...it's a pretty difficult question. I've been rather open with my thoughts, and it's hard to really figure out whether I've told something to anyone before.
well,
there was a fairly high chance i wouldn't have been alive now. my mentality was never the greatest, and a couple years ago, it had gotten pretty bad.
i did consider suicide at some point. i don't really think there was much stopping me in my mind. apathy was a double-edged sword, i could feel indifferent to the shit i put up with, but i also felt indifferent to how things would be had i killed myself. i just didn't care.
the part i have told people about, was how i avoided actually doing it. i've mentioned how i'd prevented it all with a line of thought that somehow just stopped me from caring at all about the option to actually kill myself. i concluded that death was as pointless as life.
along with a few other incidents, i'd say i'm somewhat lucky to be alive.
i'd rather see where things go, i suppose.
and i just want to see what i've envisioned be played out. i'm always interested to see how stories could potentially end.
eh.
1, 2, 3.