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Rhythm Incarnate
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This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on 2017年12月23日 at 22:17:41

Artist: Larval Stage Planning
Title: Hanabira to Ribbon
Source: 魔女こいにっき
Tags: Majo koi nikki eroge opening
BPM: 134
Filesize: 3350kb
Play Time: 01:52
Difficulties Available:
  • Easy (1.24 stars, 88 notes)
  • Hard (2.98 stars, 220 notes)
  • Insane (4.28 stars, 285 notes)
  • Normal (1.73 stars, 138 notes)

Download: Larval Stage Planning - Hanabira to Ribbon
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
#8
E me
N me
H me
I me

for beginners
not pp (DTHD) map. sorry xd
Last edited by Asuka_- on , edited 34 times in total.
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Combo Commander
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Rhythm Incarnate
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Dubturt wrote:
eroge pp uwu


oxo
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Rhythm Incarnate
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wait me
irc
    2017-10-28 18:27 makisokk: 01:05:421 (2) -
    2017-10-28 18:27 makisokk: This
    2017-10-28 18:28 makisokk: You can use this [https://gyazo.com/7b09baff5fc62e28b02a10b1496fee79 rhythm] he better
    2017-10-28 18:28 Asuka_-: which diff
    2017-10-28 18:28 makisokk: Easy
    2017-10-28 18:28 makisokk: 01:08:555 (2) - this too ^
    2017-10-28 18:41 makisokk: Normal
    2017-10-28 18:41 makisokk: 00:40:794 (6,1) - can blanket
    2017-10-28 18:41 makisokk: 00:42:585 (3,4) - do stack in 1/2 bad idea
    2017-10-28 18:41 makisokk: 00:52:436 (2,3) - ^
    2017-10-28 18:42 makisokk: 01:02:286 (6,7,1) - ohh, this really bad idea?
    2017-10-28 18:44 makisokk: Hard
    2017-10-28 18:44 makisokk: 00:31:839 (4,1) - little fix blanket
    2017-10-28 18:48 makisokk: Isane looks fine
Last edited by makisokk on , edited 1 time in total.
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#modreqs


ez
  • 00:52:884 (2,3,4) - quite an obvious DS error, and also trigger the AImod, should be fixed
  • 01:04:973 - 01:05:868 - no idea why you suddenly leaving some empty spots while there are no real reason for it since the first point it has pretty strong vocal and the second one have good drums. I'd say to add some circles for both
  • 01:08:555 (2) - somehow this slider feels out of place since 01:09:003 - has a pretty strong sound that need to be covered, maybe you can change this into a 1/1 repeat




nm
  • 01:02:286 (6,7,1,2,3) - might confuse the player since there's two kind of stacks and it's pretty close on each other so player might finding it hard to see the difference. Maybe you can try to unstack 01:03:406 (2,3) - and put 2 somewhere else
  • 01:09:003 (5,6,1) - kinda missed on a good structure. Try to fix the triangle pattern from these.
  • 01:47:958 - no real reason to not map this one because it actually need to be clicked because of the styrong drum, since it's on kiai section you can add a circle at here despite it'll increase the density




h
  • 00:33:630 (3,1) - maybe you can try to add more DS for these two to emphasize the vocal more? it'd be fit actually
  • 00:40:122 - mapping this one would be a good option instead making a sudden awwkard emptiness.
  • 00:44:600 (8,1) - same issue like the first point, 1 have cymbal's sound at it have stronger sound too so you need to give more impact than the other, that's why i recommend you to create a jump to emphasize things . this also applies to other similar parts that you can think off
  • no idea why it's only this diff that doesn't have any spinner on it, should add one i'd say




ins
  • 00:34:973 (3,4) - a bit awkward , i'd say. you can try to ctrl+g 3 and it'll fix the awkward flow and things
  • 00:40:122 - same thing that i mentioned on hard diff, leaving a sudden awkwardness from sudden empty things even though the music didn't tell so makes things a bit confusing actually.
  • 00:41:241 - mmmmmm don't think a spinner would be fine for this one
  • 00:45:719 (3,4,5,1) - kinda bad structure for me since it has different space with each other that make things look kinda crumbled. Try to fix these by making sure that it has same "body space"
  • 00:47:958 (5,6,1) - the thing that actually need emphasize is actually 6 not 1 , therefore you can move 6 afar from 5 and maybe you can try stack it to 1
  • 00:49:301 (3,4,5) - you can try to create a better triangle pattern with these things to increase the structure
  • man, the kiai suddenly have such a huge DS increase while song based it's actually not that different. Maybe you can try to nerf some of the jumps like 01:30:495 (1,2) - 01:30:271 (4,1) - especially 4,1 where the vocal actually goes down instead up and many more

Insane actually need more attention and works while the other diffs are just fine.
gl
Rhythm Incarnate
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Hi !


Insane
00:39:450 (1,2,3) - This feels really random. What are you giving impact to ? Vocals at 00:39:898 (2) - are as long as at 00:39:450 (1) - so it deserves a slider instead of a circle too.
01:00:943 (1) - This doesn't feel emphasized at all, I recommand stacking those circles 01:00:495 (4,5) -
01:02:062 (4,5,6) - Those claps don't sound right...
01:04:301 (4) - Placing it like that completely kills the curve of (3). I think you can do better
01:30:495 (1,2) - These sliders don't provide any impact because they are overspaced. It can work much better if you reduce spacing.


Hard
01:16:391 (4,5) - Lacks of hitsounding.
01:18:182 (6,7,8,1,2,3) - Feels too dense compared to the rest of the map. You can get rid of one triplet.

Good luck.
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Spinner Sage
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Hello! ~ From my queue

Insane
00:31:839 (5,1) - rip spacing
00:33:853 (6,1) - same
00:36:540 (3,4,5) - it's hard to read, so I recommend to do something like this ~
00:37:100 (4,5,2) - stack second slider with 5th circle ~ https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9402316
00:43:928 (6,7,8,9) - you can make good triangle ~ https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9402331
00:53:779 (1,2) - rip spacing
00:58:033 (5,6,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8) - this flow makes me sad :(
01:18:182 (2,3,4,5,1,2) - if you do something like this, then use DISTANCE SNAP
01:30:495 (1,2) - i think #100k-#50k player can get confused because of these sliders
01:47:958 (2,3,4,5,6,7,1) - this spacing is SO BIG for insane


Good luck with map! ;)
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Slider Savant
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Hi!
From mod req!
NM

Okay Let's see here...

Hard

00:40:346 (2) - (mmm, can you do this?)

Image

Maybe Looks better (For me)

00:41:241 (1) - (Add Hitsound "Clap" In the finish)

00:42:137 (3) - (Add Hitsound "Clap" In the finish)

01:06:316 (1) - (Add Hitsound "Finish", Maybe Sounds better)

01:16:615 (5) - (Add Hitsound "Clap" )

01:17:510 (4,8) - (Add Hitsound "Whistle")

01:51:092 (1,2,5) - (Add "Clap" MAYBE Sounds better..)

Insane

00:41:241 (1) - (Why That Spinner?) (Change this)

01:19:749 (6) - (NC Here "New Combo")

Easy

00:42:585 (2) - (Add Hitsound "Clap")

00:41:241 (1) - (Delete in the start the hitsound "Clap", and put hitsound "Clap" in the finish)

00:51:093 (4) - (Add Hitsound "CLap" in the finish)

01:27:809 (1) - (Add hitsound "Finish" in the start)

01:51:092 (1) - (Add Hitsound "Finish")

The Normal It's Perfect (For me)

Good map and Good song Dude! GOOD LUCK! :D :D
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Rhythm Incarnate
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Insane
  • 00:41:241 (1) - moving this spinner a tick away and add a circle here would make it cooler
  • 01:05:868 (4) - I would move this away to emphasize (5) better. (5) deserves more spacing
  • 01:10:794 (3) - why is this so far away? it looks off move it closer and blanket with (2)
  • 01:11:913 - shouldn't skip a sound here actually keeping 1/2 gap would be cooler
  • 01:19:749 (6,7,8,9,10) - stream shape could use some polish the (9, 10) looks off
  • 01:30:495 (1,2) - using a weird shape here, while it does nothing on gameplay, can throw the player off. And I dont see you introduce weird shaped sliders early on. I would just curve this a bit or actually just make it point toward the centre of the map.
  • 01:38:331 (6) - too far

Hard
  • 01:15:943 (3,4,5) - this just doesn't work.... I suggest this instead
    image
    Image
  • 01:20:421 (9) - should be a triplet on the (1) slider actually due to its different sound
  • 01:26:913 (3) - this shape stands out too much, try to make it more moderate
  • 01:33:853 (3) - i would suggest making this a triplet on top of the (4) repeat slider would work better
  • When the Kiai hits, the map just starts spinning in one direction which I don't quite like it but it's too late now I guess. You could have used some jumps there and there considering how hard the insane is.

Normal
  • 00:42:137 (2,3,4) - try this, works much better
    image
    Image
  • 01:02:286 (6,7,1) - 3 consecutive clickable 1/2 rhythm is questionable on Normal difficulty. But you have an Easy so it might work out. Ask how other people think about this.
  • 01:17:286 - insert break time
  • 01:33:182 (4,5) - When the gap is big like 2 beats apart, you dont have to precisely follow the distance snap actually. You can work around the angry AImod by simply using NC on the objects and it will prevent the AImod from pointing it out as issues. In case you didn't know.

Easy
  • 01:17:286 - add break time
  • It's fine, not like you can go wrong with Easy anyway.

except the weird rhythm on Hard, everything else looks good to me
Good luck!
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Cymbal Sounder
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Hey its me from my modding queue, saw your post,
im new in modding and mapping in general.
Imma do what i can to mod your map :D



DIFFICULTY

INSANE

00:31:391 (1) - New Combo (NC)
00:32:286 (1) - NC
00:33:182 (1) - NC
Based on my observation your map follows mostly the beat of the song and not the vocals so why not make it like
(1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) or if theres slider (1,1,2,3)
(1,1) represents the slider and its tail
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
00:34:077 (1) - what are you mapping here?
Maybe you can adjust the slider to
00:33:853 (1) - https://imgur.com/a/n8htD - cuz thats where the vocals starts

---------------------------------------------------------------------
adjust this spinner
00:41:241 (1) -
to
00:41:130 (1) - to give players a bit of time to re adjust their cursor
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This slider here 00:54:674 (4) - points down while the next note goes up, makes the flow a bit awkward, whats your intention here?
Perhaps you can adjust it this way -
https://imgur.com/a/0nf91
just to maybe improve the flow of your map -
https://imgur.com/a/TXtCS


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In the kiai time, i noticed that you put jumps that are too far from each other, I dont know whats your intention there but may i suggest that
you put some patterns, put a variety of them but make sure they go smoothly with the flow of your map

examples of patterns you can use in kiai:
https://imgur.com/8EqUd7x
Squares

https://imgur.com/IMTD9Ab
Stars

https://imgur.com/LgFW6cn
I don't know

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



also at 01:52:995 (1) - may i suggest you add a spinner? kinda suits the fading out of the music ya know ;)
-------------------------------------------------------

Note: I'm not forcing you to follow these, its more of a guide just to improve your map a bit, the only thing i suggest you should follow is the Combo pattern :)
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Star Shooter
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Hi from q!
General
Can you found FULL HD background please?

Easy
00:30:495 - bookmark not snapped
00:37:659 (1) - maybe x:296 y:240
00:38:555 (2) - https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9413218
00:39:003 - maybe end there circle or make big slider like that https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9413229
00:51:988 (1,2,3,4) - same ^^

Normal
00:30:495 - bookmark not snapped
00:37:212 (6) - x:24 y:208
00:42:809 (4) - make there anything, i hear 2 notes there.
00:56:913 (3,4,5) - uh, this stack really hard. make anything.
01:34:301 (5,6,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2,3,4,5) - you don't think about it's REALLY HARD for player? it's confusing new player.


Insane
00:30:495 - bookmark not snapped
00:41:241 (1) - for what spinner there?
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Combo Commander
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unquality mod
General
  • Please take care of your sound choicement on low diff

Normal

Hard

Insane

Good Luck

Edit: this template is not taken from timemon's template kappa
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Rhythm Incarnate
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Shurelia
Shurelia wrote:


nm
  • 01:47:958 - no real reason to not map this one because it actually need to be clicked because of the styrong drum, since it's on kiai section you can add a circle at here despite it'll increase the density
    Basically follow vocal. In order to emphasize 01: 48: 182 -, we had to empty 01:47:958 - .
    Sure there is a drum sound there, but I think it's fine but i'll chenge if bn say about this




h
  • 00:33:630 (3,1) - maybe you can try to add more DS for these two to emphasize the vocal more? it'd be fit actually
  • 00:44:600 (8,1) - same issue like the first point, 1 have cymbal's sound at it have stronger sound too so you need to give more impact than the other, that's why i recommend you to create a jump to emphasize things . this also applies to other similar parts that you can think off
  • no idea why it's only this diff that doesn't have any spinner on it, should add one i'd say
    this diff is for dthdhr. i want to keep ds overall. spinners is hard to read when play with dthdhr. so i keep




ins
  • 00:41:241 - mmmmmm don't think a spinner would be fine for this one i want to keep lol
  • man, the kiai suddenly have such a huge DS increase while song based it's actually not that different. Maybe you can try to nerf some of the jumps like 01:30:495 (1,2) - 01:30:271 (4,1) - especially 4,1 where the vocal actually goes down instead up and many more little changed


6th
6th wrote:


Insane
00:39:450 (1,2,3) - This feels really random. What are you giving impact to ? Vocals at 00:39:898 (2) - are as long as at 00:39:450 (1) - so it deserves a slider instead of a circle too. it's fine
01:00:943 (1) - This doesn't feel emphasized at all, I recommand stacking those circles 01:00:495 (4,5) - decreased ds


Rus_Brony_osu
Rus_Brony_osu wrote:
Hello! ~ From my queue
00:31:839 (5,1) - rip spacing xd
00:33:853 (6,1) - same ^
00:36:540 (3,4,5) - it's hard to read, so I recommend to do something like this ~ i dont think so...
00:37:100 (4,5,2) - stack second slider with 5th circle ~ https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9402316 ^
00:43:928 (6,7,8,9) - you can make good triangle ~ https://osu.ppy.sh/ss/9402331 ^
00:53:779 (1,2) - rip spacing ^
01:18:182 (2,3,4,5,1,2) - if you do something like this, then use DISTANCE SNAP ^

July - San
July - San wrote:

Hard

00:40:346 (2) - (mmm, can you do this?)
Image
Maybe Looks better (For me)

i want to follow vocal here


timemon
timemon wrote:
Insane
  • 00:41:241 (1) - moving this spinner a tick away and add a circle here would make it cooler i want to keep
  • 01:10:794 (3) - why is this so far away? it looks off move it closer and blanket with (2) playablilyty.
  • 01:11:913 - shouldn't skip a sound here actually keeping 1/2 gap would be cooler now is cool imo and easy to play for dthd player imo
  • 01:30:495 (1,2) - using a weird shape here, while it does nothing on gameplay, can throw the player off. And I dont see you introduce weird shaped sliders early on. I would just curve this a bit or actually just make it point toward the centre of the map.
    i'll ask some people to testplay. decrease distance
  • 01:38:331 (6) - too far bit changed

Hard
  • 01:15:943 (3,4,5) - this just doesn't work.... I suggest this instead hm... it's fine?
  • 01:26:913 (3) - this shape stands out too much, try to make it more moderate chaned shape
  • 01:33:853 (3) - i would suggest making this a triplet on top of the (4) repeat slider would work better ^
  • When the Kiai hits, the map just starts spinning in one direction which I don't quite like it but it's too late now I guess. You could have used some jumps there and there considering how hard the insane is. this diff is for dt hd hr. so i wanna keep it for nowlol

Azinlen
Azinlen wrote:
Hi from q!
General
Can you found FULL HD background please? no xd
Normal
00:42:809 (4) - make there anything, i hear 2 notes there. hmm?
01:34:301 (5,6,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2,3,4,5) - you don't think about it's REALLY HARD for player? it's confusing new player. it's fine because this is low bpm
Insane
00:41:241 (1) - for what spinner there? fun i think lol

Uta
Uta wrote:
unquality mod
General
  • Please take care of your sound choicement on low diff ?

Normal

Hard

Insane

Good Luck


makisokk
makisokk wrote:
wait me


removed, not red comment= fixed or changed (little)
red comment = keep

Thanks!!
Rhythm Incarnate
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Keep in mind that maps should be designed for no mod.
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Beatmap Nominator
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insane
00:41:241 (1) - not a big fan of the spinner usage here, map it out like you did in hard please :S
01:03:630 (3,2) - blanket?
01:06:316 (1,3) - why the overlapping here? it just doesn't seem to fit with your style lol
01:51:764 (4,7) - NC?


hard
01:20:197 (6) - a bit overmapped i think a circle would be fine, or add repeat on 01:19:973 (5) -

normal
01:20:644 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2,3,4,5) - chain of 1/2 a bit too long, try to have a 1/1 break somewhere
01:34:973 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,1,2,3,4,5) - ^

easy is fine

metadata and call me bak
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