ESSAY FORMAT HERE WE GOOOO RREEEEERRR
[General]
To start I'm gonna say I messed up the last 2 notes to start you off with 00:38:075 (1,2) being ever so slightly off center by 1 pixel vertically and 1 pixel horizontally. This is going to be an extremely knit picky mod with that said. Also one small note, I really have no idea of your experience with everything so I'm breaking everything down in very intricate detail.
////This is going to take a little while to go over so get comfortable\\\\ In general I could tell most of what you mapped was freehand which means little cut&paste, mirrors, manual snapping etc. I don't mean this is a bad thing because some mappers such as pishifat do this quite often, but the entire map say pishi would be working on is like that and some parts are still done with a "picture perfect" mindset with mirroring notes manual snapping and so on. The problem is around 20 notes I mapped in total were freehand and nearly every single one of them corresponded to the following notes in some perfectionist way. It's something that is a lot more noticeable with lower AR if don't have too much of an idea of what I'm getting at but here's some examples: (A lot of the intro's spaced out notes will be freehand)
I really don't know how experienced you are so you can click on these times for the map and if you have the map in the editor in osu it directs you to them. Also to get the times how I have just select the notes and Ctrl+C them, and just paste in text anywhere.
00:00:675 (1,2,1) - Perfect Triangle.
00:03:075 (1,2,3,4,1) - 1 & 1 overlap because same sound and larger jump than last notes because more sound.
00:04:475 (1,2,3) - Perfect Distance.
00:05:275 (1,1,2) - First note and last note same sound, same spot.
00:11:275 (1,2,3) - Perfect distance but weaker sound than 00:04:475 (1,2,3) so less distance.
00:12:675 (1) - Perfectly aligned with 00:11:275 (1,2,3) and is a mirror (Ctrl+H&J) of 00:13:075 (2).
00:13:075 (2) - Blanketed by 00:13:475 (1,2).
00:14:275 (4,5) - Copy paste rotate of 00:13:475 (1,2).
00:15:675 (3,4,5) - Copy paste of 00:14:875 (6,1,2).
00:16:475 (6) - Scaled down 00:15:875 (4), same distance as the other 2 sliders, and blanketed by 00:16:675 (1)'s sharp angle.
This should be enough because after this point it's most of the same concepts being reiterated.
With all this gone over the problem is you're part isn't complete garbage; but it's a bad imitation. A big issue is it's too noticeably different of a mapping style when it can't be because you're mapping the same rhythm and the same style should be used. If the style changes and the rhythm doesn't, often times the map can end up being a cluttered mess. A little note to go over, a lot of collabs can be done with extremely varying mapping styles without throwing players off too much and can be a very good map; the thing about the scenario usually however, is the song calls for it by having various rhythms. It would be a lot easier to pull off a collab like this yes, but my intent is to give you some know-how on mapping and expand how you can map rather than have you confined to only your own current established style as this exact thing helped me even without the mapper's feedback
(<3 u AC). And before any thoughts begin of "oh so you're teaching me to map like you," No. This isn't my style. This is the most perfectionist mapping solely based on being a very clean, intuitive style I could come up with. Now to actually get started...
[Mod]
00:39:075 (1) - Slider velocity feels a tad high for this whole part. It feels like it should be around 1.00 or 1.25 considering the rest of the map and its difficulty.
00:39:075 (1) - Should probably be horizontally centered considering the middle of 00:38:275 (2) is directly centered as well.
00:39:275 (2,3) - Should correspond with either the horizontal center or the previous notes (such as each slider begins on a different end of 00:38:275 (2)). Also with the way it looks, 3 should be Ctrl+VH(and maybe J) of 2. This will give you the same slider as 2 but reflected horizontally and vertically. I recommend keeping them vertically aligned aswell but it needs changed, they don't correlate with anything and the sliders have about a 1-2° difference and it's noticeable. Here's what the results can look like:
In general, modding each individual object placement is pointless as most of it should be subject to change. The most basic way I can put it is most of the object placement flows nicely; but it doesn't look as nice as it plays. After getting started by placing a few notes that look and play good, you should listen to the song and play the last 10 notes or so before the next one you're about to place over and over again and try to play the next note after the last one mapped. Around where you find your cursor ending up the majority of the time after playing the last 10 notes should be where the next note is mapped. Once you determine the general location for placement by doing this, you should make it correspond to the previous notes in some way to make it look good from making perfect shapes to blanketing notes. Some helpful hotkeys I use for making maps perfectionist are Ctrl+C, V, G, H, and J and Ctrl+Shift+R and S. You should try to make the map look as nice as it plays.
(Neglecting object placement in mod for the most part from here on)
00:41:075 (3,4,5) - are triplets. 00:41:075 (3) is right. 00:41:175 (4) should be 00:41:208 (4) (look at the differences in the offset/time). 00:41:275 (5) should be 00:41:341 (5). You can place them at these times by changing the Beat Snap Divisor in the top right from 1/4 to 1/3. Also once this is done, 00:41:475 (6) should be the same distance apart from 00:41:075 (3,4,5).
00:42:275 (1,2,3,4,1) - This part is too spaced and difficult considering this same part has been mapped previously with 4 slower sliders.
00:43:275 (8) - Slider has unappealing curve. Slider velocity (SV) change is kind of extreme; however the previous SV was already mentioned as too high so this might be okay if other SVs work with rather than against its flow and appeal.
00:46:275 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - This is very well done. The only things I would change are the distance between 1 & 2 as it's a bit too far, especially for how the rhythm is softer than other parts with a shorted distance; and how 8's body has an overlap with 5. A couple things I thought you could do was keep it's circle placement and make the body point to line up directly with 00:49:075 (3), or make the body point directly away from 7 and if that's done, maybe even curve it slightly.
00:48:675 (1,2,3,4,1) - Once again higher difficulty than what's called for.
00:49:675 (2,3) - Unappealing pair of slider bodies, angle could be larger among the 3 points of the slider.
00:50:875 (4,5,6,7,8,1,2) - Another part well done but less perfectionally styled than last good part mentioned.
Good luck mapping! I hope we can make a gem.
[Additional notes and tricks]
I GIEV IT UUUHHHH... 2/5 worst map ever created. loljk2/5 for your part+Decent Flow+A Couple Nice Combos-Mostly Unappealing and Uncoordinated-Not a Very Good Immitation (more like your own rendition)-Difficulty is Generally Higher4/5 = Rankable Don't forget the main reason we're doing this is less for the map and more so for you to learn and get some experience. I particularly aimed to get you experience in the parts of editor that you're less familiar with. That's why I've mentioned how this fails to be an imitation so often.
The most important part is you learning and you're not learning as much if you're doing something you're already comfortable doing. This is also the reason why the map is somewhat a lower difficulty too. I know you said you would rather map something more than 1/2 rhythms. I did just that but also kept it to a bit slower of a song so you could become more comfortable with mapping easier things. Say you're mapping a crazy sh*t 300 bpm heavy metal song and a slower part in the song begins. You'd probably map this the same difficulty just slower but note placement needs to change to become shorter distance in those parts usually as well. A good example of this would be the slower part in Mazzerin's Spawn of Possession - Apparition (
https://osu.ppy.sh/s/216979).
If you're making a larger slider you have more options and 3 points just making an O shaped slider. Me personally I generally like really crazy sliders but with this map I tried keeping them relatively simplistic. A trick to sliders that works really great is for a longer slider such as 00:28:675 (3), you can almost always pull off an appealing slider shape by just getting 2 generally smaller sliders and making one bigger one out of them...there's no way to do this in the editor unless you go in the .osu file and do some shit, but generally it's pretty easy to pull off. This slider is just a regular slider with one edge point in the middle combined with another slider that's just a slider with a curved point in the middle. Even 00:26:875 (3) is a more simply put version of what I just mentioned. It's a small straight slider combined with a longer straight slider. Really simple and works really well. Just a cool little trick to help you make more appealing sliders.
Total allotted time to make this:
3 hoursxd rip me no kudosu