pieguy1372 wrote:

General:

-add kiai from 04:08:980 to 04:36:973?

Normal:

00:40:286 (1) - remove whistle on end? (or perhaps on (2))
01:21:025 (7) - new combo
01:24:274 (2) - add whistle?
01:24:774 (3,4,5,6,7) - perhaps lower the volume on these notes? since tone is getting softer

Clare:

01:26:274 (7,8) - perhaps lower the volume on these notes?

Collab:

00:39:786 (5) - remove whistle on start?
02:06:263 (9) - new combo?
02:57:000 (1) - replace this with a circle?
03:24:992 (6) - new combo?
04:06:731 (5) - remove finish?

nice map, so relaxing -w-

• - kiai 只加前面一段嗎?
  - Slider tick rate 貌似已經不能用0.5了..

• - Alace
  個人感覺45%的finish聽起來不太舒服...
  01:52:017 (8) - 這邊slider結尾的finish降個5~8%如何呢
  
  - KanaRin
  03:57:733 (2,3,4) - 這邊略掉一個鼓點的處理方式不好吧...
  
  - eveless
  整段提高音量? (45~55%)
  
  
  
  Clare
  [list:6b82d]

1. Timing:有些地方還是有off阿.03:27:991 - 這裏,有不知道是鼓手抽風還是怎樣的...
2. Tag:加上collab所有mapper的名稱

1. 00:31:039 (2) - 這個間距怎麼回事?是誤操作嗎?這個跳完全破壞了flow阿....而且在Normal裏面跳對新手不太好啊.

1. 00:53:033 (1) - 感覺這條slider可以再畫好一點,比如這個 ,動一動折點就可以了
2. 02:24:008 (5,1) - 其實我覺得這樣的new combo stack很醜,個人覺得在(5)-上面加上New combo 然後在(1)- Remove 會比較好
3. 03:25:992 (X) - IMO,這裡應該加一個note,因為這裡踩鼓點而且x xxx x比x x x x x會好..後這新手可能會抓不來,所以也不建議放太多.後這相對會比較好
4. 04:07:481 (7) - (Design mod)感覺這裏不應該是用2個1拍輕輕帶過就算,因為1/3在這裏很強,帶過了就會有缺點東西的感覺,所以我建議這裏還是放1/3比較好.在design方面,我建議用一條slider(1/3)不停reverse就好了,位置你可以與(6)- 平衡,最後在04:08:730 (8) - remove clap.
5. 04:21:727 (3) - 間距和之前有點不一樣,雖然沒差,但我還是建議修一修,之後,(design mod)04:22:227 (4) - 這個打橫拉直然後排在(3)- 的後面,像這樣

1. 01:12:028 (1) ~ 01:27:773 - 沒實體的問題,但是請檢察這部分的3連,很多白線起的3連違和感滿載,打起來很怪,試試修改?
2. 03:58:733 (5,1) - 這2個notes的對比和之前差太多了,這個挑比較大,和flow對不上...至少把他縮短一下間距,不然打起來不太好.

1. 00:35:787 (6) - 這個有微小spacing 問題,最好關了grid snap之後fix一下.
2. 00:54:032 (4,5,6) - 這裡遮有點意義不明,畢竟你這張整體來說也不太遮,而且這裏也沒達到"可以讓玩家更享受這部分"的條件,所以建議換一個位置
3. 02:23:758 (2) - Remove finish?這裏不是一個重音,所以加finish(而且那麼大聲)會有違和感,我寧願加在02:25:008 (3) - 的頭上面.
4. 02:36:255 (2,3) - (design mod)其實這2個可以畫好一點?現在看起來這2個slider是歪的,而且也不太美觀,試試這個?
   Here's the code:

   35,79,156255,2,0,B|32:127|66:152,1,70
   132,156,156755,2,0,B|167:159|182:116,1,70

5. 03:25:742 (7,8) - 把這2個notes疊好在(3.4)-上面把,要疊不疊的樣子真的很怪.
6. 03:51:985 (3) - 你是不是在(3)-的開頭漏了個clap?

kanpakyin wrote:

好把,托了那麼就確實不好意思

[General]

1. Timing:有些地方還是有off阿.03:27:991 - 這裏,有不知道是鼓手抽風還是怎樣的...
2. Tag:加上collab所有mapper的名稱

[Normal]
Issue/unrankable stuff
(Something bad in gameplay or unrankable staff,you should take a look on it.)

1. 00:31:039 (2) - 這個間距怎麼回事?是誤操作嗎?這個跳完全破壞了flow阿....而且在Normal裏面跳對新手不太好啊.

Beatmap design/suggestion
(These are totally suggestion only,you can ignore them if you disagree.)

1. 00:53:033 (1) - 感覺這條slider可以再畫好一點,比如這個 ,動一動折點就可以了
2. 02:24:008 (5,1) - 其實我覺得這樣的new combo stack很醜,個人覺得在(5)-上面加上New combo 然後在(1)- Remove 會比較好
3. 03:25:992 (X) - IMO,這裡應該加一個note,因為這裡踩鼓點而且x xxx x比x x x x x會好..後這新手可能會抓不來,所以也不建議放太多.後這相對會比較好
4. 04:07:481 (7) - (Design mod)感覺這裏不應該是用2個1拍輕輕帶過就算,因為1/3在這裏很強,帶過了就會有缺點東西的感覺,所以我建議這裏還是放1/3比較好.在design方面,我建議用一條slider(1/3)不停reverse就好了,位置你可以與(6)- 平衡,最後在04:08:730 (8) - remove clap.
5. 04:21:727 (3) - 間距和之前有點不一樣,雖然沒差,但我還是建議修一修,之後,(design mod)04:22:227 (4) - 這個打橫拉直然後排在(3)- 的後面,像這樣

[Clare]
Issue/unrankable stuff
(Something bad in gameplay or unrankable staff,you should take a look on it.)

1. 01:12:028 (1) ~ 01:27:773 - 沒實體的問題,但是請檢察這部分的3連,很多白線起的3連違和感滿載,打起來很怪,試試修改?
2. 03:58:733 (5,1) - 這2個notes的對比和之前差太多了,這個挑比較大,和flow對不上...至少把他縮短一下間距,不然打起來不太好.

Beatmap design/suggestion
(These are totally suggestion only,you can ignore them if you disagree.)

1. 00:35:787 (6) - 這個有微小spacing 問題,最好關了grid snap之後fix一下.
2. 00:54:032 (4,5,6) - 這裡遮有點意義不明,畢竟你這張整體來說也不太遮,而且這裏也沒達到"可以讓玩家更享受這部分"的條件,所以建議換一個位置
3. 02:23:758 (2) - Remove finish?這裏不是一個重音,所以加finish(而且那麼大聲)會有違和感,我寧願加在02:25:008 (3) - 的頭上面.
4. 02:36:255 (2,3) - (design mod)其實這2個可以畫好一點?現在看起來這2個slider是歪的,而且也不太美觀,試試這個?
   Here's the code:

   35,79,156255,2,0,B|32:127|66:152,1,70
   132,156,156755,2,0,B|167:159|182:116,1,70

5. 03:25:742 (7,8) - 把這2個notes疊好在(3.4)-上面把,要疊不疊的樣子真的很怪.
6. 03:51:985 (3) - 你是不是在(3)-的開頭漏了個clap?

That's it!

Unflagging wrote:

:) 哇，Clare & 大家，你们真棒。 很喜欢这个图。

:arrow Normal:
01:25:024 (4,5): 两个滑条在timeline上都后移两格（半拍）效果会好一些。

collab :
你看看这个小节这样改好不好。

把04:35:473(2) 和 04:35:848(4)删除。
04:34:973 (1): 稍微拉长此滑条，把原先的3格改为4格 。
把现在的（2）(也就是最原先的（3）) 移至04:36:129的时间点（这个时间点在timeline上是红线的位置）。
04:35:973(3) (最原先是(5)) : 稍微拉长此滑条。把原先的3格改为4格。

Come on! Clare！You are awesome
My best wishes! Good luck with this map! XD

Breeze wrote:

Timing

1. 我测出offset是1055 (+8), 如果你觉得这个更好的话就换这个吧, 如果改了offset记得resnap all notes, 然后至少确认声音改变, KIAI, BPM改变的绿线对准

下面的mod是以我给的offset来算的

Normal

1. 02:25:016 - KIAI感觉应该从这儿开始

Clare

1. 01:22:158 (4) - 稍微再往左上一点感觉会更好看, 和slider之间的衔接会觉得更合适
   [attachment=0:fe8e5]0.jpg[/attachment:fe8e5]
2. 01:45:027 - 02:22:267 - 怎么想着这段用finish音来打节奏, 除了01:59:023 - 02:00:773这段的finish音我觉得比较合适, 其他部分感觉听着不是那么顺, 只是个人感觉
3. 02:25:016 - KIAI感觉应该从这儿开始, 这里可以加个finish
4. 02:26:016 (7) - 这里难道是把clap错加成finish了?
5. 02:34:014 (9) - 看来不是错加了, clap感觉好些, finish音这里略奇怪, 看你自己觉得了, 后面还有些这种我也不多说了
6. 03:32:998 (1) - 加个finish或者clap?
7. 03:50:993 (1) - 这个跳得有点突然, 我觉得还是常规spacing好点
8. 03:58:991 (1) - ^
9. 04:04:989 (1,2,1) - clap代替whistle感觉更好

collab

1. 04:34:981 (1,2,3,4,5) - 这几个note还真难把握, 纳尼, 居然是1/3拍的, spacing是不是再近点好些, 这样太误导人了

nice map
star

1. The spacing looks a bit high to me. It makes some of the pattern quite difficult... Also, AR 5 is... too high for a Normal diff, especially on such a slow song. Making an Easy would be ideal, I think, but not absolutely needed.
2. The first section has very low volume; I could hardly hear the hitsounds. Raise it a bit ?
3. 00:29:047 (1) - This sounds a lot better to me if you reduce its total length by 1/2 (that is, the first repeat ends on a red tick, so the whole slider ends on a white tick). That way, the slider will match both the vocals (first repeat) and the drums (its end) and be more intuitive rhythm-wise !
4. 00:39:294 (3) - To match the vocals, make it only 1/2 long ?
5. 00:40:294 (1,2) - You should reverse this timeline to match lyrics better here again. I mean, start with a circle, then a 1/1 slider 1/2 later.
6. 01:20:283 (6,1) - Remove new combo on (1) and add one on (6) to stay consistent in your comboing.
7. 02:24:016 (1,2) - Add a new combo on (2) and remove the first one to stay consistent in your comboing.
8. 03:16:003 (1,2) - Same.
9. 03:20:001 (1,2) - Same.
10. 04:07:489 (7) - I really think this is too confusing for a Normal. Kick sliders themselves are confuisng because the number of repeats cannot be expected nor read (because the cursor hides the repeat arrows), but 1/3 is just extra confusing here D:

• You shouldn't use such low OD for such "high" AR. It's weird.

• Since no mapper has several parts in the map, I'm not going to use boxes. ><

1. You *really* should SB in the names of the mappers. D:
2. 04:05:739 (3,4,5) - This stack looks bad in-game. D: You can either manually stack them, either unstack them.
3. 04:34:981 (1,2,3,4,5) - That was pretty surprising, I didn't expect 1/3 at all here. Use a repeat slider instead ? Just for a few beats at least to show it's 1/3 ?

Odaril wrote:

As per your request.

Please reply to this mod saying what you didn't fix (and what you did) and why.
Also, if you have any question, feel free to ask me in-game.

General

Normal

1. The spacing looks a bit high to me. It makes some of the pattern quite difficult... Also, AR 5 is... too high for a Normal diff, especially on such a slow song. Making an Easy would be ideal, I think, but not absolutely needed.i wait your easy
2. The first section has very low volume; I could hardly hear the hitsounds. Raise it a bit ?ok
3. 00:29:047 (1) - This sounds a lot better to me if you reduce its total length by 1/2 (that is, the first repeat ends on a red tick, so the whole slider ends on a white tick). That way, the slider will match both the vocals (first repeat) and the drums (its end) and be more intuitive rhythm-wise !fixed
4. 00:39:294 (3) - To match the vocals, make it only 1/2 long ?ok
5. 00:40:294 (1,2) - You should reverse this timeline to match lyrics better here again. I mean, start with a circle, then a 1/1 slider 1/2 later.ok
6. 01:20:283 (6,1) - Remove new combo on (1) and add one on (6) to stay consistent in your comboing.fixed
7. 02:24:016 (1,2) - Add a new combo on (2) and remove the first one to stay consistent in your comboing.fixed
8. 03:16:003 (1,2) - Same.fixed
9. 03:20:001 (1,2) - Same.fixed
10. 04:07:489 (7) - I really think this is too confusing for a Normal. Kick sliders themselves are confuisng because the number of repeats cannot be expected nor read (because the cursor hides the repeat arrows), but 1/3 is just extra confusing here D:

fixed

Clare

• You shouldn't use such low OD for such "high" AR. It's weird.

fixed

Collab

• Since no mapper has several parts in the map, I'm not going to use boxes. ><

1. You *really* should SB in the names of the mappers. D:okay i'll add SB
2. 04:05:739 (3,4,5) - This stack looks bad in-game. D: You can either manually stack them, either unstack them.
3. 04:34:981 (1,2,3,4,5) - That was pretty surprising, I didn't expect 1/3 at all here. Use a repeat slider instead ? Just for a few beats at least to show it's 1/3 ?

i'll ask mapper

I really love the song ~.~

IceBeam wrote:

hello
as you requested

shouldn't the title be Ichiban no Takaramono ~Yui final ver.~ with separated "~" from the main title?

also,you could crop 2.png in lrc folder,I mostly mean borders and that free space from the right
same for all nicknames for SB folder

[Normal]
it's kinda hard to mod when the easier diff isn't snapped with DS
and yeah,I think you will need an easier diff,Odaril will make it if I got it right? yes

00:40:294 (1,2) - it should be farther..in case of previous patterns distance looks like 1/1
01:59:023 - clap seems to fit here perfectly
01:59:773 - ^
02:38:263 (5,6) - this stack doesn't play so good,as it freezes the flow so much..slider from 02:38:762 would be perfect
04:08:239 (1,2) - sorry,but position looks weird,maybe you can place these sliders above the 04:06:239 (6)? otherwise,because of previous hitburst we have this:

SPOILER

04:08:988 - clap?

[Clare]
01:06:787 (2,3) - in sliders stacked this way,stacking doesn't occur..and zero leniency might be considered as unrankable
01:14:785 (2,3) - ^
03:34:997 (1,2,3) - so wrong spacing ;~; distance is 1/1 between all of them,so make the equal spacing,please..
03:42:995 (1,2,3) - ^
03:50:993 (1,2,3) - ^
03:58:991 (1,2,3) - ^
04:06:989 - clap?
04:08:988 (3) - ^
04:10:988 (1,2,3) - again bad spacing :<
04:25:984 (4,1) - why are they so close to each other? :\ and overlap doesn't look so good

[Collab]
00:18:800 (4) - shorten to previous red tick and add a note to 00:19:550
01:24:782 (4) - new combo
03:25:000 (1,2) - no,please..clear up these objects
04:17:986 (3) - repeat is wrong..better delete this object,add a circle to 04:17:986 and then make a slider from 04:18:236 to 04:18:736
04:18:986 (1,2,3,4) - what the....why it's snapped on 1/6? I don't think it's a good idea
04:34:981 (1,2,3,1) - ^
04:50:477 (5,1,2) - blue tick is soo unexpected..unstack please and show the correct spacing

alright,I'm done
good luck with it

Odaril wrote:

I'm done !
Took me some time. ><

[attachment=0:8368f]Girls Dead Monster - Ichiban no Takaramono~Yui final ver.~ (Clare) [Odaril's Easy].osu[/attachment:8368f]

SapphireGhost wrote:

[General]
- [Collab] has different kiai times than the other difficulties, but there doesn't really seem to be any good reason to have it that way, so I'd advise just making them all consistent.where? i don't find different kiai times
- It would be great if all the difficulties ended at the same time, so all players can see the last part of the storyboard.i think it's fine,because i want other difficulties be rank not App
- The breaks are sort of long, but I guess they can pass.
- Are you sure the BPM is correct?maybe it's fine?
- Also, are you sure the title is spaced properly?SURE.

[Collab]
- Some things about Kanon's part; I couldn't tell what the 1/4 notes were following, if they were following any part of the music at all. Also, there were several slight overlaps that weren't very visually appealing, if you'd care to space those out a bit more.
01:01:039 (3,4,5) - The switch from 1.21x to 2.04x spacing here is very awkward and it would probably be best to use more consistent spacing.
02:39:512 (2,1) - (1) is being covered by (2) in such a way that it's a bit hard to see, can you try to make these not overlap as much?
02:57:008 (1) - This doesn't really fit as a slider, as it awkwardly extends into the break. Just make it into a regular note.
03:28:124 (1) - This spinner sounds better with the end snapped to 1/1 as opposed to 1/6.
04:35:981 (3,1,1) - The jumps are sort of extreme here, 3.40x spacing at one point. Try to put them a little closer together.

[Clare]
- There were a lot of small overlaps here that didn't look very good, and it felt overmapped at times, but those are just comments.
02:09:020 (3,4) - (3) is covering (4) by a lot, try to take (4) out from under (3).ok i fixed!
02:26:266 (1,2,3,4) - I don't understand why the spacing increases so much here, then goes back to normal immediately afterwards. Try to use gradual acceleration/deceleration.ok i fixed!
02:52:509 (3,4) - There's really no need for a jump here. Actually, looking further through the map, it seems like there are lots of parts with odd spacing changes, so I don't know what to say...ok i fixed!
02:57:008 - Drag break to this point like Odaril did.i change this like Collab
03:39:996 (3) - This slider doesn't look very nice, there's always the slider guide for making nice symmetrical waves, and it doesn't need to be perfectly symmetrical, but a more natural curve would look nicer here.you are right! fixed
03:40:996 (1,2,3,4,5) - I don't really like how (5) seems to be getting covered up by (1,2,3). You can see the effect of this here, the slider is getting covered up by the hitbursts. Basically, try to space things so they don't overlap.fixed!
03:48:994 (1,2,3,4,5) - Same as above. Actually, now that I look further into the map, this seems to be happening a lot, so you just decide what you want to do.fixed
04:25:484 (3,4) - Even though there are a lot of odd spacing changes in this map, there is no reason why the spacing should randomly switch to 2.90x here, please tone down the jump by a bit.fixed
04:33:232 (1,2,3,4) - Oh god, spacing goes up to 4.37x, please please please tone down the jumps. By a lot.fixed
04:35:981 (1,2,3) - Lastly, (2,3) is getting covered by (1) in an ugly way, try to remove the overlap.fixed

[Normal]
- I modded this difficulty last, so I probably missed a bunch of stuff. Oh well.
03:28:999 - Drag the break to this point like Odaril did.ok

[Odaril's Easy]
00:34:796 (1,2,3) - Try to make these blanket a bit better and avoid overlap.
01:26:782 (3) - It's possible a new player could get confused by this slider, not a big issue but worth noting.
02:01:023 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - This combo seems rather long in comparison to the other ones, but I'm not sure how you would split it up.
04:24:984 (1,2) - Not sure about this. The majority of the map consists of non-overlapping 1/1 patterns and 1/2 sliders, so it seems weird that you would break the consistency here.
04:29:733 (2,3) - Same as above.

Lastly, try to get two or three mods for [Odaril's Easy] before asking for a re-check. Then go ahead and forum PM me and I'll be back. Like I said, I might have missed some stuff, so expect that.

SapphireGhost wrote:

[Odaril's Easy]
00:34:796 (1,2,3) - Try to make these blanket a bit better and avoid overlap. There's no overlap. The sliders are glued to each other though which is what I was trying to acheive.
01:26:782 (3) - It's possible a new player could get confused by this slider, not a big issue but worth noting. Yeah... I absolutely wanted to make the tremolo though. D: I made the wave more obvious.
02:01:023 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - This combo seems rather long in comparison to the other ones, but I'm not sure how you would split it up. Added new combo on (3).
04:24:984 (1,2) - Not sure about this. The majority of the map consists of non-overlapping 1/1 patterns and 1/2 sliders, so it seems weird that you would break the consistency here. Changed.
04:29:733 (2,3) - Same as above. Changed.

Lastly, try to get two or three mods for [Odaril's Easy] before asking for a re-check. Then go ahead and forum PM me and I'll be back. Like I said, I might have missed some stuff, so expect that. B-but ;_;

• - maybe better if follow rhythm/vocal only

Pokie wrote:

Odaril's

• - maybe better if follow rhythm/vocal only

00:48:292 (5) - better move it to 1/2 forward Made a 1/2 slider.
02:16:268 (5) - ^ Same.
02:29:015 (1) - remove whistle at the end of slider, sounds weird while clap+whistle Hm... okay
02:41:012 (1) - lower volume by 15%? No, I don't think the volume needs to be lowered. D:
03:47:994 (5,6,1) - lower by 5~8% Same.
04:20:985 (1) - same with 02:41:012 (1) Same as well


good diff here Thanks

SapphireGhost wrote:

[Collab]
- Some things about Kanon's part; I couldn't tell what the 1/4 notes were following, if they were following any part of the music at all. Also, there were several slight overlaps that weren't very visually appealing, if you'd care to space those out a bit more.
It's following the vocal. about the additional beat, i think it's rhythmical. so it's fine imo.
01:01:039 (3,4,5) - The switch from 1.21x to 2.04x spacing here is very awkward and it would probably be best to use more consistent spacing. change some slider here, fixed the spacing

DarkRingSystem wrote:

:roll: 耶~
[Odaril's easy]


Just suggests~
00:48:292 (5) - move it 1/2 forward
00:48:542 (X) - add a circle here~
THese two were addressed before you modded. =P

00:17:050~00:31:796
follow rhythm of guitar in a easy diff is not a good idea IMO
new players don,t know the rhythm .They just play by watching and feeling weird.
It's fine. The guitar does stand out in the beginning. And the rhythms used by the guitar are simpler than the rhythms used later in the song by the vocals.

Other is fine to me ~

bakabaka wrote:

As per Clare request:

[Odaril's Easy]

01:11:536-add circle ? Not a circle. But I'm fine with making this a 1/2 slider.

01:27:531-I think Break time at 01:29:031- start is more batter~ The break originally started there. I have no idea why it doesn't anymore.


haha~nice map

SapphireGhost wrote:

Some last issues of concern...
- On [Collab], I'd really encourage you change 03:28:124 (1) - to end at 03:28:999. It fits with the rest of the difficulties that also have the break begin at that point. Also, the end sounds better at at least 30% volume, but definitely don't go as low as 5%.
- The title change caused two .osb files to be created, oops. Go ahead and get rid of the unused one.

I think that's it? So yeah, contact me again after this stuff. Sorry for missing it earlier.

SapphireGhost wrote:

Hmm.
Somehow, the download glitched. The Song Folder still has two .osb files and [Odaril's Easy] couldn't be downloaded. Make sure that the bad .osb file is gone, and then Full Submit again to see if it fixes this.