I beg you to not push yourself too much. I pushed myself a little over my limits of playing standard! and taiko! maps. I can see why getting +97% acc on easy maps will help improve. Playing hard maps are always fun but I had learnt that if we push too much RSI will come. I had learnt a valuable lesson.
I think you are opening up a bit more then before and that's maybe an improvement but if you decide to talk with some people you like/trust about your problems I think you could bring the best out of yourself and not be gloomy everytime u come across something bad ;p