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Status Update

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Status: real nervous for Takeuchi. MissingNo. is an excellent contestant, and he has much support behind him. It's about a 60/40 split, judging from the comments on the battle video. Man, this is starting to get to me, hehe.
Status: I just keep wanting to practise Turkish but I don't think I could focus. :/
Playing a game
Status: just changed my sig!
Status: Just started procrastinating
Status: it's raining pretty hard outside.
Status: I've been playing around with VGM Music Maker today, trying to recreate this song:

I can place the notes pretty well, and I have all the metadata set up (BPM, etc.), but I can't seem to recreate the instruments very well. The four FM synthesis sine wave modulation channels are kinda hard to use. I also don't know how to have the whole drumset on one channel, like on this song from Knuckles' Chaotix. Looks like I'm going to have to do some research and/or ask for some help, especially with the drums.

Edit: this video is very helpful!


Achromalia wrote:

That already looks amazing, I can't wait to see the final result!
I have this song stuck in my head, HALP:


Achromalia wrote:

i feel fucking terrible... heh. hah. fuck.

it's fairly difficult to describe, it's not really something i'd chalk up as depression, it's not self-hatred, it's like...

disappointment, but... not really.

disappointed that this is life. it's the most pointless thing to feel about life as it doesn't exactly change the parameters of life itself, but still.

i miss the past. i'm getting nostalgic, but it's not necessarily nostalgia.

it's a bit like... sonder. or... something.

it's knowing that i could've taken many choices to live many different lives, realizing that the choices i've already made have only led me here. it's not a new concept, but...

i miss her. i miss them. i miss middle school, and how fucking terrible it was. i miss my depressed and apathetic self.

i miss the level of imagination i had. i want to live all of these lives, see what others see, see things differently, do things differently and see what happens, see what i can change, what i can improve, what i can prevent or protect.

i miss the specific quantum states of which i would find myself in the past, even if i've never experienced it. i can only imagine it, and dream about it, but never really see it.


i want to play god, essentially, heh. i don't really care for destruction or anything extravagant, although i'd like to create some things and see how that plays out, but i really would like something like omniscience and omnipresence, and the ability to make quantum leaps in time states, to experience everything.

maybe i'd get bored.

that's okay.

as long as i don't mess anything up.

but i'd like to see these possibilities in my reality.


yet, here i am.

i don't know.

i don't even feel human, sometimes.

it's like i'm a disembodied entity housed in an inseparable physical form that i'm too distracted to care for.

that's technically a viable definition of a conscience or an ego, by the looks of it.

i just feel so detached. i feel so distant from everything, from everyone.

i remember just how lonely i am.

it's cold out here.

it's empty in here.

there's nothing in here, but me, and everything's out there. here, i'm looking outwards into everything that surrounds me, yet, i feel like i'm more like an observer, peering into a reality that i've yet to fully understand.

i'm tired.

i think that's enough.

i'll probably just... lay here, or... something.

i don't know.

so inert.

so familiar.

so tired.

just here.

me, this reality, and the void.
Status: song of the day that is stuck in my head:

Status: I just choked on my water. I was reading some funny comment and laughed while drinking water and since I didn't want to spit out the water I forced myself to drink it and choked quite hard on it. Damn this hurt.
I've got two interviews for two different things on two different days. i hope i don't get two nervous. i'm hoping two handle these two interviews well. one of them starts at one PM and ends at two PM. then after interview number one on day one i have interview number two on day two. i one-der how these two are gonna go.
Doing maths homework in the first time in forever and getting agitated at WW3 news that keeps getting recommended to me on my phone.
Status: I found this house mix yesterday night and now I'm listening to it today.

I thought Monstercat having house was weird, because what Monstercat usually hosts and what I like about house are two totally different things. I'm about ten minutes in and I was right. The description calls it "progressive house". I don't know what it means, but I don't really like it. I much prefer soulful house or J-house, such as the music in this mix:

I really like this one.
Yeah, I listened to another progressive house mix and it's not really my style. It's like if you had a house—electro slider, and you set it to 25% house 75% electro.

I found another great house mix, though. This one isn't the soulful house I usually listen to, but it's still really good. It's like if you set the slider to 50% house 50% electro. It reminds me of something you might find on a radio station in a racing game. It's nice to listen to.

"With all held dear, we aspire to be better.

Against all fear, to passion's fire we are tethered."
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