Actually at first, I never had an intention about posting to this thread because I didn't find any meaning or fun in it but the other threads in this forum are any different? Expecting something meaningful from off-topic is quite foolish of me because we all know these threads are created to kill some time with posting bullshit around. Well, I'm saying this kind of things but I didn't even get interested in other forums. I'm just killing time here and not interested in discussing Osu! related things. I'm not interested in mapping and I'm not a good player enough to talk about maps with other people. It's already morning and I don't have any better thing to do, so I decided to make myself busy with this thread. I don't feel like drawing, I don't feel like watching something, I don't feel like talking with same people right now and I'm not sleepy. Whatever, I'm back in Turkey for days, I was thinking "I'll be pretty bored when I get back to Turkey" but it's not like that right now actually. I'm still in contact with my friends, I'm spending my time with them and you know all that friends shit. I feel refreshed and alive again. I miss my old days but still, I can look forward again. I feel that "independence". I have no place to dream of getting back. I've lost that place some weeks ago. Last months I was pretty depressed about something happened in my life but I think I'm forgetting all of those things day by day now. It's was what should happen, so I don't hesitate about anything. After some confessions I heard, I've lost my faith in people I've trusted most and they slowly started to fade away in my childish fantasies. And I've set them free. It's not like I let it go in sweet happiness like a cool guy. More like, I've choose to push it away in that heavy disappointment. So it wasn't like setting free. It was an execution in mind and heart. Yes yes. Everyone has freedom to choose their path and go. I gave it to the one that abandoned me but not myself. It was my worst mistake. It was pathetic. No one can appreciate me for that childish hypocrisy. And now, no one can judge me for walking away to be free. Oh and I don't know when the theme of this post changed into shitty events of my life. It was supposed to be about intellectual criticism and other cool shits but ended up talking about my own experiences and I feel ashamed for representing it to public. But alsoi
I feel not.
P.s What have I done...
