly a reason to have this be 2 circles when 00:37:766 (5) - was a slider
  10. 00:47:189 (7) - nc to match 00:44:112 (1) -
  11. 00:50:458 (1,2,3) - matching the jump arrange you used at 00:49:689 (1,2,3) - more directly would make for a nice build feeling
  12. 00:51:227 (1,2) - these sliders lose so much power with the current arrange, the player goes from playing these sharp fast sliders at 00:50:073 (3,3) - to these superclustered ones, its really lame. think you should make more use of the sliderleniency stuffs you do in the kiai, maybe something along the lines of https://puu.sh/xXB11/ce05185284.png
  13. 00:55:746 (6,1) - repostioning this so its located similar to how 00:54:977 (3,4) - is located would make for a nice build feeling, rn the current location is really arbitrary and underwhelming imo
  14. 01:09:689 (1,2,3,4,5) - this is significantly less sliderleniency abuse than the previous 00:57:381 (1,2,3,4,5) - arrange, making this feel really underwhelming. same for 01:11:227 (1,2,3,4,5) - vs 00:59:208 (2,3,4,5) - (and even then i'd say just dont do any blanket arranging for either of those 2 spots lol)
  15. 01:12:381 (2,3,4) - try to rearrange so you dont lose the cute obtuse angle you had at 01:00:073 (2,3,4) -
  16. 01:20:266 (1,2) - really think you should change the rhythming here to respect the trumpet more, that downbeat isnt important enough for clicking imo, just convert 01:20:266 (1) - into a 1/2 slider. also 01:21:035 (6,7) - would be a nice 1/2 slider as well
awesome kiai stream arranges in general, mostly solid rhythming sense, and lovely nc usage, im so proud of my mentee's growth :>

---

insane

you kinda superrandomly ignore a bunch of drumbeats during the synth intro but then also randomly heavily focus them, like i dont get why 00:06:900 - is skipped here but then mapped at 00:09:977 - , or why 00:11:516 - is mapped but 00:08:439 - isn't, etc etc
this happens in the kiai as well
its also kinda weird how the intro here is denser than the topdiff lol

---

goldenwolf

your rhythming gets like way less dense at 00:43:535 - but the song is much more intense here, everything from here to 00:49:689 - is super underwhelming
kiai's a bit on the easy side as well compared to some other things in the map but its not that big a deal

---
Good luck!
Cote
275 posts
Joined January 2015
Cote

UndeadCapulet wrote:

mod for my cute mentee:
---

goldenwolf

your rhythming gets like way less dense at 00:43:535 - but the song is much more intense here, everything from here to 00:49:689 - is super underwhelming Okay, I've put more sliders and circles in some parts to have more consistency
kiai's a bit on the easy side as well compared to some other things in the map but its not that big a deal I've taken it anyway and added more circles and sliders

---
Good luck!
Thanks! :)

SPOILER
osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 57285
Countdown: 0
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.5
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 32
TimelineZoom: 1.7

[Metadata]
Title:Hey! Calorie Queen
TitleUnicode:Hey! カロリーQueen
Artist:Taketatsu Ayana
ArtistUnicode:竹達 彩奈
Creator:Shiguma
Version:Wolf's Normal
Source:だがしかし
Tags:Cris- wolf3211 Dagashi Kashi ed ending tv size
BeatmapID:1436116
BeatmapSetID:671225

[Difficulty]
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CircleSize:3.5
OverallDifficulty:4
ApproachRate:5
SliderMultiplier:1.2
SliderTickRate:1

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292,72,44112,1,0,0:0:0:0:
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352,168,44689,2,0,L|340:232,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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188,244,48727,1,0,0:0:0:0:
152,292,48920,2,0,P|92:268|28:284,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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80,52,50073,1,4,0:0:0:0:
160,140,50458,2,0,L|229:131,1,60,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
264,172,50842,1,4,0:0:0:0:
364,240,51227,6,0,B|408:249|408:249|455:235,2,90,8|8|8,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
388,184,51996,2,0,L|396:56,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
276,76,52766,6,0,P|216:88|160:52,1,120,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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20,224,53920,2,0,L|32:296,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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244,100,58343,2,0,L|232:24,2,60,0|8|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
200,144,58920,2,0,B|140:160|140:160|76:144,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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152,280,60073,2,0,L|220:272,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
268,292,60458,6,0,P|324:308|384:260,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
408,228,61035,1,0,0:0:0:0:
420,168,61227,2,0,L|408:32,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
304,104,61996,2,0,P|248:88|188:136,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
152,156,62573,1,0,0:0:0:0:
92,156,62766,2,0,B|112:212|112:212|92:276,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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432,340,64304,2,0,L|424:268,1,60,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
380,240,64689,2,0,L|388:168,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
408,124,65073,2,0,P|380:80|296:88,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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224,228,66227,1,8,0:0:0:0:
256,344,66612,6,0,B|200:328|200:328|140:344|140:344|80:328,1,180,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
136,220,67573,2,0,L|132:132,1,60,0|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
148,100,67958,1,0,0:0:0:0:
148,100,68150,2,0,P|88:88|44:128,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
0,236,68920,1,2,0:0:0:0:
44,348,69304,1,8,0:0:0:0:
164,340,69689,6,0,P|220:352|264:304,1,120,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
368,260,70458,1,2,0:0:0:0:
368,260,70650,2,0,L|428:264,2,60,0|8|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
332,212,71227,2,0,B|312:156|312:156|332:88,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
224,40,71996,1,2,0:0:0:0:
160,136,72381,1,8,0:0:0:0:
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248,320,74689,1,8,0:0:0:0:
356,268,75073,2,0,P|415:278|457:228,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
452,180,75650,1,0,0:0:0:0:
424,124,75843,6,0,P|364:113|322:163,1,120,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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228,252,76996,2,0,L|216:320,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
164,336,77381,2,0,P|104:348|60:308,2,120,2|8|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
124,220,78535,1,8,0:0:0:0:
64,116,78920,6,0,B|120:128|120:128|184:104,1,120,4|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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284,100,79689,2,0,L|276:228,1,120,2|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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132,260,81227,1,2,0:0:0:0:
36,192,81612,2,0,L|40:124,1,60,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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304,116,82766,1,2,0:0:0:0:
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80,292,84881,1,8,0:0:0:0:
108,240,85073,6,0,P|148:156|84:96,1,180,4|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
120,44,85843,1,4,0:0:0:0:
256,192,86035,12,0,88150,0:0:0:0:
Shiguma
476 posts
Joined May 2014
Topic Starter
Shiguma

UndeadCapulet wrote:

mod for my cute mentee:

samosa

  1. 00:07:766 (9,10) - not much reason for the spacing here, kinda just filler jumping, detracts from the jump to the new melodylinestart and stuffs
  2. uh in general that introsynthstuff is mostly just the same back-and-forth-and-back-and-forth jumpmotioning overandoverandover without showing off any of the interesting melody changes maybe this version is better
  3. 00:09:689 (9) - would probably not map this as a circle but instead have 00:09:496 (8) - be a 1/2 slider to keep rhythmic attention to the melodyline line you have throughout the map i tried it as 1/2 stacked, i think that might be good

  4. 00:18:727 (6,7) - similar thing to ^, tho its more understandable wanting to click here. if you don't like the 1/2 slider perhaps just move 6,7 closer together so the upcoming vocal line stands out more with a bigger jump i make it smol spacing
  5. 00:20:843 (2,3) - these sliderheads are rly close together, and i think the resulting cursormotion is underwhelming, the player hovers over the 3 slider forever before clicking. try something like https://puu.sh/xXAAk/1933805788.png idk i tried something
  6. 00:26:612 (5) - slider here (or even the whole triple) could use a sharper/stronger directionchange to emphasize the strong vocal k
  7. 00:27:573 (8,9) - this is a much harsherfeeling kickslider arrange than anything in the more intense section, really don't think it's necessary to have the player travel back along the sliderbody here i made the spacing less, dont think its too harsh to go backwards here though
  8. 00:33:535 (3,4,5,6,7) - rearranging to fit with the strings instrument pitch/intensitychanges would be nice here im confused as to how to do that
  9. 00:39:304 (6,7) - not rly a reason to have this be 2 circles when 00:37:766 (5) - was a slider ok
  10. 00:47:189 (7) - nc to match 00:44:112 (1) - ok
  11. 00:50:458 (1,2,3) - matching the jump arrange you used at 00:49:689 (1,2,3) - more directly would make for a nice build feeling tried to make it more related
  12. 00:51:227 (1,2) - these sliders lose so much power with the current arrange, the player goes from playing these sharp fast sliders at 00:50:073 (3,3) - to these superclustered ones, its really lame. think you should make more use of the sliderleniency stuffs you do in the kiai, maybe something along the lines of https://puu.sh/xXB11/ce05185284.png i moved it
  13. 00:55:746 (6,1) - repostioning this so its located similar to how 00:54:977 (3,4) - is located would make for a nice build feeling, rn the current location is really arbitrary and underwhelming imo how about this then
  14. 01:09:689 (1,2,3,4,5) - this is significantly less sliderleniency abuse than the previous 00:57:381 (1,2,3,4,5) - arrange, making this feel really underwhelming. same for 01:11:227 (1,2,3,4,5) - vs 00:59:208 (2,3,4,5) - (and even then i'd say just dont do any blanket arranging for either of those 2 spots lol) fixed
  15. 01:12:381 (2,3,4) - try to rearrange so you dont lose the cute obtuse angle you had at 01:00:073 (2,3,4) - changing this doesnt feel like anything significant would occur to me
  16. 01:20:266 (1,2) - really think you should change the rhythming here to respect the trumpet more, that downbeat isnt important enough for clicking imo, just convert 01:20:266 (1) - into a 1/2 slider. also 01:21:035 (6,7) - would be a nice 1/2 slider as well meh
awesome kiai stream arranges in general, mostly solid rhythming sense, and lovely nc usage, im so proud of my mentee's growth :>

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insane

you kinda superrandomly ignore a bunch of drumbeats during the synth intro but then also randomly heavily focus them, like i dont get why 00:06:900 - is skipped here but then mapped at 00:09:977 - , or why 00:11:516 - is mapped but 00:08:439 - isn't, etc etc
this happens in the kiai as well
its also kinda weird how the intro here is denser than the topdiff lol ill fix this in the next update

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Good luck!
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