Junpei Fujita - Deadlock · forum

Electoz

Joined May 2015

Electoz 2017-03-31T04:25:01+00:00

[Hobbes2's Normal]

00:04:335 (2,3,4,1) - Looks so dense compared with everything else around that part.
00:14:543 (2,3) - Stacks don't really play well when the below object is weaker than the top.
00:28:710 (1) - That long slider is not really necessary imo, how about something like this?
00:37:877 (2) - These are totally different than 00:36:418 (2,3,1) so the rhythm here should be different, imo even 2 circles here is still reasonable as you can discern different sounds with different rhythms.
00:55:168 (1,1) - Not sure why these aesthetics are intended like this when other things are pretty much a different style.
01:09:335 - This would be more significant to map than 01:09:127 imo
01:11:418 (4,1,2,3) - [url=puu.sh/v43Sn/aa4ba50287.PNG]This[/url] would be a lot more interesting to map tbh. Well you can use sliders instead of circles, but you get my point.

The song is too chaotic to the point where we need to pin the rhythms down before going any further.

[Yahuri's Advanced]

01:07:861 (3,1) - Why suddenly a 1/1 gap when you didn't do this anywhere earlier zz
Overall I disagree your rhythm choices as they focused too much on minor sounds to the point where they lose emphasizes on the more important ones or even the main melody, like:
1. 00:01:194 would be more emphasized with a hold sound while 00:01:402 is really minor and not necessarily need to be mapped.
2. 01:20:361 (1) - The rhythm here is slightly different from 01:19:528 (3,4) so the way it was represented should be different too, I would use a 1/1 slider+circle instead of 01:20:361 (1,2) .
3. Et cetera, I can point more things out but it would just being me telling my own interpretation of the song so there's that.

[Juicy]

00:00:361 (1,2) - 00:02:444 (2,3,4) - Not sure why you treated these differently despite being the same sound.
00:14:111 (2) - Could be 2 circles as these beats are equally prominent.
00:16:819 (4,5,6) - The stack doesn't play really well since the most prominent thing is 00:16:819 (4) and it's on top so there isn't any much emphasis on it, technically it should be at the bottom of the stack so something like this would prioritize the beats better according to their importance.
00:17:236 (7,8) - Should be changed to a 1/4 slider with a similar stack reasoning as above.
00:19:319 (2,3,4) - The pattern is arranged with 3 sliders but 00:19:319 (2) - is not musically the same as 00:19:736 (3,4) .
00:22:444 (1,2,3,4) - Like, there should be a better placement than this because stacking 00:22:444 (1,4) doesn’t reflect anything related to the song, the pattern would make more sense if they’re arranged in the way that 4 sliders are visually related, currently 00:24:319 (4) looks so random.
00:24:944 (5,1) - And these aren't rhythmically the same as 00:22:444 (1,2,3,4) anymore so it should be sth different than just repeating the flow with similar placements.
00:30:777 (3,4,6) - Don't stack reverse arrow pls.
Tbh overall the diff lacks structure, some patterns aren't really executed in a way that they could reflect the song properly, rhythms can be improved more too imo. I also would like to know if you have any reasoning/concept behind your spacings, because I don't understand some stuff you did like 00:12:236 (2,3,4) - 00:21:611 (2,3) - etc and idk if you have any solid reasoning/concept behind these.

Also the song at some point has 1/6 snaps but I don't feel like figuring them out zz

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-03-31T05:02:07+00:00

instrumental mapping is rip

Electoz wrote:
[Yahuri's Advanced]
01:07:861 (3,1) - Why suddenly a 1/1 gap when you didn't do this anywhere earlier zz i just felt like there wasnt anything worth mapping here xd
Overall I disagree your rhythm choices as they focused too much on minor sounds to the point where they lose emphasizes on the more important ones or even the main melody, like:
00:01:194 would be more emphasized with a hold sound while 00:01:402 is really minor and not necessarily need to be mapped. ok
01:20:361 (1) - The rhythm here is slightly different from 01:19:528 (3,4) so the way it was represented should be different too, I would use a 1/1 slider+circle instead of 01:20:361 (1,2) . in both cases, the first slider has a finish and the second slider has a clap. i tried showing the rhythm difference in piano by using straight vs curved sliders.
Et cetera, I can point more things out but it would just being me telling my own interpretation of the song so there's that.

i'll continue working on cutting down note density and whatever, but no changes yet

Sotarks

3,493 posts

Joined May 2014

Sotarks 2017-04-02T11:02:43+00:00

[General]

missing combo colors try those :

[Colours]
Combo1 : 140,140,140
Combo2 : 124,175,233
Combo3 : 89,192,71

AIMod :
Adding GDers to tags!
Why there's no hitsounds?

[Juicy]
00:20:569 (5) - consider unstack and maybe move it to x403 y178
00:20:778 (1) - why? like you skipping beats here
00:53:486 (5) - please make this shape more even it's fcking ugly
01:06:611 (4) - more spacing please for this loud downbeat thx
[]
can't find anything on lower diffs..
gl

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-04-19T06:18:01+00:00

more nerfing xd

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 1
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13694,27027
DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 8
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Advanced
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game
BeatmapID:1252032
BeatmapSetID:527942

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:6
CircleSize:4
OverallDifficulty:6
ApproachRate:8
SliderMultiplier:1.6
SliderTickRate:2

[Events]
//Background and Video events
0,0,"0020.jpg",0,0
//Break Periods
//Storyboard Layer 0 (Background)
//Storyboard Layer 1 (Fail)
//Storyboard Layer 2 (Pass)
//Storyboard Layer 3 (Foreground)
//Storyboard Sound Samples

[TimingPoints]
361,416.666666666667,4,2,1,40,1,0
92027,-100,4,2,1,20,0,0
92861,-100,4,2,1,10,0,0
93694,-100,4,2,1,5,0,0


[Colours]
Combo1 : 87,203,253
Combo2 : 64,149,64
Combo3 : 95,125,248
Combo4 : 125,215,125

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de-nerf mod

01:04:527 (4) raise kiai difficulty
make jumps -> 1.5x DS

de-nerfed code

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 1
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13694,27027
DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 8
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Advanced
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game
BeatmapID:1252032
BeatmapSetID:527942

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:6
CircleSize:4
OverallDifficulty:6
ApproachRate:8
SliderMultiplier:1.6
SliderTickRate:2

[Events]
//Background and Video events
0,0,"0020.jpg",0,0
//Break Periods
//Storyboard Layer 0 (Background)
//Storyboard Layer 1 (Fail)
//Storyboard Layer 2 (Pass)
//Storyboard Layer 3 (Foreground)
//Storyboard Sound Samples

[TimingPoints]
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60361,-100,4,2,1,40,0,1
91819,-100,4,2,1,40,0,0
92027,-100,4,2,1,20,0,0
92861,-100,4,2,1,10,0,0
93694,-100,4,2,1,5,0,0


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Combo2 : 64,149,64
Combo3 : 95,125,248
Combo4 : 125,215,125

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256,192,92028,12,0,93694,0:0:0:0:

idk to wat extent u want me to increase the rhythm difficulty but i did some stuff

ne0ku

38 posts

Joined May 2015

ne0ku 2017-05-01T00:24:50+00:00

~~Hello there!~~ Hi! From #modreqs

I had a look at Angelic and there is really not a lot to change. But there are a few maybe's that you could check.

Angelic

00:56:402 (3) - Ctrl + g? Keeps consistency with the slider at 00:54:736 (1) - and also goes nicely with the lower note in the song as it's a downwards facing slider.

01:26:611 (5) - Ctrl + g? Feels more fluent, but I know you're trying to keep consistent with other sliders that are the same.

This is weird, ~~I know~~

Your beatmaps background involves a guy riding the bike at what seems a fast pace, and considering your map and song isn't the fastest, maybe you wanna change it? I know backgrounds don't really mean much but still, worth mentioning.

Sorry that I didn't add much, but I cannot see anything that wrong. Angelic seems by far good enough to be ranked, so I wish you luck!

- neoku

defiance

503 posts

Joined July 2015

defiance 2017-05-01T00:49:19+00:00

nao tomori.

General

y does the advanced have a kiai and not the other diffs

Hobbes diff has conflicting tags, a different offseT

get some combo colors nao owo

you should like make the bg max rankable size, http://waifu2x.udp.jp/

Hobbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz normal

barely curved sliders are SEX

nice

Yahuri's Advanced

yheja this is p good 2 lmao

Angelic

here is a stack mod for ya

00:07:861 (3) - Is This Supposed To Be Stacked

00:13:902 (1) - god is dead

00:45:152 (1) - nao pls

00:54:111 (2) - pls

01:00:777 (2) - grate osu mapping skills

Good Luck Nao Tomori

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-05-01T04:41:56+00:00

ya

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 1
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13694,27027
DistanceSpacing: 1.5
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 8
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Advanced
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game yahuri hobbes2
BeatmapID:1252032
BeatmapSetID:527942

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:6
CircleSize:4
OverallDifficulty:6
ApproachRate:7
SliderMultiplier:1.6
SliderTickRate:2

[Events]
//Background and Video events
0,0,"0020.jpg",0,0
//Break Periods
//Storyboard Layer 0 (Background)
//Storyboard Layer 1 (Fail)
//Storyboard Layer 2 (Pass)
//Storyboard Layer 3 (Foreground)
//Storyboard Sound Samples

[TimingPoints]
361,416.666666666667,4,2,1,40,1,0
60361,-100,4,2,1,40,0,1
91819,-100,4,2,1,40,0,0
92027,-100,4,2,1,20,0,0
92861,-100,4,2,1,10,0,0
93694,-100,4,2,1,5,0,0


[Colours]
Combo1 : 87,203,253
Combo2 : 64,149,64
Combo3 : 95,125,248
Combo4 : 125,215,125

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anna apple

1,245 posts

Joined March 2014

anna apple 2017-05-01T05:55:00+00:00

irc

2017-04-30 22:34 pyroflayer: 00:16:611 (3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10) - 
2017-04-30 22:42 pyroflayer: 01:14:736 (4,5,1) - 
2017-04-30 22:46 pyroflayer: yahuri -> remap kds pls
2017-04-30 22:46 pyroflayer: hobbes2 -> gj
2017-04-30 22:46 pyroflayer: LOL
2017-04-30 22:46 Naotoshi: o
2017-04-30 22:46 Naotoshi: k
2017-04-30 22:47 pyroflayer: problem for me is, yahuri has the option for a bit more diversity in rhyth, but then choses to swap between two instruments a bit too frequently without real reason to in attempt to map everything 
2017-04-30 22:47 pyroflayer: or at least it seems that way
2017-04-30 22:47 Naotoshi: mm
2017-04-30 22:47 Naotoshi: my diff does same  thing
2017-04-30 22:47 Naotoshi: the song lends itself to that
2017-04-30 22:48 pyroflayer: eh
2017-04-30 22:48 pyroflayer: but you do it better
2017-04-30 22:48 Naotoshi: hm
2017-04-30 22:49 pyroflayer: like 00:00:361 (1,2,3,4) -  and 00:03:694 (1,2,3) - are the same musicallyu
2017-04-30 22:50 pyroflayer: well at least from the synth'd piano
2017-04-30 22:51 Naotoshi: i see what you mean
2017-04-30 22:51 Naotoshi: ok
2017-04-30 22:51 pyroflayer: but uh
2017-04-30 22:51 pyroflayer: (fuk this song tbh)
2017-04-30 22:52 Naotoshi: yea lol
2017-04-30 22:52 pyroflayer: i don't wanna say much else cuz feeling a little sick rn 
2017-04-30 22:52 Naotoshi: np
2017-04-30 22:52 Naotoshi: feel better
2017-04-30 22:52 pyroflayer: thank :^)

also mentioned was no bg on hobbes after bg switch

sorry for the flame

Yukiyo

425 posts

Joined June 2014

Yukiyo 2017-05-01T12:41:52+00:00

Hello love this song so I did some stuff C:
Can't really mod Normal sorry ^^"
Nao is god

[yahuri's advanced]
gonna talk about rhythm choice in the map here

00:03:694 (1,2,3) - and 00:00:361 (1,2,3,4) - are musically identical, how come they are mapped so differently?

00:08:277 (5,1) - i think this rhythm choice could be improved.
a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vBY5q/4e37283a90.jpg starting at 00:08:277 - follows the melody piano better. your current rhythm places it on a slider end then reverts to mapping the ostinato piano , which takes emphasis off of the held out note unnecessarily.
additionally, ctrl g on 00:09:111 (2,3) - has the same effect of following the piano and allowing the melody to be clickable.
00:09:944 (4) - having this as a 1/1 slider puts a really strong note that has a trill leading up to it on a slider end as well, leading up to 00:10:569 (1) - a weaker note being clickable. overall not the best way to go about things.

00:15:152 (6,1) - here i also suggest replacing these with a 1/1 slider. 00:15:152 - is basically a quieter progression of the note at 00:14:527 - so following it the same way makes sense.

00:21:402 (4,1) - here i believe placing 4 at 00:21:611 - works better since it follows that main string melody. the red tick rhythm here is really quiet and not worth doing imo.

00:32:653 (2) - doesn't it make sense to put a 1/1 slider here? it'd follow the loud piano a bit better imo.

00:33:694 (1,2,3,4) - i'd advise a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vC1nv/7b95a02b54.jpg to follow the chimes a bit more closely.

00:36:402 (2,4) - imo it isn't that important to follow all the quiet snare shit here, just putting 1/1 circles on the piano could create a nice effect like at 00:37:027 (1,2) - .

01:03:694 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - imo a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vC1CO/2f1ff86e3a.jpg suits the build up better. having a 1/1 space seems anticlimactic to me.

mostly focused on intro cuz thats where the song is a shitty ass clusterfuck of random sounds, kiai is fine

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-05-02T00:51:18+00:00

Yukiyo wrote:
Hello love this song so I did some stuff C:
Can't really mod Normal sorry ^^"
Nao is god

[yahuri's advanced]
gonna talk about rhythm choice in the map here

00:03:694 (1,2,3) - and 00:00:361 (1,2,3,4) - are musically identical, how come they are mapped so differently? ?? the pitches are different, the pattern here 00:00:361 (1,2) contains drums as well. 00:03:902 - is much weaker than the other iteration. 00:04:111 (2) - i could switch this into 1/2 + circle though, but 00:04:527 is still weaker than the other iteration imo

00:08:277 (5,1) - i think this rhythm choice could be improved.
a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vBY5q/4e37283a90.jpg starting at 00:08:277 - follows the melody piano better. your current rhythm places it on a slider end then reverts to mapping the ostinato piano , which takes emphasis off of the held out note unnecessarily.
additionally, ctrl g on 00:09:111 (2,3) - has the same effect of following the piano and allowing the melody to be clickable.
00:09:944 (4) - having this as a 1/1 slider puts a really strong note that has a trill leading up to it on a slider end as well, leading up to 00:10:569 (1) - a weaker note being clickable. overall not the best way to go about things. my original intention was to map it out like a weird slider so that there's still a hold/emphasis throughout the trill anyways, fixed to the rhythm in the picture

00:15:152 (6,1) - here i also suggest replacing these with a 1/1 slider. 00:15:152 - is basically a quieter progression of the note at 00:14:527 - so following it the same way makes sense. i hear it. nice catch

00:21:402 (4,1) - here i believe placing 4 at 00:21:611 - works better since it follows that main string melody. the red tick rhythm here is really quiet and not worth doing imo. wew guess i missed the strings entrance

00:32:653 (2) - doesn't it make sense to put a 1/1 slider here? it'd follow the loud piano a bit better imo. i want to map the drums as well

00:33:694 (1,2,3,4) - i'd advise a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vC1nv/7b95a02b54.jpg to follow the chimes a bit more closely. i guess nao fixed this for me already lmao i dont remember what i had before

00:36:402 (2,4) - imo it isn't that important to follow all the quiet snare shit here, just putting 1/1 circles on the piano could create a nice effect like at 00:37:027 (1,2) - . the thing is, i also hear a bunch of piano glissando stuff and whatever around 2 and 4, so deleting those would completely miss that stuff. then putting another circle here 00:37:236 would just be a lot of circles at once xd

01:03:694 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - imo a rhythm like http://puu.sh/vC1CO/2f1ff86e3a.jpg suits the build up better. having a 1/1 space seems anticlimactic to me. good point, fixed

mostly focused on intro cuz thats where the song is a shitty ass clusterfuck yes of random sounds, kiai is fine

Thanks!
00:49:944 (4) - still kinda sounds like a ghost note
00:57:027 (1) - same

asdkjasd

osu file format v14

[General]
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AudioLeadIn: 0
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[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Advanced
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game yahuri hobbes2
BeatmapID:1252032
BeatmapSetID:527942

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Swell

119 posts

Joined October 2013

Swell 2017-05-06T03:43:47+00:00

Hobbes2

ugly sliders

Yahuri

00:03:694 (1,2,3) - Just want some clarification on this rhythm. Just seems odd that you're mapping the music box riff at first and then don't follow it the second time it comes around.

00:20:777 (3,4,5) - This really kills momentum I think when you were mapping so densely before. But I'm not sure if there's much if you can do about it.

00:56:402 (3,1) - strong sound on slider end I'd either go something like https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/8011880 or place a note on each red tick

Angelic

00:13:277 (2,3) - so I guess my only issue is that this 1/2 has about as big of spacing as your 1/1s later in the map. While 1/2 rhythms mapped to similar sounds are given significantly less spacing.

00:38:486 (5) - this doesn't matter as much but I'd like this much better as a stream more than a multireverse

01:06:611 (5,6) - same thing here I guess. 5,6 have the same tone so they should be the same spacing as the last 4 sliders. The following NC is where the piano has a sudden loud chord so you could make the jump there instead.

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-05-06T11:12:53+00:00

Swell wrote:
Yahuri

00:03:694 (1,2,3) - Just want some clarification on this rhythm. Just seems odd that you're mapping the music box riff at first and then don't follow it the second time it comes around. not mapping the note here 00:03:902 because its very soft compared to the first iteration. the notes here 00:04:111 (2,3) are a bit more audible, so i switched it into 1/2 + circle

00:20:777 (3,4,5) - This really kills momentum I think when you were mapping so densely before. But I'm not sure if there's much if you can do about it. added circle here 00:21:402

00:56:402 (3,1) - strong sound on slider end I'd either go something like https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/8011880 or place a note on each red tick seems better, ill use it

Thanks!

did some additional volume stuffs and switched out some slider shapes

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 1
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13694,27027
DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 8
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Hard
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game yahuri hobbes2
BeatmapID:1252032
BeatmapSetID:527942

[Difficulty]
HPDrainRate:6
CircleSize:4
OverallDifficulty:6
ApproachRate:7
SliderMultiplier:1.6
SliderTickRate:2

[Events]
//Background and Video events
0,0,"707279.png",0,0
//Break Periods
//Storyboard Layer 0 (Background)
//Storyboard Layer 1 (Fail)
//Storyboard Layer 2 (Pass)
//Storyboard Layer 3 (Foreground)
//Storyboard Sound Samples

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13694,-100,4,2,1,22,0,0
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295,362,20777,2,0,B|216:371|216:371|138:348,1,160,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
63,320,21402,1,0,0:0:0:0:
109,254,21611,2,0,P|131:178|123:99,1,160
281,122,22444,6,0,B|356:154|360:104|437:134,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
471,206,23069,2,0,B|464:286|464:286|457:334|417:348,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
347,314,23694,6,0,B|290:300|229:325|229:325|188:314,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
117,283,24319,2,0,P|110:321|123:358,2,80,2|0|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
181,235,24944,1,2,0:0:0:0:
147,162,25153,6,0,L|132:-3,1,160,8|0,3:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
211,19,25777,2,0,P|249:26|286:13,2,80,2|2|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
133,2,26402,2,0,P|95:-5|58:8,2,80
158,78,27027,6,0,P|151:116|164:153,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
230,199,27444,1,4,0:0:0:0:
297,155,27653,1,2,0:0:0:0:
364,199,27861,1,0,0:0:0:0:
431,155,28069,2,0,B|454:79|454:79|445:-1,1,160
374,37,28694,6,0,P|337:50|299:44,1,80
222,71,29111,2,0,P|183:63|145:77,1,80
69,218,29736,1,2,0:0:0:0:
134,264,29944,1,2,0:0:0:0:
198,310,30152,6,0,P|235:323|274:316,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
346,281,30569,1,8,0:3:0:0:
312,208,30778,2,0,B|307:168|307:168|331:93|331:93|327:52,1,160,8|8,0:3|0:3,0:0:0:0:
254,18,31402,2,0,B|215:21|215:21|181:47|141:51|141:51|99:40,2,160,2|2|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
327,52,32444,5,2,0:0:0:0:
295,125,32653,1,2,0:0:0:0:
329,197,32861,2,0,P|343:234|336:273,1,80,4|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
297,343,33278,1,4,0:3:0:0:
223,311,33486,1,4,0:3:0:0:
150,344,33694,6,0,P|112:352|75:338,1,80,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
52,260,34111,1,0,0:0:0:0:
77,184,34319,2,0,L|57:97,1,80
129,66,34736,2,0,B|205:89|205:89|285:80,1,160
353,123,35361,6,0,B|393:106|416:75|416:75|399:38|361:16,2,160,2|0|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
285,80,36402,1,0,0:0:0:0:
225,132,36611,1,2,0:0:0:0:
257,206,36819,1,0,0:0:0:0:
336,199,37027,5,2,0:0:0:0:
440,320,37444,2,0,P|409:385|344:354,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
342,274,38069,2,0,P|349:235|335:198,1,80
291,130,38486,6,0,B|254:120|254:120|213:130|213:130|175:118|175:118|137:130|137:130|99:119|99:119|60:129,1,240,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
34,287,39527,1,0,0:0:0:0:
103,328,39736,1,2,0:0:0:0:
166,279,39944,1,2,0:0:0:0:
230,328,40153,1,2,0:0:0:0:
293,279,40361,6,0,L|307:196,1,80,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
273,128,40777,2,0,L|258:45,1,80,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
186,13,41194,1,4,0:3:0:0:
114,48,41402,2,0,B|98:83|98:83|101:163|101:163|87:201,1,160,2|8,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
62,279,42028,5,4,0:3:0:0:
126,327,42236,1,4,0:3:0:0:
193,280,42444,1,2,0:0:0:0:
168,204,42652,2,4,B|156:123|205:132|196:50,2,160,4|4|2,0:3|0:3|0:0,0:3:0:0:
193,280,43694,6,0,L|275:294,1,80
344,260,44111,2,0,P|360:224|356:185,1,80,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
321,113,44527,2,0,P|317:73|335:38,1,80,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
408,5,44944,1,4,0:3:0:0:
466,61,45152,6,0,B|469:100|469:100|495:134|499:174|499:174|488:216,1,160,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
418,251,45777,2,0,P|378:247|343:265,1,80,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
297,330,46194,1,10,0:0:0:0:
265,257,46402,2,0,B|246:229|204:205|204:205|166:218|166:218|122:216,1,160,10|0,0:0|0:3,0:3:0:0:
52,186,47028,5,4,0:0:0:0:
65,265,47236,2,0,P|81:300|85:340,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
165,335,47653,2,0,P|202:348|233:374,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
286,313,48069,2,0,P|322:296|362:292,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
441,292,48486,6,0,B|432:252|432:252|449:175|449:175|442:135,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
410,62,49111,1,2,0:0:0:0:
363,127,49319,2,0,L|205:154,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
195,233,49944,1,0,0:0:0:0:
178,311,50152,6,0,P|120:261|130:185,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
142,107,50777,2,0,P|137:67|154:32,2,80,2|0|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
205,153,51402,2,0,B|258:176|323:162|323:162|361:180,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
496,97,52236,5,2,0:0:0:0:
462,24,52444,1,2,0:0:0:0:
390,60,52652,2,0,B|309:72|318:23|236:32,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
164,176,53486,6,0,B|125:179|125:179|51:148|51:148|10:149,2,160,0|0|2,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
241,197,54528,1,2,0:0:0:0:
299,142,54736,2,8,B|336:128|336:128|399:148|454:129,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
495,197,55361,6,8,P|511:232|506:271,1,80,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
433,306,55777,2,0,B|359:276|359:276|277:277,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
221,221,56402,2,0,L|235:138,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
245,62,56819,6,0,B|164:75|164:75|116:81|94:48,2,160,2|0|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:3:0:0:
325,60,57861,2,8,B|344:115|324:178|324:178|338:215,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
378,285,58486,6,0,B|300:311|300:261|221:284,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
148,317,59111,2,0,B|122:286|122:286|102:209|102:209|77:177,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
30,243,59736,2,0,P|-2:186|55:100,1,160,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
151,147,60361,6,0,B|190:148|190:148|226:126|267:128|267:128|302:106,1,160,6|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
369,64,60986,1,0,0:0:0:0:
388,142,61194,1,8,0:0:0:0:
320,184,61402,2,0,B|327:263|327:263|362:344,1,160
437,358,62028,5,0,0:0:0:0:
480,291,62236,2,0,P|496:254|500:214,1,80,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
466,143,62653,2,0,L|302:99,1,160
236,130,63278,1,10,0:0:0:0:
162,101,63486,1,8,0:0:0:0:
134,176,63694,5,2,0:0:0:0:
208,205,63902,1,8,0:0:0:0:
146,256,64111,2,0,P|150:295|166:332,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
243,352,64527,1,8,0:3:0:0:
320,331,64736,1,0,0:0:0:0:
371,269,64944,2,0,P|367:230|351:193,1,80,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
317,122,65361,6,0,L|238:101,1,80
166,134,65777,2,0,L|144:211,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
179,284,66194,2,0,L|257:305,1,80
330,271,66611,2,0,L|351:193,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
424,99,67027,5,6,0:0:0:0:
269,56,67444,2,0,P|251:91|249:132,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
254,212,67861,1,8,0:0:0:0:
182,177,68069,2,8,B|102:169|102:169|21:134,1,160,0|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
1,62,68694,5,0,0:0:0:0:
73,27,68902,2,8,B|152:34|152:34|233:69,2,160,8|0|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
1,62,69944,1,10,0:0:0:0:
67,107,70152,5,2,0:0:0:0:
67,187,70361,2,0,P|69:226|87:262,1,80
160,296,70778,2,0,B|201:296|201:296|272:334|272:334|312:336,1,160,2|10,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
387,358,71402,2,0,P|404:322|407:282,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
375,208,71819,1,2,0:0:0:0:
301,176,72027,5,2,0:0:0:0:
266,103,72236,1,10,0:0:0:0:
301,31,72444,2,0,P|338:19|378:22,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
431,82,72861,2,0,P|432:121|449:157,1,80,8|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
485,228,73278,2,0,P|481:267|465:304,1,80,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
426,374,73694,1,0,0:0:0:0:
386,304,73902,5,10,0:0:0:0:
312,336,74111,2,0,B|234:356|234:356|186:365|160:332,1,160,12|8,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
9,280,74944,2,0,P|10:240|28:204,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
109,205,75361,5,2,0:0:0:0:
188,205,75569,1,10,0:0:0:0:
149,135,75777,2,0,P|151:95|170:60,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
243,25,76194,2,0,P|282:27|317:46,2,80,2|2|0,0:0|0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
235,105,76819,6,0,B|230:186|278:173|276:255,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
334,311,77444,2,0,P|369:294|408:292,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
463,233,77861,1,10,0:0:0:0:
494,159,78069,1,2,0:0:0:0:
464,84,78278,1,2,0:0:0:0:
357,139,78486,6,0,B|282:164|282:164|236:163|212:119,1,160,6|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
174,55,79111,2,0,P|134:59|99:79,1,80,10|2,0:0|0:0,0:3:0:0:
35,181,79528,2,0,L|12:264,1,80,6|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
87,289,79944,2,0,L|110:372,1,80,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
161,258,80361,6,8,P|196:240|235:237,1,80,6|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
308,272,80777,2,8,P|325:307|328:346,1,80,10|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
252,373,81194,1,8,0:0:0:0:
178,340,81402,2,0,B|144:266|144:266|134:179,1,160
159,110,82027,6,0,L|182:27,1,80
337,66,82653,1,8,0:0:0:0:
369,139,82861,1,2,0:0:0:0:
337,212,83069,2,0,P|370:233|410:239,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
490,231,83486,1,2,0:0:0:0:
442,167,83694,6,0,P|402:160|369:139,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
292,117,84110,2,0,L|256:195,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
276,268,84527,1,8,0:0:0:0:
200,244,84735,2,0,P|160:245|125:264,1,80,2|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
48,357,85153,6,0,B|1:289|50:277|7:205,1,160,6|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
54,140,85778,2,0,P|89:122|129:119,1,80,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
204,149,86194,2,0,L|227:66,1,80,10|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
297,36,86611,2,0,L|374:57,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
444,152,87027,6,0,B|440:196|418:227|418:227|381:241|381:241|349:266,1,160,6|8,0:0|0:3,0:0:0:0:
289,320,87653,1,2,0:0:0:0:
235,259,87861,1,8,0:0:0:0:
296,205,88069,1,8,0:0:0:0:
263,131,88278,2,0,P|226:113|186:110,1,80,0|0,0:3|0:3,0:3:0:0:
108,116,88694,5,0,0:0:0:0:
48,169,88903,1,8,0:0:0:0:
79,285,89111,2,0,L|102:368,1,80,4|0,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
176,337,89528,2,0,P|213:323|253:324,1,80,8|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
324,360,89944,1,8,0:3:0:0:
372,296,90152,6,0,B|404:271|404:271|441:257|441:257|463:226|467:182,1,160,2|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
432,110,90778,2,0,P|391:104|356:88,1,80,0|2,0:0|0:0,0:0:0:0:
285,52,91194,1,10,0:0:0:0:
213,88,91403,1,2,0:0:0:0:
141,51,91611,1,10,0:0:0:0:
34,105,91819,5,6,0:0:0:0:
256,192,92028,12,0,93694,0:0:0:0:

timemon

Beatmap Nominator

1,305 posts

Joined November 2012

timemon 2017-05-07T03:27:44+00:00

Hello from my queue. I'm new so please bear with me

is this a BGM from Grisaia lmao

I tried

Angelic
00:16:611 (3,4,5) - I hear a little bit of sound on the 5 slider. Maybe change this to a 1/4 repeat slider? It should play the same
00:33:486 (5,6,7,1,2) - I think you should add a 1/2 note between (7) and (1) . Make it a jump maybe I can hear a sound on the red tick.
01:14:736 (4,5,1) - the spacing of this triplet is not consistent. Is this intentional? The spacing stands out more with HR
01:22:860 (6,7) - Maybe change this note to a 1/6 slider? though I can see it can be awkward to play for the player.

I would be grateful if you could comment on my mod as well.

Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-07T08:56:48+00:00

timemon wrote:
Hello from my queue. I'm new so please bear with me

is this a BGM from Grisaia lmao

I tried

Angelic
00:16:611 (3,4,5) - I hear a little bit of sound on the 5 slider. Maybe change this to a 1/4 repeat slider? It should play the same there is indeed sounds there, but i'd prefer to skip them to hold out the piano note. i like that effect better.
00:33:486 (5,6,7,1,2) - I think you should add a 1/2 note between (7) and (1) . Make it a jump maybe I can hear a sound on the red tick. there is a sound but it's in the background and not really worth mapping imo.
01:14:736 (4,5,1) - the spacing of this triplet is not consistent. Is this intentional? The spacing stands out more with HR fixed
01:22:860 (6,7) - Maybe change this note to a 1/6 slider? though I can see it can be awkward to play for the player. boring rhythm simplfication here sry

I would be grateful if you could comment on my mod as well.

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2017-05-10T13:22:43+00:00

[General]
Oh are you sure you are going to enable countdown? Not a good choice for such a soft song.
You have multiple mp3 files, which is ofc unrankable.

Unused files?: soft-hitclap2.wav soft-hitfinish2.wav 707244.png
[Hobbes2's Normal]
00:46:402 (3) - One thing I noticed here is a quite strong beat was placed on the slider-end, which gives less feedback. I may suggest this: https://puu.sh/vLI1e/908330346c.png So that the sound at the whiteline could be clickable.
01:31:923 (1) - How about adding another greenline on the very end to lower the volume? Because the music has faded out greatly.

[Yahuri's Hard]
HP - 1 at least. The HP of highest diff is only set at 5.

[Angelic]
00:08:486 (1) - I actually didnt see the reason of the alternation of sv here.
00:13:902 (1,2) - Well yeah this deserves a larger spacing but this is too large for me. I guess it should be smaller than 00:13:277 (2,3) -
00:36:923 (8) - Remove. Overmapped.
00:37:027 (1) - I am afraid this is unsnapped but we cannot do anything about that yeah
00:38:486 (5) - This should be 3/16
00:40:152 (4,1) - Actually this should be in smaller spacing (weak sound here)
00:43:277 (5) - NC
00:49:736 (1) - No need to NC
01:14:736 (4,5,1) - 1/6？
01:22:965 (7) - Uunsnapped

calmebac

Last edited by Mafumafu 2017-05-11T10:25:52+00:00, edited 1 time in total.

Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-10T15:55:43+00:00

General
Oh are you sure you are going to enable countdown? Not a good choice for such a soft song. removed

Hobbes2's Normal
00:46:402 (3) - One thing I noticed here is a quite strong beat was placed on the slider-end, which gives less feedback. I may suggest this: https://puu.sh/vLI1e/908330346c.png So that the sound at the whiteline could be clickable. forcibly adjusted
01:31:923 (1) - How about adding another greenline on the very end to lower the volume? Because the music has faded out greatly. added

Yahuri's Hard
HP - 1 at least. The HP of highest diff is only set at 5. applied

Angelic
00:08:486 (1) - I actually didnt see the reason of the alternation of sv here. removed
00:13:902 (1,2) - Well yeah this deserves a larger spacing but this is too large for me. I guess it should be smaller than 00:13:277 (2,3) - adjusted to be more similar, it is slightly larger cuz of the piano + drum while the previous one has only a drum
00:36:923 (8) - Remove. Overmapped.
00:37:027 (1) - I am afraid this is unsnapped but we cannot do anything about that yeah technically speaking there's a very faint drum sound there that 00:36:611 (5,6,7) - is also mapped to
00:38:486 (5) - This should be 3/16
00:40:152 (4,1) - Actually this should be in smaller spacing (weak sound here) disagree, this is the start of a new melody. added finish to make the sound stronger.
00:43:277 (5) - NC
00:49:736 (1) - No need to NC prefer it to separate the pattern
01:14:736 (4,5,1) - 1/6？
01:22:965 (7) - Unsnapped same thing here, trying to simplify the rhythm.
[/color]
Continue later sametbh

Last edited by Nao Tomori 2017-05-11T11:05:26+00:00, edited 5 times in total.

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-05-10T16:14:08+00:00

apply tick rate of 1 for my diff as well, i dont think the last update had that fixed xd

Izzywing

osu! Alumni

2,248 posts

Joined March 2016

Izzywing 2017-05-14T05:34:30+00:00

Yuii irc'd me some stuff, fixed a few rhythm stuff and lowered density in like 2 or 3 spots because its the lowest diff (cos i had mapped it without knowing that)

diff

osu file format v14

[General]
AudioFilename: audio.mp3
AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 1
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.3
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LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
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DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 4
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Hobbes2's Normal
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game yahuri hobbes2
BeatmapID:1252031
BeatmapSetID:527942

[Difficulty]
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CircleSize:3.5
OverallDifficulty:3
ApproachRate:4
SliderMultiplier:1.1
SliderTickRate:1

[Events]
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//Break Periods
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Combo2 : 193,0,0
Combo3 : 114,18,114
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Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-14T15:22:46+00:00

'dooted

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2017-05-18T14:16:00+00:00

OwO

Pentori

1,157 posts

Joined November 2015

Pentori 2017-05-23T13:12:46+00:00

uwu
[General]
metadata? just curious as to why the artist is romanised
timing is off, it should somewhat sync with the percussion 00:00:777 - 00:03:277 - 01:09:944 - 01:17:861 - etc. try 373
the last spinner 01:32:028 (1) - could be drawn out longer to end closer to where the music stops. somewhere like 01:35:361 - seems better

[Angelic]
the thing that really stands out to me is the lack of contrast. the beginning 00:00:361 - is a lot less intense than 01:07:027 - yet the designs are quite similar. the base spacing used at the start is quite high, and patterns like 00:04:111 (2,3,4,5,6,7) - heavily increase the density. some things deserve to be reconsidered

00:10:152 (4,5,1) - p sure this is 1/6, the 4 sounds are quite clear here so i dont think u have to simplify
00:15:777 - skipping this feels really empty considering your previous rhythms followed the background sounds
00:15:986 (1,2) - 00:20:361 (2,3) - i dont really agree with the way these r emphasised. using the 1/1 seems to make them easier, and really disconnected with the map

00:16:611 (3,4,5,6,7) - mixing too many tracks here, 00:16:611 (3,4) - begins to map the 1/4s but then is broken by the piano 00:16:819 (5) . 00:17:236 (6) - has the piano on it yet the rhythms switch back to the hihats here 00:17:236 (6,7)
00:21:820 (3) - combo should be placed here, and switched from 00:24:319 (1) - to 00:25:153 (3) - imo. works to keep the accented piano in the same combo
00:29:736 (1,2,3) - u can do better with the aes here. visual spacing
00:36:611 (5,6,7) - im guessing 00:35:986 (2,3,4) - is representing the trills in the music and the next trill begins at 00:36:402 - yet instead you follow the hihats making the rhythm really weird. also 00:36:923 - gets skipped which contains a beat u were following
00:39:527 (1) - might as well skip this, to make the entrance of the piano 00:39:736 (2,3,4) - feel more impactful
00:45:777 (2) - doesn't seem like the best spot to use a 1/1, your other 1/1 sliders had much weaker slider ends
01:19:527 (1,2) - using a slider here, although giving up the piano on 01:19:736 (2) - , makes for a stronger effect as it gets held
01:20:777 (6) - seems better to use 2 circles here for the piano
01:21:611 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - rhythm is really ambiguous as to when you use sliders, beats like 01:23:069 - 01:22:236 - appear on sliderends
01:24:111 (2) - think the slider end should be mapped out here, its clearly different to 01:23:486 (1)

[Yahuri's Hard]
00:13:486 (4,1,2,3,4) - could be grouped better structurally, 00:13:486 (4,1) - are different from 00:13:903 (2,3,4) - so showing that with spacing/comboing would be nice
00:15:777 - why is this skipped? aren't these 00:14:527 (5,1) - following the same sound
00:16:819 (1) - 1/2 + circle would work better to represent 00:17:236 . using the same rhythm for different sounds 00:16:819 (1,2) - doesn't seem like the best idea
00:27:444 (2,3) - seems to ignore the importance of 00:27:444 (2) - since the weaker beat gets clicked directly after. consider using a 1/2 slider instead
00:39:527 (2) - removing this would be better, similar to 00:29:736 (3,4) - having the the objects for the piano only has a stronger effect
01:10:152 (1,2) - swap the ncs here?
wouldve been nice to see some spacing variation in the first half

[Hobbes2's Normal]
00:04:319 (2,3,4,5) - rhythm here gets really dense, as opposed to 00:00:361 (1,2,3,4) . i dont think its nice to introduce density that isn't supported by any change
00:14:527 (2) - dont really see a reason to make this 1/2, the melody exists on the white tick too and is a lot more intuitive
00:16:611 (5) - i dont think this is really necessary? keeping objects exclusively for the piano lets 00:16:819 (1,2) - stand out more
00:28:694 (5) - the longer slider feels a little random, 00:27:652 (3) - has the drawn out piano note to support it while 00:28:694 (5) - only has the background melodies. this also sorts limits what you can do with the piano at 00:29:736 . using a 1/2 reverse like 00:13:902 (1) - would represent it a lot better
00:32:652 (6,1,2) - seems like a mistake, think u should dbl check this
00:58:486 (3,4) - compared to 00:57:861 (2) - these have nothing on their tails, so using 1/1s or something works fine
01:03:694 (1,3) - perhaps u could avoid this overlap

some things need to be addressed first, poke me when you respond

Izzywing

osu! Alumni

2,248 posts

Joined March 2016

Izzywing 2017-05-23T22:29:50+00:00

00:04:319 (2,3,4,5) - rhythm here gets really dense, as opposed to 00:00:361 (1,2,3,4) . i dont think its nice to introduce density that isn't supported by any change fix
00:14:527 (2) - dont really see a reason to make this 1/2, the melody exists on the white tick too and is a lot more intuitive Eh, the melody sound on 00:14:944 - is super faint, and I can barely hear it at 100% speed, would rather map this more noticeable drum hit. Still maintains polarity so gameplaywise it should be fine.
00:16:611 (5) - i dont think this is really necessary? keeping objects exclusively for the piano lets 00:16:819 (1,2) - stand out more ya
00:28:694 (5) - the longer slider feels a little random, 00:27:652 (3) - has the drawn out piano note to support it while 00:28:694 (5) - only has the background melodies. this also sorts limits what you can do with the piano at 00:29:736 . using a 1/2 reverse like 00:13:902 (1) - would represent it a lot better ya
00:32:652 (6,1,2) - seems like a mistake, think u should dbl check this ya
00:58:486 (3,4) - compared to 00:57:861 (2) - these have nothing on their tails, so using 1/1s or something works fine tbh i think that the 1/2 sliders represent the piano well, even if there isn't a specific piano sound on the tails like there is for 2. I can change this if needed but I prefer how it is now
01:03:694 (1,3) - perhaps u could avoid this overlap ya

https://pastebin.com/raw/zFCGZuFB

thanks pentori!

I don't even like this song that much, fuck me for letting nao make me do this

Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-24T05:58:40+00:00

Pentori wrote:
uwu
[General]
metadata? just curious as to why the artist is romanised http://puu.sh/vZKdQ/334f293206.png added jp name
timing is off, it should somewhat sync with the percussion 00:00:777 - 00:03:277 - 01:09:944 - 01:17:861 - etc. try 373 372 :v
the last spinner 01:32:028 (1) - could be drawn out longer to end closer to where the music stops. somewhere like 01:35:361 - seems better i dont really like long spinners and the effect is the same so w/e

[Angelic]
the thing that really stands out to me is the lack of contrast. the beginning 00:00:361 - is a lot less intense than 01:07:027 - yet the designs are quite similar. the base spacing used at the start is quite high, and patterns like 00:04:111 (2,3,4,5,6,7) - heavily increase the density. some things deserve to be reconsidered remapped

00:10:152 (4,5,1) - p sure this is 1/6, the 4 sounds are quite clear here so i dont think u have to simplify
00:15:777 - skipping this feels really empty considering your previous rhythms followed the background sounds
00:15:986 (1,2) - 00:20:361 (2,3) - i dont really agree with the way these r emphasised. using the 1/1 seems to make them easier, and really disconnected with the map made 1/1 breaks more common in the intro. the spacing is kind of high and i dont really want random filler slider ends in this part...
00:16:611 (3,4,5,6,7) - mixing too many tracks here, 00:16:611 (3,4) - begins to map the 1/4s but then is broken by the piano 00:16:819 (5) . 00:17:236 (6) - has the piano on it yet the rhythms switch back to the hihats here 00:17:236 (6,7) i kinda did t his to avoid having a random 9 note stream but still follow parts of the song. yeah it mixes a lot of layers, but i think it's a decent choice here considering the amount of sounds and the density of the section
00:21:820 (3) - combo should be placed here, and switched from 00:24:319 (1) - to 00:25:153 (3) - imo. works to keep the accented piano in the same combo
00:29:736 (1,2,3) - u can do better with the aes here. visual spacing
00:36:611 (5,6,7) - im guessing 00:35:986 (2,3,4) - is representing the trills in the music and the next trill begins at 00:36:402 - yet instead you follow the hihats making the rhythm really weird. also 00:36:923 - gets skipped which contains a beat u were following did some stuff
00:39:527 (1) - might as well skip this, to make the entrance of the piano 00:39:736 (2,3,4) - feel more impactful doesn't having a jump after comfortable spacing make it more impactful o.o that's what i was going for here
00:45:777 (2) - doesn't seem like the best spot to use a 1/1, your other 1/1 sliders had much weaker slider ends
01:19:527 (1,2) - using a slider here, although giving up the piano on 01:19:736 (2) - , makes for a stronger effect as it gets held eh i think having 2 clicks for 2 piano notes is better here cuz of the ascending scale thing that repeats
01:20:777 (6) - seems better to use 2 circles here for the piano 01:20:997 - is not part of the pair of triples in the main piano line, so it isn't clickable here
01:21:611 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - rhythm is really ambiguous as to when you use sliders, beats like 01:23:069 - 01:22:236 - appear on sliderends issue here is that the piano is randomly snapped to 1/6th and i dont want to go off beat by 2/3 once in the map so i just kind of covered it with a repeat slider instead. at 01:22:247 - doesn't sound like a major piano note to me.
01:24:111 (2) - think the slider end should be mapped out here, its clearly different to 01:23:486 (1)

some things need to be addressed first, poke me when you respond

k

Last edited by Nao Tomori 2017-05-24T23:56:47+00:00, edited 1 time in total.

Yahuri

1,400 posts

Joined July 2014

Yahuri 2017-05-24T06:06:22+00:00

Pentori wrote:
[Yahuri's Hard]
00:13:486 (4,1,2,3,4) - could be grouped better structurally, 00:13:486 (4,1) - are different from 00:13:903 (2,3,4) - so showing that with spacing/comboing would be nice changing spacing/combos in this spot would be inconsistent with what ive been doing for the rest of the map
00:15:777 - why is this skipped? aren't these 00:14:527 (5,1) - following the same sound 00:15:777 is pretty soft, i didnt want to put a click there. changed this slider 00:15:152 (1) into 3/2 tho, hopefully it doesnt look too out of place
00:16:819 (1) - 1/2 + circle would work better to represent 00:17:236 . using the same rhythm for different sounds 00:16:819 (1,2) - doesn't seem like the best idea fixed
00:27:444 (2,3) - seems to ignore the importance of 00:27:444 (2) - since the weaker beat gets clicked directly after. consider using a 1/2 slider instead fixed
00:39:527 (2) - removing this would be better, similar to 00:29:736 (3,4) - having the the objects for the piano only has a stronger effect fixed
01:10:152 (1,2) - swap the ncs here? fixed
wouldve been nice to see some spacing variation in the first half fixed to same pattern as kiai

Thanks~

noot

osu file format v14

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AudioLeadIn: 0
PreviewTime: 39945
Countdown: 0
SampleSet: Soft
StackLeniency: 0.7
Mode: 0
LetterboxInBreaks: 0
WidescreenStoryboard: 1

[Editor]
Bookmarks: 13694,27027
DistanceSpacing: 1
BeatDivisor: 4
GridSize: 8
TimelineZoom: 1

[Metadata]
Title:Deadlock
TitleUnicode:Deadlock
Artist:Junpei Fujita
ArtistUnicode:Junpei Fujita
Creator:Naotoshi
Version:Yahuri's Hard
Source:グリザイアの果実 -LE FRUIT DE LA GRISAIA-
Tags:eroge the fruit of the grisaia visual novel game yahuri hobbes2
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464,84,78278,1,2,0:0:0:0:
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252,373,81194,1,8,0:0:0:0:
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490,231,83486,1,2,0:0:0:0:
445,162,83694,6,0,P|411:140|372:134,1,80,8|0,0:3|0:0,0:0:0:0:
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Pentori

1,157 posts

Joined November 2015

Pentori 2017-05-28T06:42:39+00:00

metadata

15:49 Pentori: pretty sure u should just use 藤田淳平
15:50 Naotoshi: i copy pasted elements garden site
15:51 Pentori: link?
15:51 Naotoshi: http://www.ariamusic.co.jp/elements-garden/fujita/
16:10 Pentori: http://media.vgm.io/albums/85/22458/224 ... 703252.jpg
16:10 Pentori: disc 2 no. 19
16:11 Pentori: http://lantis.jp/release-item/LACA-9207.html
16:11 Naotoshi: what am i looing at
16:11 Pentori: song title
16:11 Naotoshi: o
16:11 Pentori: deadlock is "romanised"
16:12 Pentori: and no space in artist
16:12 Pentori: http://puu.sh/w3jLY/677f52c558.jpg
16:14 Naotoshi: alright

[Angelic]
00:15:788 - well i guess mapping this no longer works since you've kept 00:15:997 (1,2) - as circles, it just takes away the importance of 00:15:997 (1) . or perhaps instead you could readjust the spacings
00:16:622 (3,4,5,6,7) - could easily just remove the beat at 00:17:351 (7) - to express 6 better. leaving it as a triple implies its the same set of sounds as 00:16:622 (3,4,5) - yet 3 has no piano
00:21:831 (6) - no reply on this?
00:39:538 (1) - uhh that concept is only valid when you're accenting specific sounds in a passage, here the piano enters at 00:39:747 - and mapping weaker beats with the same rhythm beforehand just takes away the emphasis
01:21:622 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - could very easily just ignore the piano here and map the offbeat snares http://puu.sh/w3kNy/ef91b3c549.jpg

timestamps are referring back to your replies

Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-28T07:23:22+00:00

Pentori wrote:
metadata
15:49 Pentori: pretty sure u should just use 藤田淳平
15:50 Naotoshi: i copy pasted elements garden site
15:51 Pentori: link?
15:51 Naotoshi: http://www.ariamusic.co.jp/elements-garden/fujita/
16:10 Pentori: http://media.vgm.io/albums/85/22458/224 ... 703252.jpg
16:10 Pentori: disc 2 no. 19
16:11 Pentori: http://lantis.jp/release-item/LACA-9207.html
16:11 Naotoshi: what am i looing at
16:11 Pentori: song title
16:11 Naotoshi: o
16:11 Pentori: deadlock is "romanised"
16:12 Pentori: and no space in artist
16:12 Pentori: http://puu.sh/w3jLY/677f52c558.jpg
16:14 Naotoshi: alright
[Angelic]
00:15:788 - well i guess mapping this no longer works since you've kept 00:15:997 (1,2) - as circles, it just takes away the importance of 00:15:997 (1) . or perhaps instead you could readjust the spacings
00:16:622 (3,4,5,6,7) - could easily just remove the beat at 00:17:351 (7) - to express 6 better. leaving it as a triple implies its the same set of sounds as 00:16:622 (3,4,5) - yet 3 has no piano
no, because as i was saying the idea here was to mix the rhythms. the idea is to cover both the piano and the drums here, and with my interpretation 00:17:455 (1) - and 00:16:830 (5) - are matched together, so they both have triples into them.
00:21:831 (6) - no reply on this? uhh changed stuff around
00:39:538 (1) - uhh that concept is only valid when you're accenting specific sounds in a passage, here the piano enters at 00:39:747 - and mapping weaker beats with the same rhythm beforehand just takes away the emphasis
01:21:622 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - could very easily just ignore the piano here and map the offbeat snares http://puu.sh/w3kNy/ef91b3c549.jpg i dont really wanna ignore the piano here tho o.o i think what i have here works okay as a sort of rhythm simplification

timestamps are referring back to your replies

Pentori

1,157 posts

Joined November 2015

Pentori 2017-05-29T02:35:27+00:00

alright

Mafumafu

Beatmap Nominator

3,361 posts

Joined August 2013

Mafumafu 2017-05-30T12:25:07+00:00

[Hobbes' Normal]
00:46:413 (7) - I think it should end 1/2 earlier since it is not very appropriate to place a super strong beat on slider-end. 00:46:830 Also here's a sound that should be mapped out.
00:38:288 Add a note?

call me bak

Nao Tomori

Nomination Assessment Team

3,089 posts

Joined December 2014

Topic Starter

Nao Tomori 2017-05-30T15:05:51+00:00

Regraz wrote:
[Hobbes' Normal]
00:46:413 (7) - I think it should end 1/2 earlier since it is not very appropriate to place a super strong beat on slider-end. 00:46:830 Also here's a sound that should be mapped out. done
00:38:288 Add a note? no, that note isnt too noticable to me and trying to keep the note density low here in order to differentiate the kiai from the intro part

call me bak

will updoot when quali