Written on October 29th, 2024

Tomorrow is the 18th anniversary of the death of my brother, Stefan. He was technically my half-brother, but in life, I always saw him as more than that. He was 24 years old.

At some point before his passing, we watched the Rhapsody in Blue segment from the movie Fantasia 2000. He provided rapid-fire commentary as the short unfolded, pointing out all the absurd details within the cartoon. I was rolling on the floor laughing at his comments, whether he mentioned the cat falling in the milk bottle, the packed subways, or the sheer size of the piano player's chin. Watching this short by his side is my fondest memory of him.

I always wanted to learn this song on the piano to pay homage to Stefan. However, as a decent, but not amazing piano player, I needed more skill (or perhaps discipline) to learn the song in its entirety. What I've done here is, to my mind, the next best way to honor his memory.

Mapping this song firmly challenged my established notions about mapping in general. Though I already knew that different people create for different reasons, there was more to it than that. I realized that the source of my dislike toward some of my most hated maps over the years wasn't necessarily the quality of the maps, but the presence of leaderboards on those maps. Obviously, I have no problem with maps I hate being ranked, but if a map has a leaderboard, my competitive nature simply gets the better of me. I inherently assign ranked maps with my own goals, even if those goals are unreasonable. Not every map is best enjoyed with this mindset.

This mindset shift goes hand-in-hand with the creation of this map. I wouldn't say that this map isn't meant to be played, but the intentions are far different from any map I've ever created. I didn't just want to express how the song makes me feel, whether within my brotherly memory or anytime listening thereafter; I wanted to convey the feeling of actually playing this song on the piano. There are intricacies and crescendos that I would have felt I wasn't doing justice if I couldn't inject this map with some wildly unrankable elements. In many ways, I view this as less of a map and more of a performance. With that mindset, this map may not be for everyone, and especially may not be for people whose goal is always to get as high of a score as possible.

However, I am still extremely proud of this map as an homage to my favorite song of all time and to my loving brother. It's very likely that I will not submit any more maps after this, as I can't imagine any future project feeling as important to me as this one does. I'm not even sure mapping will feel the same.

My brother's memory lives on through this map. And I know that, whether in the next life or 1000 lives from now, we will find each other again and I will be able to tell you how much you were loved and how much you are missed.

9.9.1982 - 10.30.2006

-JW