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Ceui - Hana ni Natta Shounen no Shinwa

posted
Total Posts
120
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu
This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on 2015年6月25日 at 22:13:11

Artist: Ceui
Title: Hana ni Natta Shounen no Shinwa
Tags: Mythology of a boy who became a calendula 奏愛カレンデュラ
BPM: 183
Filesize: 24192kb
Play Time: 13:49
Difficulties Available:
  1. Calendula (5.13 stars, 2174 notes)
Download: Ceui - Hana ni Natta Shounen no Shinwa
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
仆は君のカレンデュラ　太阳になる

bubble by Kibbleru , CelsiusLK , CloudSplash16

thx mod ~
liangv587
z1085684963
CloudSplash16  ☆
[Teichan]
tm1209
Kagamine Ren  ☆
ErunamoJAZZ
ZZHBOY
Regraz
Kibbleru
Shad0w1and
Gentle Heart  ☆
monstrata
sodarose
CelsiusLK  ☆
jonathanlfj  ☆☆
MoleAkarin
ken2010123
Adol Christin
Crystal
09kami

SPOILER
关于金盏花有一个著名的神话，传说西西里岛上住着一个崇拜太阳神阿波罗的少年クリムノン，每一天能够与驾着日轮马车的阿波罗相会让这位少年感到非常幸福。但是两人的亲密关系遭到了云神的妒忌，他用云遮挡阿波罗整整八天。第九天，阿波罗发现少年因为不能忍受无法与阿波罗见面的悲伤而离世。为了悼念这位小爱人，阿波罗把少年变成了金盏花。不管这个神话是真是假，但是金盏花已经被赋予了悲伤的形象，由此引申的花语有“悲叹”、“离别之痛”
Last edited by Narcissu , edited 103 times in total.
liangv587
472 posts
Joined April 2013
liangv587
我已经报警了
135028,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
190109,327.868852459016,5,1,0,100,1,0
199945,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
205846,327.868852459016,4,1,0,100,1,0
207157,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
255667,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
257000,344.827586206897,6,1,0,100,1,0
257344,319.148936170213,6,1,0,100,1,0
257663,329.67032967033,6,1,0,100,1,0
259641,340.909090909091,6,1,0,100,1,0
261686,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
263352,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
329351,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
385350,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
405775,459.418070444104,4,1,0,100,1,0
413125,333.333333333333,3,1,0,100,1,0
434125,333.333333333333,3,1,0,100,1,0
523124,333.333333333333,5,1,0,100,1,0
539124,326.975476839237,5,1,0,100,1,0
548769,352.941176470588,5,1,0,100,1,0
548945,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
554846,329.67032967033,4,1,0,100,1,0
556164,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
599568,319.148936170213,7,1,0,100,1,0
612972,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
618083,638.297872340426,4,1,0,100,1,0
627338,638.297872340426,3,1,0,100,1,0
629252,666.666666666667,3,1,0,100,1,0
667252,333.277787035494,6,1,0,100,1,0
723242,331.491712707182,4,1,0,100,1,0
727219,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
735219,331.12582781457,4,1,0,100,1,0
738530,336.134453781513,4,1,0,100,1,0
739202,332.042058660764,4,1,0,100,1,0
743186,332.963374028857,4,1,0,100,1,0
753840,331.491712707182,4,1,0,100,1,0
756491,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
759157,331.766657450926,4,1,0,100,1,0
810911,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
F6，把红线全删了，那这串数字粘贴进去，为了以防万一，可以先将原来的备份
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

liangv587 wrote:

我已经报警了
SPOILER
135028,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
190109,327.868852459016,5,1,0,100,1,0
199945,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
205846,327.868852459016,4,1,0,100,1,0
207157,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
255667,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
257000,344.827586206897,6,1,0,100,1,0
257344,319.148936170213,6,1,0,100,1,0
257663,329.67032967033,6,1,0,100,1,0
259641,340.909090909091,6,1,0,100,1,0
261686,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
263352,333.333333333333,6,1,0,100,1,0
329351,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
385350,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
405775,459.418070444104,4,1,0,100,1,0
413125,333.333333333333,3,1,0,100,1,0
434125,333.333333333333,3,1,0,100,1,0
523124,333.333333333333,5,1,0,100,1,0
539124,326.975476839237,5,1,0,100,1,0
548769,352.941176470588,5,1,0,100,1,0
548945,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
554846,329.67032967033,4,1,0,100,1,0
556164,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
599568,319.148936170213,7,1,0,100,1,0
612972,319.148936170213,4,1,0,100,1,0
618083,638.297872340426,4,1,0,100,1,0
627338,638.297872340426,3,1,0,100,1,0
629252,666.666666666667,3,1,0,100,1,0
667252,333.277787035494,6,1,0,100,1,0
723242,331.491712707182,4,1,0,100,1,0
727219,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
735219,331.12582781457,4,1,0,100,1,0
738530,336.134453781513,4,1,0,100,1,0
739202,332.042058660764,4,1,0,100,1,0
743186,332.963374028857,4,1,0,100,1,0
753840,331.491712707182,4,1,0,100,1,0
756491,333.333333333333,4,1,0,100,1,0
759157,331.766657450926,4,1,0,100,1,0
810911,327.868852459016,6,1,0,100,1,0
F6，把红线全删了，那这串数字粘贴进去，为了以防万一，可以先将原来的备份
少女你確定這麼多線麼……連段落都看不清了…… :?
Streliteela
612 posts
Joined January 2012
Streliteela
maya我报警了
Lavender
886 posts
Joined January 2014
Lavender
maya我报警了
忽然有了把Alice in Musicland填了的冲动 然而timing爆炸
Pururut
488 posts
Joined March 2012
Pururut
14分钟虾仁
-Nanaka-
815 posts
Joined July 2013
-Nanaka-
太好了... :oops:
我好期待！
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

-Nanaka- wrote:

太好了... :oops:
我好期待！

感谢支持 ::>_<::
z1085684963
327 posts
Joined August 2012
z1085684963
m4m
[Calendula]
02:19:700漏
02:27:814 (1) - blanket
02:30:109 (2) - wistle
02:37:650 (2) - 来点向下的弧度
02:39:618 (1) - blanket
03:06:175 (1) - 03:06:339重音在这里
03:19:945 (1) - 可以和5错开，好看
04:05:933 (2) - 这个间距有点不好看
04:30:686 (5) - blanket
05:19:185 (7) - 往上移一点
05:48:351 (2) - ctrl+g
06:00:017 (1,2,3) - blanket
06:01:850 (2) - 向左的弧度
07:29:125 (3) - 不是吧
07:55:625 (5,6) - blanket
08:22:125 (1,2) - 换成两个note比较好
10:16:801 (1,1,1) - 这里就和上面相反，滑条更合适
10:31:168漏
10:34:252 (2) - 折返
10:49:252 (1,2) - 两个滑条的节奏换一下
10:56:252 (2) - 向左的弧度
10:59:252 (1) - 3/4滑条加note
11:01:252 (1) - ^
11:03:252 (1) - ^
11:12:251 (4) - 滑条尾向外的弧度
11:14:584 (5,6,7,8,9,10,1) - 1/4塞满
11:22:582 (5,6,7,8,9,10,1) - ^ 听着像1/3
11:51:161 (10) - 删了
13:08:352 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,1) - 没有打击感？
13:29:585 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,1) - ^

并没有kiai
Little
2,509 posts
Joined November 2012
Little
M4M
Mythology of a boy who became a narcissus

[General]
  1. Maybe add some kiai time? There are many parts where it would fit well.
  2. Your silenced sliderslide samples are not the proper 0-byte *.wav files. You must use this: up.ppy.sh/files/blank.wav
  3. soft-hitfinish.wav has a significant amount of delay.
  4. 07:22:125 - Should clearly be 180BPM. You can tell because the feel in the music is s-w-w, as opposed to the s-w-s-w in your current timing.
  5. 08:56:457 - 4|4 time signature.
  6. 09:08:960 - 6|4 time signature.
  7. 10:10:738 - Time signature here should still be 7|4. It doesn't change to 4|4 until 10:12:972 You might need to rework your rhythms in this part, since they don't match downbeats with the correct timing.
[Calendula]
  1. 02:23:224 (2,3) - Right now, movement from (1) to (2) is awkward. It think you can make it more flowy by doing this: http://puu.sh/hojc4/efe230e31d.jpg
  2. 03:51:093 (5,6) - I feel like this pattern doesn't really fit well because of the sharp angle when moving to (6). http://puu.sh/hojHb/be179c5c03.jpg I think it will be better if you make the movement more direct like you did with the previous ones.
  3. 04:45:907 (2,3) - Better to overlap these to match the previous parts, avoid confusion regarding the rhythm.
  4. 06:46:413 - Don't really see any reason to pull the break here. I think it's better to just leave it to start in its natural time.
  5. 10:16:801 (1) - I think a long slider will fit better here, showing the sustained electric guitar note.
  6. 10:18:397 - Don't need to pull the break here. You'll see after you fix the timing, that your last note before this is on a downbeat, fits start of the break better.
  7. 11:27:248 (1,2) - It'd be nice if you could avoid this kind of edge overlap, as it doesn't look very good.
  8. 11:29:248 (1) - Slider shape looks kind of awkward. It would look better if you curved the first half a bit: http://puu.sh/hol5t/23f0b2563a.jpg
Good luck.
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu
@ z1085684963

fix some and add kiai

CloudSplash16 wrote:

M4M
Mythology of a boy who became a narcissus ...

[General]
  1. Maybe add some kiai time? There are many parts where it would fit well. …… ok √
  2. Your silenced sliderslide samples are not the proper 0-byte *.wav files. You must use this: up.ppy.sh/files/blank.wav …… fix orz
  3. soft-hitfinish.wav has a significant amount of delay. …… but i don't know how to fix it …… wait me ask for
  4. 07:22:125 - Should clearly be 180BPM. You can tell because the feel in the music is s-w-w, as opposed to the s-w-s-w in your current timing. …… i don't know what is s-w-w orz …… i use 90 because i dislike the slidertick …… could i keep 90 ?
  5. 08:56:457 - 4|4 time signature.……fix
  6. 09:08:960 - 6|4 time signature. …… a …… i forget it ……
  7. 10:10:738 - Time signature here should still be 7|4. It doesn't change to 4|4 until 10:12:972 You might need to rework your rhythms in this part, since they don't match downbeats with the correct timing.…… although i think is 4/4 LOL …… fix
[Calendula]
  1. 02:23:224 (2,3) - Right now, movement from (1) to (2) is awkward. It think you can make it more flowy by doing this: http://puu.sh/hojc4/efe230e31d.jpg …… yes your flow better …… but i have to add jump in next slider …… i'm ds style ……
  2. 03:51:093 (5,6) - I feel like this pattern doesn't really fit well because of the sharp angle when moving to (6). http://puu.sh/hojHb/be179c5c03.jpg I think it will be better if you make the movement more direct like you did with the previous ones. …… ahh …… lovely picture …… ok √
  3. 04:45:907 (2,3) - Better to overlap these to match the previous parts, avoid confusion regarding the rhythm.……ok
  4. 06:46:413 - Don't really see any reason to pull the break here. I think it's better to just leave it to start in its natural time. …… ok , other part fix too
  5. 10:16:801 (1) - I think a long slider will fit better here, showing the sustained electric guitar note.…… ok
  6. 10:18:397 - Don't need to pull the break here. You'll see after you fix the timing, that your last note before this is on a downbeat, fits start of the break better.
  7. 11:27:248 (1,2) - It'd be nice if you could avoid this kind of edge overlap, as it doesn't look very good. …… ok , overlap max [ nani ?
  8. 11:29:248 (1) - Slider shape looks kind of awkward. It would look better if you curved the first half a bit: http://puu.sh/hol5t/23f0b2563a.jpg …… ok


Good luck.
Little
2,509 posts
Joined November 2012
Little

Narcissu wrote:

CloudSplash16 wrote:

07:22:125 - Should clearly be 180BPM. You can tell because the feel in the music is s-w-w, as opposed to the s-w-s-w in your current timing. …… i don't know what is s-w-w orz …… i use 90 because i dislike the slidertick …… could i keep 90 ?
I mean the beat pattern is Strong-Weak-Weak (triple), rather than Strong-Weak-Strong-Weak (duple). In your current timing, the ticks don't line up correctly with white ticks on strong beats.
It is the most correct to use 180BPM and 3|4 time.
The closest thing that could be appropriate to use for avoiding slider ticks is this: http://puu.sh/hoJAf/9b808e67f0.png with 1/6 beat snap divisor. (Note, if you use 3.00x SV, it must be announced in the beatmap description, according to RC)
Here's a fixed soft-hitfinish.wav
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

CloudSplash16 wrote:

07:22:125 - Should clearly be 180BPM. You can tell because the feel in the music is s-w-w, as opposed to the s-w-s-w in your current timing. …… i don't know what is s-w-w orz …… i use 90 because i dislike the slidertick …… could i keep 90 ?
I mean the beat pattern is Strong-Weak-Weak (triple), rather than Strong-Weak-Strong-Weak (duple). In your current timing, the ticks don't line up correctly with white ticks on strong beats.
It is the most correct to use 180BPM and 3|4 time.
The closest thing that could be appropriate to use for avoiding slider ticks is this: http://puu.sh/hoJAf/9b808e67f0.png with 1/6 beat snap divisor. (Note, if you use 3.00x SV, it must be announced in the beatmap description, according to RC)
Here's a fixed soft-hitfinish.wav
nani …… i use 90 - 3/4 instead of 180 - 3/4 in order to wipe out slidertick …… without 4/4 and …… what is 60 - 1/6 orz …… maybe i need use tickrate 1 → 0.5 ? my english bad …… i use Google translation XD

and i can't update now …… http://puu.sh/hoKOU/d068637d7b.jpg

thx you for your wav ><
Karen
2,860 posts
Joined August 2013
Karen
10分钟啊，先占位防忘
Lavender
886 posts
Joined January 2014
Lavender
Apollo is truly a girl o('_'O)

[General]
  1. 加上专辑名 奏愛カレンデュラ，不知道放Source还是tags里，建议咨询一下qat
  2. drum-sliderslide.wav 是62字节的 用这个 http://up.ppy.sh/files/blank.wav
  3. soft-hitfinish.wav 有12ms的delay 帮你修好啦 点我！
  4. Found unused .wav files:
    - soft-sliderslide2.wav
    - drum-sliderslide.wav
    - soft-hitwhistle2.wav
[Calendula]
  1. 前奏这么长真的没事吗，听了下觉得是可以map的
  2. 02:21:421 (4) - 虽然最终节奏上并没有错但是这个折返还是感觉有点违和 (而且这个blanket也没拉好
  3. 02:32:241 (4,5) - 一条直线上
  4. 03:23:059 (4) - 这里跟的并不是鼓点而是bass，我觉得在这里跟vocal比较好
  5. 05:33:851 (4,5,6,1,2) - 这里的鼓点是有1/3的，从05:33:795开始，是连续9个1/3音，后面接的是1/2没错
    还是上图吧(也是我的建议下法)
  6. 05:39:184 - 05:39:267 - 这两个地方漏了鼓，也就是说原本应该是一个三连，stack上去即可
  7. 05:40:017 (1) - 个人感觉，这里不是4/4拍，(然而我也不知道是什么拍
  8. 06:41:626 (3,1) - flow不太舒服，我觉得1和2换个位置比较好
  9. 06:53:125 (1) - 是不是调过nc了，这一段和sb的颜色不一样
  10. 08:28:958 (1) - sb灰白化感觉晚了些，需要提前一点 08:37:124 (1) - 这里也是
  11. 09:05:025 (4,5,6,7) - 鼓是1/3，虽然不改好像也没事
  12. 09:12:074 (4) - 同上，我觉得这里跟vocal比较好
  13. 09:42:653 (3,4,5,6) - 吐槽一下，感觉像是星爷或者反震图的梗，不太善良

    Zero__Wind wrote:

    要善良
  14. 09:46:802 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - 这里的1/3短滑条并不好读，因为前面你刚放了1/4短滑条，所以我还是建议这里用1/3折返
  15. 09:51:270 (1,2,3,4) - 这里用1->4->2->3的顺序好一些吧
  16. 09:55:738 (1) - 3/4拉成这种形状是很容易拉断的
  17. 14:06:648 - 经检测，实际上是在差不多这里的地方退出然后进入成绩结算界面，不太合适，我建议提前到14:05:665 - 方法是改一下最后一个图片fade完的时间
一边吃冰激凌一边mod，少女也试试吧 然后mod完发现冰激凌化了 √

懒mod->没星可射，有点悲伤 少女加油啊！
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

[Teichan] wrote:

Apollo is truly a girl o('_'O)

[General]
  1. 加上专辑名 奏愛カレンデュラ，不知道放Source还是tags里，建议咨询一下qat
  2. drum-sliderslide.wav 是62字节的 用这个 http://up.ppy.sh/files/blank.wav
  3. soft-hitfinish.wav 有12ms的delay 帮你修好啦 点我！
  4. Found unused .wav files:
    - soft-sliderslide2.wav
    - drum-sliderslide.wav
    - soft-hitwhistle2.wav
all fix ><

然而tag裏面仍然沒多少東西……

[Calendula]
  1. 前奏这么长真的没事吗，听了下觉得是可以map的 …… 有變速哦，而且對於多次retry的人來說，開頭無聊的段落會感覺煩躁吧
  2. 02:21:421 (4) - 虽然最终节奏上并没有错但是这个折返还是感觉有点违和 (而且这个blanket也没拉好 …… fix ……
  3. 02:32:241 (4,5) - 一条直线上……fix ……
  4. 03:23:059 (4) - 这里跟的并不是鼓点而是bass，我觉得在这里跟vocal比较好……我覺得紅線1/1折返比較帥……也為連單點提供休息
  5. 05:33:851 (4,5,6,1,2) - 这里的鼓点是有1/3的，从05:33:795开始，是连续9个1/3音，后面接的是1/2没错……不跟奇怪的東西……除了變奏結尾和紅色BG的段落以外我都是1/2
    还是上图吧(也是我的建议下法)
  6. 05:39:184 - 05:39:267 - 这两个地方漏了鼓，也就是说原本应该是一个三连，stack上去即可……額，它和旋律軌的重音比起來完全無關緊要，加上去反而令人疑惑
  7. 05:40:017 (1) - 个人感觉，这里不是4/4拍，(然而我也不知道是什么拍……雖然我也不知道……
  8. 06:41:626 (3,1) - flow不太舒服，我觉得1和2换个位置比较好……好
  9. 06:53:125 (1) - 是不是调过nc了，这一段和sb的颜色不一样……少女開無視所有譜面自帶skin了？？我這裡是藍色開頭……
  10. 08:28:958 (1) - sb灰白化感觉晚了些，需要提前一点 08:37:124 (1) - 这里也是……fix
  11. 09:05:025 (4,5,6,7) - 鼓是1/3，虽然不改好像也没事
  12. 09:12:074 (4) - 同上，我觉得这里跟vocal比较好
  13. 09:42:653 (3,4,5,6) - 吐槽一下，感觉像是星爷或者反震图的梗，不太善良……但是能讀就沒有難度……太陽神的憤怒

    Zero__Wind wrote:

    要善良
  14. 09:46:802 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - 这里的1/3短滑条并不好读，因为前面你刚放了1/4短滑条，所以我还是建议这里用1/3折返……^
  15. 09:51:270 (1,2,3,4) - 这里用1->4->2->3的顺序好一些吧……越難越好√
  16. 09:55:738 (1) - 3/4拉成这种形状是很容易拉断的
  17. 14:06:648 - 经检测，实际上是在差不多这里的地方退出然后进入成绩结算界面，不太合适，我建议提前到14:05:665 - 方法是改一下最后一个图片fade完的时间……fix ……
一边吃冰激凌一边mod，少女也试试吧 然后mod完发现冰激凌化了 √

懒mod->没星可射，有点悲伤 少女加油啊！……不清楚會是什麼結果ahh
感謝摸圖><
EncoreW
833 posts
Joined June 2013
EncoreW
[General]


AR=8，HP=5？马拉松的HP似乎都不用太高


[Calendula]


第一个note之前可以加个转盘因为有风声

02:30:765 (1) - 这里的节奏这样下？

02:46:503 (1,2) - 听上去第一个音量要明显比第二个大一点，可以调整一下，后面几个也差不多

04:05:135 (3,4) - 这两个我觉得没必要放在一起，还是分开好点，个人倾向这样放，3和4顺序换一下感觉也不错

04:30:240 (3,4,5) - 这地方的blanket看上去反而有点难看因为差的太近，我觉得不如不用

04:42:352 (5) - 红点没有严格的和04:42:018 (4) - 的末尾一起

05:34:017 (5,6) - 这地方我听出了1/6

05:40:017 (1) - 这个NC感觉也没必要啊

09:40:419 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - 我反正是不喜欢这么放的，而且是在这种地方，这么容易读错的梗放在2000c左右的地方，掉了就要重新开始，换了心态不好的大概要骂人的，这种梗我觉得要放也最好放在头尾

09:51:589 (3,4) - 换下位置

12:45:792 (1,2,3,4) - 听背景音乐也没觉得这里有啥必要放个重叠的，感觉间距似乎也没必要放的太大

13:08:352 (1) - 这个串的音量可以逐渐变大，后面那个滑条的finish我觉得可以更明显一点

13:29:585 (1) - 同上



顶着20FPS摸图真是受不了
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

tm1209 wrote:

[General]


AR=8，HP=5？马拉松的HP似乎都不用太高 …… 我知道你說的是OD，都改了√


[Calendula]

第一个note之前可以加个转盘因为有风声……每次retry都要轉幾秒有點土……

02:30:765 (1) - 这里的节奏这样下？……等我會學校能看見Puu的時候看看……

02:46:503 (1,2) - 听上去第一个音量要明显比第二个大一点，可以调整一下，后面几个也差不多……好

04:05:135 (3,4) - 这两个我觉得没必要放在一起，还是分开好点，个人倾向这样放，3和4顺序换一下感觉也不错……好，等我會學校能看見Puu的時候改

04:30:240 (3,4,5) - 这地方的blanket看上去反而有点难看因为差的太近，我觉得不如不用……改掉了

04:42:352 (5) - 红点没有严格的和04:42:018 (4) - 的末尾一起……強迫症MAX LOL

05:34:017 (5,6) - 这地方我听出了1/6……只能下折返的話反而很討厭……

05:40:017 (1) - 这个NC感觉也没必要啊……這是被故事版逼出來的orz …… 養成藍色開頭的好習慣……雖然那個地方是可以手動選藍色……

09:40:419 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - 我反正是不喜欢这么放的，而且是在这种地方，这么容易读错的梗放在2000c左右的地方，掉了就要重新开始，换了心态不好的大概要骂人的，这种梗我觉得要放也最好放在头尾……額，雖然我的本意就是弄難讀一點……改了

09:51:589 (3,4) - 换下位置……好

12:45:792 (1,2,3,4) - 听背景音乐也没觉得这里有啥必要放个重叠的，感觉间距似乎也没必要放的太大……拉近了√

13:08:352 (1) - 这个串的音量可以逐渐变大，后面那个滑条的finish我觉得可以更明显一点……額，外加音量線然後切回去？感覺有點土……

13:29:585 (1) - 同上



顶着20FPS摸图真是受不了……在view裏面把故事版和漸入滑條關了大概能上到25 (＞﹏＜)
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

Kagamine Ren wrote:

10分钟啊，先占位防忘
佔位防跳票 ~
Karen
2,860 posts
Joined August 2013
Karen

General

  1. fine

Calendula

  1. 02:21:421 (4) - this rhythm here seems bad to me because you ignored 02:21:585 - this beat but this is supposed to be mapped. I suggest this rhythm:
    SPOILER
  2. 02:16:339 (2,3) - NC for the anti-jump then they can be easier to read.
  3. 02:33:880 (2,3) - this jump seems a bit unnecessary because there is not any strong beat here. So it's better to move 02:34:044 (3) - closer, like this:
    SPOILER
  4. 02:39:618 (1) - this slider seems a bit weird, pls curve it more and make a better blanket with 02:40:437 (2) - . Here is the example:
    SPOILER
  5. 02:45:519 (1,2,3) - why use sliders here. Obviously here are many strong beats and jumps fit them very well. Here is my suggestion about the rhythm and placement:
    SPOILER
  6. 02:49:126 - i can't understand why you ignore this. it's quite important imo.
  7. 02:51:093 - ^ same with above
  8. 02:52:077 - ^ same with above
  9. 03:01:421 - i think you are not supposed to let a slider's tail on this beat. I'd say it's better to change this rhythm here, a note or a slider's head are both ok. Here is my personal advice:
    SPOILER
  10. 03:02:077 - add two notes here as you can see on the picture above. I think they perfectly fit here
  11. 03:09:126 (1,2,3) - same with above. Jumps fit here more imo
  12. 03:25:683 (4,1) - why this spacing is even smaller than 03:25:191 (1,2,3,4) - this. This is the last note of a part so it should be a big jump imo.
  13. 03:47:582 (1) - After a long stream you should use a slider instead of a note to decrease players' pressure after a stream. And 03:47:582 (1,2) - the spacing is just too smap
  14. 04:14:710 (1,2) - the rhythm sounds a bit weird to me. I suggest this :
    SPOILER
  15. 05:19:185 (7,1) - the spacing is too small imo cuz 05:19:352 (1) - this vocal is a bit strong. I would like to move 05:19:185 (7) - more far, like (358,125)
    SPOILER
  16. 05:27:685 (3,1,2) - this rhythm really doesn't fit here. I highly suggest to make jumps instead of this. maybe this is better:
    SPOILER
  17. 05:47:351 (4,5,6) - the flow here looks a bit bad, i's say move 05:47:351 (4,5,6) - up to around (167,17) then it should be better, like this:
    SPOILER
  18. 06:30:456 (1) - The slider doesn't fit here imo because you ignored 06:30:615 - this. So i think you should use a reserve slider or 3 notes instead of the 1/1 slider like you did at06:27:903 (1,2,3) -
  19. 06:40:669 (1) - ^ same with above.
  20. 07:29:125 (3) - overmap slider? it's totally no need here imo. just use onw circle 07:29:125 - here is enough
  21. 07:51:625 (4,1) - nazi: it's better to make them parallel.
  22. 09:51:270 (1,2,3,4) - this pattern looks bad and a bit hard for play. I suggest this placement:
    SPOILER
  23. 10:39:252 (1) - the reserve slider doesn't fit here imo because i think 10:40:252 - this shouldn't be ignored. Here is my suggestion:
    SPOILER
  24. 10:59:752 - it seems strange if you ignore this. Consider to use this rhythm instead:
    SPOILER
  25. 11:38:496 - start the stream here?
  26. 11:46:078 (4) - consider to change this slider into 2 notes because jumps fit here more imo, like this:
    SPOILER
  27. 11:59:243 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - you repeated the same parttern too many times which may make players fell very bored. I suggest you to change one style at 12:00:743 - ,maybe 12:00:743 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - all Ctrl+H can make them better.
  28. 12:07:885 (5,6) - this jump can be more fun. just my personal advice. like this:
    SPOILER
    circle 6 stacks on 3
  29. 12:37:657 - i feel really bad when i test this , pls add a note here

Hitsound

  1. 02:45:519 (1,2,3) - I suggest to add claps on these sliders' head since you add finishs on02:46:503 (1,2) - these notes then need a transition.
  2. 03:09:126 (1,2,3) - ^ add claps too because they are emphasis
  3. 03:12:240 (2) - why did you add finish on this not 03:11:748 (1) - ? I suggest to add finish on the first slider's head. Like you did at03:10:109 (1,2) -
  4. 03:13:387 (1,2) - ^
  5. 03:16:666 (1,2) - ^
  6. 03:33:061 (3) - missing clap on the slider's tail.
  7. 04:11:837 (3) - remove this finish? i can't see any emphasis here.
  8. 05:37:351 (1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2) - no hitsounds here? it's better to add finishs or claps on these note. In my opinion, I would like to add claps on 05:37:351 (1,1,1,1,1) - these circles.
  9. 05:45:851 (2,3) - no sliderslide on this?
  10. 06:07:017 (2) - missing clap on this slider's head.
  11. 06:09:684 (3) - ^
  12. 06:31:254 (3) - miss clap on the slider's tail.
  13. 06:40:190 (4) - ^
  14. 06:41:626 (3) - missing clap. Did you miss them on purpose? but it sounds a bit weird.
  15. 06:59:291 (2) - add whistle?
  16. 08:07:458 (6) - add clap on the slider's head like you did on 08:05:458 (4) - this?
  17. 08:08:791 (3) - ^ on the tail
  18. 08:24:124 (1,2) - add finish on both slider's head to emphasise the sound(i don't know what's this..
  19. 09:00:763 (1) - why you added finish instead of whistle? pls change to whistle sinceyou did at 08:59:124 (1,1) -
  20. 11:19:583 - add clap for consistency.
  21. 13:44:681 (1) - Though you add whistle, i still suggest you to add clap for consistency.
:) star.
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

Kagamine Ren wrote:

General

  1. fine

Calendula

  1. 02:21:421 (4) - this rhythm here seems bad to me because you ignored 02:21:585 - this beat but this is supposed to be mapped. I suggest this rhythm:
    SPOILER


    ……額，開頭我是完全跟鼓附帶填空……因為旋律軌有多次重複，我沒辦法用一樣的節奏擺太多次所以各個段落都是看心情 .-.

  2. 02:16:339 (2,3) - NC for the anti-jump then they can be easier to read.……我覺得不用……
  3. 02:33:880 (2,3) - this jump seems a bit unnecessary because there is not any strong beat here. So it's better to move 02:34:044 (3) - closer, like this:
    SPOILER

    ……好
  4. 02:39:618 (1) - this slider seems a bit weird, pls curve it more and make a better blanket with 02:40:437 (2) - . Here is the example:
    SPOILER

    ……ok
  5. 02:45:519 (1,2,3) - why use sliders here. Obviously here are many strong beats and jumps fit them very well. Here is my suggestion about the rhythm and placement:
    SPOILER

    我並不覺得這需要如此誇張的表現（比後面的雙note finish還要遠並且是連續八單點）……而且少年你強制無視歌曲自帶皮膚了，我的故事版美麗
  6. 02:49:126 - i can't understand why you ignore this. it's quite important imo.
  7. 02:51:093 - ^ same with above
  8. 02:52:077 - ^ same with above
  9. 03:01:421 - i think you are not supposed to let a slider's tail on this beat. I'd say it's better to change this rhythm here, a note or a slider's head are both ok. Here is my personal advice:
    SPOILER

    ……ok
  10. 03:02:077 - add two notes here as you can see on the picture above. I think they perfectly fit here……好
  11. 03:09:126 (1,2,3) - same with above. Jumps fit here more imo
  12. 03:25:683 (4,1) - why this spacing is even smaller than 03:25:191 (1,2,3,4) - this. This is the last note of a part so it should be a big jump imo.……額，我覺得放中間也挺有感覺……其實是發現改不掉，後面是疊起來的
  13. 03:47:582 (1) - After a long stream you should use a slider instead of a note to decrease players' pressure after a stream. And 03:47:582 (1,2) - the spacing is just too smap……反正並不難……
  14. 04:14:710 (1,2) - the rhythm sounds a bit weird to me. I suggest this : ……
    SPOILER
  15. 05:19:185 (7,1) - the spacing is too small imo cuz 05:19:352 (1) - this vocal is a bit strong. I would like to move 05:19:185 (7) - more far, like (358,125)……
    SPOILER


    ……這一片大改了一通，之前之所以DS這麼低是被SV騙了orz

  16. 05:27:685 (3,1,2) - this rhythm really doesn't fit here. I highly suggest to make jumps instead of this. maybe this is better:
    SPOILER


    好，不過這要動一大堆排版，要斷網了我先放著先……
  17. 05:47:351 (4,5,6) - the flow here looks a bit bad, i's say move 05:47:351 (4,5,6) - up to around (167,17) then it should be better, like this:
    SPOILER

    blanket 美麗又要改一片排版……先放放……
  18. 06:30:456 (1) - The slider doesn't fit here imo because you ignored 06:30:615 - this. So i think you should use a reserve slider or 3 notes instead of the 1/1 slider like you did at06:27:903 (1,2,3) -

    ……這個不是“少年”兩個音嗎……

  19. 06:40:669 (1) - ^ same with above. …… 這不是“太陽”兩個音嗎 Orz
  20. 07:29:125 (3) - overmap slider? it's totally no need here imo. just use onw circle 07:29:125 - here is enough

    ……好，去掉了√

  21. 07:51:625 (4,1) - nazi: it's better to make them parallel.……fix
  22. 09:51:270 (1,2,3,4) - this pattern looks bad and a bit hard for play. I suggest this placement:
    SPOILER

    ……彆扭和難打正是我想要的效果……
  23. 10:39:252 (1) - the reserve slider doesn't fit here imo because i think 10:40:252 - this shouldn't be ignored. Here is my suggestion:
    SPOILER

    ……無視鋼琴是為了10:40:918 (2) - 這個“啦”……這段的人聲比鋼琴存在感要多得多%……
  24. 10:59:752 - it seems strange if you ignore this. Consider to use this rhythm instead:
    SPOILER

    ……ok，後面一樣的地方也改了
  25. 11:38:496 - start the stream here?

    ……納尼居然是藍線起……容我思考一下……作者簡直毫無人性
  26. 11:46:078 (4) - consider to change this slider into 2 notes because jumps fit here more imo, like this:
    SPOILER

    ……斷出梗斷出梗
  27. 11:59:243 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - you repeated the same parttern too many times which may make players fell very bored. I suggest you to change one style at 12:00:743 - ,maybe 12:00:743 (1,2,3,1,2,3,1,2,3) - all Ctrl+H can make them better.

  28. 12:07:885 (5,6) - this jump can be more fun. just my personal advice. like this:
    SPOILER
    circle 6 stacks on 3

    太喪心病狂了……這個能直接影響星級……
  29. 12:37:657 - i feel really bad when i test this , pls add a note here

    ……ok

Hitsound

  1. 02:45:519 (1,2,3) - I suggest to add claps on these sliders' head since you add finishs on02:46:503 (1,2) - these notes then need a transition.……我覺得這裡更適合突兀而不是過渡……
  2. 03:09:126 (1,2,3) - ^ add claps too because they are emphasis ……^
  3. 03:12:240 (2) - why did you add finish on this not 03:11:748 (1) - ? I suggest to add finish on the first slider's head. Like you did at03:10:109 (1,2) - ……因為原曲就這麼糾結 orz …… 我只在穩定的段落做了改動，奇葩的地方都是照抄的
  4. 03:13:387 (1,2) - ^
  5. 03:16:666 (1,2) - ^
  6. 03:33:061 (3) - missing clap on the slider's tail.……fix ~
  7. 04:11:837 (3) - remove this finish? i can't see any emphasis here.……ok ~
  8. 05:37:351 (1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2) - no hitsounds here? it's better to add finishs or claps on these note. In my opinion, I would like to add claps on 05:37:351 (1,1,1,1,1) - these circles.……都加上了 ><
  9. 05:45:851 (2,3) - no sliderslide on this?……加了√
  10. 06:07:017 (2) - missing clap on this slider's head. …… fix ~
  11. 06:09:684 (3) - ^…… fix
  12. 06:31:254 (3) - miss clap on the slider's tail.…… fix ~
  13. 06:40:190 (4) - ^…… fix ~
  14. 06:41:626 (3) - missing clap. Did you miss them on purpose? but it sounds a bit weird.……不，手動總有紕漏orz
  15. 06:59:291 (2) - add whistle?……ok
  16. 08:07:458 (6) - add clap on the slider's head like you did on 08:05:458 (4) - this?…… ok ~
  17. 08:08:791 (3) - ^ on the tail…… fix ~
  18. 08:24:124 (1,2) - add finish on both slider's head to emphasise the sound(i don't know what's this.. …… e……
  19. 09:00:763 (1) - why you added finish instead of whistle? pls change to whistle sinceyou did at 08:59:124 (1,1) - fix √
  20. 11:19:583 - add clap for consistency.…………ok
  21. 13:44:681 (1) - Though you add whistle, i still suggest you to add clap for consistency.……ok
:) star.


very thx mod ::>_<::
ErunamoJAZZ
osu! Alumni
2,693 posts
Joined August 2012
ErunamoJAZZ
Hello!

In SB, you can cut the End.jpg, you are only using the bottom section.


[Calendula]
About hitsounds... emm... i was a bit... disappointed u.u, because you overwrite the whistles with a custom hitsound xD... i think you notice my way for place hitsounds when you mod my mapset, i would have wanted add whistles when the violins/piano are heard... lol, but i know this is A LOT of work... u.u
  1. 03:29:231 (4,1) - 03:41:997 (4,1) - 06:27:424 (4,1) - 09:18:238 (4,1) - 09:31:004 (4,1) - This antijumps a very anti-climax imo :/ Imo, is better if you make jump.
  2. 04:47:352 (1,2) - 04:50:352 (4,1) - mm... this is not a bad way, but is too simple u.u, i want to ask why dont try to map the voice way, is more interesting xD
  3. 04:54:352 (5) - bass way?:
  4. 05:10:268 - pls, consider add a note here.
  5. 06:59:291 (2) - 07:00:624 (2) - i understand you use 1.8x bc the jump, but, playing, this was difficut to read. A spacing to 1.5x feels better for me.
  6. 06:59:625 - mm... pls, consider try it:
  7. 07:01:125 (1) - bc 1) polarity, 2) this feel and listen fine, pls, consider a triple here:
  8. 07:22:625 (2) - what do you think about a Ctrl+G? http://puu.sh/hvQ5m/a60e333907.jpg
  9. 07:26:958 - a circle here? for guitar.
  10. 07:44:958 - mm... the drum start here :/
  11. 09:21:270 (1) - and the finish? lol, sorry, im not aware of the hitsounds ^^U
  12. 08:04:124 (1) - mm.. i know you are following the voice, but idk, may be this could be of your interest:
  13. 08:09:624 - a note here?
  14. 08:26:124 - move the start break to here?
  15. 09:57:254 - mm... mmm... a note here will be cool bc the guitar... but will take many work xD
  16. 10:29:252 (1) - flow feels more comfortable with Ctrl+G
  17. 11:27:748 (2) - mm... mmm... im not sure what are you following here... maybe a circle in the white tick is better?
  18. 11:48:245 - the piano here feels strong, i think will be good idea some like Ctrl+G to 11:48:078 (4,5) - (not moving places :P)
  19. 11:51:244 (1) - idk what do you think about some like this? xD http://puu.sh/hvSla/2ef98664f3.jpg
  20. 12:21:111 (4,5) - for improve reading, pls, consider move like http://puu.sh/hvSB0/3f6efcf0d0.jpg
  21. 13:08:352 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16) - lol, overmapping?
  22. About SB, why not use in the end a similar effect like in 10:32:056 - , but with blue dots up to top??

Really a very nice map, veru intuituive >:3
Good luck with rank!!!
Narcissu
1,744 posts
Joined August 2012
Topic Starter
Narcissu

ErunamoJAZZ wrote:

Hello!

In SB, you can cut the End.jpg, you are only using the bottom section. …… fix ~


[Calendula]
About hitsounds... emm... i was a bit... disappointed u.u, because you overwrite the whistles with a custom hitsound xD... i think you notice my way for place hitsounds when you mod my mapset, i would have wanted add whistles when the violins/piano are heard... lol, but i know this is A LOT of work... u.u ……i dislike normal-hitwhistle Orz …… and use same whistle follow paino that different pitch & volume …… a litter strange ??
  1. 03:29:231 (4,1) - 03:41:997 (4,1) - 06:27:424 (4,1) - 09:18:238 (4,1) - 09:31:004 (4,1) - This antijumps a very anti-climax imo :/ Imo, is better if you make jump.…… yes it's anti-climax orz …… but voice pause here , i think it's follow music ??
  2. 04:47:352 (1,2) - 04:50:352 (4,1) - mm... this is not a bad way, but is too simple u.u, i want to ask why dont try to map the voice way, is more interesting xD …… ok , i try follow voice with bass
  3. 04:54:352 (5) - bass way?: …… yeye
  4. 05:10:268 - pls, consider add a note here. …… ok ~
  5. 06:59:291 (2) - 07:00:624 (2) - i understand you use 1.8x bc the jump, but, playing, this was difficut to read. A spacing to 1.5x feels better for me. …… although i want change …… i need 10 minutes to fix 1 note because the storyboard …… im lazy ::>_<::
  6. 06:59:625 - mm... pls, consider try it: …… ^ …… i'm sorry Orz , i will change it other point ><
  7. 07:01:125 (1) - bc 1) polarity, 2) this feel and listen fine, pls, consider a triple here:
  8. 07:22:625 (2) - what do you think about a Ctrl+G? http://puu.sh/hvQ5m/a60e333907.jpg …… ok
  9. 07:26:958 - a circle here? for guitar. …… ok
  10. 07:44:958 - mm... the drum start here :/ …… …… add a note ><
  11. 09:21:270 (1) - and the finish? lol, sorry, im not aware of the hitsounds ^^U …… fix
  12. 08:04:124 (1) - mm.. i know you are following the voice, but idk, may be this could be of your interest:……ok , note more and more 233
  13. 08:09:624 - a note here?……ok
  14. 08:26:124 - move the start break to here? ……ok
  15. 09:57:254 - mm... mmm... a note here will be cool bc the guitar... but will take many work xD …… i think drum >> guitar here …… 3-hit is puzzle
  16. 10:29:252 (1) - flow feels more comfortable with Ctrl+G……ok
  17. 11:27:748 (2) - mm... mmm... im not sure what are you following here... maybe a circle in the white tick is better?……1/4 not suitable for the quiet part in my opinion ……
  18. 11:48:245 - the piano here feels strong, i think will be good idea some like Ctrl+G to 11:48:078 (4,5) - (not moving places :P) …… LOL …… ok ,
  19. 11:51:244 (1) - idk what do you think about some like this? xD http://puu.sh/hvSla/2ef98664f3.jpg……a……i make some different point transition ……
  20. 12:21:111 (4,5) - for improve reading, pls, consider move like http://puu.sh/hvSB0/3f6efcf0d0.jpg……ok
  21. 13:08:352 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16) - lol, overmapping? …… yeye , i think overmap stream before downbeat is ok
  22. About SB, why not use in the end a similar effect like in 10:32:056 - , but with blue dots up to top?? …… sorry i write english by Google translation …… i can't understand it 111

Really a very nice map, veru intuituive >:3
Good luck with rank!!! …… but i cant find BN LOL
thx mod ::>_<::
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