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Sound Horizon - Yoiyami no Uta

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P A N
m4m from pm

[General]
  1. please add http://puu.sh/4qXMf.wav to your map, its very fit in some part like 01:50:633
[Hanashi]
  1. 01:24:260 (3,4,5) - add clap or whistle that i give on head for all.
  2. try to find a way to NC 01:40:084 (2)? I think NC would fit with the storyboard well.
  3. add soft custom 2 whistle on kick sound part example, 01:51:128 , 01:51:622 , 01:52:117
  4. 02:55:990 (1) - swap NC with 02:56:238 (4)
  5. 03:49:974 (3) - move tail 1 grid right for more blanket.
  6. 04:12:721 - I think all of this triangle look random, try to compose them. if you need example you can ask me later.
  7. 05:01:512 (1) - move tail 1 grid right for better blanket
  8. 09:10:249 (2,3,4) - move to 320|264 , 232|236 , 240|148 for star symmetry.
  9. 09:15:688 (5,6,7) - move to 408|24 , 308|48 , 284|148 for star symmetry.
  10. 09:26:073 (4,5,6,1) - move to 424|156 , 484|72 , 412|0 , 320|36 for star symmetry.
good luck :3 nice song
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

P A N wrote:

m4m from pm

[General]
  1. please add http://puu.sh/4qXMf.wav to your map, its very fit in some part like 01:50:633
Ok fixed in all song, i've used in some parts of song

[Hanashi]
  1. 01:24:260 (3,4,5) - add clap or whistle that i give on head for all.
  2. try to find a way to NC 01:40:084 (2)? I think NC would fit with the storyboard well.
  3. add soft custom 2 whistle on kick sound part example, 01:51:128 , 01:51:622 , 01:52:117
  4. 02:55:990 (1) - swap NC with 02:56:238 (4)
  5. 03:49:974 (3) - move tail 1 grid right for more blanket.
  6. 04:12:721 - I think all of this triangle look random, try to compose them. if you need example you can ask me later. It's a perfect triangle but 3 triangles rotated of 10°
  7. 05:01:512 (1) - move tail 1 grid right for better blanket
  8. 09:10:249 (2,3,4) - move to 320|264 , 232|236 , 240|148 for star symmetry.
  9. 09:15:688 (5,6,7) - move to 408|24 , 308|48 , 284|148 for star symmetry.
  10. 09:26:073 (4,5,6,1) - move to 424|156 , 484|72 , 412|0 , 320|36 for star symmetry.
good luck :3 nice song

Thanks ^^ all fixed except (?) Red
Kodora
From LKs' queue~

[General]

  1. Offset 853
  2. You dont need "marathon" in tags, just remove it
  3. Add "German" to tags
  4. Why "linked horizon" tagged here?
  5. You can add silent sliderside here - it will works good at calm parts
  6. I'd suggest you use tickrate 1 since you have 1/6 parts - tickrate 2 sounds very wrong on them since it always snaps by 1/4
[Hanashi]

  1. 01:19:974 (5,6) - This overlap doesnt looks pretty, also 01:20:798 (6) - not symmetrial with 01:19:315 (4,5) -
  2. 01:31:677 (1) - Remove last red anchorpoint to make form of this slider more pretty
  3. 01:32:172 (2,3,4) - They doesnt flows well, i also believe 01:32:501 (3) - can be symmetrial with 01:32:172 (2,4) -
  4. 01:33:655 (4,5,6) - Doesnt pretty at all. You can make a little triangle here for better slow using (4). Example:

  5. 01:39:754 (10,11,1) - Please keep same spacing between those notes for better playability
  6. 01:40:084 (1,2,3) - I believe you can make them flows better:

  7. 01:40:743 (4,1,2) - broken symmetry again
  8. 01:41:402 (2,3) - This antijump also feels bad. To make it more friendly try to use ctrl+g at 01:41:402 (2) -
  9. 02:00:029 (4) - Missed finish at the beginning of slider
  10. 02:00:688 (2) - Even if you want to keep symmethry you must always check spacing. This also bugged me a lot while playing - use x2.0 DS between 02:00:359 (1,2) - like you did it before
  11. 02:04:479 (4,5) - Linear jumps looks pretty bad here. Try something like this:

  12. 02:20:222 (4,5,1,2,3,4,5,6) - this is very overdone. Jumps must reflect the music; for this case its only mirroed symmethry. Below 2.80 is enough, seriously
  13. 02:32:007 (1,2) - Like in previous one, this looks like spacing issue. For this case you can just stack them manually
  14. 02:36:128 (3,4) - Again: bad flow. To fix it, try this: move 02:36:128 (3) - to x396 y216, then move 02:36:293 (4) - to x344 y112 and move 02:36:457 (5) - to x252 y44 - for consistent spacing
  15. 02:39:589 (5,7) - Linear curving estetically looks bad, remove red anchorpoints please
  16. 02:46:677 (3,4) - swap them on timeline for better flow
  17. 02:51:952 (4,1) - This overlap looks pretty bad, fix it please
  18. 02:56:402 (5,6,7) - Flows pretty bad. Try something like this instead:

  19. 03:00:853 (5,6) - Kind of spacing issue again
  20. 03:02:007 (3,5) - Hmm, maybe make them overlap a bit? :>

  21. 03:06:128 (5,6) - Spacing issue all over again.
  22. 03:09:424 (1,2,3,4) - those jumps are VERY overdone. Fullscreen jumps is something really too much imo
  23. 03:17:337 (1,1,1) - Estetical thing, but it looks really bad here. To prevent it you may change for of slider and make progressive raising speed of them (for example x0.75 - x1.00 - x1.25)
  24. 03:21:293 (1,2) - This fullscreen jump is really bad, reduse spacing please
  25. 03:37:117 (1) - Try something like this here?

  26. 03:46:018 (6,1) - Swap NC follow new part of music
  27. 04:17:996 (1) - Try to change your overlap to something like this:

  28. 05:02:666 (4) - this jump plays bad and actually very forced. Try something like this instead?

  29. 05:15:359 (3) - NC due to jump
  30. 05:16:018 (5) - ^
  31. 05:16:677 (7) - ^
  32. 05:33:161 (1,2,3) - Keep consistent spacing between those notes please
  33. 05:40:413 (6,7) - Spacing issue on stream
  34. 05:53:271 (5,6,7,8) - try something like this instead?

  35. 05:57:886 (6) - ctrl+G for better flow?
  36. 06:01:348 (1) - It's 1/6 actually, not 1/8
  37. 06:12:391 (5,6) - Plays enough bad, reduse spacing please
  38. 06:22:611 (4) - ctrl+H?
  39. 06:37:859 (1) - Finish instead of whistle sounds better for me
  40. 07:04:150 (5,6,7,8) - Those jumps are very overdone IMO
  41. 07:06:128 (3,4) - ^
  42. 07:13:381 (1,2,3,4,1,2) - Corner placed notes are usually boring, try more variable placement
  43. 07:31:842 (1) - Estetical thing, but form of this slider looks very, very bad.
  44. 07:35:798 (3,4) - When there is no point to stack better dont do it
  45. 07:39:754 (1) - Finish instead of whistle
  46. 08:12:391 (4) - Hide it under the end of slider instead of beginning to make it plays better
  47. 08:12:556 (1) - This form is really, really bad. Also it makes all next jumps feels wrong. Try to change it here, please.
  48. 08:39:424 (1) - Try Ctrl+G for better flow - and rework next slider placement, please
  49. 08:40:413 (5,1) - Stack them perfectly please
  50. 08:56:567 (7,8) - This is VERY overdone, reduse spacing here please
  51. 09:01:842 (7,8) - Spacing issue
  52. 09:08:765 (1,1,1,1,1) - Pretty much same estetical thing, it looks very bad.
  53. 09:37:776 (3) - NC due to jump please
  54. 09:55:578 (1,2) - Sliders snapped wrong: 09:55:578 (1) - should ends 2 ticks earlier and 09:56:402 (2) - should starts 2 ticks earlier
  55. 10:00:935 (1) - Add finish
Overral not bad, but flow needs some improvements.

Good luck~
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

Kodora wrote:

From LKs' queue~

[General]

  1. You dont need "marathon" in tags, just remove it
  2. Add "German" to tags
  3. Why "linked horizon" tagged here? Linked horizon is the same composer of Sound horizon, he use 2 different name for type of project compose
  4. You can add silent sliderside here - it will works good at calm parts
  5. I'd suggest you use tickrate 1 since you have 1/6 parts - tickrate 2 sounds very wrong on them since it always snaps by 1/4
[Hanashi]

  1. 01:19:974 (5,6) - This overlap doesnt looks pretty, also 01:20:798 (6) - not symmetrial with 01:19:315 (4,5) -
  2. 01:31:677 (1) - Remove last red anchorpoint to make form of this slider more pretty I prefer with it
  3. 01:32:172 (2,3,4) - They doesnt flows well, i also believe 01:32:501 (3) - can be symmetrial with 01:32:172 (2,4) -
  4. 01:33:655 (4,5,6) - Doesnt pretty at all. You can make a little triangle here for better slow using (4). Example:

  5. 01:39:754 (10,11,1) - Please keep same spacing between those notes for better playability
  6. 01:40:084 (1,2,3) - I believe you can make them flows better: Change some

  7. 01:40:743 (4,1,2) - broken symmetry again ??
  8. 01:41:402 (2,3) - This antijump also feels bad. To make it more friendly try to use ctrl+g at 01:41:402 (2) - Fixed in another way
  9. 02:00:029 (4) - Missed finish at the beginning of slider
  10. 02:00:688 (2) - Even if you want to keep symmethry you must always check spacing. This also bugged me a lot while playing - use x2.0 DS between 02:00:359 (1,2) - like you did it before
  11. 02:04:479 (4,5) - Linear jumps looks pretty bad here. Try something like this:

  12. 02:20:222 (4,5,1,2,3,4,5,6) - this is very overdone. Jumps must reflect the music; for this case its only mirroed symmethry. Below 2.80 is enough, seriously I like this spacing but i've fixed simmetry
  13. 02:32:007 (1,2) - Like in previous one, this looks like spacing issue. For this case you can just stack them manually
  14. 02:36:128 (3,4) - Again: bad flow. To fix it, try this: move 02:36:128 (3) - to x396 y216, then move 02:36:293 (4) - to x344 y112 and move 02:36:457 (5) - to x252 y44 - for consistent spacing
  15. 02:39:589 (5,7) - Linear curving estetically looks bad, remove red anchorpoints please
  16. 02:46:677 (3,4) - swap them on timeline for better flow
  17. 02:51:952 (4,1) - This overlap looks pretty bad, fix it please
  18. 02:56:402 (5,6,7) - Flows pretty bad. Try something like this instead:

  19. 03:00:853 (5,6) - Kind of spacing issue again
  20. 03:02:007 (3,5) - Hmm, maybe make them overlap a bit? :>

  21. 03:06:128 (5,6) - Spacing issue all over again.
  22. 03:09:424 (1,2,3,4) - those jumps are VERY overdone. Fullscreen jumps is something really too much imo
  23. 03:17:337 (1,1,1) - Estetical thing, but it looks really bad here. To prevent it you may change for of slider and make progressive raising speed of them (for example x0.75 - x1.00 - x1.25)
  24. 03:21:293 (1,2) - This fullscreen jump is really bad, reduse spacing please
  25. 03:37:117 (1) - Try something like this here?

  26. 03:46:018 (6,1) - Swap NC follow new part of music
  27. 04:17:996 (1) - Try to change your overlap to something like this: No

  28. 05:02:666 (4) - this jump plays bad and actually very forced. Try something like this instead?

  29. 05:15:359 (3) - NC due to jump
  30. 05:16:018 (5) - ^
  31. 05:16:677 (7) - ^
  32. 05:33:161 (1,2,3) - Keep consistent spacing between those notes please
  33. 05:40:413 (6,7) - Spacing issue on stream
  34. 05:53:271 (5,6,7,8) - try something like this instead? No prefer Jump -> low spacing -> jump

  35. 05:57:886 (6) - ctrl+G for better flow?
  36. 06:01:348 (1) - It's 1/6 actually, not 1/8
  37. 06:12:391 (5,6) - Plays enough bad, reduse spacing please No
  38. 06:22:611 (4) - ctrl+H?
  39. 06:37:859 (1) - Finish instead of whistle sounds better for me
  40. 07:04:150 (5,6,7,8) - Those jumps are very overdone IMO Not in my opinion ^^
  41. 07:06:128 (3,4) - ^ ^
  42. 07:13:381 (1,2,3,4,1,2) - Corner placed notes are usually boring, try more variable placement
  43. 07:31:842 (1) - Estetical thing, but form of this slider looks very, very bad.
  44. 07:35:798 (3,4) - When there is no point to stack better dont do it
  45. 07:39:754 (1) - Finish instead of whistle
  46. 08:12:391 (4) - Hide it under the end of slider instead of beginning to make it plays better
  47. 08:12:556 (1) - This form is really, really bad. Also it makes all next jumps feels wrong. Try to change it here, please. I like this shape
  48. 08:39:424 (1) - Try Ctrl+G for better flow - and rework next slider placement, please Fix in another way
  49. 08:40:413 (5,1) - Stack them perfectly please
  50. 08:56:567 (7,8) - This is VERY overdone, reduse spacing here please
  51. 09:01:842 (7,8) - Spacing issue
  52. 09:08:765 (1,1,1,1,1) - Pretty much same estetical thing, it looks very bad. Not for me
  53. 09:37:776 (3) - NC due to jump please
  54. 09:55:578 (1,2) - Sliders snapped wrong: 09:55:578 (1) - should ends 2 ticks earlier and 09:56:402 (2) - should starts 2 ticks earlier
  55. 10:00:935 (1) - Add finish I like without
Overral not bad, but flow needs some improvements.

Good luck~

Thanks ^^
P A N
no kds, recheck

09:10:413 (3,4) - move to 232|228 and 240|136 and move 09:11:402 (1) to stack with (4) (240|136) for better star symmetry.
09:15:359 (4) - move to 460|116
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

P A N wrote:

no kds, recheck

09:10:413 (3,4) - move to 232|228 and 240|136 and move 09:11:402 (1) to stack with (4) (240|136) for better star symmetry.
09:15:359 (4) - move to 460|116

Fixed all ^^
puncia
verde

[Hanashi]

  1. 01:51:622 (4) - muovi un paio di grid in basso per allinearlo e muovi leggermente anche 01:51:952 (5) di conseguenza
  2. 02:00:029 (4) - ti consiglio di spostarlo un po' più avanti (magari x:212 - y:180), se ascolti la musica rimane sempre tranquilla, non c'è bisogno di fare quel jump
  3. 02:11:567 (2) - questo non mi piace tanto, mantieni sempre la ritmica dello stream a 1/4 ma lo fai alla fine con spacing differente
  4. 02:26:567 (7,8,9) - flowa un po' male, fai Ctrl + G tra questi magari 02:26:567 (7,8), e se lo fai riposiziona 02:26:567 (7) bene rispetto allo slider
  5. 02:29:370 (4) - spostalo un po' più a sinistra così crea una diagonale dritta con l'altro circle e la testa dello slider
  6. 02:42:886 (7) - metti la y a 60 per farlo bene in linea con la testa della prima tripletta
  7. 03:24:589 (3,4) - la parte in cui ci sono tutti questi slider è un po' ripetiva, usi i circle solo per i jump. Rimpiazza quei due slider ad esempio con due circle (sostituendoli a testa e coda degli slider). È solo un'idea, perché troppi slider possono annoiare
  8. 04:15:359 (1) - questa dovrebbe essere una new combo, inizia una nuova serie di patterns e la song cambia
  9. 04:34:150 (1,2,3) - sistema lo spacing tra i tre
  10. 04:35:633 (7) - va spostato poco poco più a destra se vuoi una cosa simmetrica
  11. 04:45:194 (4,5,6,1) - un po' scomodo da giocare, fai un triangolo regolare tra questi 04:45:194 (4,5,6)

  12. 04:46:183 (2) - questa serie di slider hanno la punta un po' storta, se l'hai fatto apposta lascia perdere
  13. 05:33:655 (2) - mettilo un po' più sotto la coda dello slider, per il flow
  14. 05:38:930 (4) - questo è troppo distante dagli altri >_<
  15. 05:40:084 (2,3,4,5) - fai fare una curva un po' migliore a tutta questa parte di stream uscente dallo slider
  16. o fai questo 05:56:567 (5,6,7,8,9) stream meno spaced oppure aggiusti 05:57:062 (1,2,3) facendolo più ampio. È scomodo fare uno stream del genere e poi fermarsi all'interno per fare un pattern così piccolo. Tralaltro mi sembra che sia troppo distante da 05:57:556 (4,5) e che faccia poco flow così
  17. 06:06:128 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - l'hai fatto troppo incasinato, tieni conto che è lento ed è anche spaced. Puoi fare una cosa carina però: se ascolti, questi tre 06:06:128 (1,2,3) sono con la chitarra che cala, mentre gli altri tre 06:06:457 (4,5,6) sale. Puoi fare così:




    almeno sono ordinati

Part 2

  1. 07:52:941 (1,2,3) - non so se l'hai fatto apposta ma questo triangolo è un po' più stretto (l'hai fatto anche dopo ma forse stai seguendo la voce che diventa più bassa)
Seconda parte mooolto lunga
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

Puncia wrote:

verde

[Hanashi]

  1. 01:51:622 (4) - muovi un paio di grid in basso per allinearlo e muovi leggermente anche 01:51:952 (5) di conseguenza Ho alzato 3 e non abbassato 4 :3
  2. 02:00:029 (4) - ti consiglio di spostarlo un po' più avanti (magari x:212 - y:180), se ascolti la musica rimane sempre tranquilla, non c'è bisogno di fare quel jump Ok
  3. 02:11:567 (2) - questo non mi piace tanto, mantieni sempre la ritmica dello stream a 1/4 ma lo fai alla fine con spacing differente è 1/2 quello non 1/4
  4. 02:26:567 (7,8,9) - flowa un po' male, fai Ctrl + G tra questi magari 02:26:567 (7,8), e se lo fai riposiziona 02:26:567 (7) bene rispetto allo slider Ok
  5. 02:29:370 (4) - spostalo un po' più a sinistra così crea una diagonale dritta con l'altro circle e la testa dello slider Ho fatto un triangolo
  6. 02:42:886 (7) - metti la y a 60 per farlo bene in linea con la testa della prima tripletta Trovato un altro modo per sistemarla ho fatto un (1 tripletta) 3 (2 tripletta) 4 slider
  7. 03:24:589 (3,4) - la parte in cui ci sono tutti questi slider è un po' ripetiva, usi i circle solo per i jump. Rimpiazza quei due slider ad esempio con due circle (sostituendoli a testa e coda degli slider). È solo un'idea, perché troppi slider possono annoiare Fatto
  8. 04:15:359 (1) - questa dovrebbe essere una new combo, inizia una nuova serie di patterns e la song cambia C'è già NC
  9. 04:34:150 (1,2,3) - sistema lo spacing tra i tre è già giusto
  10. 04:35:633 (7) - va spostato poco poco più a destra se vuoi una cosa simmetrica Leggermente corretto ma era già quasi perfetto
  11. 04:45:194 (4,5,6,1) - un po' scomodo da giocare, fai un triangolo regolare tra questi 04:45:194 (4,5,6) non mi convince

  12. 04:46:183 (2) - questa serie di slider hanno la punta un po' storta, se l'hai fatto apposta lascia perdere
  13. 05:33:655 (2) - mettilo un po' più sotto la coda dello slider, per il flow Ok
  14. 05:38:930 (4) - questo è troppo distante dagli altri >_< Sistemato
  15. 05:40:084 (2,3,4,5) - fai fare una curva un po' migliore a tutta questa parte di stream uscente dallo slider Migliorata
  16. o fai questo 05:56:567 (5,6,7,8,9) stream meno spaced oppure aggiusti 05:57:062 (1,2,3) facendolo più ampio. È scomodo fare uno stream del genere e poi fermarsi all'interno per fare un pattern così piccolo. Tralaltro mi sembra che sia troppo distante da 05:57:556 (4,5) e che faccia poco flow così In quel punto l'ho fatto apposta di spezzare il flow per fare lento -> veloce -> lento, preferisco dare questa sensazione
  17. 06:06:128 (1,2,3,4,5,6) - l'hai fatto troppo incasinato, tieni conto che è lento ed è anche spaced. Puoi fare una cosa carina però: se ascolti, questi tre 06:06:128 (1,2,3) sono con la chitarra che cala, mentre gli altri tre 06:06:457 (4,5,6) sale. Puoi fare così:




    almeno sono ordinati
Ok sistemato un po


Te la continuerò dopo o domani
Grazie owo
AnataNoBaka
Ok, non ho trovato nessun errore particolare quindi mi limito a qualche piccolo consiglio sul pattern

[Hanashi]

01:27:227 (4,5) - io farei ctrl+h e poi ctrl+g quindi ctrl+h su 01:27:556 (6) -
02:21:292 (3,4) - io li ruoterei a -20° mentre questi 02:21:622 (5,6) - li ruoti di 20°
02:30:688 (4) - spostalo in x:114 y:364 per creare un rombo
02:57:721 (4) - scambialo con 02:57:886 (5) -
04:09:095 (3,4) - ruota un pò anche questi di tipo 10-15°
04:57:886 (5,1,2,3,4,5) - puoi far partire i jump da 04:57:886 (5) - e creare due triangoli
06:37:556 (6,7,8) - allargherei giusto un pò questo square
08:14:370 (2,3,4,5,6) - mi da l'impressione che spezzi un pò il flow , cerca di aggiustare un po quei jump
09:21:293 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - se li allarghi di tipo 20-25° ciascuno penso verrebbero più divertenti
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

AnataNoBaka wrote:

Ok, non ho trovato nessun errore particolare quindi mi limito a qualche piccolo consiglio sul pattern

[Hanashi]

01:27:227 (4,5) - io farei ctrl+h e poi ctrl+g quindi ctrl+h su 01:27:556 (6) - Non mi piace
02:21:292 (3,4) - io li ruoterei a -20° mentre questi 02:21:622 (5,6) - li ruoti di 20° Sembra più ordinato si
02:30:688 (4) - spostalo in x:114 y:364 per creare un rombo Preferisco il triangolo
02:57:721 (4) - scambialo con 02:57:886 (5) - Ok mi piace di più il jump
04:09:095 (3,4) - ruota un pò anche questi di tipo 10-15° Ok
04:57:886 (5,1,2,3,4,5) - puoi far partire i jump da 04:57:886 (5) - e creare due triangoli Preferisco questo pattern
06:37:556 (6,7,8) - allargherei giusto un pò questo square Massì abbondiamo con lo spacing un po
08:14:370 (2,3,4,5,6) - mi da l'impressione che spezzi un pò il flow , cerca di aggiustare un po quei jump Sistemato
09:21:293 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - se li allarghi di tipo 20-25° ciascuno penso verrebbero più divertenti Non c'è spazio
Grazie baka ^^
epocsodielaK
star :)
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

epocsodielaK wrote:

star :)
Oh thanks (・∀・)
Katsuri
test
_AI
M4M :3
*its midnight in my place and im relly tired orz, i will edit this post tmr for the mod
LOL10min

01:19:315 (4,5) - These two sound kinda odd, maybe following the piano would be better
01:24:260 (3,4,5) - Try bigger gap, avoid circle touching circle like 01:24:095 (2,4)
01:24:919 (5,6) - Too near to each other
02:22:941 (5,6) - Don't stack, a jump between maybe will help
02:27:227 (1,2) - A bracket or something will help, the original flow is kinda weird
08:29:205 (5,6) - ^
03:03:161 (1,2,3,4,5,6,1,2,3,4,5,6,1) - Fix the DS between notes and adjust the shape
03:34:315 (1) - Move away maybe? stack complete make player confuse *not nessacary
04:07:446 (1) - Adjust the curve, follow the stream
06:02:006 (6,1) - Make a jump between em
06:37:446 (5,6,7,8) - Please make a different shape/pattern for this
06:52:364 (1,1) - This look like ninja spinner, maybe something different will help
07:50:304 ~ 08:17:996 - o3o miku!
09:50:963 (2) - This should start earlier on 09:50:798
09:52:941 (1) - Start on 09:52:859
09:55:578 (1) - ^ 09:55:496
09:58:216 (1) - ^ 09:58:133

Goodluck for it~ :33
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

_AI wrote:

M4M :3
*its midnight in my place and im relly tired orz, i will edit this post tmr for the mod

Ok i'll wait ^^

_AI wrote:

M4M :3
*its midnight in my place and im relly tired orz, i will edit this post tmr for the mod
LOL10min

01:19:315 (4,5) - These two sound kinda odd, maybe following the piano would be better No
01:24:260 (3,4,5) - Try bigger gap, avoid circle touching circle like 01:24:095 (2,4) No
01:24:919 (5,6) - Too near to each other I know
02:22:941 (5,6) - Don't stack, a jump between maybe will help Ok
02:27:227 (1,2) - A bracket or something will help, the original flow is kinda weird I like this
08:29:205 (5,6) - ^ Ok fixed
03:03:161 (1,2,3,4,5,6,1,2,3,4,5,6,1) - Fix the DS between notes and adjust the shape Thanks
03:34:315 (1) - Move away maybe? stack complete make player confuse *not nessacary Ok
04:07:446 (1) - Adjust the curve, follow the stream Ok
06:02:006 (6,1) - Make a jump between em Yes
06:37:446 (5,6,7,8) - Please make a different shape/pattern for this Nope i like it
06:52:364 (1,1) - This look like ninja spinner, maybe something different will help I prefer spinner owo, this spinenrs are rankable
07:50:304 ~ 08:17:996 - o3o miku! :D
09:50:963 (2) - This should start earlier on 09:50:798 Hard to read
09:52:941 (1) - Start on 09:52:859 Hard to read
09:55:578 (1) - ^ 09:55:496 Hard to read
09:58:216 (1) - ^ 09:58:133 Hard to read

Goodluck for it~ :33
Thanks :D
Rakuen
( =`・ω・´) Rakuen 楽園 (Mod/GD/M4M)

Hi~
I'm not good at modding crazy maps / qualified maps, don't blame me >.>

[Hanashi]
Qualified map but I suggest not to can raise and lower the SV randomly at KIAI time
01:54:424 (2,3) - Not suitable for jump
02:00:688 (2) - Stack on 02:00:359 (1) - like this 02:32:007 (1,2) -
02:06:787 (3,4) - Swap place
02:32:831 (2) - Flow broke
02:46:677 (3,4) - Swap place
02:52:611 (2) - Stack the slider tail on head of 02:51:952 (4) - for better flow
02:53:271 (4) - Move it closer to last few sliders
03:01:512 (1) - Too close to the last note, add circle on 03:01:348 - if suitable
03:06:457 (6) - Stack with 03:06:128 (5) -
03:21:952 - Raising volume of hitsound here sounds disgusting for me
03:25:908 (3,4,5,6) - Follow the beat sound instead of vocal
03:32:501 (3,4,5,6) - Same as previous
03:33:820 (3) - This slider and 03:34:315 (1) - is awful after stacking each other
04:54:095 (3) - Remove clap
04:54:260 - ^
05:14:699 (1) - A little bit hard starts from here, too far jump IMO
06:03:161 (4) - Why 1/3, remian 1/4
06:33:820 - This part is strange
06:34:809 - Missed a clap
07:01:595 - Clap here, applies for 07:01:512 (5,6,7,8) -
07:04:150 (5) - NC here and the drum hit starts here 07:04:315 - , extend the hitsound by 1 red tick for the notes behind too (use 50% playback and see)
07:57:721 (3,4,5,1,2,3) - This placement is different with other notes, make it constant or change to slider to prevent miss
09:15:359 - Same as previous, don't raise the sound
09:25:908 - ^

Hope it helps.
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

Rakuen wrote:

( =`・ω・´) Rakuen 楽園 (Mod/GD/M4M)

Hi~
I'm not good at modding crazy maps / qualified maps, don't blame me >.>

[Hanashi]
Qualified map but I suggest not to can raise and lower the SV randomly at KIAI time
01:54:424 (2,3) - Not suitable for jump Ok
02:00:688 (2) - Stack on 02:00:359 (1) - like this 02:32:007 (1,2) - No
02:06:787 (3,4) - Swap place Ok it's better
02:32:831 (2) - Flow broke No
02:46:677 (3,4) - Swap place No
02:52:611 (2) - Stack the slider tail on head of 02:51:952 (4) - for better flow Ok
02:53:271 (4) - Move it closer to last few sliders Fixed in other way
03:01:512 (1) - Too close to the last note, add circle on 03:01:348 - if suitable Fixed in other way
03:06:457 (6) - Stack with 03:06:128 (5) - Ok
03:21:952 - Raising volume of hitsound here sounds disgusting for me I think is not bad
03:25:908 (3,4,5,6) - Follow the beat sound instead of vocal
03:32:501 (3,4,5,6) - Same as previous
03:33:820 (3) - This slider and 03:34:315 (1) - is awful after stacking each other
04:54:095 (3) - Remove clap Ok
04:54:260 - ^ ^
05:14:699 (1) - A little bit hard starts from here, too far jump IMO For me it's ok
06:03:161 (4) - Why 1/3, remian 1/4 I want mapping this part in 1/3
06:33:820 - This part is strange
06:34:809 - Missed a clap Thanks
07:01:595 - Clap here, applies for 07:01:512 (5,6,7,8) - Ok
07:04:150 (5) - NC here and the drum hit starts here 07:04:315 - , extend the hitsound by 1 red tick for the notes behind too (use 50% playback and see) No
07:57:721 (3,4,5,1,2,3) - This placement is different with other notes, make it constant or change to slider to prevent miss
09:15:359 - Same as previous, don't raise the sound No
09:25:908 - ^ No

Hope it helps.

Thanks I'll mod ^^
neurosis
pizza kun best jumps
Topic Starter
Pizza Kun

emmy wrote:

pizza kun best jumps

Thanks ^^
ErunamoJAZZ
oh, many jumps and symmetry, and... i think you abuse of spinners.
hehe, (i play very bad with tablet ~_~) http://puu.sh/8xXMa.osr
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