I just started mapping two weeks ago
I feel that, as I map more and more each day, the fresh imagination that I used to have of "what I think a map should be" began to fade.
...Actually, "fading" is not the right word. It's more like my sense of mapping got "mixed" with more and more foreign things as I learn.
Now, when I listen to a part of a song, I can't "picture" what pattern/sound/feeling should be anymore.
The picture in my mind become a swamp of mushes; fear of repetitive patterns, fear of putting wrong angle, fear of putting a "too brand" pattern. I notice that I don't map based on "what I want it to be" anymore. Now, I map on "what it should correctly be."
And that feels really scary. It's like I am starting to become someone else.
Things that I used to like become blurred. When I looked at a map, I asked myself: "What would the beginner me 2 weeks ago would picture it?" I cannot answer that question anymore. It's like I lost then imagination that I used to have.
I don't like this. What should I do? Please help T_T
Edit: Format the sentences to be easier to read
I feel that, as I map more and more each day, the fresh imagination that I used to have of "what I think a map should be" began to fade.
...Actually, "fading" is not the right word. It's more like my sense of mapping got "mixed" with more and more foreign things as I learn.
Now, when I listen to a part of a song, I can't "picture" what pattern/sound/feeling should be anymore.
The picture in my mind become a swamp of mushes; fear of repetitive patterns, fear of putting wrong angle, fear of putting a "too brand" pattern. I notice that I don't map based on "what I want it to be" anymore. Now, I map on "what it should correctly be."
And that feels really scary. It's like I am starting to become someone else.
Things that I used to like become blurred. When I looked at a map, I asked myself: "What would the beginner me 2 weeks ago would picture it?" I cannot answer that question anymore. It's like I lost then imagination that I used to have.
I don't like this. What should I do? Please help T_T
Edit: Format the sentences to be easier to read