Top diff on request:
00:00:640 - map the vocals?
00:02:846 (4,5) - woah spacing. Cross screen jump without much reason . . .
00:10:199 (3,4) - hard to read
00:05:640 (1,2,3) - I'd move this pattern so it doesn't overlap with 00:04:169 (1) -
00:14:464 (5,3) - I notice these kind of overlaps throughout the whole map. instead of following distance spacing, add more structure to your map with stacks, symmetry and if you want overlaps, consistent ones.
00:17:258 (8,1) - same deal as before, hard to read
00:20:640 (1) - fix the slider, it's not that pretty as it is like sliders used from old mapping
00:20:640 (1,3) - blanket fix as well. Perhaps not so snug would be good
00:21:228 (3,1) - stacks are nice, but be consistent with them with other jumps like this one
00:21:817 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - however this jump pattern is messy. use consistent angles between jumps while not making it needlessly hard to read with these kind of stacks
00:22:993 (1,3) - go for blankets instead. Looks messy
00:25:934 (3,4) - spacing is too small imo compared to the spacing before
00:27:111 (5,6) - not a big fan of these
00:32:405 (1,2) - rhythms like this (this note applies elsewhere as well, but there's too many to point out) aren't really conventional imo. Wasn't comfortable on sightread for me and even on retries after my fingers aren't comfortable click those.
00:33:581 (1) - (this comment will apply throughout your whole map) place your notes so that they don't look messy by overlapping with other notes, in this case 00:32:405 (1,2) - .
00:38:728 (5,6,7,8,9,1) - why the gradual lowering in spacing?
00:41:081 (2,3,4) - this rhythm choice is the one that stuck out the most. why the triple?
00:49:022 (10,1,2,3,4,5,6) - your jumps so far have been sharp angle turns that are conventionally more comfortable play, so why the sudden wide angle jumps?
00:58:287 - your whole kiai was weird to play because your SV is so high and some jumps were very large, making my cursor momentum very fast, but in the middle of fast paced music, you sometimes made patterns that were smaller spacing than the calm parts of the song.
Fundamentally, you need to work on structure and rhythm.
Always make sure every note you place has a reason behind it: why is it on this part of the screen and why is it on this timeline.
I suggest watching some of pishifat's videos on youtube and watching some twitch streams of mappers if you catch any online.
Goodluck on your map