1. Easy (2,43 stars, 92 notes)
2. Hard (4,9 stars, 225 notes)
3. Normal (4,35 stars, 126 notes)
4. P A N's Insane (5 stars, 300 notes)
5. Reality (5 stars, 371 notes)

Momochikun wrote:

tiada pertamax diantara kita~

1. I don't really know whether you need an epilepsy warning or not since this SB has maaaaany pulses.

1. 00:19:831 (1) - End the spinner on 00:21:383 -. You can hear it if you slow the music down to 25%.
2. 00:33:073 (1) - Blanket issue! Move the slidertail to x25 y100.
3. 00:35:556 (3) - Position this slider at x188 y212 for a better transition in this pattern.
4. 00:43:004 (1,2,3,4) - You had a chance to make a wonderful square pattern right here but you were like NOPE!
5. 00:57:900 (1) - Place the one in a straight line with the previous slider to increase the flow.
   SPOILER

   
6. 01:06:176 (2) - Blanket issue! I know that you wanted to keep the consistency by using the same slider, but please fix this slider so the blanket looks better.
7. 01:21:073 (1,2) - This small pattern doesn't look too good since you overrotated the slider. How about something like this?
   SPOILER

   

1. 00:18:176 (1) - This slider doesn't really fit too much how about this?
   SPOILER

   
2. 00:38:038 (4) - Distance issue! Please fix this.
3. 00:25:625 (6,1) - Why aren't these sliders the same :S
4. 00:26:452 (1,2) - This positioning of the sliders look ugly. Change them to something similar to this:
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:29:762 (1) - How about moving the return point a little bit more towards the top to increase the flow?
   SPOILER

   
6. 00:36:383 (1,2) - Why didn't you use the same sliders here?
7. 00:41:349 (4,5) - The flow here is kinda... meh. There are two possibilities I came up with.
   SPOILER

   
   
8. 00:44:659 (4) - Flip this slider so the return point points up instead of down. This icnreases the flow.
9. 00:50:452 (2) - This slider doesn't quite follow the music so you could do it like this instead.
   SPOILER

   
10. 00:53:762 (5,6,1) - I am not really satisfied with this pattern as it could look way better. The (6) is at the wrong position making the transition (5,6,1) look just awkward. Use this.
    SPOILER

    
11. 00:58:521 (2) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x322 y220 and the slidertail to x375 y303.
12. 01:12:797 (3) - Looks better if it's symmetrical imo.
13. 01:14:452 (1,2,3,4) - It seems like you wanted to do a mirrored pattern here. Unfortunately you placed either the (3) or the (4) wrong. Do it like one of the two possibilities. In the first one, I put the (3) higher than the (2) since the (4) is also higher than the (1). In the second one I just put (4) on the same height as (1). Also, why did you flip the (4) vertically? It looks better if you leave the shape.
    SPOILER

    

1. 00:05:969 (2,3,4,1) - Maaaan I don't know about this... It starts off as an almost straight line and then takes a huge turn. It just doesn't looks really good. I would say that you should take the suggestion from Unsfamiliar.
2. 00:06:590 (1,2,3,4) - This pattern looks somehow boring. How about something like this?
   SPOILER

   
3. 00:14:038 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x438 y129.
4. 00:15:590 (4,5,6) - This pattern could be more exciting - like this:
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:16:935 (2) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x211 y156 and the slidertail to x272 y114.
6. 00:19:625 (4,1) - It's not clear for the player whether this rhythm stays or shortens. So please shorten the distance between these two circles. Something like this could be done:
   SPOILER

   
7. 00:23:969 (4) - Move this slider to x320 y348 for a better flow.
8. 00:30:590 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x402 y225 and the slidertail to x367 y157.
9. 00:31:831 (3) - This pattern gets a better flow if the slider plays the other way (CTRL + J-ish)
   SPOILER

   
10. 00:34:728 (1) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x404 y277 and the slidertail to x334 y231.
11. 00:38:038 (1,2,3) - Perhaps you should make the spacing consistent here?
12. 00:45:073 (2) - Move this one 2 grids to the right as it just looks better that way.
13. 00:52:314 - Remove the clap here!
14. 00:54:176 (6) - I would move the slider over there to keep the flow and also to keep the distance you were using.
    SPOILER

    
15. 00:56:245 (1,3) - Why aren't these two slider equally close the the (2)? >-<
16. 01:01:211 (1) - I would rotate the slider by 25° Clockwise and put him back to his original position to increase the flow for the following notes.
17. 01:06:797 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x487 y220 and the slidertail to x414 y163.
18. 01:22:211 (3) - Move this slider 1 grid up and 1 grid right to make this pattern look smoother.

1. 00:01:935 (2,3) - I wouldn't put these circles in a straight horizontal line to the slider since it just doesn't fit. The player goes (thanks to the curve of the slider) a bit more towards down-right instead of straight right so consider placin them like this:
   SPOILER

   
2. 00:03:900 (4) - How about moving the slidertail to x341 y276? It increases the flow on the following notes. If you want to keep that sexy curve you could also move the slider ankle point to x232 y320.
3. 00:07:418 (2,2) - Why didn't you do those sliders symmetrical? Like, with CTRL + H + J.
4. 00:19:004 (2,3,4,5,6,1) - These notes don't really fit if you follow the beats. You should use something like this:
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:28:935 (1,2,3,4,5) - Could you change this into a more consistent stream please? It just looks so awkward right now.
6. 00:39:176 (5) - Place this slider more down to follow the direction of the previous slider. (x144 y148)
   SPOILER

   
7. 00:39:487 (6,7,1) - This plays good, but it could be improved if you don't make such a sharp edge with the (7).
8. 00:45:073 (1) - Remove the NC.
9. 00:45:900 (1) - You should also remove the NC here.
10. 00:47:452 (5,6,1,2,3) - Please make this stream in a line with the previous slider. It just looks way better.
11. 00:47:659 (1) - Remove the NC.
12. 00:55:211 (4) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x257 y140 and the slidertail to x319 y194.
13. 01:03:693 (1,2,3,4) - Holy shit lol.

1. 00:14:866 (6) - A NC would be fitting here.
2. 00:18:797 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9) - Are you serious. You just got Haya's overmap of the day reward. Not seriously, even if it took you some effort to make the stream looks that good, you should map it another way.
3. 00:32:245 (4) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x415 y124 and the slidertail to x355 y198.
4. 00:44:245 (3) - This pattern looks kind of boring if the slider is placed on the same X-value as the previous slider. How about something like this?
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:49:418 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - Holy shit please spare me.
6. 00:52:314 - Add a circle here.
7. 00:55:418 (1) - Remove the NC here and use it here 00:56:245 -
8. 01:00:590 - You should probably add a circle here.
9. 01:11:142 (4) - Using a NC here would be appropriate.
10. 01:13:625 (4) - Small Blanket issue! Move the slidertail to x384 y98.

Haya wrote:

Herrow :3

[General]

1. I don't really know whether you need an epilepsy warning or not since this SB has maaaaany pulses.

[Easy]

1. 00:19:831 (1) - End the spinner on 00:21:383 -. You can hear it if you slow the music down to 25%. but i heard off music in stanza so end in stanza, will change if someone tell about this too
2. 00:33:073 (1) - Blanket issue! Move the slidertail to x25 y100. okay
3. 00:35:556 (3) - Position this slider at x188 y212 for a better transition in this pattern. it's fine imo and then 188,212 make a spacing issue
4. 00:43:004 (1,2,3,4) - You had a chance to make a wonderful square pattern right here but you were like NOPE! lol i'm not see this, fixed
5. 00:57:900 (1) - Place the one in a straight line with the previous slider to increase the flow. nice, fixed
   SPOILER

   
6. 01:06:176 (2) - Blanket issue! I know that you wanted to keep the consistency by using the same slider, but please fix this slider so the blanket looks better. try as i can
7. 01:21:073 (1,2) - This small pattern doesn't look too good since you overrotated the slider. How about something like this? okay
   SPOILER

   

[Normal]

1. 00:18:176 (1) - This slider doesn't really fit too much how about this? fixed
   SPOILER

   
2. 00:38:038 (4) - Distance issue! Please fix this. fixed
3. 00:25:625 (6,1) - Why aren't these sliders the same :S because blanket in 00:23:969 (3,6) -
4. 00:26:452 (1,2) - This positioning of the sliders look ugly. Change them to something similar to this: changed somehow
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:29:762 (1) - How about moving the return point a little bit more towards the top to increase the flow? cute,fixed
   SPOILER

   
6. 00:36:383 (1,2) - Why didn't you use the same sliders here? that's not really important ahaha
7. 00:41:349 (4,5) - The flow here is kinda... meh. There are two possibilities I came up with. [/color]
   SPOILER

   
   
8. 00:44:659 (4) - Flip this slider so the return point points up instead of down. This icnreases the flow. k
9. 00:50:452 (2) - This slider doesn't quite follow the music so you could do it like this instead. imo fine and yours it's so hard for normal
   SPOILER

   
10. 00:53:762 (5,6,1) - I am not really satisfied with this pattern as it could look way better. The (6) is at the wrong position making the transition (5,6,1) look just awkward. Use this. fixed by my own
    SPOILER

    
11. 00:58:521 (2) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x322 y220 and the slidertail to x375 y303. changed as i can
12. 01:12:797 (3) - Looks better if it's symmetrical imo. try as i can
13. 01:14:452 (1,2,3,4) - It seems like you wanted to do a mirrored pattern here. Unfortunately you placed either the (3) or the (4) wrong. Do it like one of the two possibilities. In the first one, I put the (3) higher than the (2) since the (4) is also higher than the (1). In the second one I just put (4) on the same height as (1). Also, why did you flip the (4) vertically? It looks better if you leave the shape. will change if someone tell this again
    SPOILER

    

[Hard]

1. 00:05:969 (2,3,4,1) - Maaaan I don't know about this... It starts off as an almost straight line and then takes a huge turn. It just doesn't looks really good. I would say that you should take the suggestion from Unsfamiliar.
2. 00:06:590 (1,2,3,4) - This pattern looks somehow boring. How about something like this?
   SPOILER

   
3. 00:14:038 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x438 y129. fixed all above and this
4. 00:15:590 (4,5,6) - This pattern could be more exciting - like this: will be bad flow, imo mine is fine
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:16:935 (2) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x211 y156 and the slidertail to x272 y114. changed by my own
6. 00:19:625 (4,1) - It's not clear for the player whether this rhythm stays or shortens. So please shorten the distance between these two circles. Something like this could be done: nope, change spacing have a NC so it can read clearly imo
   SPOILER

   
7. 00:23:969 (4) - Move this slider to x320 y348 for a better flow. hmm, not bad too for mine o.o
8. 00:30:590 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x402 y225 and the slidertail to x367 y157. errr actually i prefer mine
9. 00:31:831 (3) - This pattern gets a better flow if the slider plays the other way (CTRL + J-ish) okay
   SPOILER

   
10. 00:34:728 (1) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x404 y277 and the slidertail to x334 y231. changed by my own
11. 00:38:038 (1,2,3) - Perhaps you should make the spacing consistent here? seems fine imo , based vocal so keep this first
12. 00:45:073 (2) - Move this one 2 grids to the right as it just looks better that way. okay
13. 00:52:314 - Remove the clap here! fine
14. 00:54:176 (6) - I would move the slider over there to keep the flow and also to keep the distance you were using. okay
    SPOILER

    
15. 00:56:245 (1,3) - Why aren't these two slider equally close the the (2)? >-< >-< (?)
16. 01:01:211 (1) - I would rotate the slider by 25° Clockwise and put him back to his original position to increase the flow for the following notes. okay
17. 01:06:797 (3) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x487 y220 and the slidertail to x414 y163. other time if people say this again
18. 01:22:211 (3) - Move this slider 1 grid up and 1 grid right to make this pattern look smoother.okay

[My Reality]

1. 00:01:935 (2,3) - I wouldn't put these circles in a straight horizontal line to the slider since it just doesn't fit. The player goes (thanks to the curve of the slider) a bit more towards down-right instead of straight right so consider placin them like this:
   SPOILER

   
2. 00:03:900 (4) - How about moving the slidertail to x341 y276? It increases the flow on the following notes. If you want to keep that sexy curve you could also move the slider ankle point to x232 y320.
3. 00:07:418 (2,2) - Why didn't you do those sliders symmetrical? Like, with CTRL + H + J.
4. 00:19:004 (2,3,4,5,6,1) - These notes don't really fit if you follow the beats. You should use something like this:
   SPOILER

   
5. 00:28:935 (1,2,3,4,5) - Could you change this into a more consistent stream please? It just looks so awkward right now.
6. 00:39:176 (5) - Place this slider more down to follow the direction of the previous slider. (x144 y148)
   SPOILER

   
7. 00:39:487 (6,7,1) - This plays good, but it could be improved if you don't make such a sharp edge with the (7).
8. 00:45:073 (1) - Remove the NC.
9. 00:45:900 (1) - You should also remove the NC here.
10. 00:47:452 (5,6,1,2,3) - Please make this stream in a line with the previous slider. It just looks way better.
11. 00:47:659 (1) - Remove the NC.
12. 00:55:211 (4) - Blanket issue! Move the slider ankle point to x257 y140 and the slidertail to x319 y194.
13. 01:03:693 (1,2,3,4) - Holy shit lol. almost fixed all, just reject NC due just to make easier read that 1/4 jump

That's it! While playing I threw my pen out of the window and a magical star appeared! ~★~ <3
Nice mapset and good luck :3

• 00:28:107 (3) - move to (196,160)
  00:29:762 (1,2) - exchange NC
  00:41:349 (3) - straight slider
  00:45:487 (4) - move to (164,280)
  00:56:659 (3) - move to (316,52)
  00:57:073 (4) - move to (412,46) and a little bent
  
  
  [Normal]
  
  • 00:10:521 (4) - remove
    00:59:349 - add circle
    
    
    [Hard]
    
    • 00:19:831 (1) - remove NC
      
      
      [My Reality]
      
      • 00:26:659 (2,3) - jump ?
        00:41:659 (1,2) - exchange NC
        00:45:073 (1) - remove NC
        01:03:693 (1,2,3,4) - overlapping
        
        
        [P A N's Insane]
        
        • Good

Desperate-kun wrote:

Mod from queue ~ :3

[Easy + Normal]

No problems here, very good (:

[Hard]

00:09:487 (5,6,1) - Why are there different distances here? jump ofc
00:11:142 (4,5,1) - ^ ^
00:50:556 (2) - I think it's a little bit confusing to read... most players will click at the white or red tick. I suggest giving 1 another reverse and remap it a bit.
know it but it's follow vocal. will see others opinion


~~~

Very, very nice map, can't find much problems at all! You got my star ^^

1. Err, kayaknya lebih bagus kalau volume di awal lagu sampai 00:23:038 dinaikin, maybe? Sekarang kurang kedengeran ah rasanya...

1. 00:09:487 (3,4) - Err, distance 1,06x?
2. 00:16:107 - Tambah clap juga pls *hides*
3. 00:32:245 (5,1) - Blanket di sini gak gitu bagus, IMO.
4. 00:49:625 (1) - Umm, tambah whistle di kepala sama ekor, lalu finish di 00:49:625? *hides again*
5. 00:56:245 (2,3,4) - Menurutku sih pattern ini kurang rapi. Coba dibikin seperti ini?
6. 01:16:107 - Finish?

1. 00:06:176 - Whistle untuk nekanin vokal? (Baru nyadar kerasa sepi di sini...)
2. 00:35:556 (5,1) - Buat aku, flow bakal lebih bagus di sini kalau diginiin.
3. 00:49:625 - Add finish~
4. 01:02:038 - IMO sih ini mestinya di-map, soalnya bunyi cymbal di sini kuat banget. Kalau dilewatin rasanya aneh. Gak mungkin kan ngikut vokal terus tapi instrumen kuat ginian dilewatin lol
5. 01:24:383 - Err, di Easy kan ini di-map pake slider... Kok di sini pake spinner? Kesannya gak konsisten gitu~

1. 00:49:625 - Yep, add finish juga kk.
2. 00:55:211 (3,1) - Dua slider ini saling nyentuh satu sama lain; nampak aneh kalau main...
3. 00:58:935 - Tambah circle untuk ngikutin instrumen di sini dong; rasanya kosong dan bikin permainan gak enak kalau gak ada apa-apa.
4. 01:23:659 - Hmm, coba tambah circle lagi untuk ngasih penekanan buat ending lagunya? Biar akhir map-nya terasa lebih fun gitu~ Also biar sama kayak 01:04:107 (2,3,4,5,1).

1. To be honest, I find the lack of hitsounds in most of the section (and the wrong usage of them at times) really bugging me. Seriously, consider to add a lot more whistles and finishes at the beginning, and also just use the usual hitsound pattern of 1-3 whistle/2-4 clap here with some necessary finishes after 00:08:245; it fits the music a lot. This also helps the 1/4 patterns at 00:19:831 - 00:21:487 to work better than how they are now. And yes, get more finishes when necessary, and only use those custom whistles at the first half (silent part) of the verse.
2. Your combo pattern in the kiai time is completely random. Please make them consistent by any way possible.
3. 00:20:245 (3,4,1) - The spacing change here can get really confusing. No, I'm serious, this is extremely hard to read.
4. 00:21:487 - ...Now that I think of it again, 20% is just too inaudible for this part. Consider increasing the volume here.
5. 00:34:728 (6,7,8,9,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2) - Considering the spacing between (7) and (8) here is almost twice of the light gray (1) and (2), but they are spaced the same visually, players might think of the latter pattern (the 1,2 one) as a jump that's as big as (7) and (8), and there's a good chance that once they finished the stream in the middle, the rushing feeling the stream gives will make you think that 00:36:383 (1,2) is a jump too, like the pattern before it. Try to solve this by yourself, I guess?
6. 00:49:418 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - ...This is uncomfortable to play for me. Maybe try to play this by yourself and detect if there's any overmapping? I'm not sure to be honest, but I think some parts are overmapped.
7. 00:51:797 - This spot is also overmapped, making the 00:51:590 (2) slider very awkward to play. Just saying.
8. 00:58:728 (1,2,3,4,5) - This jumping star pattern doesn't fit to the power of the music here, IMO.
9. 01:01:625 (3,4) - I also find the extremely big jump here unnecessary... Like, seriously, you should reduce it to, maybe, 2.00x or something around it, because the music's power here is not that high.
10. 01:09:693 (1,2,3,4) - Just saying: The flow here is awkward because you have to hit a 1/4 slider followed by a circle... I mean, you just hit a really small short slider, and suddenly you have to hit a circle, and then you have to repeat them. This makes an awkward play, IMO...
11. 01:11:762 (3) - Make this a 1/4 slider + 1 repeat instead so you can follow the vocal and instruments at once? Feels awkward to leave the vocal on the blue tick unmapped.
12. 01:21:073 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - The jumps here are really random. The music doesn't call for a chain of jumps that gradually gets bigger every note.

1. 00:03:693 (3) - Pola di sini bakal kelihatan lebih rapi kalau ini dipindah ke (124,120).
2. 00:13:935 (1,2,3) - Umm, coba Ctrl+G buat ritmenya? Terasa jauh lebih pas dari yang sekarang.
3. 00:16:521 (1,2) - Ritme ini lebih cocok dengan vokalnya.
4. 01:16:831 (1,2) - Uh, IMO, 1/4 jump di sini rasanya gak pas banget, terlalu tiba-tiba gitu...

Hinsvar wrote:

Mod \o/

>General

1. Err, kayaknya lebih bagus kalau volume di awal lagu sampai 00:23:038 dinaikin, maybe? Sekarang kurang kedengeran ah rasanya... udah d naikin jadi 50% pas d mod Mochi

>Easy

1. 00:09:487 (3,4) - Err, distance 1,06x? ew, fixed
2. 00:16:107 - Tambah clap juga pls *hides* hitsounder nya payah
3. 00:32:245 (5,1) - Blanket di sini gak gitu bagus, IMO. siapa yang mau bikin blanket? orang itu random kok
4. 00:49:625 (1) - Umm, tambah whistle di kepala sama ekor, lalu finish di 00:49:625? *hides again* hitsounder nya payah (2)
5. 00:56:245 (2,3,4) - Menurutku sih pattern ini kurang rapi. Coba dibikin seperti ini? ganti tp gk kea SS
6. 01:16:107 - Finish? hitsounder nya payah (3)

>Normal

1. 00:06:176 - Whistle untuk nekanin vokal? (Baru nyadar kerasa sepi di sini...) hitsounder nya payah (4)
2. 00:35:556 (5,1) - Buat aku, flow bakal lebih bagus di sini kalau diginiin. nyaris gk ada bedanya, ganti sukasuka.com
3. 00:49:625 - Add finish~ hitsounder nya payah (5)
4. 01:02:038 - IMO sih ini mestinya di-map, soalnya bunyi cymbal di sini kuat banget. Kalau dilewatin rasanya aneh. Gak mungkin kan ngikut vokal terus tapi instrumen kuat ginian dilewatin lol
5. 01:24:383 - Err, di Easy kan ini di-map pake slider... Kok di sini pake spinner? Kesannya gak konsisten gitu~ kinda nazi, fixed

>Hard

1. 00:49:625 - Yep, add finish juga kk. http://puu.sh/4jynT.jpg hitsounder nya payah banget (6)[/color
2. 00:55:211 (3,1) - Dua slider ini saling nyentuh satu sama lain; nampak aneh kalau main...
3. 00:58:935 - Tambah circle untuk ngikutin instrumen di sini dong; rasanya kosong dan bikin permainan gak enak kalau gak ada apa-apa.
4. 01:23:659 - Hmm, coba tambah circle lagi untuk ngasih penekanan buat ending lagunya? Biar akhir map-nya terasa lebih fun gitu~ Also biar sama kayak 01:04:107 (2,3,4,5,1). tapi dah susah, kalo jd tambah susah gk tau deh

>Moe Reality

1. 00:03:693 (3) - Pola di sini bakal kelihatan lebih rapi kalau ini dipindah ke (124,120). done
2. 00:13:935 (1,2,3) - Umm, coba Ctrl+G buat ritmenya? Terasa jauh lebih pas dari yang sekarang. ?
3. 00:16:521 (1,2) - Ritme ini lebih cocok dengan vokalnya. gak mau
4. 01:16:831 (1,2) - Uh, IMO, 1/4 jump di sini rasanya gak pas banget, terlalu tiba-tiba gitu... [/color]

Uh, just that I guess~

Good luck on the way

Xinely wrote:

@Xleonq : checked, sorry so many overmapped and i don't plan add anymore diffs ;-;
but thanks 4 made it anyways :3