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soraru - Ringo Uri no Utakata Shoujo

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Xinely
hello

nao

general :
- title : 林檎売りの泡沫少女

Diff :
- OD 8,5 feels better imo because ur diff is an extra diff
- since 00:07:096 - to 00:15:089 - how about give whistle for every 4th whiteticks? whistle for downbeat only feel too empty imo
- 00:10:027 (2) - use 1,2x spacing for consistency with 00:08:428 (6) - ?
- 00:12:691 (1) - imo the spacing looks so small for emphasis the bell sound, try 1,5x spacing for at least consistent with 00:09:494 (1) - ?
- 00:14:955 (6) - use consistent spacing? 1,5x and 1,4x arent consistent at all
- 00:19:085 - whistle on head? somehow downbeat when music part change feels weird to hear w/o any emphasis
- 00:31:607 (3) - there is clap sound on bm, try use s:c1 clap?
- 00:39:467 (3,4) - ctrl+g gives better flow imo
- 00:40:400 (3) - why this slider has bigger jump than (4) when music on (4) is louder? i mean like its not like what you did in 00:37:202 (2,3) -
- 00:42:797 (4) - i would say having bigger jump for 00:43:064 (1) - is better than having it in this slider because vocal and crystal sound
- 00:45:462 - remove greenline since there is no sv changes
- 00:51:456 (3,4) - this anti jump feels weird because why you do spacing for catch (3) and nope for (4) when the drum at (4) is louder than (3). same for others like 00:46:128 (3) - etc
- 01:01:714 - clap because its similar with 01:01:980 -
- 01:02:113 (4,5,6,7) - from aethestic for ur flower pattern imo moving them all to 336,128 would look better
- 01:15:168 (6,1) - i feel like the flow is quite sharp if we see ur prev flow which are zig zag. try smoother it like move 01:15:168 (6) - to 160,172?
- 01:18:898 (3) - it feels weird when the drum is strong but mapped with stack or anti jump
- 01:23:161 (2) - move to 96,204 for blanket with (1)?
- 01:27:291 (1) - 1/4 feels weird because the sound is like around 1/8 01:27:391 - so imo better to change this to 1/2 slider
- 01:28:357 (2) - clap on head and remove on tail? i dont hear any drum at redtick
- 01:29:822 (5) - imo the flow is weird because the zig zag angle isnt same with 01:29:156 (1,2,4) - so i would say move that (5) to 436,184
- 01:37:148 (2) - ctrl+g feels smoother for transtition from (1)'s tail to (2)'s head
- 01:38:481 (2) - nazi but consistent spacing is better imo with move to 240,48
- 01:39:547 (6) - 01:44:342 - clap?
- 01:40:346 (2) - basically same as 01:37:148 (2) -
- 01:58:995 - volume should be 65% like first kiai
- 02:02:725 (3) - whistle on head? like 01:54:199 -
- 02:07:188 (5) - nazi but spacing on stream can be more consistent
- 02:11:118 (2,3) - if they are supposed for blanket, the blanket could be better
- 02:29:235 (2) - nazi but spacing can be more consistent
- 02:31:366 (2) - i still can understand with follow piano but imo skip drum at this case is weird because you following all drums before and seem like you are mapping based on drum especially at 02:23:507 - this part
- 02:33:897 (4,1) - the symmetrical can be better and not making symmetrical look weird based on ur design
- 02:41:090 (3) - having straight flow after a linear flow from 02:40:558 (1,2) - and linear again after that is weird imo, try ctrl+g instead to fix the flow?
- 02:41:756 (5) - just curious why jump in weak music
- 02:53:879 (1) - the flow is weird too imo because sudden change from 02:53:346 (5,6) - , how about ctrl+g this and then move 02:54:278 (2) - to 336,160?
- 02:58:674 (4,1) - i would say swap nc, see nc for the music is ok but break the consistent is weird especially 02:58:674 (4,5,1,2) - is a pattern
- 03:07:732 - also kinda weird to me, first kiai and second kiai are literally same but why SV changes are different here? (one with 1,4x the other one with 1,5x)
- 03:24:251 (3) - both head and tail are strong drum, how about change them to 2 circles? at least it would make sense like 01:58:462 (3,4,5,6) -
- 03:27:981 (1) - 360,100 for symmetrical with (3)
- 03:32:243 (1) - at least i hear a cymbal, how about finish? it gives nice emphasis for last note as well
- 03:44:898 (7) - stack can be better
- 04:13:806 (1) - move to 224,208 so spacing gap of 04:13:806 (1,2,3,4) - is consistent
- 04:28:726 (1) - add whistle because it sounds nicely
- 04:57:900 (4) - nazi, 284,360 for better blanket
- so ur kiai volume are too slow. ones are 48%, i saw 55% too and 65%. i hope you can make them more consistent (i personally prefer use 70% btw)
- and idk maybe its only me but i cant understand how your stacking are working here and yeah there are some flow which are weird imo so need to hear ur opinion about that
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori

Xinely wrote:

hello

nao

general :
- title : 林檎売りの泡沫少女

Diff :
- OD 8,5 feels better imo because ur diff is an extra diff
- since 00:07:096 - to 00:15:089 - how about give whistle for every 4th whiteticks? whistle for downbeat only feel too empty imo
- 00:10:027 (2) - use 1,2x spacing for consistency with 00:08:428 (6) - ?
- 00:12:691 (1) - imo the spacing looks so small for emphasis the bell sound, try 1,5x spacing for at least consistent with 00:09:494 (1) - ? flipped this with ctrl g
- 00:14:955 (6) - use consistent spacing? 1,5x and 1,4x arent consistent at all
- 00:19:085 - whistle on head? somehow downbeat when music part change feels weird to hear w/o any emphasis
- 00:31:607 (3) - there is clap sound on bm, try use s:c1 clap?
- 00:39:467 (3,4) - ctrl+g gives better flow imo i don't want spacing to next note to be that high though, i think it's ok
- 00:40:400 (3) - why this slider has bigger jump than (4) when music on (4) is louder? i mean like its not like what you did in 00:37:202 (2,3) -
- 00:42:797 (4) - i would say having bigger jump for 00:43:064 (1) - is better than having it in this slider because vocal and crystal sound i think as it is currently emphasizes the 1 circle a lot too since you have to change movement from wide angle to get there. changed it a bit though.
- 00:45:462 - remove greenline since there is no sv changes
- 00:51:456 (3,4) - this anti jump feels weird because why you do spacing for catch (3) and nope for (4) when the drum at (4) is louder than (3). same for others like 00:46:128 (3) - etc i'll explain why i stacked some things and not others at end
- 01:01:714 - clap because its similar with 01:01:980 -
- 01:02:113 (4,5,6,7) - from aethestic for ur flower pattern imo moving them all to 336,128 would look better
- 01:15:168 (6,1) - i feel like the flow is quite sharp if we see ur prev flow which are zig zag. try smoother it like move 01:15:168 (6) - to 160,172? moved this up to 01:14:236 (1) - 's end. i want big jump to 01:15:302 (1) - cuz of bass coming in and vocal phrase ending
- 01:18:898 (3) - it feels weird when the drum is strong but mapped with stack or anti jump
- 01:23:161 (2) - move to 96,204 for blanket with (1)?
- 01:27:291 (1) - 1/4 feels weird because the sound is like around 1/8 01:27:391 - so imo better to change this to 1/2 slider
- 01:28:357 (2) - clap on head and remove on tail? i dont hear any drum at redtick
- 01:29:822 (5) - imo the flow is weird because the zig zag angle isnt same with 01:29:156 (1,2,4) - so i would say move that (5) to 436,184 changed around a little, also lowered jump to 01:30:222 (1) -
- 01:37:148 (2) - ctrl+g feels smoother for transtition from (1)'s tail to (2)'s head
- 01:38:481 (2) - nazi but consistent spacing is better imo with move to 240,48
- 01:39:547 (6) - 01:44:342 - clap? no, cuz hitsound pattern = clap finish clap finish on every big white tick.
- 01:40:346 (2) - basically same as 01:37:148 (2) -
- 01:58:995 - volume should be 65% like first kiai buffed all kiai's volume to 80%
- 02:02:725 (3) - whistle on head? like 01:54:199 -
- 02:07:188 (5) - nazi but spacing on stream can be more consistent 2px adjust orz
- 02:11:118 (2,3) - if they are supposed for blanket, the blanket could be better
- 02:29:235 (2) - nazi but spacing can be more consistent
- 02:31:366 (2) - i still can understand with follow piano but imo skip drum at this case is weird because you following all drums before and seem like you are mapping based on drum especially at 02:23:507 - this part i think 1/1 is better here to follow and highlight piano. i do this because this is only time piano is this loud (by my interpretation at least, if there is other comparable place i may be wrong) and there is no vocal like 02:30:301 (2) -
- 02:33:897 (4,1) - the symmetrical can be better and not making symmetrical look weird based on ur design
- 02:41:090 (3) - having straight flow after a linear flow from 02:40:558 (1,2) - and linear again after that is weird imo, try ctrl+g instead to fix the flow?
- 02:41:756 (5) - just curious why jump in weak music
- 02:53:879 (1) - the flow is weird too imo because sudden change from 02:53:346 (5,6) - , how about ctrl+g this and then move 02:54:278 (2) - to 336,160? did something
- 02:58:674 (4,1) - i would say swap nc, see nc for the music is ok but break the consistent is weird especially 02:58:674 (4,5,1,2) - is a pattern
- 03:07:732 - also kinda weird to me, first kiai and second kiai are literally same but why SV changes are different here? (one with 1,4x the other one with 1,5x) tbh when i was mapping, i put it to 1.5 cuz i was gonna do 1.4 1.5 then 1.8 for last kiai but mapping with that high with my style on last one was really hard so i lowered it lol.. i will just make 2nd one 1.4 too.
- 03:24:251 (3) - both head and tail are strong drum, how about change them to 2 circles? at least it would make sense like 01:58:462 (3,4,5,6) -
- 03:27:981 (1) - 360,100 for symmetrical with (3)
- 03:32:243 (1) - at least i hear a cymbal, how about finish? it gives nice emphasis for last note as well
- 03:44:898 (7) - stack can be better
- 04:13:806 (1) - move to 224,208 so spacing gap of 04:13:806 (1,2,3,4) - is consistent
- 04:28:726 (1) - add whistle because it sounds nicely added amazing whistle spam everywhere xd
- 04:57:900 (4) - nazi, 284,360 for better blanket
- so ur kiai volume are too slow. ones are 48%, i saw 55% too and 65%. i hope you can make them more consistent (i personally prefer use 70% btw)
- and idk maybe its only me but i cant understand how your stacking are working here and yeah there are some flow which are weird imo so need to hear ur opinion about that


about my stacking
Outside of Kiai time, I focused very heavily on drums, not following vocals that much. I used stacking whenever there was 2 drum hits, and then later when the drum became a lot quieter, 2 claps and a stack. 00:57:584 (2,3) - for example, has 2 drum hits so I used a stack there. 00:59:582 (2,3,4,5) - all the same. I used claps later to create "fake" rhythm where there isn't really a clear emphasis to avoid making the map turn into pure 1/2 jump spam. Stacking is used consistently for clap+clap drum+drum sounds in the intro to get the player used to hearing the drum sounds and a stack on that, so that later on in the map I can stack with drum sounds that I add to add another layer to the song. Please let me know if this explanation isn't sufficient, but I think that this justification is fine considering that without the stacking pattern my entire map would be 1/2 sharp angle jumps with no variety.
Xinely
00:14:156 - add circle here since the music is strong and clearly hear in 100% speed, for consistency with 00:14:822 (5,6) - too
01:27:291 - miss clap
03:24:251 (3) - nazi, since prev slider is a straight slider, imo if you make straight flow to catch this, it looks neater (aka move to 100,48)
03:31:711 (3,4) - how about give jump to catch this (3) and give lower jump for (4)? since drum at 3 is strong and sound at 4 is weaker than 3

stack reason makes sense for me ok

anyway make sure first about metadata
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori

Xinely wrote:

00:14:156 - add circle here since the music is strong and clearly hear in 100% speed, for consistency with 00:14:822 (5,6) - too i don't hear new music box note, sure there is small ticking sound but that is on all red ticks so i prefer to ignore it and only take stronger music box notes
01:27:291 - miss clap
03:24:251 (3) - nazi, since prev slider is a straight slider, imo if you make straight flow to catch this, it looks neater (aka move to 100,48)
03:31:711 (3,4) - how about give jump to catch this (3) and give lower jump for (4)? since drum at 3 is strong and sound at 4 is weaker than 3

stack reason makes sense for me ok

anyway make sure first about metadata
i'll call after metadata then.
Xinely
ok looks much better for me so #1
Garden
General
  1. Unused hitsounds: normal-sliderslide.wav
Transcience<- i thought this was a mispell.. ?
  1. 00:19:884 - 00:21:483 - 00:23:082 - etc. why not add whistle to vocal like 00:24:680 - , just a bit concerned about the inconsistency there
  2. 00:45:462 - to 00:53:987 - I wonder why in the first half the main melody was dealt with soft-whistles while the other half was normal-whistles, and so was slider head samples
  3. 02:14:981 - ^
  4. 01:06:110 (3,4) - the spacing looks a bit larger than other similar stacks lol
  5. 01:37:148 (2) - unsnapped slider end
  6. 01:51:535 (1) - weird drum sample on the slider body
  7. 02:48:284 - whistle? same as 02:47:485 (3,3) - slider heads
  8. 02:55:744 (2,3,4) - 02:57:875 (1,2,3) - 02:58:807 (2,4,5) - etc. imo using some more hitsounding to follow the interesting instruments there would be cool
  9. 03:00:806 (3) - what about ctrl-g here? making 03:00:806 (3,1) - 03:01:605 (3,1) - same movement
  10. 03:03:470 - 03:05:601 (1) - finish?
  11. 03:03:470 (1) - ctrl-< the shape can make the movement much smoother, maybe give it a try
  12. 03:05:068 - maybe drumclap?
  13. 03:11:462 (3,4) - make it up and down movement so it's consistent with most of kiai? https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/7596222
  14. 04:04:214 (1) - 04:07:411 (1) - 04:17:003 (1) - add whistle to slider head? goes well with vocal when theres not a cymbol there
  15. 04:06:612 (2,4) - should be clap refering to 04:05:013 (2,4) - 04:08:211 (2,4) -
  16. 04:14:871 (3,4) - clap too?
  17. 04:32:456 - should be a whistle according to how u whistled latter vocals
  18. 04:45:245 (1) - it's really hard to expect how many times it will reverse, i suggest https://puu.sh/uOFcx/4ec6ccd901.png so it's more intuitive and ez to catch
  19. 05:10:288 (3,4,1) - rearrange spacing here so the emphasis could be laid on 05:10:821 - ? also imo it would be good if you make 05:10:821 (1,2,3,4) - spacing gradually smaller as a transition to the section where rhythm is less dense
  20. 05:27:871 (3) - can add a finish too
  21. in the last section i feel the placement of objects is pretty random, use obvious spacing like 05:12:285 (2,3,1) - or stack things for the gap variation would make it neater imo
not bad, i can repair bubble ;)
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori

Garden wrote:

General
  1. Unused hitsounds: normal-sliderslide.wav fixed
Transcience<- i thought this was a mispell.. ? it's my style
  1. 00:19:884 - 00:21:483 - 00:23:082 - etc. why not add whistle to vocal like 00:24:680 - , just a bit concerned about the inconsistency there added whistle everywhere
  2. 00:45:462 - to 00:53:987 - I wonder why in the first half the main melody was dealt with soft-whistles while the other half was normal-whistles, and so was slider head samples i don't understand what you mean
  3. 02:14:981 - ^
  4. 01:06:110 (3,4) - the spacing looks a bit larger than other similar stacks lol
  5. 01:37:148 (2) - unsnapped slider end
  6. 01:51:535 (1) - weird drum sample on the slider body
  7. 02:48:284 - whistle? same as 02:47:485 (3,3) - slider heads added
  8. 02:55:744 (2,3,4) - 02:57:875 (1,2,3) - 02:58:807 (2,4,5) - etc. imo using some more hitsounding to follow the interesting instruments there would be cool i don't see an issue here, can you elaborate on what you mean?
  9. 03:00:806 (3) - what about ctrl-g here? making 03:00:806 (3,1) - 03:01:605 (3,1) - same movement adjusted
  10. 03:03:470 - 03:05:601 (1) - finish?
  11. 03:03:470 (1) - ctrl-< the shape can make the movement much smoother, maybe give it a try ya
  12. 03:05:068 - maybe drumclap? added
  13. 03:11:462 (3,4) - make it up and down movement so it's consistent with most of kiai? https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/7596222 changed
  14. 04:04:214 (1) - 04:07:411 (1) - 04:17:003 (1) - add whistle to slider head? goes well with vocal when theres not a cymbol there added whistles
  15. 04:06:612 (2,4) - should be clap refering to 04:05:013 (2,4) - 04:08:211 (2,4) - yes
  16. 04:14:871 (3,4) - clap too? 4 clap
  17. 04:32:456 - should be a whistle according to how u whistled latter vocals
  18. 04:45:245 (1) - it's really hard to expect how many times it will reverse, i suggest https://puu.sh/uOFcx/4ec6ccd901.png so it's more intuitive and ez to catch changed basically
  19. 05:10:288 (3,4,1) - rearrange spacing here so the emphasis could be laid on 05:10:821 - ? also imo it would be good if you make 05:10:821 (1,2,3,4) - spacing gradually smaller as a transition to the section where rhythm is less dense don't think it is needed to reduce spacing since i use similar spacing on the part after it and i would need to reduce there too
  20. 05:27:871 (3) - can add a finish too added
  21. in the last section i feel the placement of objects is pretty random, use obvious spacing like 05:12:285 (2,3,1) - or stack things for the gap variation would make it neater imo i think last part is fine, since rhythm is pretty disjointed i just made placements based on visual spacing and slowly decrease spacing. if it's problem i could rework but i don't see that big of an issue here.
not bad, i can repair bubble ;)
Monstrata
Salutations!

Transience

00:19:085 (1,2,3,4) - Spacings are inconsistent structurally.
00:19:085 (1) - Also, for sliders like this, you can use the slider-ball at the mid-point of the slider to make these more symemtrical:
00:23:881 (1) - Use the same slider as 00:23:082 (2) - but rotate it 90 degrees instead? Gives more consistency to the designs. Right now theyre slightly different in shape and angle.
00:42:797 (4) - Linear slider would fit the general slider shapes you've been using with this combo and the next.
00:52:922 (1,2,3) - Consistent spacing?
00:53:454 (3,4) - Here too, unless your intention was reducing spacing (then disregard previous comment)
01:04:245 (4,5,1) - Slider 1 is set up in a way as to blanket 4+5, but the pattern isn't symmetrical as it can be.
01:09:973 (1,2,3,4,5,1) - Could polish up the structure here too.
01:26:758 (5) - This slider is a bit too close to 01:26:358 (3) - in terms of visual structure.
01:28:890 (5) - Move it a bit more left. Basically, take 01:28:357 (2,4) - , copy/paste and use that as a reference point to improve the structure here.
01:49:404 (1,1,1) - If you care, the spacing here is slightly off, and its visible in game.
01:55:265 (3,2) - Stacks
02:07:521 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - For this section, you could switch up the NC patterning to emphasize the vocal rhythm instead. Basically, NC on 02:08:320 - 02:09:119 - 02:09:919 - Instead. You probably subconsciously went with this pattern anyways, considering how you chose your rhythm, when you decided to use 1/1 sliders, and why you made 02:09:652 (1,2,3,4) - different slider designs.
02:13:915 (1,2) - Copy/paste stack for 02:14:981 (1) - for a more even spacing?
02:24:040 - 02:26:171 - I would recommend mapping these (even if to slider-ends) because the vocal + instrumental layer is so similar that even if you're following instrument, its easy for ppl to think you're following vocal and miss here. In any case, you already map the instrument layer well with how you handle sliders vs circles. Using a slider-end helps to curb the gap that people might expect to be clickable, and it will also demonstrate that you are mapping primarily for instrument (without jeopardizing vocal layer).
02:31:366 (2,3) - Blanket here
02:35:230 (1) - Imo, either do a perfectly symmetrical blanket, or have the bend 3/4ths of the way through the slider. They look the most recognizable, visually.
03:15:192 (1,2) - Make them symmetrical instead?
03:17:057 (5,1) - Curve blanket could be neater.
03:48:894 (3,4) - I don't think a stack is a good idea here, especially considering the downbeat that 4 is on.
03:55:688 (3,4,1) - Spacing could be more even
03:56:754 (3,4,5) - ^
03:57:287 (5,6,1) - ^ Use copy pasta here or something. Or use decimal snap divisor if you need to Hold Alt + Shift + Scroll to toggle distance snap to 2 decimal places instead of 1.
04:08:477 (3,4,1) -
04:14:605 (2,3,4) - Spacing is slightly inconsistent here too.
04:30:857 (1,2,3) - Spacing
04:45:777 (1) - No spacing increase to 0.95 here? you changed from 0.75 to 0.85 for 04:44:712 (1,1) -
04:48:708 (2,4) - Were these supposed to stack? better to move 04:48:708 (2) - since shifting 04:49:374 (4) - means shifting 209384023 other objects.
04:53:770 (1,3) - Blanket is off.
05:00:165 (1) - Man. Ctrl+G flows so much better and doesn't create reading problems ;c/
05:06:824 (3) - NC here , consistency with 05:05:226 (1) -
05:08:689 (3) - NC here too since you're NC"ing every measure.
05:15:083 (4,6) - Blankets off
05:17:481 (1,2,3,4) - See if you can improve the structure here? at least with 2>3>4 being more consistent?
05:18:280 (1,2,3) - Maybe try some arrangement like this so people don't get spacing confused due to 05:19:079 (1) - being 1/1 away.
05:23:875 (1,3,4) - You could make them perfectly linear, would make the pattern more consistent

[]

Sorry for the delay xd.
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori
Oh my Lord

00:52:922 (1,2,3) - Consistent spacing?
00:53:454 (3,4) - Here too, unless your intention was reducing spacing (then disregard previous comment)
spacing decrease, made it go down by .15 each time.

04:45:777 (1) - No spacing increase to 0.95 here? you changed from 0.75 to 0.85 for 04:44:712 (1,1) - didnt add sv here because the first change has a louder guitar coming in, 2nd one it's just another guitar that isn't tooooo much louder. my interpretation at least.

05:00:165 (1) - Man. Ctrl+G flows so much better and doesn't create reading problems ;c/ actually here i disagree, it changes the cursor movement which is very rotational at this moment and in the next few patterns. i haven't seen anyone actually misread this either.

05:18:280 (1,2,3) - Maybe try some arrangement like this so people don't get spacing confused due to 05:19:079 (1) - being 1/1 away. nobody misreads this either since i've been setting up the 1/2 > 1/1 equal spacing/patterning/visual spacing thing for a while now.
Monstrata
Rebubble #1
Garden
#2
Xinely
did recheck and here we go
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori
Thanks guys!
Haruto
Congratss nao!
Vivyanne
03:13:594 (3,2,4) - nao why is this stack inconsistent
yes i did listen to the music for as to where you would put certain overlapping patterns but that isn't justified here
Feerum
Disqualified on Mappers request to fix that thing above
Topic Starter
Nao Tomori
fixed, thanks for modding!
Feerum
Since this was really just a minor fix here's your heart back.
Shoutoshi
grats of qualify good stuff good stuff
anna apple

Feerum wrote:

Since this was really just a minor fix here's your heart back.
gratz nao



















boogie woogie
Lily Bread
wa gratz!
Voxnola
Gratz on rank, sis ^-^
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