Hana - Kuukirikigaku Shoujo to Shounen no Uta · forum

Lama Poluna

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2017-10-11T13:59:23+00:00

h4d0uk3n1 wrote:
прив, м4м

"Для сложности Mirash's Insane указаны другие тэги."
falls into the sky:
00:08:377 (2,3) - мб сделать их чтобы на одной линии лежали
00:10:685 (1,2,3,4) - тбх мне кажется мешать в одной дифе триплы и даблы после экстендед слайдеров мне не кажется хорошей идеей, играется это неловко, никакого вклада не дает Я фоловлю гитару, извини
00:41:509 (1,2) - это играется неловко учитывая спейсинг предыдущего комбо, совершенно неочевидно что это не 1/2 гап В смысле? То что они на таком спейсинге или то что они короткие? Я уменьшил спейсинг.
00:42:333 (1,2,3,1,2,3) - в данный момент на вторую (2) спейс больше чем ранее, хотя звук там тише чем все остальное ибо гитарный слайд, мне кажется такой ритм и нк подходит больше, таким образом емпахазис на высокий гитарный звук был бы,
Ну, звук возрастает, поэтому спейсинг на след тройку увеличиввается.
00:45:465 (1,2,3,4) - не ложится же на 1/2 Не понял
01:05:740 (1,2) - чего так близко, оч контрастирует со всем остальным в данной секции Там тихая нота вокала, я думаю все впорядке
01:09:366 (1,2,1,2) - под что это? Думаю теперь, но если еще раз напишут, пофиксю.
01:14:476 (1,2,1,2) - во второй (1) мало смысла ибо звука там такого же, как на первой (1) нет
Я хочу что бы эти слайдеры начинались с сильных битов, так и есть, думаю все в норме.

loreley:
00:02:443 - стоит выделить, тут же звук такой же как и 00:01:125 (4) -
00:01:289 (5,1) - свап нк?
00:03:762 - тоже клик сюда бы (00:09:037 (3) - причем позже на похожем моменте клик)
00:13:322 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - 00:18:597 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - оч странно, явно звуки гитары по 3, а комбо по 4 объекта
00:16:949 (1,2) - свап нк
00:20:575 (1,2,1,2,3,4) - тут 2 выделяющихся звука, на первой и второй (1), мне кажется то как замапано не отображает этого
00:29:641 (4) - как-то некрасиво смотрится и вразрез со стилем
00:39:861 (2,3) - мб сделать (3) чтоб под флоу от 2 было
00:42:333 (1,2,3,1) - зачем такое формирование если 1-2-3 - похожие звуки, вторая (1) - отличающийся
00:52:553 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - зачем первая 1-2 так сделана, таким образом теряется эмпхазис второй и третей 1-2
00:54:037 (2,1) - как-то не оч хорошо смотрится
01:03:432 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - третья пара 1-2 явно не такая же музыкально как первая и вторая
01:11:344 (1,3) - поч это так внезапно барабаны пропускаешь телами слайдеров? понятно что секция другая, но смены св достаточно что показать смену интенсити
01:14:311 (2,3,1,2) - стоит прислушаться внимательнее к этому моменту
01:15:300 (1,2) - приподнять узел на хвосте (2) чтобы параллельно с телом (1) было?
01:19:916 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1) - а не лучше ли начать с высокого спейса и закончить низким? типа звуки в первом комбо сильнее чем во втором
01:26:838 (1,2,1) - тут надо с джампами успокоиться имо, нет же ноток гитары
01:34:421 - клик сюда, начинать стрим с синего тика оч конфузно
mirash:
00:26:344 (2,4) - слишком близко
00:40:850 (4,4) - некрасиво как-то
00:42:333 (3,1) - свап нк. вообще в принципе непонятно почему тут 2 паттерна по 4 объекта 00:42:004 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - хотя с первой (3) вообще другая история начинается
00:47:608 (7,1) - свап нк?
00:54:531 (1,2,3,4) - странное формирование тбх
01:04:421 (1) - удалить нк?
hard:
00:16:454 (2,3) - 00:54:201 (1,2) - получше бланкет
01:31:784 - странно это место оставлять пустым, можно предыдущий слайдер сделать реверсом
collab normal:
01:28:982 (2) - лучше бы чтобы не касалось хпбара
01:30:465 (5,1,2) - может быть тяжело читать Если еще напишут, фиксану
easy:
00:20:245 (2,1) - как-то некрасиво они касаются, можно сделать полноценный оверлап, выглядело бы солиднее
00:59:146 (3,1,2) - что-то со спейсингом случилось
01:04:751 - мне кажется тут должен быть клик Должен, да тут изи вроде,а не инсейн и делать на красный тик слайдер тоже не оч
01:06:399 (1,3) - свап нк?
01:09:366 (5,1) - снова некрасиво касаются

no reply - agree
Спасибо большое!

[ White Music ] wrote:
Good Map !!

Thanks!!!

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2017-10-12T21:58:26+00:00

h4d0uk3n1 wrote:
прив, м4м
loreley:
00:02:443 - стоит выделить, тут же звук такой же как и 00:01:125 (4) - вся эта часть не делается кликабельной, чтобы создать эффект медленности, так как музыка довольно тихая, хоть и интенсивная
00:01:289 (5,1) - свап нк? Понимаю почему, но тут я попробовал ставить нк после даунбита. Впрочем, оба варианты возможны.
00:03:762 - тоже клик сюда бы (00:09:037 (3) - причем позже на похожем моменте клик) в первом случае не такой сильный звук, как во втором
00:13:322 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - 00:18:597 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - оч странно, явно звуки гитары по 3, а комбо по 4 объекта Потому что гитара сама по себе хаотична здесь. Но я делю объекты по 4 из-за клепов, да и так удобнее и читабельнее для игрока. Да и эмпхазис в любом случае нормальный для выделения гитары. Будет спейснут гитарный звук или наоборот - ощущения измнения в спейсинге достаточно, чтобы гитара почувствовалась
00:16:949 (1,2) - свап нк Я из чувства эстетики не хочу свапать их, да и по силе звуки равны, это как как компонент.
00:20:575 (1,2,1,2,3,4) - тут 2 выделяющихся звука, на первой и второй (1), мне кажется то как замапано не отображает этого Мало что там может казаться. Стрим начинается с более сильного звука, так интуитивнее для игрока.
00:29:641 (4) - как-то некрасиво смотрится и вразрез со стилем Да, вразрез со стилем.
00:39:861 (2,3) - мб сделать (3) чтоб под флоу от 2 было Меня устраивает такой флоу.
00:42:333 (1,2,3,1) - зачем такое формирование если 1-2-3 - похожие звуки, вторая (1) - отличающийся Просто ради симметрии, до этого ее не было, а тут появилась на соло гитаре.
00:52:553 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - зачем первая 1-2 так сделана, таким образом теряется эмпхазис второй и третей 1-2 Жертвую им ради разгона
00:54:037 (2,1) - как-то не оч хорошо смотрится Печально
01:03:432 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - третья пара 1-2 явно не такая же музыкально как первая и вторая поэтому она и меньше
01:11:344 (1,3) - поч это так внезапно барабаны пропускаешь телами слайдеров? понятно что секция другая, но смены св достаточно что показать смену интенсити для меня недостаточно лишь смены св
01:14:311 (2,3,1,2) - стоит прислушаться внимательнее к этому моменту я не хочу делать дабл, и кики там исключительно из-за слабости битов, по сравнению с битами в стриме
01:15:300 (1,2) - приподнять узел на хвосте (2) чтобы параллельно с телом (1) было? нарочно сделано не параллельно
01:19:916 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1) - а не лучше ли начать с высокого спейса и закончить низким? типа звуки в первом комбо сильнее чем во втором Тут просто дело вкуса. Приемлимы оба варианта, но я предпочитаю придать разгон концу.
01:26:838 (1,2,1) - тут надо с джампами успокоиться имо, нет же ноток гитары Гитара там есть, она в потоке. Рвать флоу ни к чему.
01:34:421 - клик сюда, начинать стрим с синего тика оч конфузно Верно

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40,245,80409,1,2,0:1:0:0:
80,197,80492,1,2,0:1:0:0:
142,195,80575,6,0,B|124:224|97:233|97:233|14:209|14:106,1,205.700006277466,6|2,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
231,54,81070,2,0,B|208:107|208:107|266:161|236:259,1,205.700006277466,8|2,0:0|0:1,0:0:0:0:
414,95,81564,2,0,P|328:81|353:164,1,205.700006277466,8|2,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
350,286,82059,6,0,B|438:341|438:341|440:221,1,205.700006277466,2|2,3:2|0:0,0:0:0:0:
239,231,82553,2,0,L|106:213,1,102.850003138733,8|2,0:0|0:1,0:0:0:0:
39,325,82883,2,0,L|140:338,1,102.850003138733,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
185,117,83212,6,0,B|152:104|143:74|143:74|135:248,1,205.700006277466,6|2,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
295,165,83707,1,10,0:0:0:0:
295,156,83789,1,0,0:0:0:0:
295,148,83871,1,0,0:0:0:0:
296,140,83954,1,0,0:0:0:0:
296,132,84036,1,2,0:1:0:0:
226,33,84201,5,8,0:0:0:0:
294,259,84366,1,2,0:1:0:0:
474,132,84531,5,2,0:3:0:0:
410,181,84696,2,0,P|410:85|502:58,1,205.700006277466,2|2,0:0|0:1,0:0:0:0:
407,212,85190,6,0,P|375:225|352:245,1,51.4250015693665,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
331,337,85355,2,0,P|299:325|276:305,1,51.4250015693665,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
262,212,85520,6,0,P|230:225|207:245,1,51.4250015693665,2|0,3:2|0:0,0:0:0:0:
160,305,85685,2,0,P|128:293|105:273,1,51.4250015693665,8|8,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
42,202,85850,5,6,0:0:0:0:
97,46,86015,1,8,0:1:0:0:
42,218,86179,5,2,0:1:0:0:
0,43,86344,1,2,0:0:0:0:
168,260,86509,5,4,0:3:0:0:
233,72,86674,1,2,0:0:0:0:
168,277,86838,5,12,0:0:0:0:
117,68,87003,1,2,0:1:0:0:
300,317,87168,5,8,0:1:0:0:
378,99,87333,1,2,0:1:0:0:
300,338,87497,5,8,0:1:0:0:
237,96,87662,1,8,0:0:0:0:
429,335,87828,5,8,0:1:0:0:
212,222,87993,1,2,0:0:0:0:
446,156,88157,5,12,0:0:0:0:
192,216,88322,1,8,0:1:0:0:
378,99,88487,6,0,B|354:147|354:147|366:212,1,102.850003138733,4|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
385,334,88817,1,8,0:1:0:0:
272,95,88982,6,0,P|279:147|260:208,1,102.850003138733,8|2,0:1|0:3,0:0:0:0:
188,317,89311,1,2,0:1:0:0:
162,110,89476,1,8,0:0:0:0:
103,254,89641,2,0,L|0:238,1,102.850003138733,8|2,0:1|0:1,0:0:0:0:
91,54,89971,6,0,B|74:102|74:102|88:152,1,102.850003138733,8|8,0:0|0:1,0:0:0:0:
260,235,90300,1,2,0:1:0:0:
265,68,90465,1,8,0:1:0:0:
172,180,90630,1,8,0:0:0:0:
366,186,90795,6,0,P|365:149|374:126,1,51.4250015693665,2|2,3:2|0:1,0:0:0:0:
382,107,90960,2,0,P|382:70|374:47,1,51.4250015693665,2|2,3:2|0:1,0:0:0:0:
378,34,91124,5,6,0:0:0:0:
464,166,91289,1,8,0:1:0:0:
373,19,91454,5,2,0:1:0:0:
423,256,91619,1,8,0:1:0:0:
423,256,91701,1,0,0:0:0:0:
423,256,91784,2,0,B|400:246|400:246|317:248,1,102.850003138733,8|8,0:1|0:0,0:0:0:0:
169,150,92114,1,4,0:3:0:0:
207,335,92278,2,0,P|235:293|216:242,1,102.850003138733,2|8,0:1|0:1,0:0:0:0:
104,116,92608,6,0,P|89:163|117:204,1,102.850003138733,8|4,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
299,129,92938,1,8,0:1:0:0:
128,230,93103,1,8,0:0:0:0:
214,59,93267,1,8,0:0:0:0:
309,229,93432,2,0,L|378:211,1,51.4250015693665,2|0,3:2|0:0,0:0:0:0:
439,194,93597,1,8,0:0:0:0:
383,76,93762,5,6,0:0:0:0:
411,311,93927,1,2,0:0:0:0:
383,76,94092,1,2,3:2:0:0:
270,246,94256,2,0,L|186:234,1,51.4250015693665,14|8,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
133,306,94421,1,8,0:0:0:0:
133,306,94504,1,8,0:0:0:0:
133,306,94586,1,10,0:0:0:0:
133,306,94668,1,8,0:0:0:0:
133,306,94751,6,0,P|163:315|192:313,1,51.4250015693665,14|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
212,156,94916,2,0,P|181:145|152:148,1,51.4250015693665,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:

Ellyu

429 posts

Joined May 2014

Ellyu 2017-10-14T15:56:27+00:00

[cool top diff]
00:13:322 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - should be splited into 2 groups instead of 3. cuz there are 2 heavy sound on 00:13:322 - and 00:13:817 -
00:18:597 (1,2,1,2,1) - same as^
00:21:234 (1,2) - the only 1/4 pattern in this portion and it doesn't fit the music too. a 1/1 slider here is enough
00:48:597 (2,3,4) - you should know that the white tick triplet is weird to play
01:05:740 (1,2) - space too closed
01:10:026 (1,2) - space too closed too. and 1 is very easy to be misread as a 3/4

[loreley]
00:13:322 (1,2,3,4,1,2,) - should be splited into 1,2,3,1,2,3 cuz there are 2 heavy sound on 00:13:322 - and 00:13:817 -
00:18:597 (1,2,3,4,1,2) - same as^
00:27:004 (4,5) - could be blanket
00:44:971 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - kinda overmapped. this portion is calm.

[mirash]
00:13:652 (4,5,6,7) - plays fine. but visually bad cuz the space isn't equaled
00:30:300 (6,1) - the only 1/4 pattern in this portion and it doesn't fit the music too. a 1/1 slider here is enough
00:46:289 (3) - 00:46:949 (5) - 2007 ver. editor
01:04:586 (2,3) - add a jump to emphasize the downbeat plz

lower diff is fine.

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2017-10-14T16:42:31+00:00

Ellyu wrote:
[loreley]
00:13:322 (1,2,3,4,1,2,) - should be splited into 1,2,3,1,2,3 cuz there are 2 heavy sound on 00:13:322 - and 00:13:817 - guitar for me like claps 4|4
00:18:597 (1,2,3,4,1,2) - same as^ ^
00:27:004 (4,5) - could be blanket I want such slidershape
00:44:971 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - kinda overmapped. this portion is calm. strong claps and 00:45:136 (2) - reverse for vocal

- AzRaeL -

363 posts

Joined April 2017

- AzRaeL - 2017-10-24T13:02:00+00:00

NM from here.

Easy
00:08:048 (3) - NC as 00:02:773 (1).
00:15:300 (2) - Making slider start at 00:15:300 sounds smooth imo, and you can add a circle at 00:14:971 or use kick slider.
00:20:245 (2) - Making slider start at 00:20:575 sounds smooth imo.
00:59:146 (3) - looks like a circle inserted forcibly and having bad flow.
01:03:432 (1) - Not necessary NC I think.
01:25:850 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - I think these are too difficult for easy. Suggest to make it easier, your call.
01:33:762 (1,2) - How about changing it into a kick slider?

Normal
There are too many beats for Normal I think in general.
00:14:971 (4) - NC?
00:21:894 - I don't know why put a beat on here.
00:29:146 (1,2,3) - How about this.

Picture 1

00:33:762 (3) - Suggest to delete.
00:35:575 (3,4) - How about this.

Picture 2

00:47:608 (4,1) - NC on (4)?
01:08:707 (1) - Remove NC I think.
01:15:465 (1) - Make spinner start on red line for some recovery time.
01:31:949 (1) - Unnecessary NC I think.

Hard
00:11:179 (2) - Making it to x:176 y:174 for parallelogram and better flow becuz it and (1),(3) form a straight bad-flow line.
00:35:657 (2,3,4) - These are unnecessary beats I think (contrast previous beats).
00:42:828 (2,1) - Avoid this overlap.
00:54:201 (1,2) - Fix blanket.
01:15:300 (5) - I preferred to NC.
01:07:059 (3) - x:300 y:356 looks better.

Nice map to ranked, GL

.

Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2017-10-25T08:39:08+00:00

- AzRaeL - wrote:
NM from here.

Easy
00:08:048 (3) - NC as 00:02:773 (1).
00:15:300 (2) - Making slider start at 00:15:300 sounds smooth imo, and you can add a circle at 00:14:971 or use kick slider. i think its fine
00:20:245 (2) - Making slider start at 00:20:575 sounds smooth imo. its easy bro
00:59:146 (3) - looks like a circle inserted forcibly and having bad flow. i think its fine
01:03:432 (1) - Not necessary NC I think.
01:25:850 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - I think these are too difficult for easy. Suggest to make it easier, your call. delis say its ok
01:33:762 (1,2) - How about changing it into a kick slider? think no

Normal
There are too many beats for Normal I think in general.
00:14:971 (4) - NC?
00:21:894 - I don't know why put a beat on here.
00:29:146 (1,2,3) - How about this.
Picture 1
00:33:762 (3) - Suggest to delete.
00:35:575 (3,4) - How about this.
Picture 2

00:47:608 (4,1) - NC on (4)? -
01:08:707 (1) - Remove NC I think.
01:15:465 (1) - Make spinner start on red line for some recovery time. -
01:31:949 (1) - Unnecessary NC I think. -

Hard
00:11:179 (2) - Making it to x:176 y:174 for parallelogram and better flow becuz it and (1),(3) form a straight bad-flow line. -
00:35:657 (2,3,4) - These are unnecessary beats I think (contrast previous beats). -
00:42:828 (2,1) - Avoid this overlap. -
00:54:201 (1,2) - Fix blanket.
01:15:300 (5) - I preferred to NC.
01:07:059 (3) - x:300 y:356 looks better. -

Nice map to ranked, GL .

thank you!

Ellyu wrote:
[cool top diff]
00:13:322 (1,2,1,2,1,2) - should be splited into 2 groups instead of 3. cuz there are 2 heavy sound on 00:13:322 - and 00:13:817 - i think it ok, bcz 00:13:322 (1,1,1) - i follow this beats, and i cand make 3 00:13:982 (1,1) - bcz this a gutar beats too.
00:18:597 (1,2,1,2,1) - same as^
00:21:234 (1,2) - the only 1/4 pattern in this portion and it doesn't fit the music too. a 1/1 slider here is enough but vocal beats so strong like this 01:01:619 (1,2) -
00:48:597 (2,3,4) - you should know that the white tick triplet is weird to play and? many people do this
01:05:740 (1,2) - space too closed but looks good
01:10:026 (1,2) - space too closed too. and 1 is very easy to be misread as a 3/4 ^

.

thank u

Djulus

570 posts

Joined September 2014

Djulus 2017-10-28T12:30:19+00:00

изик
00:23:542 (2,1) - https://puu.sh/y97l7/b122fc3197.png трайни эту, более проходимое для новичков
00:28:817 (3,1) - саме
00:41:509 - https://puu.sh/y97wr/2c3ac97398.png такой слайдер больше подходит как по мне
00:50:245 (4) - странно выглядит, прямой слайдер лучше подходит
00:58:487 (2) - лучше укоротить слайдер до 00:59:146 - .
01:31:949 (2) - по моему лучше убрать это т.к эта диффа будет похожей на нормал а вообще я не думаю 01:31:949 (2,3) - использовать так в изи диффе.
01:33:762 (1,2,3) - https://puu.sh/y97Il/6b8bb16429.png
01:19:504 - по моему спиннер должен заканчиваться здесь
нормал
в описании нет, кто где мапнул.
01:30:465 (5,1,2) - слишком тяжело читать.
хард
00:00:630 (2,3) - без причин увеличен спейсинг :thinking:
00:03:432 (3,4) - same
00:19:092 (2,3) -
01:15:383 (1) - та же с изиком
мираш
00:19:751 (8) - нк?
00:37:059 (4) - вокал повышается а спейсинг не изменяется :/
00:42:333 (3,4) - https://puu.sh/y988K/5e5a8cff66.png может сделать так? 01:04:421 (1,2) - вроде бы ты сделал похожее
лолерей
00:13:817 (4) - вроде новый джамп должен начинаться здесь и ты ее проигнорил
00:14:477 (4) - саме
00:19:092 (4) -
00:19:752 (4) -
01:05:410 (3) - ctrl+g cuz новый звук
фаллс инто зе ску
все ок

Shmiklak

Elite Storyboarder

3,218 posts

Joined January 2015

Shmiklak 2017-10-28T17:24:39+00:00

Red = Not allowed/potentionaly causing DQ
Bold = Mostly important, partially subjective, address this properly
Regular = Subjective opinion, try it out but don't obey my opinion if yours is essentially different

[ласт диффа]

00:53:872 (1) - тут нк забыл
00:04:915 (3) - 00:20:922 (1) - 00:21:004 (2) - 00:21:169 (4) - не снапнуто
01:34:256 (3) - поровнее линию плс

Adol Christin

875 posts

Joined October 2012

Adol Christin 2017-10-29T12:33:21+00:00

i always like Minakami Yuki.jpg

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2017-10-29T18:49:55+00:00

Djulus wrote:
изик
00:13:817 (4) - вроде новый джамп должен начинаться здесь и ты ее проигнорил
00:14:477 (4) - саме
00:19:092 (4) -
00:19:752 (4) -
01:05:410 (3) - ctrl+g cuz новый звук

Если там стоит нота, то как я могу его игнорить? Если ты имеешь в виду нк, то ответ в предыдущем моде.

В последнем моменте меня устраивает флоу, он вполне себе отражает этот "новый звук."

Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2017-11-05T12:06:57+00:00

Djulus wrote:
изик
00:23:542 (2,1) - https://puu.sh/y97l7/b122fc3197.png трайни эту, более проходимое для новичков я разницы вообще не вижу...
00:28:817 (3,1) - саме ^
00:41:509 - https://puu.sh/y97wr/2c3ac97398.png такой слайдер больше подходит как по мне
00:50:245 (4) - странно выглядит, прямой слайдер лучше подходит ^
00:58:487 (2) - лучше укоротить слайдер до 00:59:146 - . зачем?
01:31:949 (2) - по моему лучше убрать это т.к эта диффа будет похожей на нормал а вообще я не думаю 01:31:949 (2,3) - использовать так в изи диффе.
01:33:762 (1,2,3) - https://puu.sh/y97Il/6b8bb16429.png
01:19:504 - по моему спиннер должен заканчиваться здесь Фоловлю гитару
нормал
в описании нет, кто где мапнул.
01:30:465 (5,1,2) - слишком тяжело читать.
хард
00:00:630 (2,3) - без причин увеличен спейсинг :thinking: Гитара
00:03:432 (3,4) - same Гитара
00:19:092 (2,3) - Гитара
01:15:383 (1) - та же с изиком
мираш
00:19:751 (8) - нк?
00:37:059 (4) - вокал повышается а спейсинг не изменяется :/
00:42:333 (3,4) - https://puu.sh/y988K/5e5a8cff66.png может сделать так? 01:04:421 (1,2) - вроде бы ты сделал похожее
лолерей
00:13:817 (4) - вроде новый джамп должен начинаться здесь и ты ее проигнорил
00:14:477 (4) - саме
00:19:092 (4) -
00:19:752 (4) -
01:05:410 (3) - ctrl+g cuz новый звук
фаллс инто зе ску
все ок

M a r v o l l o wrote:
Red = Not allowed/potentionaly causing DQ
Bold = Mostly important, partially subjective, address this properly
Regular = Subjective opinion, try it out but don't obey my opinion if yours is essentially different

[ласт диффа]
00:53:872 (1) - тут нк забыл
00:04:915 (3) - 00:20:922 (1) - 00:21:004 (2) - 00:21:169 (4) - не снапнуто
01:34:256 (3) - поровнее линию плс

fixed all ^

Спасибо <3

EijiKuinbii

331 posts

Joined April 2015

EijiKuinbii 2017-11-21T19:28:18+00:00

toybot's Insane

nice diff, but
01:23:212 (1,1) - this sliders are ugly
01:25:850 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3) - I think triangular patterns would have gone better

Mirash

Beatmap Nominator

705 posts

Joined June 2013

Mirash 2017-11-22T11:51:25+00:00

@h4d0uk3n1 звуки соединены в том патерне, а нк я ставлю под вокал или патерны
@Ellyu that is how i want stuff to be, and not everything should be emphasized
@Djulus и без повышения спейсинга хорошо, а тот патерн я хочу оставить, он мне нравится

added some ncs, thanks!

Falls into the sky
00:11:344 (1,2,3) - я бы их местами поменял, так на следующую (1) будет антиджампик, круче играется как по мне https://i.imgur.com/qxs9PsI.jpg сейчас у тебя какие-то одинаковые джампы туда сюда и твой больший спейсинг на даунбит просто не чувствуется
00:13:322 (1) - это нк..

Loreley's Extra
00:25:685 (3,4,5) - там в музыке антиклимакс, у тебя прыжки стоят
вообще оверол в лоу пейсед секциях как-то прыжково все, не чувствуется разница с остальными партами
00:48:597 (4,5) - продолжил бы те движения слайдеров, ктрл г
00:56:509 (5) - почему он не как предыдущие два, выглядит аут оф плейс, алсо фов на предыдущих двух спокойный, а на этот прыжок, хотя по идее они должны вместе стоять. я бы предложил треугольником их поставить, одним шейпом, но можно и проще https://i.imgur.com/EXCdxNH.png

toybot's Insane
00:15:960 (1) - uh this one felt really out, because of skipping red tick 00:15:960 (1) - i got 100 >< try mapping it

Hard
зачем тут слайдертик 2? звучит очень странно, ставь 1
00:23:872 (1) - тут должен быть вистл
00:47:608 (1) - я думаю тут этот прыжок ну вообще не к месту, поставь под спейсинг, 00:48:103 (2) - тут все ок будет, можешь не двигать

Collab Normal
00:33:762 (3) - ее точно нужно мапать? без нее лучше имо

Last edited by Mirash 2017-11-22T12:35:16+00:00, edited 1 time in total.

NeilPerry

301 posts

Joined May 2011

NeilPerry 2017-11-22T12:29:20+00:00

discussed with lama some spacing issuses in top diff. also fixed some broken stacks

IRC log on russian

18:44 *NeilPerry is editing [https://osu.ppy.sh/b/1424610 Hana - Kuukirikigaku Shoujo to Shounen no Uta [Falls into the sky]]
18:44 Lama Poluna: o3o
18:44 NeilPerry: 00:00:795 (3,4,5) -
18:44 NeilPerry: 00:01:784 (2,1,2) -
18:44 NeilPerry: не вижу разницы в спейсинге
18:44 NeilPerry: парт одинаковый а спейсинг разный
18:44 Lama Poluna: ты чо наци?
18:45 Lama Poluna: кака разница?
18:45 NeilPerry: ну там прям пиздец не читабельно получается
18:45 NeilPerry: http://puu.sh/yrgsj/de865bac10.jpg
18:45 Lama Poluna: это начало карто
18:45 NeilPerry: я предлагаю тебе мануально стакнуть вторую
18:45 Lama Poluna: можно и рестарнуть
18:45 NeilPerry: где
18:45 NeilPerry: 1\2 ритм
18:45 NeilPerry: там энивей стак поехал немного
18:46 Lama Poluna: мануально стакнуть?
18:46 NeilPerry: ну в ручную
18:46 NeilPerry: не стакать по ланиенси
18:46 NeilPerry: а тупо в ручную сделать как у меня на скрине
18:46 Lama Poluna: 00:06:070 (3) -
18:46 Lama Poluna: тогда и тут спейсинг говно
18:46 NeilPerry: 00:41:509 (1,2) - еще вот это не ок работает когда я тестплеил
18:46 NeilPerry: тут найс
18:47 NeilPerry: потому что 1\4
18:47 NeilPerry: 00:01:784 (2,1,2) - а тут 1\2
18:47 NeilPerry: ноты после слайдера
18:47 Lama Poluna: если ансткну
18:47 Lama Poluna: начало
18:47 Lama Poluna: то будешь лучше?
18:47 NeilPerry: поэтому надо как-то выделить чуток
18:47 Lama Poluna: лол
18:47 Lama Poluna: не
18:47 Lama Poluna: ну про первое
18:47 Lama Poluna: ты серьезно?
18:47 Lama Poluna: я не знаю как лучше
18:47 Lama Poluna: но если ты говоришь
18:47 Lama Poluna: то я анстакну
18:48 NeilPerry: лучше вообще в приты сделай
18:48 NeilPerry: в притык
18:48 NeilPerry: ток 1\4 не трогай
18:48 Lama Poluna: но так и есть
18:48 NeilPerry: они крутые у тебя
18:48 Lama Poluna: в притык
18:48 Lama Poluna: ну
18:48 Lama Poluna: ща пуш
18:48 Lama Poluna: вейт
18:49 NeilPerry: http://puu.sh/yrgxN/9daef70ffb.jpg
18:49 NeilPerry: включи стакинг в эдиторе
18:49 NeilPerry: если оффнут
18:49 Lama Poluna: https://puu.sh/yrgyb.png
18:49 NeilPerry: у меня просто стакинг поехал у тебя
18:49 Lama Poluna: так?
18:49 NeilPerry: да
18:49 NeilPerry: можно еще ближе
18:49 Lama Poluna: спейсинг говно?
18:49 Lama Poluna: CTRL+G
18:50 NeilPerry: не
18:50 Lama Poluna: ща ремапну
18:50 Lama Poluna: короч
18:50 NeilPerry: ща
18:50 NeilPerry: еще один саджешин
18:50 NeilPerry: 00:41:509 (1,2) -
18:50 NeilPerry: вот это не ок работает
18:51 NeilPerry: https://puu.sh/yrgAK/39bb83faf0.jpg
18:51 NeilPerry: попробуй что нибудь такое
18:51 Lama Poluna: https://puu.sh/yrgBD.png
18:51 Lama Poluna: я тебе еще
18:51 Lama Poluna: про начало
18:51 Lama Poluna: не беги
18:51 NeilPerry: да
18:51 NeilPerry: тож нормас
18:51 Lama Poluna: норм?
18:51 NeilPerry: ага
18:52 Lama Poluna: так
18:52 Lama Poluna: что 2
18:53 Lama Poluna: 00:41:509 (1,2) -
18:53 NeilPerry: 00:41:509 (1,2) -
18:53 NeilPerry: https://puu.sh/yrgAK/39bb83faf0.jpg
18:53 Lama Poluna: это00:41:674 -
18:53 Lama Poluna: может тут ноту добавить?
18:53 NeilPerry: так лучше работать будет
18:53 NeilPerry: и музло чувствоваться куруче будет
18:53 NeilPerry: не
18:54 Lama Poluna: ок
18:54 Lama Poluna: фикс
18:54 Lama Poluna: 00:48:597 (2,3,4) -
18:54 Lama Poluna: мне писали про это
18:54 Lama Poluna: какую то фигню
18:54 Lama Poluna: так и не понял
18:54 Lama Poluna: с ним все норм?
18:55 NeilPerry: мне норм
18:55 Lama Poluna: 01:05:740 (1,2) -
18:55 Lama Poluna: скажали слишком близко
18:55 NeilPerry: триплы тоже посе 1\4 слайдерэндов мне норм
18:55 Lama Poluna: правда?
18:55 NeilPerry: которые никитин говорил
18:55 Lama Poluna: ну смотри
18:55 Lama Poluna: про триплы
18:55 Lama Poluna: там чистый звук на слайдере
18:55 Lama Poluna: а потом ну реально 3 ноты
18:55 NeilPerry: не правда там норм спейсинг
18:55 Lama Poluna: ну я их слайдером могу мапнуить
18:56 NeilPerry: у тебя спейсинг на битах строится
18:56 NeilPerry: ты выделяешь сильные биты спейсингом
18:56 NeilPerry: а не вокал
18:56 Lama Poluna: да
18:56 NeilPerry: так что исходя из концепции карты
18:56 NeilPerry: спейсинг там логичен
18:56 NeilPerry: и ое
18:56 NeilPerry: 01:05:740 (1,2) -
18:56 Lama Poluna: 01:09:366 (1,2,1,2,1) -
18:56 Lama Poluna: писали
18:56 Lama Poluna: под что это
18:57 Lama Poluna: я могу же так мапнуть?
18:57 Lama Poluna: там не сильные биты, но музыка так переходит
18:57 Lama Poluna: с слабую
18:57 Lama Poluna: да и фолоу там норм вроде
18:58 NeilPerry: да нормас вроде
18:59 Lama Poluna: 01:31:619 (2,1) -
18:59 Lama Poluna: мне кажется жестко слишком?
18:59 Lama Poluna: легко же тут мисануть?
18:59 Lama Poluna: или норм?
18:59 NeilPerry: 01:31:784 (1) -
18:59 NeilPerry: вот это немного не понимаю
18:59 Lama Poluna: 101:31:124 (1,1,1) -
18:59 NeilPerry: там звук другой не много
18:59 Lama Poluna: тип линия
19:00 Lama Poluna: вообще чет парт говно
19:00 Lama Poluna: 01:31:949 (2) -
19:00 Lama Poluna: говно
19:00 NeilPerry: сделай тогда чтобы расстояние одинаковое было 01:31:125 (1,1,1) -
19:01 NeilPerry: мне тож не оч нравится как геометрически оно выглядит 01:31:619 (2,1,2) -
19:02 Lama Poluna: бля
19:03 Lama Poluna: продикнутый мне биты
19:03 Lama Poluna: которые
19:03 Lama Poluna: на страшном слайдере стояли
19:03 Lama Poluna: ну хистаунды
19:13 NeilPerry: эм
19:13 NeilPerry: я в душе был
19:13 Lama Poluna: да все
19:13 Lama Poluna: я ремапаю уже
19:13 Lama Poluna: писос
19:15 NeilPerry: хых
19:15 NeilPerry: гл

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2017-11-22T17:17:17+00:00

@mirash
все пофиксил
@lama poluna
чекни хсы

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TitleUnicode:空気力学少女と少年の詩
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Source:素晴らしき日々～不連続存在～
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Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2017-11-27T14:07:17+00:00

Mirash wrote:
@h4d0uk3n1 звуки соединены в том патерне, а нк я ставлю под вокал или патерны
@Ellyu that is how i want stuff to be, and not everything should be emphasized
@Djulus и без повышения спейсинга хорошо, а тот патерн я хочу оставить, он мне нравится

added some ncs, thanks!

Falls into the sky
00:11:344 (1,2,3) - я бы их местами поменял, так на следующую (1) будет антиджампик, круче играется как по мне https://i.imgur.com/qxs9PsI.jpg сейчас у тебя какие-то одинаковые джампы туда сюда и твой больший спейсинг на даунбит просто не чувствуется Я фулл мапу фоловлю биты, не хочу менять концепцию
00:13:322 (1) - это нк.. ?

Loreley's Extra
00:25:685 (3,4,5) - там в музыке антиклимакс, у тебя прыжки стоят
вообще оверол в лоу пейсед секциях как-то прыжково все, не чувствуется разница с остальными партами
00:48:597 (4,5) - продолжил бы те движения слайдеров, ктрл г
00:56:509 (5) - почему он не как предыдущие два, выглядит аут оф плейс, алсо фов на предыдущих двух спокойный, а на этот прыжок, хотя по идее они должны вместе стоять. я бы предложил треугольником их поставить, одним шейпом, но можно и проще https://i.imgur.com/EXCdxNH.png

toybot's Insane
00:15:960 (1) - uh this one felt really out, because of skipping red tick 00:15:960 (1) - i got 100 >< try mapping it

Hard
зачем тут слайдертик 2? звучит очень странно, ставь 1
00:23:872 (1) - тут должен быть вистл
00:47:608 (1) - я думаю тут этот прыжок ну вообще не к месту, поставь под спейсинг, 00:48:103 (2) - тут все ок будет, можешь не двигать вообще не понял(

Collab Normal
00:33:762 (3) - ее точно нужно мапать? без нее лучше имо

Spasibo!

toybot

1,050 posts

Joined June 2013

toybot 2017-12-03T05:45:14+00:00

@eijikuinbii i like my squares tho

https://0paste.com/19147.txt

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2017-12-07T15:15:17+00:00

Please update so that I could check this map

I fc'ed the top two diffs all at the first try!

Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2017-12-07T17:11:43+00:00

Regraz wrote:
Please update so that I could check this map

I fc'ed the top two diffs all at the first try!

done!

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2017-12-08T02:10:30+00:00

[General*]
Better to make Kiai consistent across all diffs.

[Easy]
Would you like to silence the slider-slide, it sounds really annoying.
00:20:245 (2,1) - This really looks messed up. Try some blankets.
00:32:114 (2,3) - 00:21:564 (1) - 00:34:751 (2,3) - 00:23:872 (1,2) - I think you need to keep these rhythms consistent. They are similar as to rhythms. Tbh, I don't think it is okay to apply 1/2s in Easy under such a BPM.
00:45:630 Add a note here so that it wont play too empty.
00:49:256 (3,4) - Not a good overlap. In fact I am not recommending such overlap either.
01:09:366 (3,1) - Make them paralleled.
Rhythm across this diff is too random in my opinion. I strongly recommend to go over it. To be honest, you don't need that many fancy variations on rhythm. Easy should be straight-forward so Just 1/1 and 2/1 rhythms are enough.

[Collab Normal]
00:12:993 (2,1) - Off-blanket'ed
00:21:234 (1,2) - This placement will easily confuse new players about the direction of slider 2.
00:26:344 (1,2,3,1,2,3) - They are too crowded. Try to spread out them.
00:29:146 (1) - I guess rhythm should be: https://puu.sh/yBHaE/5dcc577067.png as to vocals.
00:31:784 (1) - Too sharp.
00:34:421 (1,2,3) - Flow is pretty twisted here, try to smooth out them.
00:37:059 (1) - This long reverse slider sounds pretty abrupt. As it ends on a strong clap and enormously reduced the rhythm density here.
00:44:641 (3,4) - This kind of overlap of sliders are not appropriate in Normal. 00:45:960 (5,1) - Same here.
00:58:157 (5) - 00:59:476 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - Imbalanced rhythm density.
01:03:432 (3,4,5,6,1,2,3,4,5) - A long set of 1/2 gaps with no 1/1 gaps for rest.
01:27:168 (1,2,3,1,2,3,4,5) - ^
01:31:949 (1,2,1,2,3,1,2,3,4) - Super hard rhythms, it is even not overdosed to call it Hard.
Rhythm and placement of course need polishments.

[Hard]
You've placed quite a few jumps in the first half of the diff while there could hardly be jumps in the rest half, even in Kiai. I'd strongly advise to fix this inconsistency.
00:12:663 (3,1) - Not wise to cover reverse arrows.
00:35:410 (1,2,3,4) - The slider-end triplets as well as 1/4 reverse slider is amongst the most intense rhythms you've placed in this diff. I wonder if it really deserves such intense rhythms. This part is quite soft and calm.
01:14:641 (3,4) - Thought there are too many such sliders. Maybe swap them for 1/2 sliders and circles.

[Mirash's Insane]
SV is quite fast yet spacing is quite low overall (1/2s are mostly in normal spacing with sudden huge jumps).
This is the main problem of this difficulty.

[toybot's Insane]
00:46:289 (1) - It makes me want to put this further for emphasis on cymbal.
01:10:023 - I did not get the idea of this spacing decrease. It might need to grow to be larger instead according to the music.
01:14:641 (1,2,1,2) - Should be in consistent (visual) spacing imo.

[Loreley's Extra]
01:12:993 (2) - I'd recommend to emphasize the slider-end out.
01:23:707 (2,3,4,5,6) - Too weak for a five-note stream.
01:32:114 (5,1) - Meh blanket

[Top diff]
00:22:883 (3,1) - Put it further to prevent it from being read as 1/2, like this: 00:24:861 (3,1) -

Top diffs are finr, my biggest concerns fall onto the lower ones. You need to find more help or mod for them. Maybe you could poke me back when you think you're ready.

Last edited by Mafumafu 2018-01-11T01:52:21+00:00, edited 1 time in total.

riptiondesc

29 posts

Joined July 2017

riptiondesc 2017-12-17T07:11:30+00:00

Free mod from a noob modder since osu! needs more Hana and this song rocks

Hard

00:43:652 (1,2,3) - i don't recommend this rhythm for Hard players, would suggest making 2 a repeat slider

nice Hard

mirash
00:45:960 (1,2,3) - maybe intentional but I think this breaks your structure for this section comparing to 00:44:311 (1,2,3,4) -

01:21:564 (1) - are you trying to blanket this

idk how to mod this diff

toybot

as mirash pointed out you should probably map this, you used a 1/2 slider at 00:00:136 (1) - and 00:05:410 (1) - before drums kick in

00:25:685 (7,8) - first time playing this confused me, I'd suggest not mapping this

love what you've done with the middle section especially 00:37:059 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9) - and 00:42:333 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,1) -

01:03:762 (2,3,4) - doubles on sliderends rhythmically make me wanna die

01:17:938 (1,2,3,4,1,2,1,2,3,4) - personally can't read this but i think i'm just bad

01:34:751 (1,2) - i hated this antijump at first but it works, what mirash did but more spaced might be a good alternative

I can't mod extra but I'll probably mod the lower diffs later

full version when, take my star

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2018-01-11T23:48:13+00:00

all fixed
Лама, скопируй хсы на мою диффу >.>

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 53542
Countdown: 0
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.2
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 0

[Editor]
DistanceSpacing: 1.8
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 32
TimelineZoom: 2.2

[Metadata]
Title:Kuukirikigaku Shoujo to Shounen no Uta
TitleUnicode:空気力学少女と少年の詩
Artist:Hana
ArtistUnicode:はな
Creator:Lama Poluna
Version:Loreley's Extra
Source:素晴らしき日々～不連続存在～
Tags:すかぢ szak SCA-ji Subarashiki Hibi ~Furenzoku Sonzai~ KeroQ うさ Utaite Usa Wonderful Everyday Discontinuous Existence Diskontinuierliches Dasein Fuminori Matsumoto 松本文紀 metrowing SubaHibi visual novel vn Loreley toybot Mirash Byby KittyAdventure
BeatmapID:1431394
BeatmapSetID:673099

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:5
CircleSize:4.1
OverallDifficulty:8.8
ApproachRate:9.2
SliderMultiplier:1.87
SliderTickRate:1

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Mirash

Beatmap Nominator

705 posts

Joined June 2013

Mirash 2018-01-12T12:35:23+00:00

@Regraz lowered sv a bit (by 0,2)
@riptiondesc both things are intentional, yeah

https://pastebin.com/JgEMYf0t

PandaHero's Normal
00:13:322 - тут репит бы лучше зашел, под мелодию
00:39:696 (1,2) - лучше эвоидить такой плейсмент, новички могут на двоечку нажать первее, а не на еденичку, так как вести до нее ближе, у тебя там пауза скоро, думаю сможешь что-то придумать без особых заморочек с дсом

PandaHero

662 posts

Joined November 2011

PandaHero 2018-01-12T14:35:27+00:00

@Mirash всё поправила, спасибо

Djulus wrote:
no kudosu
pandahero's normal
00:14:311 (2,3) - мэйби сделать как на этот 00:11:674 (3,4,5) - ? вроде один же звук+эмфхазис.
для меня по-разному звучат
00:42:333 (7) - нк т.к ты делала каждые 2 бита нк 00:42:333 (1,2) - может свап нк лучше подходила бы 00:44:806 (3) - и тут нк.
Нет, в первом случае не хочу спамить нк, во втором я под вокал их ставлю
00:51:234 (1,2,3,4) - тут как каша сделана но вот если 00:52:223 (3,4) - подвинуть вниз то лучше выглядит (чтобы игроку легче было проходить) uwu.
Сделала
01:22:223 (3) - я думаю здесь эта лишняя нота консистенси WiTH 01:20:575 (1) - 01:23:212 (1,2) -
Лол, зачем я её поставила вообще, убрала

тык

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Title:Kuukirikigaku Shoujo to Shounen no Uta
TitleUnicode:空気力学少女と少年の詩
Artist:Hana
ArtistUnicode:はな
Creator:Lama Poluna
Version:PandaHero's Normal
Source:素晴らしき日々～不連続存在～
Tags:すかぢ szak SCA-ji Subarashiki Hibi ~Furenzoku Sonzai~ KeroQ うさ Utaite Usa Wonderful Everyday Discontinuous Existence Diskontinuierliches Dasein Fuminori Matsumoto 松本文紀 metrowing SubaHibi visual novel vn Loreley toybot Mirash Byby PandaHero sherrycherry allihoppa
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Last edited by PandaHero 2018-01-12T15:08:13+00:00, edited 1 time in total.

Djulus

570 posts

Joined September 2014

Djulus 2018-01-12T14:51:49+00:00

no kudosu
pandahero's normal
00:14:311 (2,3) - мэйби сделать как на этот 00:11:674 (3,4,5) - ? вроде один же звук+эмфхазис.
00:42:333 (7) - нк т.к ты делала каждые 2 бита нк 00:42:333 (1,2) - может свап нк лучше подходила бы 00:44:806 (3) - и тут нк.
00:51:234 (1,2,3,4) - тут как каша сделана но вот если 00:52:223 (3,4) - подвинуть вниз то лучше выглядит (чтобы игроку легче было проходить) uwu.
01:22:223 (3) - я думаю здесь эта лишняя нота консистенси WiTH 01:20:575 (1) - 01:23:212 (1,2) -

Kyouren

5,582 posts

Joined October 2012

Kyouren 2018-01-31T13:39:48+00:00

Lama, can you add my old nickname? gokugohan12468
Thank you :3

Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2018-03-08T09:49:44+00:00

Regraz wrote:
[General*]
Better to make Kiai consistent across all diffs.

[Easy]
Would you like to silence the slider-slide, it sounds really annoying.
00:20:245 (2,1) - This really looks messed up. Try some blankets. fix
00:32:114 (2,3) - 00:21:564 (1) - 00:34:751 (2,3) - 00:23:872 (1,2) - I think you need to keep these rhythms consistent. They are similar as to rhythms. Tbh, I don't think it is okay to apply 1/2s in Easy under such a BPM. fix
00:45:630 Add a note here so that it wont play too empty. fix
00:49:256 (3,4) - Not a good overlap. In fact I am not recommending such overlap either. fix
01:09:366 (3,1) - Make them paralleled. fix
Rhythm across this diff is too random in my opinion. I strongly recommend to go over it. To be honest, you don't need that many fancy variations on rhythm. Easy should be straight-forward so Just 1/1 and 2/1 rhythms are enough.

[Collab Normal]
00:12:993 (2,1) - Off-blanket'ed
00:21:234 (1,2) - This placement will easily confuse new players about the direction of slider 2.
00:26:344 (1,2,3,1,2,3) - They are too crowded. Try to spread out them.
00:29:146 (1) - I guess rhythm should be: https://puu.sh/yBHaE/5dcc577067.png as to vocals.
00:31:784 (1) - Too sharp.
00:34:421 (1,2,3) - Flow is pretty twisted here, try to smooth out them.
00:37:059 (1) - This long reverse slider sounds pretty abrupt. As it ends on a strong clap and enormously reduced the rhythm density here.
00:44:641 (3,4) - This kind of overlap of sliders are not appropriate in Normal. 00:45:960 (5,1) - Same here.
00:58:157 (5) - 00:59:476 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - Imbalanced rhythm density.
01:03:432 (3,4,5,6,1,2,3,4,5) - A long set of 1/2 gaps with no 1/1 gaps for rest.
01:27:168 (1,2,3,1,2,3,4,5) - ^
01:31:949 (1,2,1,2,3,1,2,3,4) - Super hard rhythms, it is even not overdosed to call it Hard.
Rhythm and placement of course need polishments.
Remaped by Panda
[Hard]
You've placed quite a few jumps in the first half of the diff while there could hardly be jumps in the rest half, even in Kiai. I'd strongly advise to fix this inconsistency. color=#FF0000]fix[/color]
00:12:663 (3,1) - Not wise to cover reverse arrows. fix
00:35:410 (1,2,3,4) - The slider-end triplets as well as 1/4 reverse slider is amongst the most intense rhythms you've placed in this diff. I wonder if it really deserves such intense rhythms. This part is quite soft and calm. fix
01:14:641 (3,4) - Thought there are too many such sliders. Maybe swap them for 1/2 sliders and circles. fix

[Mirash's Insane]
SV is quite fast yet spacing is quite low overall (1/2s are mostly in normal spacing with sudden huge jumps).
This is the main problem of this difficulty.

[toybot's Insane]
00:46:289 (1) - It makes me want to put this further for emphasis on cymbal.
01:10:023 - I did not get the idea of this spacing decrease. It might need to grow to be larger instead according to the music.
01:14:641 (1,2,1,2) - Should be in consistent (visual) spacing imo.

[Loreley's Extra]
01:12:993 (2) - I'd recommend to emphasize the slider-end out.
01:23:707 (2,3,4,5,6) - Too weak for a five-note stream.
01:32:114 (5,1) - Meh blanket

[Top diff]
00:22:883 (3,1) - Put it further to prevent it from being read as 1/2, like this: 00:24:861 (3,1) - fix

Top diffs are finr, my biggest concerns fall onto the lower ones. You need to find more help or mod for them. Maybe you could poke me back when you think you're ready.

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2018-03-11T14:37:35+00:00

why not add a slider-slide?

Lama Poluna

796 posts

Joined June 2014

Topic Starter

Lama Poluna 2018-03-12T15:27:29+00:00

Regraz wrote:
why not add a slider-slide?

add!!

timemon

Beatmap Nominator

1,305 posts

Joined November 2012

timemon 2018-03-15T17:26:52+00:00

General

I think soft-hitfinish is a bit too loud in the kiai
offset sounds off, it is quite early. I think offset around ~148 ms is better.
Check video offset for Loreley's and Mirash's they are different than others.
MA, possible hitsound delay for drum-hitfinish.wav.

Easy

00:53:872 - I believe you can afford a circle here because you have another gap ahead of it anyway. It is in the build up and I think you should map it.
01:15:465 - Maybe push this spinner to the red tick. atm it appears so early and can throw newbies off (spinner shows up before slider is done)

PandaHero's Normal

00:25:355 (4,5,6) - this part you switch to the instrument but I think the 00:25:850 (6) - slider lands on a weak sound while 00:26:015 - is skipped.
I believe that mapping 00:26:015 - over 00:25:850 - is a good idea.
00:32:938 (3,5) - they should share similar angle for neat visual, but anyway I think 00:33:762 (5) - angle is a bit too wide.
01:00:465 - seems a bit weird that with such heavy emphasis on vocal you would make the strongest of them all end on a slider tail. I think it's better to make 00:59:971 (3) - a 1/1 slider then map 01:00:465 - . Example like this: https://i.imgur.com/oPHomEG.png (in this case the circle after is replaced)
01:03:103 (2,3) - the vocal stops and I think its better to immediately switch to the cymbal rather than keeping following the dragging sound of the vocal.
I think using rhythm like this would be cool https://i.imgur.com/JirRYAP.png (properly following both vocal and instruments!)
01:15:300 (1,2,3,4,5,1,2,3,4,5,6) - this rhythm section is probably my major concern: the rhythm feels random and could use some work especially at 01:16:289 (3,4,5) - . I think using the rhythm like this will help improve the rhythm. https://i.imgur.com/JmLX2bW.png

Mirash's Insane

00:12:993 (8,1,2,3) - Why are the objects so close to each other? I think it might be too close and can be uncomfortable, this spacing is lower than the general spacing you would use in the map.
00:55:026 (3,4,5) - similar case and a bit inconsistent visual spacing as well
00:30:300 (6,1,2,3) - Considering that you only do a single 1/4 after a slider 3 times or so in the whole map. Having one in the section where the music is rather calm feels very sudden and unexpected. This could surprise the player and I think calm section should not surprise people. Making the slider 1/1 or change to easier rhythm will fit better imo
01:25:026 (7,8) - This spacing is simply too much, it would be fine in a map with larger general spacing but in this one, it's just too big.
01:33:762 (1) - minor, but why not line this up with 01:33:432 (3,4) - ?

Falls into the sky

00:42:663 (3) - I think this should be 2 circles. 00:42:333 (1,2,3,1,2) - come from the same pattern of sound, it would be weird for 00:42:663 (3) - to have less emphasis than the others.
01:14:311 - the stream actually starts here (so you ignored 01:14:394 - ) I don't feel like the song rhythm sounds like double in anyway, not to mention the map isn't really built around double concept. I think these doubles will just be annoying for players without musical justification for its existence. I suggest going for simpler rhythms here and map the ignored tick.
01:07:059 (1) - is the NC intentional?

Loreley's Extra

00:20:905 (1,2,3,4,1) - This pattern shape could be improved, it looks so messy imo. Which makes it stand out when everything else in the map is not really mapped like this.
01:30:795 (1,2,1) - This pattern is the only weird pattern that plays out weirdly in the map. If you want to keep the movement I think it's better to just make them streams, or spread the sliders out.
00:45:630 (4) - I think this one should be a kick slider like 00:45:960 (6) - instead of 00:45:136 (2) - because of the way you map this sound for example at 00:46:619 (2) - .

toybot's Insane is solid
Hard also looks fine

Yea all done

Last edited by timemon 2018-03-19T11:03:40+00:00, edited 10 times in total.

PandaHero

662 posts

Joined November 2011

PandaHero 2018-03-15T19:06:23+00:00

timemon wrote:
General
I think soft-hitfinish is a bit too loud in the kiai
PandaHero's Normal
00:25:355 (4,5,6) - this part you switch to the instrument but I think the 00:25:850 (6) - slider lands on a weak sound while 00:26:015 - is skipped.
I believe that mapping 00:26:015 - over 00:25:850 - is a good idea.
I got your point, remade this place
00:32:938 (3,5) - they should share similar angle for neat visual, but anyway I think 00:33:762 (5) - angle is a bit too wide.
okie, made it less wide
01:00:465 - seems a bit weird that with such heavy emphasis on vocal you would make the strongest of them all end on a slider tail. I think it's better to make 00:59:971 (3) - a 1/1 slider then map 01:00:465 - . Example like this: https://i.imgur.com/oPHomEG.png (in this case the circle after is replaced)
ok
01:03:103 (2,3) - the vocal stops and I think its better to immediately switch to the cymbal rather than keeping following the dragging sound of the vocal.
I think using rhythm like this would be cool https://i.imgur.com/JirRYAP.png (properly following both vocal and instruments!)
No-no, I like to follow vocals until the end ><
01:15:300 (1,2,3,4,5,1,2,3,4,5,6) - this rhythm section is probably my major concern: the rhythm feels random and could use some work especially at 01:16:289 (3,4,5) - . I think using the rhythm like this will help improve the rhythm. https://i.imgur.com/JmLX2bW.png
I tried to follow guitar solo and make it less scary for newbies, I'm afraid that if I'll put two reverses so close it will be hard

thanks!

https://pandahero.s-ul.eu/Ij85nlI8

tatemae

836 posts

Joined November 2014

tatemae 2018-03-19T13:40:50+00:00

timemon wrote:
Loreley's Extra
00:20:905 (1,2,3,4,1) - This pattern shape could be improved, it looks so messy imo. Which makes it stand out when everything else in the map is not really mapped like this. did smh
01:30:795 (1,2,1) - This pattern is the only weird pattern that plays out weirdly in the map. If you want to keep the movement I think it's better to just make them streams, or spread the sliders out. sounds as two identical repeating sounds therefore I have make 2 kick sliders 01:30:795 (1,2) - well im added more spacing probably now its plays fine for me~
00:45:630 (4) - I think this one should be a kick slider like 00:45:960 (6) - instead of 00:45:136 (2) - because of the way you map this sound for example at 00:46:619 (2) - I have removed kick slider from this sections except 00:44:146 (2) - for triple.
toybot's Insane is solid
Hard also looks fine

Yea all done

thanks for mod!
лама, почекай или скопируй хсы, я ритм поменял кое-где

osu file format v14

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Title:Kuukirikigaku Shoujo to Shounen no Uta
TitleUnicode:空気力学少女と少年の詩
Artist:Hana
ArtistUnicode:はな
Creator:Lama Poluna
Version:Loreley's Extra
Source:素晴らしき日々～不連続存在～
Tags:すかぢ szak SCA-ji Subarashiki Hibi ~Furenzoku Sonzai~ KeroQ うさ Utaite Usa Wonderful Everyday Discontinuous Existence Diskontinuierliches Dasein Fuminori Matsumoto 松本文紀 metrowing SubaHibi visual novel vn Loreley toybot Mirash Byby KittyAdventure sherrycherry allihoppa PandaHero gokugohan12468
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h4d0uk3n1 wrote:

[ White Music ] wrote:

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