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Kawano Marina - Weight of the World Kowaretasekainouta

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Rizen
hoi
23:09 Rizen: did you and kalibe do hitsounds seperately?
23:10 Lilyanna: no
23:10 Lilyanna: i did all hitsounds
23:11 *Lilyanna is editing [https://osu.ppy.sh/b/1262823 Kawano Marina - Weight of the World Kowaretasekainouta [Believing]]
23:11 Lilyanna: o k tell me
23:11 Rizen: 00:57:686 (3) - whistle for piano
23:11 Rizen: 01:03:362 (3,4,5) - ^
23:11 Rizen: 02:43:092 (1) - ^
23:11 Rizen: 03:20:389 (1,3) - missing custom for claps
23:12 Lilyanna: what u mean?
23:12 Rizen: ^ compared to claps at 01:33:362 (5,7) - they're pretty different so use the same clap sample
23:12 Lilyanna: i did normal claps
23:12 Lilyanna: they dont fit?
23:12 Lilyanna: ok
23:12 Rizen: like
23:12 Rizen: the claps are just different
23:13 Rizen: well
23:13 Lilyanna: i didnt use clap
23:13 Rizen: the first time it's normal sampleset
23:13 Lilyanna: in first one
23:13 Lilyanna: just normal samplesets
23:13 Rizen: but then used clap in second
23:13 Lilyanna: ye
23:13 Rizen: best to stick with one, personally I like the normal samps
23:13 Lilyanna: i removed it xd
23:13 Lilyanna: ye same xd
23:13 Lilyanna: fixed
23:13 Rizen: also
23:13 Lilyanna: 01:20:389 -
23:13 Lilyanna: fixed here same
23:14 Lilyanna: 01:20:997 -
23:14 Lilyanna: xd
23:14 Rizen: for like kalibe's part, u stopped using the finish
23:14 Rizen: e.g. 02:33:362 (1) - vs 00:46:335 (1) -
23:14 Rizen: is this intentional orrrr
23:15 Lilyanna: or im retard
23:15 Lilyanna: then yes im retard xD
23:16 Lilyanna: it shold be whistle+finish right?
23:16 Rizen: yer if u wanted to use that finish hitsound instead of normal samp
23:17 Lilyanna: idk they didnt sound same to me
23:17 Lilyanna: but ill just use finish+whistle
23:18 Rizen: 03:47:957 (1,2,3,4,5) - use norm sampleset as you have done at 03:51:200 (1,2,3,4,5) - ?
23:20 Rizen: 04:00:524 (3) -
23:20 Rizen: change addition to soft?
23:21 Rizen: 04:12:281 (2) - whistle on slider head for piano? also because u did a similar thing at 04:15:524 (2) -
23:22 Rizen: 04:20:389 (1,2,3,4) - these sound kinda out of time with the vocals. would be wise to use a timing point here to snap them to the vocals properly
23:23 Rizen: ^ usually happens when singers sing without instruments in background so they use rhythm
23:23 Lilyanna: !!
23:24 Lilyanna: it does whsitle on head!
23:24 Rizen: o my bad
23:24 Lilyanna: seems
23:24 Lilyanna: to me the vocals snapped fine there
23:25 Rizen: mmm to me sounds like the vocals are a little late
23:26 Rizen: may need a second ear just to be sure
23:26 Lilyanna: u like sb
23:26 Lilyanna: ?
23:26 Lilyanna: i got many ears to check it
23:26 Rizen: I personally don't like the font
23:26 Lilyanna: even pros
23:26 Rizen: doesn't fit the font theme as your GD names font (curvy/fancy)
23:26 Lilyanna: and they said there slightly off but not so noticble and there nothing u can do about
23:27 Lilyanna: ;w;
23:27 Rizen: ah ok, so they were slightly off. I guess that's alrighttt
23:27 Lilyanna: i think ill remove the names
23:27 Lilyanna: of us
23:27 Lilyanna: xd
23:28 Lilyanna: ill see if he can change the font
Mun
this will be short because im bad xd

[Believing]
00:18:970 (5,6,7) - It's entirely personal aesthetic preference depending on what you are going for in the map, but these triangular patterns may look nicer if made equilateral.
00:36:605 (1) - What is this reverse slider following? There is no single track that it starts, finishes, and ends on - vocals start 1/8 beat before it, so it starts on piano, reverses on vocals, and ends on guitar. This is extremely inconsistent rhythm.
00:59:308 (1,2) - it's the most nitpicky thing in the universe, but the latter half of 1 and the first half of 2 are not parallel, but could be made so by rotating 00:59:916 (2) - by 2 degrees.
01:17:957 (2,3) - Considering that the nature of the vocals these 2 sliders are following are so different (2 starts and ends on stressed syllables, but 3 starts on a stressed syllable and ends on nothing), shouldn't they be represented differently? Either visually or rhythmically - considering this is half-BPM, you could extend 01:18:362 (3) - and adapt 01:18:767 (1) - to accommodate this.
01:20:186 - Despite having used circles to represent vocals in different rhythmic patterns earlier in the song, you do not do so here, even when you are already following vocal rhythm. Why is this?
01:33:767 (6,7) - This is the same intensity as 01:33:159 (4,5) - but the spacing is much lower. Why lower it so much instead of remaining consistent?
01:56:875 (6) - Considering that the piano chord has completely played within less than 1/16 of a beat, the end of this slider has no meaning in the music. Either extend it to fit the fact that said piano chord is held, or just use a hit circle.

Honestly, I don't see issues in Kalibe's part, and I can't stand the vocals in the 3rd section, so I'll just curtail it here.

Overall thoughts: has some interesting rhythm choice. Though it does feel a bit contrived at parts, it works. I like the storyboard! Good luck.
Kalibe
fixed couple of things
osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 81605
Countdown: 0
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
EpilepsyWarning: 1
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13902,120930,227957
DistanceSpacing: 1.6
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 4
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Weight of the World Kowaretasekainouta
TitleUnicode:Weight of the World/壊レタ世界ノ歌
Artist:Kawano Marina
ArtistUnicode:河野万里奈
Creator:Lilyanna
Version:Believing
Source:NieR:Automata
Tags:Kalibe Keiichi Okabe japanese version
BeatmapID:1262823
BeatmapSetID:597326

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:7
CircleSize:4.6
OverallDifficulty:7
ApproachRate:8
SliderMultiplier:2.4
SliderTickRate:1

[Events]
//Background and Video events
0,0,"bg.jpg",0,0
//Break Periods
2,317345,319639
//Storyboard Layer 0 (Background)
//Storyboard Layer 1 (Fail)
//Storyboard Layer 2 (Pass)
//Storyboard Layer 3 (Foreground)
//Storyboard Sound Samples

[TimingPoints]
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462,237,300727,2,0,P|386:232|357:188,1,120,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
304,123,301335,2,0,L|228:132,1,60,0|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
102,82,301740,2,0,L|178:91,1,60,0|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
171,185,302146,1,0,1:0:0:0:
232,60,302348,1,0,1:0:0:0:
117,240,302551,6,0,P|176:261|230:235,1,120,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
315,206,303159,2,0,P|369:185|424:207,1,120,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
260,106,303970,2,0,P|178:128|72:88,1,180,0|0,0:0|3:0,0:0:0:0:
41,17,304781,1,0,0:0:0:0:
32,155,304984,2,0,L|42:230,1,60,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
116,316,305389,2,0,L|108:256,1,60,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
150,164,305794,5,4,0:0:0:0:
205,276,305997,1,0,0:0:0:0:
250,20,306402,1,0,0:0:0:0:
303,144,306605,2,0,L|308:75,1,60,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
403,85,307011,2,0,L|407:144,1,60,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
375,277,307416,1,0,1:0:0:0:
303,144,307619,1,0,3:0:0:0:
130,347,308024,1,0,1:0:0:0:
112,202,308227,5,0,3:0:0:0:
124,56,308430,1,0,3:0:0:0:
58,274,308632,1,0,1:0:0:0:
46,128,308835,1,0,3:0:0:0:
230,147,309038,6,0,B|274:145|292:111|292:111|305:201|383:193|383:193|390:122,1,270.000010299683,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
313,262,310659,2,0,B|290:259|260:227|260:227|205:234|172:306|172:306|137:258|107:263,1,270.000010299683,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
88,117,312281,6,0,B|95:175|95:175|30:186|-15:251|28:326|61:339,1,270.000010299683,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
205,341,313902,1,2,0:0:0:0:
277,342,314105,1,2,0:0:0:0:
349,346,314308,1,2,0:0:0:0:
421,351,314511,2,0,P|403:298|358:273,1,90.0000034332277,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
205,144,315524,5,2,0:0:0:0:
277,143,315727,1,2,0:0:0:0:
349,139,315930,1,2,0:0:0:0:
421,135,316133,2,0,P|403:187|366:211,1,90.0000034332277,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
339,269,316740,2,0,L|431:292,1,90.0000034332277,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
103,53,320389,6,0,L|106:193,1,120,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
104,269,320997,1,0,0:0:0:0:
242,144,321402,1,0,0:0:0:0:
180,313,321808,1,0,0:0:0:0:
180,313,322213,1,0,0:0:0:0:
264,344,322416,1,0,0:0:0:0:
328,281,322619,1,0,0:0:0:0:
451,40,323227,1,0,0:0:0:0:
451,40,323632,6,0,P|382:62|321:31,1,120,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
272,107,324240,2,0,P|203:85|142:116,2,120,0|0|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
272,107,325457,1,0,0:0:0:0:
324,179,325659,1,0,0:0:0:0:
261,243,325862,1,0,0:0:0:0:
261,243,326875,6,0,P|310:309|310:345,1,120,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
221,325,327484,1,0,0:0:0:0:
186,148,327889,1,0,0:0:0:0:
97,304,328294,1,0,0:0:0:0:
97,304,328700,1,0,0:0:0:0:
66,220,328903,1,0,0:0:0:0:
129,156,329106,1,0,0:0:0:0:
399,68,330119,6,0,B|407:140|407:140|396:211,1,120,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
329,243,330727,2,0,B|321:171|321:171|332:100,2,120,0|0|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
329,243,331943,1,0,0:0:0:0:
257,295,332145,1,0,0:0:0:0:
193,232,332348,1,0,0:0:0:0:
256,192,333362,12,0,338227,0:0:0:0:
Osuology
[DONT STOP BELIEVING HOLD ON TO THAT FEELING]
00:18:970 (5,6,7) - plz rofl make this a equilateral triangle, it's not atm. 00:19:375 (7) - x:164, y:233 looks much better

00:22:213 (5,6,7) - ^ just fix the triangles lol

04:37:213 (2,3,4,5,1) - WTF HAPPENED TO HER VOICE LMAO

Anyways literally nothing else to point out lol good luck with this
Shmiklak
[Diff]
  1. 00:22:416 (6,7,8) - i hope it is possible to make those ones more straight
  2. 00:20:389 (1,2) - that blanket could be polished
    same goes for 00:40:659 (3,5) - and others
  3. 01:19:848 (2) - I suggest to move this one on 01:19:781 - so it will be much easier to read because placing objects on 1/12 is just stupid and too suddenly because there aren't any similar things. also imo vocal starts on 01:19:781 - not 01:19:848 -
  4. 01:03:362 (3,4,5) - these ones could be emphasised by using more DS to emphasis the piano sounds. with the current ds they feel the same as 01:03:159 (2) -
  5. 01:10:051 (2) - i suggest to change this one into a 1/2 repeat slider to emphasis this 01:10:254 - sound, also it will emphasis the vocals better
    same goes for 01:29:916 (3) - and others
  6. 02:13:902 (1) - I think this rythm would be much better https://puu.sh/vzXHY/264c9bd637.jpg because it emphasises vocals better
    same goes for 02:26:875 (1) - and others
  7. 05:33:362 (1) - imo this spinner could be till 05:39:848 - because music stops there
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Osuology wrote:

[DONT STOP BELIEVING HOLD ON TO THAT FEELING]
00:18:970 (5,6,7) - plz rofl make this a equilateral triangle, it's not atm. 00:19:375 (7) - x:164, y:233 looks much better

00:22:213 (5,6,7) - ^ just fix the triangles lol

04:37:213 (2,3,4,5,1) - WTF HAPPENED TO HER VOICE LMAO

Anyways literally nothing else to point out lol good luck with this
fixed the triangles i cant fix her voice lol thx

Shmiklak wrote:

[Diff]
  1. 00:22:416 (6,7,8) - i hope it is possible to make those ones more straight fixed previous mod
  2. 00:20:389 (1,2) - that blanket could be polished
    same goes for 00:40:659 (3,5) - and others fixed
  3. 01:19:848 (2) - I suggest to move this one on 01:19:781 - so it will be much easier to read because placing objects on 1/12 is just stupid and too suddenly because there aren't any similar things. also imo vocal starts on 01:19:781 - not 01:19:848 - i want make the drumps clickable and since the tail ends on 1/12 it should be fine also the vocals are close enough to the blue tick doing weird clickable snaps is just uncomfortable for me
  4. 01:03:362 (3,4,5) - these ones could be emphasised by using more DS to emphasis the piano sounds. with the current ds they feel the same as 01:03:159 (2) - ok yes fixed
  5. 01:10:051 (2) - i suggest to change this one into a 1/2 repeat slider to emphasis this 01:10:254 - sound, also it will emphasis the vocals better
    same goes for 01:29:916 (3) - and others that seem little overmapped for me i think the way is mapped is fine already
  6. 02:13:902 (1) - I think this rythm would be much better https://puu.sh/vzXHY/264c9bd637.jpg because it emphasises vocals better
    same goes for 02:26:875 (1) - and others
  7. 05:33:362 (1) - imo this spinner could be till 05:39:848 - because music stops there okay fixed
thank u for mods
Mitkoff
Hello,
From q,
looks really neat overall, so some thought generally minor.

[General]
Hs in kiai too loud, i don't hear beats at all , only hss. Imo 50% is fine, at least 60%.
Timing sometimes feels off, but i'm not good at this stuff so mb it's just my ears...

[Believing]

Lily
[]
  1. i wrote already i'm not timing expert but 00:34:375 (2,3,4) - it's like 25 offset off
  2. 00:35:186 - also i think this sound should be clicable , cause its inconsistant with other same sounded parts wich You map like triangles
  3. 00:53:632 (2,3,4,6,7,8) - You could simply copy that triangle , because i don't see any reason to make them with slight differences
  4. 01:06:605 (2,3,4,6,7,8) - ^
  5. 01:02:551 (1,2,3,4,5) - might be better blanket if You care
  6. 01:27:889 (8,9,10) - same visual spacing? http://puu.sh/vHyUb.jpg -> https://puu.sh/vHyWP.jpg
  7. 01:33:767 (6,7,8) - ^
  8. 01:46:538 (5,1,2,3) - ^
  9. 01:47:754 (6) - make on 1 line with 01:46:943 (1,2,3) - as You can see on screenshot https://puu.sh/vHzls.jpg now it's a bit off (copy 01:46:943 (1,3) - move 1on 3, delete new 1 and snap new 3 on time line for making perfect line... but i guess You know how to do that hhhh... sry)
  10. 03:52:619 (6,7) - why did You use jump here? it sounds calm, for example 03:55:862 (6,7) - have strong instruments but haven't jump
  11. 03:58:294 (12,1) - might be better blanket
  12. 04:00:930 (1,2,4) - on 1 line? like 04:00:321 (2,3,4) -
  13. 04:10:659 (1,2) - tone of music goes higher but sliders becomes slower it's make less sense with 04:13:902 (1) - where it goes lower and sliders goes slower too
Kalibe
[]
  1. 02:17:146 (1,2,3,6,7,8) - same angle triangles, since it's sound pretty equal by vocals
  2. 02:48:565 (5,6) - blanket?
  3. 03:02:551 (1,2) - ^
  4. 03:08:227 (1) - imo it's unnecessary NC
  5. 03:06:808 (1) - ^
  6. 03:43:092 - make it clicable , its really strong
[]

That's it.
GL~
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Mitkoff wrote:

Hello,
From q,
looks really neat overall, so some thought generally minor.

[General]
Hs in kiai too loud, i don't hear beats at all , only hss. Imo 50% is fine, at least 60%.
Timing sometimes feels off, but i'm not good at this stuff so mb it's just my ears... fixed the volume also i checked the timing its fine >w<

[Believing]

Lily
[]
  1. i wrote already i'm not timing expert but 00:34:375 (2,3,4) - it's like 25 offset off
  2. 00:35:186 - also i think this sound should be clicable , cause its inconsistant with other same sounded parts wich You map like triangles ah fixed
  3. 00:53:632 (2,3,4,6,7,8) - You could simply copy that triangle , because i don't see any reason to make them with slight differences they are copied lol
  4. 01:06:605 (2,3,4,6,7,8) - ^ same
  5. 01:02:551 (1,2,3,4,5) - might be better blanket if You care fixed
  6. 01:27:889 (8,9,10) - same visual spacing? http://puu.sh/vHyUb.jpg -> https://puu.sh/vHyWP.jpg
  7. 01:33:767 (6,7,8) - ^
  8. 01:46:538 (5,1,2,3) - ^ fixed all
  9. 01:47:754 (6) - make on 1 line with 01:46:943 (1,2,3) - as You can see on screenshot https://puu.sh/vHzls.jpg now it's a bit off (copy 01:46:943 (1,3) - move 1on 3, delete new 1 and snap new 3 on time line for making perfect line... but i guess You know how to do that hhhh... sry) fixed :p
  10. 03:52:619 (6,7) - why did You use jump here? it sounds calm, for example 03:55:862 (6,7) - have strong instruments but haven't jump fixed i ctrl g 5 and 6
  11. 03:58:294 (12,1) - might be better blanket fixed
  12. 04:00:930 (1,2,4) - on 1 line? like 04:00:321 (2,3,4) - fixed
  13. 04:10:659 (1,2) - tone of music goes higher but sliders becomes slower it's make less sense with 04:13:902 (1) - where it goes lower and sliders goes slower toowhat it make more sense it goes with the how tens the music is going slow and holds on to those slider by going slower :v
Kalibe
[]
  1. 02:17:146 (1,2,3,6,7,8) - same angle triangles, since it's sound pretty equal by vocals
  2. 02:48:565 (5,6) - blanket?
  3. 03:02:551 (1,2) - ^
  4. 03:08:227 (1) - imo it's unnecessary NC
  5. 03:06:808 (1) - ^
  6. 03:43:092 - make it clicable , its really strong
[]

That's it.
GL~
thx for mod

edit: kalibe gave me update so updated!
ZekeyHache
Nice, boobie #1~
Log
2017-05-07 10:40 ezek: ACTION is editing [https://osu.ppy.sh/b/1262823 Kawano Marina - Weight of the World Kowaretasekainouta [Believing]]
2017-05-07 10:40 ezek: 00:41:875 (6,7) - this blanket is off, fix it pls
2017-05-07 10:41 ezek: 01:02:551 (1,2) - this one can still be improved a tiny bit
2017-05-07 10:41 Lilyanna: http://puu.sh/vIEq7/57783dcb69.jpg
2017-05-07 10:41 ezek: nice
2017-05-07 10:42 Lilyanna: http://puu.sh/vIEtA/44ac1d66e0.jpg
2017-05-07 10:42 ezek: good
2017-05-07 10:43 ezek: 01:33:767 (6) - I suggest adding nc on this note for emphasis on the unusual change
2017-05-07 10:44 Lilyanna: ok rip sb
2017-05-07 10:44 ezek: the sb is fine :/
2017-05-07 10:45 Lilyanna: 01:47:957 - the colors here changed
2017-05-07 10:45 ezek: I think :v
2017-05-07 10:45 Lilyanna: when i add nc
2017-05-07 10:45 ezek: oh I see
2017-05-07 10:45 ezek: wait
2017-05-07 10:47 ezek: use colorhax this way so your sb doesn't get affected :p https://ezekk.s-ul.eu/YtETbNIE
2017-05-07 10:48 ezek: ezpz
2017-05-07 10:50 Lilyanna: yes genius
2017-05-07 10:50 Lilyanna: btw i used it directly on 01:47:957 (1) -
2017-05-07 10:50 Lilyanna: xd
2017-05-07 10:50 ezek: well, that's a good choice too
2017-05-07 10:51 ezek: 03:49:578 (5,6) - blanket
2017-05-07 10:51 Lilyanna: oh no urs better
2017-05-07 10:51 ezek: ok..
2017-05-07 10:51 ezek: do as you please :v
2017-05-07 10:51 Lilyanna: cuz when i click there i dont have the choice ofthe darker blue
2017-05-07 10:52 ezek: don't send me screenshot for blankets btw, i know you fix them nice
2017-05-07 10:53 ezek: 04:09:848 (1,2) - blanket
2017-05-07 10:53 Lilyanna: :V
2017-05-07 10:53 Lilyanna: omg
2017-05-07 10:53 Lilyanna: ezek
2017-05-07 10:54 ezek: hm?
2017-05-07 10:54 Lilyanna: nothing xd
2017-05-07 10:54 ezek: xp
2017-05-07 10:54 Lilyanna: fixed ;Y
2017-05-07 10:55 ezek: update the map
2017-05-07 10:57 Lilyanna: ok
2017-05-07 10:57 Lilyanna: nothing elsee?
2017-05-07 10:57 ezek: just wait :v
2017-05-07 11:02 Lilyanna: there
2017-05-07 11:02 Lilyanna: extra whistle i need update again
2017-05-07 11:02 Lilyanna: xD
2017-05-07 11:02 ezek: k
2017-05-07 11:02 Lilyanna: this normal whistle out of no where and like peeeeeep
2017-05-07 11:03 ezek: I thought you had a couple of unsnapped sliders but it's just 1/12 lul
2017-05-07 11:03 ezek: update
2017-05-07 11:04 Lilyanna: a min
2017-05-07 11:07 Lilyanna: done
2017-05-07 11:09 ezek: k
2017-05-07 11:09 ezek: ready?
2017-05-07 11:10 Lilyanna: yessss
Topic Starter
Lilyanna
Thank you :V
-sandAI
Helo i have question

Japanese name should be 壊レタ世界ノ歌 (Kowareta Sekai no Uta)

With 'english' name being The Weight of the World instead of just 'Weight of the World'

somebody double check with me but the title should definitely not be how it is now.

Or rather (idk if this is rankable, but) To have consistency with the name, Have the roman character title be "The Weight of the World / Kowareta Sekai no Uta" so it matches it's counter part, "The Weight of the World / 壊レタ世界ノ歌"
_sponez
Hello!

  1. 01:20:288 - A word is pronounced here, but it does not stand out. Need circle. For example, here I want to click. Similary here 03:07:315.
  2. 02:13:902 (1) - This slider must end here 02:14:308 and here 02:14:511 need circle.
  3. 03:42:686 (4,5) - https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/8050486.
Very good map. Good luck!
Wikozo
M4M from my queue ;)

[Believing]
  1. 00:27:281 (2) - you can do the same slider like this 00:27:686 (3) but in the same place. like this :
  2. 02:36:808 (2) - you can't get this slider a little bit up
  3. 03:33:362 (1,2,3,1,1,2,1,2) - on this circles there is a big confusion
  4. 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - ^
  5. 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - ^
Very good map! Good Luck! :D
Topic Starter
Lilyanna
@Wikozo u so late i even forgot.. anyway thx for help ill apply mod with second bn check since they short simple.. if i find XD
ZekeyHache

Lilyanna wrote:

@Wikozo u so late i even forgot.. anyway thx for help ill apply mod with second bn check since they short simple.. if i find XD
If you wanna change something just do it and I'll rebub :v
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

_sponez wrote:

Hello!

  1. 01:20:288 - A word is pronounced here, but it does not stand out. Need circle. For example, here I want to click. Similary here 03:07:315. it used to be mapped tbh but then its the only 1/6 in map and its so close to upbeat the white tick which is the claps therefore we decided not map it so no confusing and the claps also stronger and more emphasised so it should be fine
  2. 02:13:902 (1) - This slider must end here 02:14:308 and here 02:14:511 need circle. ill ask kalibe for this since its his part if he change ill give kds if not then sorry no change xd
  3. 03:42:686 (4,5) - https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/8050486. idk what u want say with this picture
Very good map. Good luck!
thx for mod

Wikozo wrote:

M4M from my queue ;)

[Believing]
  1. 00:27:281 (2) - you can do the same slider like this 00:27:686 (3) but in the same place. like this : but i did it that way multiple of time its fine i just like that flow better
  2. 02:36:808 (2) - you can't get this slider a little bit up since its on screen it should be fine http://puu.sh/vWdcV/1ae52d456c.jpg
  3. 03:33:362 (1,2,3,1,1,2,1,2) - on this circles there is a big confusion its to emphasise the music tens
  4. 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - ^
  5. 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - ^ i see nothing wrong u didnt give me reason xd its readable and neat
Very good map! Good Luck! :D
sorry no change im not allowed to give kds since i didnt change >w< !
Topic Starter
Lilyanna
ddddd
dddd
I have read the rules in Kibbleru's queue
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

IamKwaN wrote:

ye sure

Unicode Title: Weight of the World/壊レタ世界ノ歌
Romanised Title: Weight of the World Kowaretasekainouta
Unicode Artist: 河野万里奈
Romanised Artist: Marina Kawano
Source: NieR:Automata

References:
http://www.square-enix.co.jp/music/sem/ ... /automata/
https://www.sonymusicshop.jp/m/item/ite ... 30ISDu4DtQ
http://www.jp.square-enix.com/nierautomata/
http://www.niergame.com/gb/
http://kawanomarina.com/

good luck!
just to be clear with bns and from pm big thx again :)
riffy
Hey!

[General]
  1. It would be good to have the name of the storyboarder added to the tags. You know, they did contribute to this map.
[Believing]


  • Lilyanna
  1. 00:24:240 (2) - this really should be replaced with two circles to match the rhythm you were using previously.
    Note: 00:46:943 (2) - same, perhaps. The patterning feels pretty close to the first one.
  2. 01:03:159 (2,3) - that is quite a straightforward way to introduce jumps. I feel like we should reduce the spacing, to make the jump feel more natural and easier to understand.
    Note: 01:27:281 (7,8,9) - same. I really doubt that the spacing changes are large enough to justify the jumps.
  3. 00:48:160 (4,5,6,7,8) - you have mixed up vocals and instruments. And ended up with the pattern that emphasises neither of them. I see that you try to use slider/circle difference to separate rhythms, but it still feels sort of overdone. Consider sticking to a certain instrument instead of just mixing everything? This way the rhythm will be way easier to follow and feel more natural.
  4. 00:56:065 (1,2) - this and some similar patterns - the flow change feels a little bit sharp, since it's a slow song, let's try something softer? more circular patterns
  5. 01:14:713 (5) - the vocals are snapped on the blue tick ahead, actually. In case you were going for the repeating 1/4 instruments, you can keep the slider, but you'd have to map 01:13:497 - as well.
  6. 01:22:619 (4) - pretty sure that two circles or two 1/4 sliders would do better. The idea is to emphasise 01:23:024 - as well as the beat before. Tey are pretty much even in strength and are supported by vocals.
    Note: 01:25:862 (4) - same, I believe.
  7. 01:19:781 (2) - as it has been mentioned by Natsu, the vocals are actually following 1/2 rhythm.
  8. 03:48:767 (3,4) - the jump here feels like an overkill, I believe that the spacing should be much smaller as the slider does not highligh any strong beats.
  9. 04:11:267 - why are you ignoring these beats? As we were discussing the map you made it clear that your intention was to stress as many beats as you could.
  10. 04:53:024 (2) - try to remove and add a slider to (1)? This citcle feels really weak and it appears to be done mostly for polarity purpsoses.

[Kalibe]
  1. 03:11:470 (3,4,5) - all three of them sound very similar, yet they are spaced in 3 different ways. One is stacked, the first one has a jump and the last one uses regular spacing. I would probably just space all three of these objects to form a small jumpy pattern.
  2. 03:42:078 (3,4,5) - let's reverse the pattern and space 3-4 close as the sound on (4) is really weak and then give (5) a small jump as it gets more tense. What do you think?
Hit me up when done, we'll see how it goes
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Bakari wrote:

Hey! hi

[General]
  1. It would be good to have the name of the storyboarder added to the tags. You know, they did contribute to this map. okay
[Believing]


  • Lilyanna
  1. 00:24:240 (2) - this really should be replaced with two circles to match the rhythm you were using previously. fixed
    Note: 00:46:943 (2) - same, perhaps. The patterning feels pretty close to the first one. i want leave it mapped diifferently there since there is vocals and the slider follows the "weeeh"
  2. 01:03:159 (2,3) - that is quite a straightforward way to introduce jumps. I feel like we should reduce the spacing, to make the jump feel more natural and easier to understand. yes fixed
    Note: 01:27:281 (7,8,9) - same. I really doubt that the spacing changes are large enough to justify the jumps. those spacing changed in every same 3 circles in rest of 3 kiais so i think its fine
  3. 00:48:160 (4,5,6,7,8) - you have mixed up vocals and instruments. And ended up with the pattern that emphasises neither of them. I see that you try to use slider/circle difference to separate rhythms, but it still feels sort of overdone. Consider sticking to a certain instrument instead of just mixing everything? This way the rhythm will be way easier to follow and feel more natural. i mapped the piano with circles and the vocals with 1/4 sliders i think its clear enough x) dont see any confusion they both expressed differently
  4. 00:56:065 (1,2) - this and some similar patterns - the flow change feels a little bit sharp, since it's a slow song, let's try something softer? more circular patterns its still circular that way but ye ill change
  5. 01:14:713 (5) - the vocals are snapped on the blue tick ahead, actually. In case you were going for the repeating 1/4 instruments, you can keep the slider, but you'd have to map 01:13:497 - as well. remapped and fixed that part i didnt really understand what u tried to say but from what i saw
    on my map i got it i guess and fix it xd
  6. 01:22:619 (4) - pretty sure that two circles or two 1/4 sliders would do better. The idea is to emphasise 01:23:024 - as well as the beat before. Tey are pretty much even in strength and are supported by vocals.agreed fixed
    Note: 01:25:862 (4) - same, I believe. but here i prefer keep it like that its not as much stronger as the first in terms of vocals tbh
  7. 01:19:781 (2) - as it has been mentioned by Natsu, the vocals are actually following 1/2 rhythm. please listen in slowest speed it goes after the red and the sallybal didnt even pronounced yet untill where its already snapped 1/12 pls take time and listen again if i am wrong ill go to ear doctor XD
  8. 03:48:767 (3,4) - the jump here feels like an overkill, I believe that the spacing should be much smaller as the slider does not highligh any strong beats. i dont really think its big jump or big deal and since yes i believe the slider hold a certain sound that can be emphasised if u listen to it
  9. 04:11:267 - why are you ignoring these beats? As we were discussing the map you made it clear that your intention was to stress as many beats as you could. 04:10:659 - because i believed its about time to prioritize that music in bg the drums are becoming secondary at that point and that music of the long sliders its dominating the whole thing and its time to express them!
  10. 04:53:024 (2) - try to remove and add a slider to (1)? This citcle feels really weak and it appears to be done mostly for polarity purpsoses. its not weak at all i clearly hear something same as (1) i prefer keep it it even has finish because it follows a strong enough sound


Hit me up when done, we'll see how it goes
thx for mod ill wait for kalibe to give me update and poke u hope i convice u with what i changed and i didnt :)
riffy
Assuming 00:48:767 (7,8) - these are sliders to fit the vocals, you mihgt want to replace 00:49:578 (1) - with circles to follow the same idea and represent instruemnts. Otherwise, you're contadicting your own ideas in the next pattern. The snapping of the slidertails is also kind of a questionable matter to me as I feel like they could've been snapped in a better way.

oh, and I have overlooked one more thing. 01:29:916 (3,4,5,6,1) - can you explain the way flow works here? If I got it right, 01:30:524 (4,5,6) - are drop-offs, therefore, the transition to (1) has a pretty sudden angle change and feels broken.
Kalibe

_sponez wrote:

Hello!

  1. 02:13:902 (1) - This slider must end here 02:14:308 and here 02:14:511 need circle. i want to express this powerful deep sound with 3/4

Bakari wrote:

Hey!

[Believing]

[Kalibe]
  1. 03:11:470 (3,4,5) - all three of them sound very similar, yet they are spaced in 3 different ways. One is stacked, the first one has a jump and the last one uses regular spacing. I would probably just space all three of these objects to form a small jumpy pattern. tried to fix, hope it's fine now
  2. 03:42:078 (3,4,5) - let's reverse the pattern and space 3-4 close as the sound on (4) is really weak and then give (5) a small jump as it gets more tense. What do you think? did something diffirent
thx for mods~

http://puu.sh/w3mLq/04fc169402.rar
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Bakari wrote:

Assuming 00:48:767 (7,8) - these are sliders to fit the vocals, you mihgt want to replace 00:49:578 (1) - with circles to follow the same idea and represent instruemnts. Otherwise, you're contadicting your own ideas in the next pattern. The snapping of the slidertails is also kind of a questionable matter to me as I feel like they could've been snapped in a better way. there is actualy a vocal there in the downbeat with the piano if i am not wrong also idk bout snapping not my fault she doesnt sing to the music xd ok thats at least what i thought im gonna remap this part

oh, and I have overlooked one more thing. 01:29:916 (3,4,5,6,1) - can you explain the way flow works here? If I got it right, 01:30:524 (4,5,6) - are drop-offs, therefore, the transition to (1) has a pretty sudden angle change and feels broken. the sudden angle change in intentional the (1) is a downbeat a new pattern and a strong sound so iwant take new turn and break flow tom express it better
Monstrata
Do you still need me for bubble? Looks like you might have enough BN's now.
riffy
Not really, go ahead, Monstrata. I'm okay with the explanations, but I'd rather not bubble it.
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Monstrata wrote:

Do you still need me for bubble? Looks like you might have enough BN's now.
seems like i need you.
Monstrata
Believing
hp 7 is pretty high for a song like this... I think 6 is enough.

lilyanna
00:18:970 (5,6,7) - 00:22:213 (5,6,7) - etc... I think perfect triangles fits ur aesthetics better.
00:38:430 (4,5,6,7) - Like visually, they just look a bit off unnecessarily i think
00:51:402 (4,5,6) - More consistency in DS?
01:06:605 (2,3,4) - This is good~
04:39:443 (1,2) - Can you make this blanket better or something, it looks really bad ;c

kalibe
03:02:551 (1,2) - Ehh blanket
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Monstrata wrote:

Believing
hp 7 is pretty high for a song like this... I think 6 is enough. fixed

lilyanna
00:18:970 (5,6,7) - 00:22:213 (5,6,7) - etc... I think perfect triangles fits ur aesthetics better. fixed
00:38:430 (4,5,6,7) - Like visually, they just look a bit off unnecessarily i think i dont really get what u mean :(
00:51:402 (4,5,6) - More consistency in DS? omg thats ugly fixed
01:06:605 (2,3,4) - This is good~
04:39:443 (1,2) - Can you make this blanket better or something, it looks really bad ;c eh fixed

kalibe
03:02:551 (1,2) - Ehh blanket

thank u monstrata im try polish more stuff in beginning like u said before updating x)

edit: fixed some stuff and fixed the blanket for Kalibe updated.

i guess Monstrata can just rebubble since he already modded it as for 2nd bubbled!
Monstrata

Lilyanna wrote:





Topic Starter
Lilyanna
XD thank you Monstrata !

edit: k am need pop i guess because i noticed there pattern changed in kalibe part that made the sb look weird so im wait for sb fix and reupdated!
bright side we have enough bubbles lol
Monstrata
Tbh, that didn't really require a pop, you could just poke next BN about it hehe. Anyways, renominated.
Kagetsu
hi

[General]
  1. your sb is broken? i dunno... it doesn't show the mapper names nor the songs lyrics, there are a lot of unused files.
  2. any official source for the metadata?
[Believing]
  1. 00:32:146 (6) - as previous rhythms were following vocals, this could do the same by using 1/2 instead
  2. 00:48:767 (7,8,1) - snapping is questionable... 00:49:443 - although this may sound like 1/6, most of the vocal notes in the song are off, i'd rather use 1/4 because it's more predictable, and it sounds better
  3. 00:57:078 (2) -01:10:051 (2) - this is off aswell, and it's also inconsistent compared with stuff like 02:43:092 (1,2,3) - or 02:56:065 (1,2,3) - , please make it consistent
  4. 01:03:159 (2) - this thing being a circle doesn't go well with the song imo, it kinda blends too much with piano, taking off the emphasis those notes need
  5. 03:53:632 (1,2,3,4) - i don't really agree with these rhythms, you're mapping two layers of the song at the same time which results in an unpredictable rhythm... personally i would go with something like this
  6. 04:00:930 (1,2,3,4) - kinda the same thing as previous, i believe 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4) - are following the strings, if so, then the jumps on 04:00:930 (1,2,3,4) - doesn't make much sense because you're mapping two different layers of the song using the same concepts
  7. 04:08:024 (4,5) - i don't really get why this jump is so big, it feels unbalanced if we consider that there's nothing different compared to the rest of the section
  8. 04:10:659 (1,2) - i get the idea behind these long sliders but it feels kinda undermapped for my taste, there are still some strong beats in the music such as 04:11:267 - 04:12:889 - etc... not to mention that the low sv combined with low object density feels unbalanced compared to the rest of the section which is not too different to this one
  9. 04:18:565 (6) -04:44:511 (6) - 04:57:484 (6) - most of these shapes look irregular, as if there wasn't too much effort on making them properly, not really an issue but i guess it's worth to mention
.
-sandAI
I wont be home till the 6th so i wont be able to review the sb until then sorry
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Kagetsu wrote:

hi

[General]
  1. your sb is broken? i dunno... it doesn't show the mapper names nor the songs lyrics, there are a lot of unused files.
  2. any official source for the metadata? t/579817/start=15 this quote from Iamkwan pm xd (scroll down the page last post)
[Believing]
  1. 00:32:146 (6) - as previous rhythms were following vocals, this could do the same by using 1/2 instead fixed
  2. 00:48:767 (7,8,1) - snapping is questionable... 00:49:443 - although this may sound like 1/6, most of the vocal notes in the song are off, i'd rather use 1/4 because it's more predictable, and it sounds better they were 1/4 fixed and i even felt uncomfortable little with because they the only different snaps xd
  3. 00:57:078 (2) -01:10:051 (2) - this is off aswell, and it's also inconsistent compared with stuff like 02:43:092 (1,2,3) - or 02:56:065 (1,2,3) - , please make it consistent fixed
  4. 01:03:159 (2) - this thing being a circle doesn't go well with the song imo, it kinda blends too much with piano, taking off the emphasis those notes need removed it xd
  5. 03:53:632 (1,2,3,4) - i don't really agree with these rhythms, you're mapping two layers of the song at the same time which results in an unpredictable rhythm... personally i would go with something like this there is really soft drums in the bg if i am not wrong if u listen carefully idk i kept them but i changed something small next pattern i made this clickable 03:55:254 -
  6. 04:00:930 (1,2,3,4) - kinda the same thing as previous, i believe 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4) - are following the strings, if so, then the jumps on 04:00:930 (1,2,3,4) - doesn't make much sense because you're mapping two different layers of the song using the same concepts i mapped 2 different layers with hitcircles that doesnt mean they mapped same since the first layer 04:00:119 (1,2,3,4) - not so big jumps and express a specific flow for that sound and second layer is 04:00:930 (1,2,3,4) - that has bigger jumpas and different flow that express different sound like the drum so for me they are not mapped the same
  7. 04:08:024 (4,5) - i don't really get why this jump is so big, it feels unbalanced if we consider that there's nothing different compared to the rest of the section lowed the jumps
  8. 04:10:659 (1,2) - i get the idea behind these long sliders but it feels kinda undermapped for my taste, there are still some strong beats in the music such as 04:11:267 - 04:12:889 - etc... not to mention that the low sv combined with low object density feels unbalanced compared to the rest of the section which is not too different to this one since you not the first one who said this i guess i change fixed xd
  9. 04:18:565 (6) -04:44:511 (6) - 04:57:484 (6) - most of these shapes look irregular, as if there wasn't too much effort on making them properly, not really an issue but i guess it's worth to mention polished more symmetrycal nodes with grid snap
.
thx alot for the mod if u disagree with something in my reply feel free to say so i can make more changes :p

@-Vanilla i guess we can wait its okay x)

Edit: fixed storyboard and updated!
-sandAI
dank but with an R instead

dark
Xinely
choose randomly from pigeon queue

i might wrong due downloaded this 3 days ago.. but on my side "sb\lite.png" is unused file

diff :
- 00:36:200 (8) - the drum is strong here, why not try make a bit jump to emphasis it better? example ctrl+g and move to 64,228
- 00:49:173 (8) - similar with above, might try ctrl+g or tweak the placement
- 00:50:592 (3) - any reason why spacing is different here?
- 01:11:470 (5,6,7,8,1) - somehow the star pattern design is off here
- 01:23:024 (5) - i would prefer move this to 160,232 to make a bit higher jump for emphasis vocal on next slider
- 01:34:173 (3) - drum whistle fits to emphasis the piano imo
- 01:37:213 (7) - the jump is weird. you cant hear any sound here but its mapped with higher spacing than 01:37:416 (8) - which has strong drum sound. i would say move 01:37:213 (7) - to 128,280
- 01:43:902 (6,7) - consistency shape for aesthetic pls?
- 01:57:686 - raise the volume to 40%. i cant hear the hitsound
- 02:24:848 (4,5) - if its supposed for blanket, pls fix it
- 02:48:565 (5,6) - ^
- 03:15:524 (1) - a bit weird aesthetic i think. would prefer move to 332,352 for at least be a mirror aesthetic with (2)
- 03:44:713 (1) - same as 01:57:686 -
- 03:58:091 (3) - it has weak sound but mapped with jump ee. i would say reduce the spacing even a bit like 284,304 to make at least difference spacing between 1 to 2 and 2 to 3

seems you have t2 bn already for qualify, just poke me if you need me but my goal is about writing some stuff i think can improve first
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Xinely wrote:

choose randomly from pigeon queue hello

i might wrong due downloaded this 3 days ago.. but on my side "sb\lite.png" is unused file removed

diff :
- 00:36:200 (8) - the drum is strong here, why not try make a bit jump to emphasis it better? example ctrl+g and move to 64,228 agree fixed
- 00:49:173 (8) - similar with above, might try ctrl+g or tweak the placement fixed
- 00:50:592 (3) - any reason why spacing is different here? >w< fixed
- 01:11:470 (5,6,7,8,1) - somehow the star pattern design is off here fixed
- 01:23:024 (5) - i would prefer move this to 160,232 to make a bit higher jump for emphasis vocal on next sliderfixed
- 01:34:173 (3) - drum whistle fits to emphasis the piano imo fixed and to be consistent on rest of all kiais
- 01:37:213 (7) - the jump is weird. you cant hear any sound here but its mapped with higher spacing than 01:37:416 (8) - which has strong drum sound. i would say move 01:37:213 (7) - to 128,280
- 01:43:902 (6,7) - consistency shape for aesthetic pls? fixed
- 01:57:686 - raise the volume to 40%. i cant hear the hitsound fixed
- 02:24:848 (4,5) - if its supposed for blanket, pls fix it fix
- 02:48:565 (5,6) - ^ fix
- 03:15:524 (1) - a bit weird aesthetic i think. would prefer move to 332,352 for at least be a mirror aesthetic with (2) fix
- 03:44:713 (1) - same as 01:57:686 - i dont get what u mean if about hitsound i think this fits okay
- 03:58:091 (3) - it has weak sound but mapped with jump ee. i would say reduce the spacing even a bit like 284,304 to make at least difference spacing between 1 to 2 and 2 to 3 fixed

seems you have t2 bn already for qualify, just poke me if you need me but my goal is about writing some stuff i think can improve first
Thank you again it was really helpful x)
ill poke kalibe for his part and if he allow me all do changes for him since they are minor changes.

kalibe let me fix for him so updated
Kagetsu
  1. 00:25:051 (4,5) - i don't get why this is stacked. looks inconsistent compared to 00:18:565 (4,5) - 00:21:808 (4,5) -
  2. 04:13:902 - the sv change is too sudden for such a high pitch, could gradually decrease sv instead
  3. 04:41:470 (2,3) - vs 04:42:686 (6,1) - kinda dislike how you're using stacks for two different time gaps
map is fine now. you could probably ask someone to confirm the lyrics tho
Topic Starter
Lilyanna

Kagetsu wrote:

  1. 00:25:051 (4,5) - i don't get why this is stacked. looks inconsistent compared to 00:18:565 (4,5) - 00:21:808 (4,5) - fixed
  2. 04:13:902 - the sv change is too sudden for such a high pitch, could gradually decrease sv instead fixed
  3. 04:41:470 (2,3) - vs 04:42:686 (6,1) - kinda dislike how you're using stacks for two different time gaps fixed removed second stack
map is fine now. you could probably ask someone to confirm the lyrics tho
i will im looking for someone know japanes lo thx again updated!
Pulse
[General]

  1. MONACA on tags;
  2. Remove japanese version from tags, unnecessary;
  3. Fix title name. Original title is Weight of the World/壊レタ世界ノ歌, Romanized Title must be equal. Also, I don't think that Kowaretasekainouta should stay together as shows on nier website. Idk if I'm right but it seems like Japan has their on "method" to romanize texts, and well, imo romanization should be the most western "friendly" possible, so consider changing to "Weight of the World/Kowareta Sekai no Uta", fixing name spacing and consistance;
  4. I think you should change Source to "ニーア オートマタ" and add romanized game name to tags;

    [Storyboard]
  5. There's a kanji error on 10th lyrics sb line (9.png): The 4th kanji is wrong, the correct would be 無, instead we have some kanji with the radical 手.
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