NoHitter wrote:

In case you guys want to read the OP's post alone to read the story: http://osu.ppy.sh/forum/search.php?auth ... 5&t=181983

Brian you may want to place that link in the opening post.

You can't tell me what to do




CYOA thread is getting discontinued for being a trainwreck, same drill as before though. The earlier thread was just a test to see how you guys would take this nonsense. Anyway


Hundreds of thoughts run through your mind. You're in an unusual uniform walking up to a boarding school you've only dreamed of. You never thought you'd have an aptitude for rhythm and get scouted into one of the most prestigious rhythm-based academies in the world for it—osu! Academy. It was a chance you couldn't pass up, but it also meant discarding your past life. Your friends, your hometown, and your family are all out of your reach. Well, you don't mind the friends bit since you don't have any.

Your father's only thoughts on the matter were "it's your mother's fault" as he scratched the back of his head while making sure he didn't pack in any of your third-rate pornography.

You shrug and step inside the school, where your vision opens up to a large, three-story hall. Wooden staircases and railings wind upwards to the sides, leading to unexplored floors and hallways. Sunlight peers through the tall windows and bounces off the polished floor almost making it too bright for an early morning. The hall itself is devoid of life, and its silence weighs down on you. Everybody's probably in their classrooms, but such a large, alien space should not be so empty. You can't help but feel somewhat alone.

This is a new school you're attending though, it's to be expected. You'll meet plenty of nice people along the way. You try to calm yourself with this thought as you take another step into the hall.

"Mr. Marinkovich?" a voice calls out to you from the side, stopping you dead cold.

"Huh? Oh." You turn to find a finely dressed bearded man, probably in his thirties or so, giving you a light smile. He is tall and slim, with eyes that seem to contain all the grace of the world. The only thing that's really bothering you about him would be the halo on his head and the golden aura around him.

"Hey, that's you isn't it?" The man asks.

"Yeah, I'm Shirou Marinkovich." You say, trying to avert your gaze.

"I'm Jesus. You can call me Jesse if you want, since I'll be your homeroom teacher from now on."

"W-Well..." You lower your head and bow to the man in front of you. "Nice to meet you... er..."

You pause, widening your eyes in desperation as you search for an answer—

What the fuck, how're you supposed to address this guy?! Is he actually the son of God? Aren't you technically witnessing a miracle?

[] Professor Christ
[] Genuflect
[] Jesus
[] Jesse
[] Professor Jesus

Professor Jesus
"RELIGION BAN RELIGION IS AGAINST THE ROOLS" -blaze

genuflect

''You can call me Jesse''

then fucking call him jesse you despicable sons of bitches.

Genuflect. Then call him jesse

Professor Jesus

Jenucide

Genuflect bitch.

genufuck

genuflect

Jesus has comanded us to call him Jesse lest you burn in hell.

Professor Christ

Jesse, you fucks.

When I try to type Jesse my hands don't listen and instead they type Jesse. It feels like I'm being brainwashed by Jesse.

editing...

also, jesse ofc

*sigh*

Can we ban Trash Boat from this thread please?

from all threads*

Genuflect.

"... Jesse." you finish your sentence, avoiding a completely awkward introduction.

"Nice to meet you too." Jesus pats you on the shoulder, probably happy that you've addressed him casually. [Homeroom Teacher +1]

Voice
Suddenly it hits you. Your palms are sweaty; knees weak; and arms are heavy. You vomit on your conveniently placed ugly sweater and get on your hands and knees in front of your homeroom teacher. You instinctively genuflect thinking of your mom's spaghetti. She sucks at making spaghetti.

"Whoa." Jesus grabs your arms and pulls you up. Your strength returns immediately, and you apologize just as quickly.

"Sorry, I felt a bit light-headed."

"You alright? The nurse's office is just down the hall."

"N-No, I'm fine, I think it was just..." You stop for a moment, thinking back on why you genuflected at all. The feeling was strange; as if you were possessed by some evil spirit or something.. You doubt a nurse could help with that. You decide to go by your family's default reply: "It was my mom's fault."

"I perfectly understand." Jesus nods and waits for a moment. "Well, let's introduce you to the class then. Come on, follow me."

"Ah, okay." You say as you follow Jesus up the stairs to the second floor and into one of the unfamiliar hallways. You dispose of the dirty sweater on a trash bin along the way.

The well-dressed teacher walks down the surprisingly dark hallway as you follow suit. You pass by posters, boards, and classrooms, though the darkness doesn't let you focus on anything very well. There are no windows and the lights seem to be off. The only thing settling you down would be the sound of your footsteps and the walking light bulb in front of you. You feel tempted to ask, but you feel like you're better off not knowing.

"Sorry, mechanic said he'd fix the lights today, but you can't expect much from that guy to begin with." Jesus breaks the silence. "So, you want to do the introductions?" He adds, stopping right next to a door. Inane chatter can be heard from the other side.

"I'll do it." You man up and follow Jesus into the classroom.

The window on the side lets in a healthy amount of light into the room, at least compared to the dreary hallway. You note about two dozen students in the classroom, half of them hurrying to their desks at the sight of their homeroom teacher. Jesus walks up to face the class, you stand by his side. The students take their seats and prepare for homeroom while Jesus waits.

You take a good look at the class while they inspect you, save for the napping students. The class is mostly made up of foreigners, though you can't bother to identify them one by one. You can tell at a glance that they've practically got every ethnicity covered in here.

"Quiet everybody, we got a new student in here." Jesus nods at you.

You nod back and take a step forward.

"Hi, I'm Shirou Marinkovich. I'm a new student from Russia, though I'm half-Japanese. Pleasure to meet you."

Yep, short and simple. To finish, you ought to...

[] Bow and step back.
[] Kick over the podium and finish.
[] Genuflect.
[] Ask to be seated next to the window in the back row.

kick over the podium and finish.

followed by genuflection.

obviously aiming for off topic route here.

You've gotta keep with the genuflecting theme here. They'll think it's some half-russian half-japanese custom or something. Which is cool. Which will get you laid.

Kicking down the podium will make them think you're communist

Kanye West wrote:

You've gotta keep with the genuflecting theme here. They'll think it's some half-russian half-japanese custom or something. Which is cool. Which will get you laid.

Kicking down the podium will make them think you're communist

kicking the podium will lead to the off topic route.

the off topic route is obviously the goal. nobody plays for the chicks man.

Tanzklaue wrote:

Kanye West wrote:

You've gotta keep with the genuflecting theme here. They'll think it's some half-russian half-japanese custom or something. Which is cool. Which will get you laid.

Kicking down the podium will make them think you're communist

kicking the podium will lead to the off topic route.

the off topic route is obviously the goal. nobody plays for the chicks man.

Ah, the international bestseller "Why I'm Still Single" - by Tanzklaue

genuflect

Ask to be seated next to the window in the back row.

Bow and step back.
Aiming for that typical main character "Plain and not so interesting guy" image.

kick over the podium and finish